 Marriage, as they say, is the only institution that you're not supposed to graduate from. It is a lifelong commitment, hence you ought to be fully aware of what it entails, as well as prepare for it before going into it, to void separation. In this video, I will be sharing with you nine signs that you are ready for marriage. 1. You are psychologically mature While no one can tell you what age is best to get married, there may be an optimum level of maturity, psychologically speaking, which one must attain before venturing into marriage. But how do you measure your level of maturity? Are you of the opinion that age has nothing to do with maturity? Guess what? Even though a lot of people hold onto the popular demand that age is nothing but a number, research has shown that age indeed contributes to maturity. According to Noah Kleiman, clinical director of NYC Cognitive Therapy, the brain isn't fully developed until age 27, particularly the part of the brain associated with the ability to assess long-term consequences and weigh options. Dr. Kleiman, further advice that don't get married until you are working with a full, complete brain. 2. You accept conflict and do it constructively How do you react to conflict? Confrontation? Disappointment? Are you an avoider or do you attack? An anonymous writer once wrote that the first step of fear-fighting is to take a step back and reflect on yourself. Another thing to note is that if your date in life is filled with stress and drama, it will not get better after you get married. The consequences and jeopardy only increase. These are essential realizations to make before tying the knot since conflict is necessary for a relationship. And when done right, it can even be constructive. Thus, you must check your ability to respond to criticisms and also accept constructive feedback. Every relationship experiences disagreements and the goal of conflict is mutual understanding. When you dialogue about a problem, you both feel heard and understood. But then again, there are things you should never say to your partner if you want to thrash things out in a healthy way. When you learn to avoid criticism, contempt and defensiveness, which are patterns of communication that predict divorce, then you are ready to settle down. 3. You confidently know yourself Ask yourself, do I feel settled in my own life and truly understand who I am as a person? If the answer is yes or pretty close, then you are good to go. In order for a marriage to last, both parties have to understand each other. But how do you start to understand someone else when you don't confidently know who you are? So the first step to understanding your partner is first to have an awareness of who you are indeed. Kimberly Henshenson, a therapist who works with couples in New York City, explains that feeling secure with oneself leads to more security in marriage. However, if it takes until later in life to achieve self-awareness, it is okay. But a successful marriage is more likely if both partners feel secure about themselves independently and can work as a team moving forward. 4. You can easily say, I'm sorry It can be so simple, yet why is it so hard for many individuals to say I'm sorry? The sad truth is that as common as the word sorry may be, if you cannot say it, you may be destined for divorce if you decide to marry anyway. That's the reality. People believe that apologizing gives away their power and makes them feel weak and vulnerable. But if you think deeply about it, you will realize that it is quite the opposite. Often saying I'm sorry even when you are not wrong shows wisdom and can savage terrible situations, whereas always claiming to be right only causes distance and friction, the opposite of love, affection and fun that you truly desire. When you can truthfully and authentically say I'm sorry, you'll have a skill that's needed in a long-term marriage. 5. You already feel like a complete individual Have you ever said or heard someone saying that they want to marry someone who completes them? While this statement has become a normal one among individuals, it is not the same as being prepared. Being ready for marriage doesn't mean that you've decided you need your partner. It means that you realize you are a complete, unique, particular individual all on your own and that you want your partner to complement you, not that you need your partner to complete you. Marriage is not the common together of two incomplete people who are looking for someone to complete them. It is the union between two complete individuals who have seen that their partners complements them and together with their companion, they can achieve more remarkable feats. When you are ready for marriage, you won't feel a desperate need to get married, so you feel whole. You'll feel happy you've found your person. 6. You know you are compatible with your partner Yes, you should get to know each other before saying I do. It's a step that comes only with time and intimate conversation. But believe it or not, it is often missed by couples who aren't completely honest with each other or themselves and instead get caught up in the wedding whirlwind. Sadly, just as they rush into the marriage, that is how they run out because in time, they were realized that they were both incompatible. However, knowing and accepting each other's inner hopes, dreams, stresses and annoyances can help you weigh in on some severe compatibility factors before going to the altar. Once you feel you have both clearly articulated your desires, wants, needs, likes, dislikes, hopes, dreams and non-negotiable and correlated them with that of your partner, you could be ready to take that significant next step in your relationship. Else, emotional and physical triggers can wreak havoc if these things are not sorted before marriage. 7. You are not insecure Jealousy isn't an attractive trait Many people believe that if your partner is jealous of you, then it shows that they genuinely love you. But that narrative is wrong. Jealousy is not equivalent to love. Indeed, everyone gets jealous from time to time, but people react differently to their feelings. While some individuals will remain calm, some others will resort to having an outburst. Well, the latter reaction usually escalates issues. Rather than throw tantrums, it is better to communicate your insecurities to your partner. You may surprise yourself because even if you had been a jealous person before, your soulmate would make you feel like you are the only thing that matters, and you would need jealousy in your life anymore. You'll feel secure within yourself. 8. You are financially independent One factor that causes divorce in the world today is finance. Before getting into a union, you must not only be psychologically and emotionally prepared, you also have to be financially balanced. Although it is not necessarily to be economically secure before marriage, you should have passed the phase of total dependence and also crafted an idea of where each of your finances stands before making a legal commitment to each other. Marriage therapist Kimberly Henshenson suggests that finances should be openly discussed before marriage. Suggestions should include any debt either of you has, whether each partner is expected to contribute to paying debt obtained before the wedding, how much income you make, whether you will have separate or joint accounts, how you will handle bills, and your beliefs about savings. In Kimberly's words, owing money or not having a high-paying job and not signs you aren't ready for marriage, but how you handle finances and whether that's compatible with your partner's views matters. So conclusively, a person who is ready for marriage understands their financial stance and that of their partner. 9. You can envision yourself getting married It might seem like common sense, but it's worth it to check it with yourself to see if marriage is truly something you imagine in your future. In society today, especially in the African region, whether or not a person is ready to get married is determined by their age or achievements. For instance, when a lady acquires her first degree, she is forced to get married instead of continuing her education because men do not like women who are too educated. Many individuals who get into marriage do not do so because it is what they want for themselves, but they give in to the pressure from society, family and friends. People fail to understand that a marriage that will last is one where both parties are sure that marriage is what they want at that point in their life. If you sit down and ask yourself what your goals are for the next five years, is marriage on your list? If yes, then you are ready. But if you do not see yourself getting married, then you should not. Career and self-discovery are essential aspects of life and if they are priorities, take an immediate precedence, then the focus should be on those areas of your life. If you can identify these signs for yourself as you are considering time or not, then you are on a beautiful path. Being confident that you feel ready for this lifelong commitment, marriage will give you an excellent chance of living happily ever after with a partner. If you are one of our great fans who have been wanting to know who is behind this channel, now you can know. Kindly check the description box to join Steve Courage's personal channel. Learn directly from him or ask him any questions. Thanks!