 I'll say David. I'm in New York. All right. All right. All right. All right. We're rolling by the way I just want to check my levels. It's very sad that I have to do all this, but my producer Alex Brazell. Oh He's in he's in Spain right now Okay, yes, I'm doing everything by myself and By the way, he lives at 501 Klingston Street in Edgewater, New Jersey. He leaves the backdoor open and he's got a Ty Cobb rookie card Framed above his bed if anybody wants to take it take a look at it. It's I Love that you just put his personal dress on You know, I know that he would want people to come to his place 501 Klingston Avenue Backdoor Wide open. He's away for two weeks and there's a Ty Cobb rookie card above his bed and everybody should see it Hey, are you still there? Yep, I'm here, man. This is exciting. This is so exciting. The White House Correspondence dinner is tomorrow Saturday Hassan Minaj from the Daily Show. What are you doing? Nothing. Did you just shut? What are you doing? Oh close the window. Sorry. Are you close the window? That's a good thing because Well, you know that a lot of people defenestrate in the middle of an interview with David Feldman Don't take it so personally David, I was trying to make it better. Oh, okay, but if you do defenestrate Hold on to the phone so we can hear we had Brody Stevens Brody Stevens peed on the show last perfect Perfect there you go. So if you at least I was not I was only defenestrating. Yes, not even I make the same week many people accuse me of chronic defenestration and This is why nobody listens to my show Can I do the in can I do the introduction? Please without you jumping out please? Thank you. Thank you What was that? What was that my apologies? What was that sound that that was me apologize. Yeah, but there was like that Okay, the what? You opened the window again, didn't you there are two windows open I closed one This is turning out to be the greatest interview I've ever done We're off to the there you go both windows are not closed. Okay. We're now we will not hear we will not hear the ambient Parking sorry the honking of New York City anymore. All right 15 minutes into the interview It's now time for my audience to know who I'm talking to the White House But what about the defenestration you forgot about addressing that You know what? I'm gonna jump out the window if you don't be quiet the White House Correspondence Dinner is tomorrow Saturday Hassan Minaj from the Daily Show will be performing Unfortunately, I couldn't get Hassan Minaj. I Tried But there's bad blood between me and the Daily I don't know something. I know he doesn't return my calls instead. We have one of the guys writing for This is about as bad as it gets I also do security for him I'm his driver We have His writer Ujur Uzman. He's a comedian actor and writer He's one of the stars of the new Amazon series Patriot, which has been renewed for a second season He's toured over 25 countries as a comedian Dave Chappelle Calls him untouchable, which is why Ujur has opened for Dave other you keep you keep fucking it up, man. It's other But that's all right. Don't be go ahead. Azar. Azar Yes, I just I just want to make it the worst introduction In the history of the name of film and podcast Dave Chappelle Dave Chappelle calls Azar Ujur He calls you Ujur behind your back And that's where you got it from I got yeah, and he calls you he calls Azar un touchable Choblay I don't know if this is a fake laugh. Are you real? Yeah, but that's all the time. We're at we're on a time We're all the time. Thanks. We're wonderful to be with you Thanks for doing this. I really appreciate it. I really appreciate it So thank you for doing this. So let's start off with the White House Correspondence Center. How do you sleep at night? Supporting yeah, it's been very difficult to be honest, but it's wrong It's immoral the White House Correspondence Center is immoral and you shouldn't be going there even if Trump isn't showing up Well, how do you how do you figure that? It's immoral because it's self aggrandizement. It's the press Wasting millions of dollars Celebrating themselves when they should be out Covering Trump covering the crimes that are being committed in our name instead They've turned this into their own Academy Awards aren't we great and then they then they go Oh, but we you know, we have a couple of scholarships for for young reporters But it's BS It's got to come to an end and you have to draw a line on the sand my friend and boycott tomorrow's White House Correspondence and you you and Hassan what get me Hassan on the line I he needs to cancel at the last minute and send us. Oh my god. How amazing would that be? He needs to send a signal that this has to stop. It has to stop I don't know how much of this is you being a hundred percent. I know that there's some Clearly there's some sincere content behind what you're saying But I feel like it's 90 10 like 90% bullshit Serious, but I mean look, yeah to answer your question. How do I sleep at night? I mean, it's not because of the moral dilemma. It's because of the pressure to navigate a freaking minefield of All these competing considerations With all the you know, there's a lot of tension man. He's not Trump's not coming He's basically prohibited anybody from his administration from attending and so trying to make you know the people in the room Laugh, but also keeping an eye towards the fact that anybody who watches it really will watch it online later and How do you write a killer set for that context has been it's been an interesting challenge man Yeah, I guess you've written you've written for these like award shows and stuff I don't think I ever wrote for a White House Correspondence dinner. It's a tough It's a tough one because normally you have to go on after the president, right? Which is just a little bit of a little