 Hi Hi Hey, it's Bridget. Welcome to Sunday morning coffee with Bridget. I'm actually recording this one This will not be a live stream because I actually have clients tomorrow on Sunday morning and Afternoon, I'm trying to catch up. You can probably tell I sound a little bit nasally. I apologize if you're listening on your AirPods might want to skip this one and listen to a previous Sunday morning coffee on the playlist If that bugs you, sorry So It's been about a week. I've had like a little viral thing. It's getting better. Actually. I just sound nasally now, but I'm starting to feel better. So that's a good thing, but So I wanted to have coffee with you this morning I wanted to make sure we didn't miss our coffee date, you know, because last week I I recorded it early also and I did a little video a little audio no video. And so I miss you guys I miss you and Last weekend I was kind of in a rush Actually trying to get home early because I wasn't feeling well and I needed to come home and just Not be far away, you know, I just oh, I just needed to get home before I got too sick I didn't want to make other people sick. Oh So So I missed you. I missed you. There's so much. There's been so much happening and so much not happening. It's kind of that Strange place. In fact, I've been talking to one of my very psychic friends and she and I have been having kind of a similar scenario Situation like feeling it's like We're just in this weird spot and I know that astrologically there was some stuff pushing through this week and There's some talk about like Saturn return or what have you I don't know astrology. I don't speak astrology I just talk energy. So you probably know more about the astrological stuff than I do but There's definitely some things that are affecting all of us and then the week of my birthday there was a whole bunch of stuff that happened to like earthquakes and Then all the stuff with like the US skies and like things being like Detected in the atmosphere and like subsequently taking out, you know, kind of things. So there's been a lot It's been happening and then also absolutely nothing because like I've been sick, right? So It's kind of a strange a Strange way of things. So This Sunday morning coffee. I want to talk a little bit about What does it mean? What does it mean? I'm thinking about aging I'm thinking about life. I'm thinking about having this very odd perspective that I have Now I was really excited to turn 50 and I've always been excited for that I think it's so much fun. In fact, I have my margaritaville shirt on you should see the back It's awesome. You should see the back. What is it back? Can you see the back? Can you see the back kind of? Yes, my sister bought it for me It was fun Went to a city walk I've never actually been to Universal Studios in Orlando and so we just went to the city walk and had dinner and stuff So that was the first time I ever did that But so turning 50 I wanted to you know, do some different things. I even actually I was an ebacot on my birthday Which is what I wanted. I mean come on. I wanted to be there, of course and I Went on Sorin like I don't do heights. Hi. It freaks me out It's like your legs are just dangling and my my sister's like, oh What did you want to go on Sorin or whatever? I'm like Dude, are you kidding me right now? Like do I want to die on my 50th birthday? Die of total fear and consumed by my own anxiety. Yeah, that sounds like so much fun but I Was like, you know what? Yeah I want to face my fears This is something simple based upon the past stuff that I have been dealing with over the last year and a half Going on a ride where I'm scared of being like like fear of heights and stuff and it's gonna make me anxious or sweaty So what? Whatever like not a problem Like your perspective totally changes, you know, and you're dealing with a lot of stuff and live in a lot of life, right? and so After my birthday I Had and then I got to watch the sunrise intentionally and I did post that you've probably seen that on my Instagram and stuff and I actually did a live stream on Facebook Bridget inspired that would have been a February 8th or 9th I think it was 8th. Yeah my birthday morning, but So the days I after my birthday I really wanted to see the sunrise because I love the sunrise. It's such a special time for me and so I Recorded that a couple of days two days in a row. Actually, I did it. That was great and It just makes me happy to just feel that freshness that renewal that possibility in a new day and the colors are gorgeous in Florida God, yes, they're beautiful and so I Was in those moments and I was kind of receiving the new day and I was having this Awareness that has come to my mind before Okay, so you all know that part of the reason why I share as a psychic and a medium is because my dad died Okay, that was what really woke me up two years after his death is when I had this massive floodgate opening experience of Realizing that I was psychic and I just thought it was normal like oh my god, that's the normal and So I've had The contemplation before that my dad died young he was 52 when he died and I Was trying to think about if I remembered him turning 50 like a big party or anything. I don't really remember a big party or anything like that and I have thought about what would I do if I knew that I only had two years left Like I'm 50 now What if I if I knew that I only had two years? How would and I know people have asked this before life coaches have asked this How would you live your life differently? What would you do differently? And it's not even that it's this It's different than that it's this Moment of realization that I have had a really good life like overall, okay, I Oh, I have had multiple lifetimes in one life. I have four Incredible people that I call