less pressure for that reason. That's one good thing Right, you don't have to follow the president. Although did you go? Did you see the Al Smith dinner? last hmm, I feel like I Do not see it. Well the Al Smith dinner for our listeners around the world and we do have listeners around the world Nice the Al Smith six and I was six of them y'all six Got it And like in if you seven if you include the former KGB they listen to everything I do Yeah, they listen to everything so the Al Smith dinner is held every year at the Waldorf. It's for the Catholic Church Al Smith was a yeah. Yeah, I did see that. Yes. I did see that with when Trump and Hillary both went up. Yes Yes to go ahead. Sorry. It was remarkable because Hillary was you know in the ballpark funny She took some jokes from her writers and she told them and she's not a Intrinsically funny person the way Obama was or Mc McCain was funny But she did okay and then Donald he's an expert on everything. He knows everything. So he just got up there He didn't he didn't need writers And it was amazing to watch So so tone deaf So wrong so bad Which is surprising because he's got the moves of a comedian when he does one of his rallies Right, he's kind of yeah. Oh, no, absolutely. I remember watching his set on that and thinking like man He just had bad, you know advice from comics or writers because whoever wrote those quote-unquote jokes for him Just didn't play to his strengths and the fact that the guy is already inherently hilarious and It's constantly, you know, just being himself. He's funny. He didn't need to dig so hard He really started attacking Hillary and just the crowd turned on him really bad Anyway, it was it was a it was a thing of beauty. Yeah watching this guy bomb in front of well Let's address let's let's address the elephant in the room You are the camel in the room. Well, I was gonna make the that the fact that you're Indian I am Indian and you're on top of an elephant. That was the joke. I was gonna go but I like the camel in the room better Let's address the camel Shall we yeah Go ahead. So you are Muslim I am But you're from Indian parents Correct and I'm sorry that would be native Indian parents, right? Well, we say native Indian it makes people think What happened? What did you break? My boy Mo Amher is in the room and he's just like a bullet a china shop Dropping things and destroying the property. So he accidentally dropped Something I think he dropped some cologne on the desk But he's leaving the room to make make make some He's gonna make noise elsewhere If you're if you're if you live in India and you're Indian Yes, you would be a native Indian. That is correct. Okay, that is correct and yet and yet you're Muslim So why didn't you move to Pakistan? Why didn't your grandparents move to Pakistan when Lord Mountbatten? So very good question fair question, man so well first of all just thank you for being aware of that history and It's so funny to me because you know, I grew up Muslim in the United States Complaining to my parents like you have no idea what it feels like to be a minority and they're like dude We grew up Muslim in India. What the hell are you talking about? Yes? We do know what it feels like to be a minority and It was not until I you know became an adult and ran the numbers and figured out like Though Muslims in India are statistically a minority It's such a big country that nominally the actual number of Muslims in India is huge It's like a hundred and something million and there are actually more Indian Muslims on earth than there are Arab Muslims combined I didn't know that. Yeah, it's pretty insane. Okay, let me ask you a question about this mm-hmm Is it fair to say that the Muslims in India are doing better Because they're a minority Then they are in Pakistan where they're the majority. Is there some empowerment that comes with being a minority? I Will say yes and no, I mean the thing is Muslims in India are you know, kind of ghettoized in a lot of ways and There's a lot of poverty, you know Hyderabad is probably one of the largest states where there's its significant Muslim population and It's you know kind of Very similar and analogous to the way in our country. We have a very clear racial divide and access to resources You know the structural Aspects of racism that limit access to education housing and economic opportunity Those same phenomena are alive and well across the planet And so you can pick anyone already grew pretty much anywhere and you'll find a very similar Type of dynamic so India is no exception to that but you do it, but you do have very successful Muslims living in India. Yeah, and that's what I was about to say now having said that that might be the rule But there are definitely, you know a number of exceptional cases where you might have you know people rising to tremendous All the levels of prominence either in business or academia or media or what I have you Dave So they're hanging on Dave Chappelle called you untouchable Untouchable in India would make you I'm being serious. Of course. I know the cash system. Yeah Well, if you're not gonna treat me with respect You have a legal degree, don't you I do I used to be a lawyer, man Wait, were you an attorney as well? No, I'm but I I'm going through a divorce and I do you are Yes, and I and just just you so you know as we go further into this interview I am going to be disrespectful to you That's not perfectly fine. Not because I'm Jewish and you're Muslim It's because you're an attorney So all I can say to that is Shabbat Shalom Boy, you really are a sleazy attorney I Used to be used to be I'm a recovery I'm a recovery attorney. So just so the people listening I this is not resentment that you grew up in Skokie as a Muslim and your parents Secretly encouraged the Nazis to march in Skokie. I know the truth Were you were you don't even joke about that? I know were you I know were you were you alive? Were you born yet when they marched in Skokie? No, I was not alive when they marched, but I was born in 1975 Okay, but I do distinctly remember when I learned about the whole history because the Skokie public library When I was in I think middle school or high school had unveiled this Holocaust Memorial outside the library, which was of course, you know expeditiously graffitied by Some neo-nazis with with swastika and then it became a whole of obviously, you know new situation and everybody was talking about it and then in the midst of that whole controversy at that time I For the first time ever just learned about all this incredible history Skokie is the subject of you know a landmark Supreme Court case a documentary film made about it a feature film made about it. So I was like, oh my god This is a very historic town and it's interesting to me now as a comic because it's like that whole dispute was over free speech right and It's interesting also that the ACLU at that time. This is how the country is completely flipped represented the neo-nazis Mm-hmm. Well, they still would they still would exactly but what they're right now They are now their hand they would represent and Coulter who's an original Nazi. She's an og They could how we were that be the ACLU representing Steve Bannon as a Nazi, but they would I know they would they would Well, but that's isn't that the heart of the whole argument that's happening. Yeah, I have three is hate speech free speech That's the question your honor. I would like to control the line of questioning here, please Okay, so there are three areas that I want to talk about with you right now I want to talk about and Coulter freedom of speech Mm-hmm. So write that down. We'll get to and Coulter in a second. I also want to talk about you saying Let's not joke about that you see I kind of offended you when I said your parents Invited the support of the neo-nazis. Yeah, I want to talk to you about that in a second because that's about Political correctness and who can make jokes and who can't yes, but we glossed over something that's really important and that was Lord Mountbatten after World War two He was kind of the emperor well not the emperor, but he was in charge of India and He had to solve the problem and the problem was what do you do with? the people of India the Hindu and the Sikhs and the Muslims and he I believe After World War two came up with the idea of a partition. He said we'll put Are you still there? I'm here. I'm listening. He said we'll put the the Hindus and the Sikh over here And we'll create Pakistan and put all the Muslims over there. Is that how it worked? Well, okay I'm not going to pretend to be an expert on the political intrigue that took place at that time as To what led to the partition because tell me about our then it's out. Did Lord Mountbatten's wife bang Nehru That I can confirm with a hundred percent certainty. She was bang. She was banging. No, I'm just kidding Oh Lord Mountbatten Lord Mountbatten's wife was in India and she was banging Nehru Nehru is that really confirmed or that's an absolute truth and Mountbatten was the one who introduced Queen Elizabeth to Prince Philip and The last name of the royal family should be Mountbatten But they went with they went with Windsor Which was like a slap in the face to Lord Mountbatten who had a big influence on Prince Charles and Lord Mountbatten Was killed by the IRA and the police are coming to get us because I know the truth Yeah, I can hear that this is crazy. Okay. Wow. Well, I need to look into this a lot more let me just say that India Pakistan partition obviously is you know is and probably will remain, you know a hot button very sensitive kind of Political sensitivity on both sides and then of course the religious component to it You know makes people even more hypersensitive, but I'll just tell you that I've heard too many Different theories and you know stories behind the stories of what really happened and why did the partition happen? And who wanted it to happen and what were the commercial interests behind it? Etc. Etc. So I I'm just gonna go on this one and say I don't really know what happened I just feel like I feel like I feel about partition kind of the way I feel about 9-11 Like I don't know what really happened, but I know I don't believe the official story But it was an outside job. I Don't know what really had no the partition was an outside job Well, I mean that's the thing there are just theories about you know political intrigue between Johar la Meru and What's his name? You know down bad and found the know the founder of Pakistan Oh my god, this is so embarrassing that there was his What's his they call him? Stan Stan, that's right Stan What is it wise and fall no Stanley wise and fall Stanley wise and thought of course You think they're gonna trust a Muslim Just started there on their own cut you think the you actually think the Pope is Catholic They had to bring a Jew in Do you think wait wait wait, you don't know about bin Laden being Jewish It was Ben Ben lot Benjamin lot it come on you think you think the Saudi Arabians those princes are gonna trust one of their own To pull up something as complicated as 9-11 Originally was 9-12 originally was 9-12 they said for you 9-11 It would have been 9-10, but they're always a daily I Booker booker and jump let's move on for two. I just you said don't even joke about that Well, you know what it is. It's not that I could I could kill us like I could take the joke I'm afraid it's a problem is if people don't get the joke then it get the joke is is out of a context and You know context is everything and so sadly, you know, we say I would say sadly My own I'm gonna I'm gonna tell you about my own self now, you know my own awareness and