my kids that I brought into the world and gifted to the world, right and I have I've been I've had two marriages. I have had opportunities to travel around the United States primarily To be to create really wonderful memories with my family and my friends and at my happiest place on earth and Disney World I've had opportunities for different kinds of jobs I've had opportunities for education and continuing education Informal structures like in universities and graduate school and also Just in learning and development in general, you know And I've had people in my life that have supported me and loved me and to the best of their ability You know and as I've grown and evolved and changed then those people have also changed in my life And my relationships have changed and that's pretty much what the last year and a half has been My primary relationships have My primary relationship has very much changed and so feeling into Like what's next now? You know, I feel like So I'm gonna use a lot of words here ready lucky grateful appreciative Supported up to this point in my life Even though there are times and moments mental health wise that I have been Challenged in the last couple of years like I have been drugged down to the depths of the darkness. I have been in the dark And It has surprised me how dark things have gotten at times for me Scary surprise not Oh, no very scary Um And at the same time I have this incredible awareness of This life that I've had I've had 50 years here Damn And so if I did die in two years if I was gone in two years I would consider it accomplished check check Yes And instead of it's kind of interesting. Um, so I decided to create a list of 50 things that I want to do experience Or connect with in this next year from now until I turn 51 And some of it is really simple things like Really simple things that you wouldn't you'd be like, what? Um, I'm not gonna share that list with you yet because it's not it's not complete I just started it. I got like five things on there But it's not things you necessarily expect like some math I mean, there's some massive stuff on there too, but like it's not like, oh my gosh I have to see the world and oh my gosh I have to do x y and c before I you know I just I have to do this and then I don't feel a sense of urgency or a rush I feel this incredible gift of the time the gift of Of the the awareness. I'm just gonna keep saying the word awareness because that's how it feels is that Oh my gosh, when there is awareness, there's choice. We have choice We've choice And that doesn't mean easy choice is not the same as easy that those two things are not synonyms easy and choice Oh, usually it's the opposite choice challenging You know for all sorts of reasons, right? and I feel this And there are lots of different layers to this. It's not all just like this. Oh, I feel so good. It's not that it's I feel Just incredibly blessed truly blessed to be able to have had this life that I've had And so the next 30 years what's what's going to be ahead of me I don't feel like there's things I haven't necessarily done That I need to do I don't feel like I used to feel really driven like to leave a legacy and and I do want to have an impact and and And that is not by namesake or some kind of somebody's going to know I existed It's more like I want to be able to Be Be able to bring hope Be able to bring encouragement and support to people who don't necessarily have that and the people that do have that To bump them up to that next level of then They can be more fully themselves and then when they are fully themselves, we are fully ourselves then we can give more To society to humanity to the people we love to our kids We get more we have more energy then we can get more involved in in social justice causes we can Write beautiful poetry books like this one that I have right here that inspire people or help heal people in their times of need or struggle or Give a child an opportunity to dream a little bigger because They saw somebody doing something or somebody wrote something or somebody shared something on youtube that really touched them When they didn't maybe have a parent figure or anybody else to encourage them They got inspired by you because I was able to help encourage you and support you and give you hope Do you see and I won't necessarily know that impact and I'm totally okay with that I am so okay with that. I don't need to know And that's different than how I felt before That's different. I don't need to know I just have faith that That's going to happen that by me Encouraging supporting inspiring you that you will then have something that you need Maybe it's vitamins. Maybe I'm your protein shake for the day, you know Maybe I'm the voice on a really lonely night That gives you a perspective So that you don't fall into that spiral of self-hate or self-loathing and so you don't take a drink So instead You actually get some rest And you start again tomorrow Like that That's really what I want That's what I would want to do for the next two years I would get on youtube every goddamn day And I'd be talking to people and I'd be I'd be showing up on different podcasts I'd be doing all sorts of things like that just to talk and to share and to encourage and to support this energy of Love because that's what is possible And it's not love in a tangible form like look here's my girlfriend or look here's my my New baby it's not that it's This incredible embodiment of love in the waves and the the rainbow of colors that it is and Possibility is one of those huge components of what love is and to me it's hope So that's what I would do I wouldn't worry about money. I wouldn't worry about my kids figuring their way in the world I would just instill so much hope and inspire them So that they would know that when