hyper awareness around You know growing up in Skokie man my whole life I've been around Jewish people and have developed almost kind of like a I'm an honorary member of the tribe, you know, like Nazi jokes Hitler jokes, you know people in our culture I feel like in America oftentimes Without really the proper context will engage in some of these jokes, right? And even if the joke on it, you know, just in itself is a funny joke It's a might be a well-constructed joke, but it's just highly insensitive works done in a way that doesn't Acknowledge, you know the the energy and the feeling the emotion behind it and I've come to the conclusion David that You know context is everything and also intention is everything right Intent of the speaker. What is that called? Is that men's ray? What what what is what men's men's ray, right? In the law, it's sort of the criminal mind the criminal intent. That's more in the criminal context, right? But just a subjective intent of the speaker. What's in their heart when they're saying x y or z? Never gets talked about man in in in in the debacles that happen when comics Do edgy jokes and then end up offending somebody and then turns into a situation and then they're pressed to apologize We never end up discussing or exploring the subjective intent and that's me That's a me. Yeah, but that to me is why censorship is so important and why I'm for censorship Listen the great thing about the great and I'm here. Here's I just By you laughing. I just proved a point I'm about to make and I'm being serious We need censorship because I can say whatever I want on this show and as long as people are laughing it's okay and What's happened is people like Ann Coulter and Rush Limbaugh Will always say when they're caught Saying something horrible. I was joking. I was joking and once they say I Was joking then the intent is Not to hurt but to entertain So I do believe that And I'm being serious Censorship in a civilized society civilized society There's a reason we don't talk a certain way because we might Offend somebody inadvertently. That's why language and I sound so condescending right now to my audience, but Language is important words. We choose are important. That's why we have grammar police. That's why we have dictionaries that's why we have laws and in a civilized society and It used to be this way We don't make racial jokes. We don't make ethnic jokes We don't do that in a civilized polite society because it might offend somebody But as the country gets dumber and dumber the only wit at our disposal is Ethnic humor racial humor and then we wrap it around the First Amendment as though it's something important instead of just plain stupid Well, I mean It's an interesting take. I don't agree that the conclusion of it is we need censorship I think that you might your diagnosis might be on but maybe your your prescription is off well, you know Because we kind of can't tell you why because you know Everything you just said about you know, we don't do that in a civilized society. Well, first of all People do do that. They just do it behind closed doors. That's okay. Okay. That's okay So, okay, so then that so you're saying censorship in the public sphere. We need to limit public speech I'm saying first of all, I don't know if I believe this and that's the danger of people like Ann Coulter and Rush Limbaugh Saying things spitballing running up the flagpole to see if anybody salutes. The problem is I'm just thinking out loud And I shouldn't be thinking and I shouldn't be thinking out loud You should not because because look the the question of censorship, right? This is at the heart. I would say of really what what the whole world is fighting about, you know what does it mean to be a free society and if you Sacrifice one of the most cherished Cornerstones of a free liberal open society, which is free speech By trying to limit what people can say you have literally sort of cut the legs out from underneath the very basis of Why we are a free speech culture. Why we are first-member culture. Now, let me say this though. I agree that Hate speech is a problem But what we have not resolved as a society as a culture and as a civilization is is Hate speech Still free protected speech or not if it's not we have to figure out what constitutes hate speech and That's where the rubber meets the road because it's highly contested ambiguous and Virtually therefore impossible to resolve but a civilized hang on for one second Again I Emotionally, I believe this not intellectually but almost intellectually. I believe this a Civilized society Knows what hate speeches remember the definition of pornography, right? I know it when I see it. I know it when I see it What has happened is the right wing? The conservatives have been hijacked by racists by people who believe Yes, that the Confederacy should have won the Civil War the so-called alt-right. Yes, it's been hijacked and they've turned everything into subjectivity and Everything revolves around the First Amendment a civilized society Has arrived at truths Like slavery is wrong you don't You you don't Persecute Arabs and The Mexicans a civilized society knows what's wrong and what's right and so you can you can know what you can you can you can You can Oppress Arabs in Israel. That's okay Well You're a lawyer, you know, it gets complicated. No, you fight like a woman. You know that you're not a lawyer You know, you let's let's let's start talking about bro This is the conversation that America needs to have there are two Conversations that the alt-right has has forced on America, but you brought up Israel I want to go back to Ann Coulter and the First Amendment. Let's stay. Let's stay on stay in America stay in America Because Mexicans and Arabs you can't oppress Arabs and Mexicans. You can't Know I'm talking about Ann Coulter's right to speak at Berkeley. First of all, she's being paid $20,000 by the CAF and bridge USA So it's not free speech. She's doing it for $20,000. She's doing it To provoke Berkeley what you know of all the places to speak in the Bay Area wide Berkeley she's doing it to to as a cause celeb and It costs $20,000 for her to come on campus and then the protests and then the protection For what purpose to increase the value of her quote-unquote brand Sure, I don't want any part of it and we all know what this is about. It's not a slippery slope She is a vile disgusting pig. She's a racist She justifies oppression of women of Mexicans and Arabs in any civilized society She would be recognized as a as a purveyor of hate speech. What's the debate? Well, I know but I would argue that first of all everything you just said is true You're you're on it. You're on a podcast right now with me saying that she is a vile You know a racist etc. So she is being reviled. The only thing we're arguing is should it be illegal? Should she not should should it be outlawed that she is not allowed to publicly say I'm the I'm the chancellor of Berkeley. Yes. I know we get we get public. It's a public school. I Get it. So the First Amendment is a play here because public funding. Yes, but as I I as a as a As a radio show as a podcast, I'm free to say you're not allowed on my show And that's not a violation of her First Amendment. They're being they're being slippery using the First Amendment because you see Berkeley using Government funds so it's a First Amendment issue, but otherwise it's not a First Amendment issue I mean, look, here's here's what it comes out. I think this I mean, this is a never-ending oceanic Discussion right people have been debating this for hundreds of years and they will continue to debate if probably a very long time But I think that the distinction we need to make is What is the behavior we are interested in trying to regulate as a matter of law? Versus the behavior we're interested in regulating as a matter of just social courtesy Morays norms, etc Everything you said about how a civilized society ought to be, you know, we shouldn't it should not be racist. It should not be, you know Sexist it should not be xenophobic. It should not be anti-semitic. It should not be Anti-immigrant. It should not be Islamophobic. It should not be all of the things that we as civilized people have come to figure out these are all Isms that are destructive to the type of society that we all want that civilized people want I'm arguing that all of those things as bad as they might be ought to be regulated as a matter of social, you know Custom and mores, but they should not be turned into Matters that we want to regulate as a matter of law when it comes to speech, you know You can say racist things, but you cannot but the law will Regulate your your action and not enable you to implement, you know racist policy for example as an employer Or what have you so we have tried though the country We've been trying to figure out how where to draw that line and I would argue that the line is kind of moving That's the part of the problem is you know is I come back to it is hate speech free speech Yes, or no, and if it's not then we have to define it what constitutes hate speech and that's you know Good luck figuring that out. Well, you know, we have to wrap it up and you'll come back And I'll give you the last word and we didn't even touch the surface of Because your introduction was so long money Citizens United yes citizens united they tell us that money is speech if money is speech everything is speech and heckling is speech and Saying to Ann Coulter you can't come on my campus is speech Everything is protected the First Amendment protects everything if money is speech Then I'm free to spend my money any way I want and Ann Coulter is getting $20,000 to speak at Berkeley. She's not being paid by Berkeley She's being paid by right-wing Provocators who could have chosen any place on earth to pay her $20,000 to speak and they they chose Berkeley because Milo, Yappinapolis Try to speak there in February or January and a riot broke out and that's what the right-wing wants to do they want to create a riot on campus in Berkeley and I'm looking at what's going on with the Trump administration and the EPA Being denuded of its regulatory rights, and I'm thinking do I really need to be discussing this cow this bulimic hateful Baron Half-human half-harpy wanting to speak on the campus at Berkeley I thought we destroyed her on the Comedy Central roast. Why is she rearing her ugly butt and Why are we discussing her? I'm so tired. I really feel I'm so tired of this First Amendment argument You know what it is? It's an argument for people who are lazy. It's a lazy argument There's a tax plan That that has to be addressed there. There is a Russian oligarch who is Taking over our election and we're still discussing whether or not and Coulter has the right to speak at Berkeley. Who cares? Yeah, but okay, I can agree with everything you just said but to me It's like the solution to this problem is not that we should therefore censor her It's just we shouldn't talk about it. Let them let them try to be provocateurs Who is who is deciding that this is a new story that is going to end up on the front page of Yahoo news? lazy people like me who lazy people like me who have Trump fatigue and They have to do and I have to do a show. I have to do a show I have to do the show and I'm when I read about the tax plan. I get so depressed The only thing that energizes me is and culture. It's lazy. It's lazy Okay, well then so then that laziness is what we should be banning not not the right to speak I mean, I'm a huge free speech advocate So my argument has always been I became sold on this in law school of fact Which is that the solution to bad speech? Even