I was gone that they would be okay And that I would always They would always be able to watch a video or something or listen to an audio That would encourage them, you know, like that. That's what I would want And I have had some scares this year. My health hasn't been Quite the best because of the stress and so I'm working on that I have a deeper commitment to myself to truly care about my physical body and to allow myself to relearn how to let my body feel Because it's been so overloaded with feeling, you know and processing emotion And so I'm trying to come into new relationship with my body so that it is not Just this feeling processing center that it is much more of a peaceful beautiful low place for me and Yeah, because it's really taking it's really taken it's toll the last year and a half. Yeah So That perspective of oh my god, I wonder what would my dad have done, you know, would he have come out like I wonder about that The answer to that I know is no So my dad if you don't know the story my dad Um Died of AIDS and so he was gay. He actually caught AIDS from having unprotected sex um and He chose to Not share anything about that part of his life with us as his family and stuff And grew up in a very different time, you know the stonewall time. Yeah, my dad was like young then, right? Like he was, you know a young adult then and so it was totally different and So there's no judgment. I don't have judgment for my dad. I used to I used to be really angry about it I'm like, why would you just die instead of tell us who you are? You know and so I feel like The choices that we make Are um are a really big deal They show who we are And if you feel like you mess up or you make a bad choice or whatever you're judging yourself for or other people are judging you for Then course correct Make a different choice change your mind Do something different change Just change do something different But do not put yourself in a box to please other people Do not live out or continue to live out the rest of your days Trying to be something for somebody else so that they will love you Because when you do that You don't love you And that's what we need When the BLs say all we need is love It means we need to know ourselves We need to be on our own side And it's not us against the other people in our lives. It is not a conflict a fight against us and other people It's the inner conflict within ourselves We get to love ourselves and then have the capacity to love others. It has to work that way. It's exponential And when you don't source or you're not plugged in from inside and you're loving out here and trying to get all this stuff Right by being this person and trying to hold your bad parts back from people In relationship when you're in relationship with people It doesn't work It doesn't work because eventually you start to not like yourself more and more and more and you go down down down down down into this More judgment self loathing self hates self disapproval all of that You you good. You are the one that is making it worse for yourself because You are not here you are here instead So if I knew that I only had two years to live I would love myself in such a way that Every time doubts knock in because it does I get it too. I get all this stuff I get the judgment. I get the worthiness questions. I get all that stuff. I get all of it I get really low stuff like imposter syndrome. Who do I think I am and like this You know Why would people need to listen to me? Why you know, how am I so special? I'm not that special All of those things, you know, it's gonna happen. You're gonna have that but If I had two years I would love relentlessly I would love people hard and I wouldn't let them go even if they wanted to go I'd be like you can go but I'm still gonna love you I'm still gonna be here loving on you Even if you're not loving on me back because I wouldn't need the back Do you see them saying like I wouldn't need it back like there wouldn't be this commodity of love exchange Or attention exchanged. There wouldn't be that I'm just gonna choose to love who I want to love how I want to love them Regardless of whether they love me back or not Because that fills my heart to know That there is love And it looks really different in all my relationships and that's okay And other people don't have to understand it. Even the people I'm loving They don't have to understand how I love for me to love them So for the next 30 years, I just want to be Beaming Hope and encouragement and inspiration. I want to talk I want to use my voice as long and hard as I can I want to talk to people I want to connect with people I want to love through my words through my presence That's what I want That's what I would do honestly. That's what I would do Every opportunity I would do that so That's your Sunday morning coffee with Bridget I hope you've enjoyed it I'm enjoying the sunshine right now On this new day One day at a time Two days ago. I sure as heck did not feel like this There will be up days sunny days and there will be cloudy Depressing days and sometimes they last and they linger And that that can be hard. I know but We have Sunday morning coffee and we have a playlist So make sure you use that use the resources that you have Available and accessible to you use your tools like tapping EFT like reading a great poetry book. Oh my gosh. I love this book Like writing and journaling like walking going on a walk like spending time in nature Like calling up a friend you haven't talked to for a while like having coffee with somebody There's all sorts of ways you can Be connected And move with energy. I hope that I've inspired your spirit Filled you with hope And been encouraging to you today to live your life. It's your life after all and you get to live it my friends Just live it