hateful speech is not less speech It's more speech You don't like a encoder, you know if the right wing and the alt-right are putting all these provocateurs in place And implementing this effective strategy to get more awareness around what they're doing and create, you know situations by by provoking either a riot or a or a negative response by a university which then leads to a new story Where is the counter voice? Where are the people organizing? Speakers on campuses to to refute them to debate these people to you know shame them for the racist that they are Where is that narrative? It's like it's so much easier to call for the banning of a book or the burning of a book than it is to write the counter narrative So I feel like yeah, it is laziness and I'm sort of sick of Social justice warriors that want to complain about how bad the alt-right is and how they're it's like, you know what? They're producing these quack public intellectuals. Where's the countervailing voices? You don't like what they're saying refute them in the public open marketplace of ideas I wish there was more energy put into crafting and articulating convincing counter arguments and counter Figures, then there is put into just you know, rah rah rah Screaming and shouting and yelling and trying to shout down shout down people and in this country They how often are you asked to? appear on mainstream media to give a Rational legal opinion Not very often and yet you're a lawyer and a comedian correct, right Yeah, I mean that there you go. I mean it's Look, you also know this your smart guy all the mass media pretty much You know in the in the United States and really now around the world is just Consistently getting consolidated slowly, but surely into the hands of a handful of conglomerates That own all the film studios all the TV channels all the radio stations all the newspapers all the magazines all the book publishers All the billboard companies. It's in the hands of a few people man. So that the narrative becomes so you know narrow and I'm sure you know the stats. I mean Trump was given over five billion dollars of free advertising free media Well, whose decision was that? It's not the public that's deciding that you know It's because executives that media corporate media entities know that Trump as much as the hateful as hateful as the shit And then he says is he's good for business, you know He when you talk when you when Trump brags about my ratings are great, you know, he's not talking about celebrity apprentice He means when I'm on your channel, you're going to make money He recently you know, he recently said there the ratings have never been as high You know since the towers fell he said that a couple days ago He's comparing himself to 9-eleven That's a real thing It's insane But but that's what it is many. He's these guys are making money man CNN, you know Fox News, etc You know, they all make money off Trump. They air commercials when he when he this weekend He's gonna be doing that Pennsylvania rally While the White House Correspondents dinner is happening. They're all gonna be there Their cameras are gonna be rolling. They're gonna be cutting the commercials and they're gonna be making money So that's also real nobody wants to talk about that the so-called left left-wing you know liberal media The content of what you're saying might be critiquing Trump, but you're still talking about Trump They kill you out of a and spicer and and and like it's just a circus man, right? We're living in a reality show my friend Well, there have to be twists and turns and it's an odd. It's a reality show. It's also this ongoing Perry Mason there's a law and order Factor in that we keep thinking now he's caught. Oh, no, he's not now. He's I mean so absurd because it's like what else what he's already done enough evil shit That should have tanked him the guy is Teflon man He can't he he said it himself I can shoot a guy in the middle of Manhattan and my ratings will go up. It's not It's not Teflon. It's like a document dump when you know it when the White House doesn't want you to find something at the Or in a lawsuit you just pile the opposing council With discovery thousands and thousands of documents they get bogged down going through it and they can't even see the crime There is a document dump going on with Trump in that everybody He surrounds himself with is a criminal. So at what point? You don't even know where to begin to prosecute and that is really how an autocracy Ecliptocracy works. So that's how a Latin American banana Republic works is that Everybody is corrupt, which means that nobody's corrupt Yeah, man, it's so depressing. Yeah, I think I agree with you 100% I mean the other the other benefit of you know, if you know more about just the rest of the world I think that there's a you know the the myth of American exceptionalism that most Americans Either consciously or unconsciously just drink up because you know since you're a kid in this country You're brainwashed into this idea that America's the greatest country in the world America's country in the world And if you really believe it you start to think that no, we're different the rest of the world will operates You know in this very corrupt way, but we're different and Trump is just sort of like the guy who just pulled back the curtain and it was like no, we're not that different We're not that different. Yeah, we do the same thing as everyone else. You know and we accept one indignity after another This is a Country that is ruled like you said by a handful of people and their objective is to suck up as much money as Possible we all think we're convinced. We're a nation of laws until We go through the criminal justice system or the court system or the family law system and you discover now We're a nation of lawyers not laws lawyers And and but here's the thing I don't want to yeah, I don't want to come look here's here's why I've what I've Concluded about this, you know, we all kind of have this ideal in our minds how we wish how we Imagine things ought to be this society of law and order and perfect justice and you know a total meritocracy And everybody is judged up based on the content of their character And you know you get ahead in life because you work hard and you have integrity and that's how the society should work And we imagine that wouldn't it be great if that that we could live in a world like that and that's great That's a wonderful dream, but it nobody gets that that's never existed in human history And so the idea is to maintain that ideal and just keep chipping towards, you know towards it and trying to get Better so I'm saying to you that America is actually, you know far less corrupt in my belief Than certain other societies on the earth and at the same time it is not I don't believe in Blanket, you know unqualified American exceptionalism as though America is just you know above above Above any any any wrong doing, you know our foreign policy. I mean so many Aspects of the way our country is working and especially now it's gotten just more grotesque, you know There's there's always been conflicts of interest being a president But it's never been like this this guy is a multi-billionaire global businessman who are the ones out of one side of their mouth They hate on globalists, you know, it's so funny. I wrote a joke about this like I'll never I will literally go to my grave and never Understanding Trump supporters who would go around saying, you know, we got to do something about these goddamn billionaires You know taking over our country. We got to take our country back. We need goddamn globalist multinational Billionaires, and that's why I'm gonna vote for a It's exactly the guy you hate like it makes absolutely zero rational logical sense, and let me have complaints are valid Let me ask you the wrong guy. Let me ask you this God has a sense of humor history. Oh, yeah, history is funny Yes, what if Donald Trump turns out to be the most Transparent President we've ever had in that in that hang on for one second We know everything about him. Yes. He's in open but except for his taxes. He's pretty much an open book, right? except for his taxes, yeah fair point and I have a feeling the reason he's not Releasing his taxes is it'll be boring Just like he wants to he wants to wave that in front of everybody as a distraction, and there's probably nothing in there I don't really believe that I'm just I have a theory. All right, Bob. That's hypothesizing But let me just say one thing and then you can tell your theory My beloved Barack Obama is Getting $400,000 to speak at Cantor Fitzgerald now Cantor Fitzgerald Was one of the Stock trading firms that was decimated after 9-eleven They have $400,000 to give to Barack Obama. I Would rather that money goes to the first responders the families of the first responders who are still suffering from Breathing in that air but Cantor Fitzgerald Which was almost wiped out after 9-eleven is going to give Barack Obama $400,000 to speak I Love Barack Obama. He's on my team But that doesn't smell right that doesn't smell right for a liberal Democratic president who defeated Hillary Clinton Because she was the one who took the money from Goldman Sachs He should not be taking $400,000 from Cantor Fitzgerald Especially since Cantor Fitzgerald is linked to 9-eleven and they should be giving that money to first responders The point I'm making is Donald Trump Could be the most Transparent president we've ever had because he's just flaunting his corruption and his hypocrisy It's a fair point It's a fair point. I mean he may he may very well be I mean did you see the interview he did with Bill O'Reilly? Right before the Super Bowl where O'Reilly asked him. Do you admire or sorry? So he said do you do you respect Putin? And Trump says yeah, I do, you know, he's a leader of a country this country I respect him and O'Reilly says yeah, but he's a killer You know he's killed people and Trump I swear to God Trump says this he goes You think we're so innocent, right? Right. We got a lot of kill we got a lot of killers. You know Iraq war this that I mean it is stunning to watch a sitting president Basically inditing the United States as being you know as corrupt as any other dictatorship or you know any other Fugged power on the world scene. That's shocking. Yeah, and it's also on the other hand It's sort of like well, he has a point. He has a point in in in Trump's America Even a broken clock is right 20 24 hours a day Is that funny? That's a good flip. I like it I like I like taking like a hacky-sounding old jokes Oh, but I want to give you a theory about the tax return thing. Okay Did you know that when Trump was roasted on Comedy Central? I was there. I wrote it. Okay. Oh, you wrote it So then you know that the one rule What was the one rule that you guys were given you can't joke about is How much he says he's worth. Yeah, let's I'll tell you something else You want to know something else? Of course I did please He was supposed to give all that money to charity and We never found out what the charity was he never proved. This is what I've heard He allegedly never informed us Where that money went? Interesting, so he said the money was going to charity Did you guys pay him in rubles? Listen, you're my new best friend You're my new best friend I'm a big fan of yours. I have a prepared outro But we can't finish right now because we open I hinted at a can of worms and we never finished it I don't want to piss off any of your listeners. What was the can of worms? Well, you know, I said there's two conversations America that Trump winning is forced on America White America needs to have a conversation about the history and legacy of slavery in this country so that white liberals can get over the white guilt and we can have a constructive conversation and Because we know how the right wing feels about slavery. They're like, yeah, let's bring it back but but but I feel like left the left in this country is so Unable to process their white guilt and it's really a hindrance towards making true progress and the second conversation Which is what I hinted at when I said is what I brought up Israel is the fact and I'm saying this is somebody who grew up with Jewish people so this is not coming you think some are you saying some of your best friends or Jews? Is that what you're saying? Yeah, exactly. I'm I'm using a stock line from racist because because America needs to start having a conversation with herself and Jews in America need to help this conversation happen Which is that critique of Israeli? Right-wing violent Zionist policies that are represented by only a fringe radical within Israeli politics Critiquing that is not anti-semitism. Please. Let's stop this nonsense. Okay. Yeah, and we have to wrap it up because this is I have a Muslim on my show who is making sense and he's cogent and convincing and knows what he's talking about so we have to cut you off Fair enough. I understand I do understand. I do understand. I understand how it works. And now you and and you're also Bridging the gap between Jews and Muslims in America that doesn't further the cause of Perpetual debate in order to do one from one men's to another my friend. Yeah, I can't wait On my show, it's a constant debate And if you're talking about what we have in common and our similarities and how we can all work together Towards justice and peace. That's not entertaining. This show has to be about fighting and debating and arguing and name-calling So we have also a member of ISIS. We didn't Get to So and now but but here I have my standard Closing is this because this makes me sound good. Okay, because I'm Jewish and you're a Muslim. Yes, sir. Ready No, I'm not gonna do it. I'm not gonna call you my brother. I'm not gonna say brother I'm not gonna call you my brother. I was gonna call. I'm gonna call you my sister Fair enough fair enough. I'm just a construct. All right. Let me let me just wrap this up But this is the part I got this down by the numbers I've been doing this for so long now I start calling you my brother because then it endears me to you and the audience and I sound Very, you know, like I'm all about peace brother. Okay, brother Sounds good brother. Okay, brother. So brother tomorrow night. We shall watch the White House Correspondence then my brother Hassan Minaj will be Telling jokes to my brothers at the White House Correspondence Center, right brother. I think that's right I think there might be some sisters there and maybe some people who are Them right brother and brother. Where can people see you do comedy brother? brother, I stand-up sets In at the cellar in Manhattan this week and I am a base out of Chicago I have a monthly show called in polite company a political comedy show about race for Religion of politics at the Chicago Laugh Factory every month the people can check all that out on my website Which is Oz are calm a z h a r dot com brother. Can you spell your full name brother? I? Will brother it's called d a v i d f e l d m a n. That's my name brother. Oh my god We're so close. I sometimes I know Name is spelled Oz hard a z isn't zebra h a r Dot com and brother. How do people follow you on Facebook and Twitter? The links are actually on that website Twitter handle is just my full name Oz hard Usman a z h a r us man, it's like us man and They can just search my name on Facebook and find the fan page as well Hey, brother man, let's do the bit that we talked about doing at the top of the show brother Sounds good brother. They'll do the bit What bit what about why you're on Skype? What about why I'm on Skype? Why are we doing this interview on Skype? Oh, yeah, right? Well, you know, I reached out to you let you know, I was back in Manhattan. Yeah, we had been trying to get this thing scheduled That's right brother. So given that I'm in New York. I said, hey man, let's do it And you said I can't be in the same room as you so let's do it over Skype That's pretty much the way it went down, right? Right brother. I mean you understand brother there. I Brother I get it who you're talking to you're in you're in the room next door You know Definitation is required But you understand brother you understand that even though we're different You understand where I'm coming from where I cannot be in the same room with you I get it. I do understand. I mean even though you're next door We have to do it. Yeah Skype brother because you respect my values brother, right? 100% yeah, and you got to be careful who you're seen with you know, I mean and I picture with me and I say, you know They're watching, you know, it's Sir, I'm just letting you know by the way coming on your shot. You've been added to probably a few lists Okay, brother, but by the way, if we run into each other in the hall brother I Don't make eye contact brother and I and I don't want to ride in the same elevator with your brother You understand where I'm coming from brother, don't you? I'm hoping that the brother bit is to hold it out I'm hoping your listeners are like why Why hey, how long you in town brother? Well, brother, I don't even know at the moment. I'm either flying home tomorrow or I'm here for another few days Okay, I might get a gig in Long Island or whatever. Okay. I would have coffee with your brother But we'll have to do this guy You understand brother No, we should have dinner sometime. Let's just make sure we do it over Google. I love you. Thank you Hey Felden, but thanks for having me. Thanks for doing man. Thank you, sir. Bye