 You can achieve things like those ideals, which we'll get into in a little bit of self-acceptance, self-awareness, real principles that you can live by. You can have affairs of people sexually in any realm. And we heard a lot of speakers talk about this, really an awesome convention for that, where if you're meeting somebody for that night, if you're meeting somebody and being sexually aggressive, if you're being a little bit dominant, if you're being in a relationship. You know, if you're doing something where you're trying to, you know, have kids or be married or whatever. There's no judgment in that. The deal is, is that in this area, it can always hit a good spot, all right? The key to it, where it becomes that aspect of violence, that aspect of conflict, is when this side disrespects this side, okay? So, for instance, last night we were, we had a few questions and a guy was talking about, because I said, man, seduction has to always. One of the biggest flaws. And the leadership in the seduction community has no true master, just like in fighting there are actually legitimate people who can represent it. And it's hard to find those people in the industry. And so you hit a lot of gray area when you hear people talking about seduction and you were saying, man, you know, you're saying that in order to seduce, it has to have these principles of openness, exchange, and actually loving women and exchange with them, whatever levels. And he was, this guy was saying, he's like, man, don't you need to detach from that? And it's okay to be a little bit pissed off. And it's okay to be a little bit like, you know, not into him and I'm like, no, no, no, no. Like that, that's, if you have that, you need to be honest with it and kind of like deal with that sort of stuff. And that was definitely an issue for myself. But at the same time, don't think you can't hit certain ideals. You know, a technique is very, very different than a mentality. And so you've got to put that into application, detach yourself a little bit from it. The problem is, is this, when we are not respecting each side, we're trying to control, we're trying to dominate, we're trying to overpower. And a perfect example of this, in terms of seduction, I'm escalating, escalating, escalating. It's a good thing, you know, I'm turned on, she's turned on, she says, stop, I disrespect that and keep going, you know. And there's times where, in our minds, we have to know that a part of the process of seduction is some resistance. But guys, you know, like if a girl is truly saying no, she's truly saying no, you know, but if she's afraid, if she's speaking with a little bit of doubt, that's a little bit different, you know. In fighting, perfect example, I'll actually bring this up, kind of controversial, but I'll have a lot of female friends, right? A lot of female friends and they'll tell me, you know what, I hate having abusive relationships, you know, or I hate abusive men, they're such assholes. And so I'm like, oh man, so you are somebody who puts yourself in a place, like usually when that's said, it's somebody that has experienced a lot of those things, that's why they're bringing it up. And I say, so what, you know, what are you talking about? Well, men do this and men do that and I'll say, well, what's the difference? Are you starting fights with them and losing or are you actually saying no, stop and they continue? Okay, so there's a difference between a fight where it's an exchange and when somebody is saying no, stop and that side continues. When that happens, that's when we hit to that level of violence. Another example in terms of seduction, everybody, I mean, I love sex, I love having sex in lots of different ways. I've experimented with a lot of crazy shit and one of the things with having so much, kind of, you know, anger, confusion or whatever that had to do with my sexuality, that means my identity is a sexual being and how I acted out on it was that I would have sex with people and whether I'd watch porn or a woman would tell me something and she'd say, spank me or choke me and I'd be like, oh man, women like to be dominated and abused or whatever. No, no, much different. It's serving the exchange. Yes, there may be times where there's dominance, you might be like, you know, choking them and you could choke them lightly, it works that way, it's more of the effect of it. You could be fucking them hard, they might say, spit on me, spit on my mouth, whatever, that those aren't acts of violence. When we confuse the two of those and we don't hold onto the idea of exchange, we kind of pollute and pervert the ideas of sexuality. This is actually an interesting story where I learned this was, actually where I got a lot of this was like my buddies who were in the porn industry, it's one of the guys, Eric Everard's birthday today, happy birthday. But they would explain to me, they're like, man, like it's not about hating women, I thought the same thing, you know, it's about loving women and women love this and this is how I do it and you've gotta get that or else it'll just go in this circle. You know, it's kind of like Mark was talking about North-South, trying to do both things at once, it's not gonna work, it's gonna conflict and then there's only gonna hit confusion. But the deal was, it's a fucked up story. It was Christmas Eve and I was hooking up with a girl, this was, God man, years ago, I was hooking up with a girl and I was really trying, hadn't had sex and I really wanted to and whatever and we're hooking up and she bites my lip and she bites my lip and it like hurts and when you bite, you can't really talk and I'm like, oh yeah, you wanna be rough so I rough her up back, right? And she bites harder and then I'm like, all right, okay, you know, and then I'm like, okay, stop, stop and she starts laughing with my lip in her mouth and I'm like, oh fuck and she bites harder and I had to start like, you know, you can't do anything because you can't push somebody away but I start trying to give her some discomfort and choker or whatever to get her off with my arms and eventually she stops. Anyway, stupid me continues to have sex with her and what was so interesting is when I was having sex with her, I'm exchanging, right? I'm exchanging, I'm getting turned on, it's a little bit rough and what was so weird and odd about this, I started to get more and more turned on and that sexual vibe and as soon as that happened she acted out violently and the big difference wasn't like slaps, it wasn't like, you know, hit me, it was like gouging at my face, biting my face, dude, and idiot me, I continue on with it, I was black and blue Christmas, it was like totally fucked up but that was the difference. It's totally fucked up, man, it's totally fucked up. I mean, oh, it was retard and everybody's like, what happened? I'm like, well, like why didn't you just leave? I'm like, yeah, because I thought I could, you know, somehow control this thing. It really made me believe in like demonic possession too but anyway, the thing was, that to me was the definition of violence and what would happen is, is when she would hit me and like closed fist or whatever and I remember her going like, okay, this is not cool and she's like, you pussy. I never thought this would come from you and like she really wanted to be fucked up, she wanted to be heard. I could not sustain an erection, I wasn't turned on as soon as that would happen and I kept trying to go back and work some level of seduction but that was the difference for me which really showed me, wait a minute, wait a minute. You know, when I'm pulling a girl's hair, when I'm doing something which might be a little bit aggressive, when I'm doing something that might even be like a little bit degrading or it can exchange both ways, you can do it to me. It's an exchange, it's serving what we like, it's serving into this type of physical pleasure that we are joined together and it's dependent upon that. So, what else did I write? When we are not having sex, when we are not in full function of our physical beings in life and constant motion and anything like that, whether it is we are training for fighting or we're training for seduction or we're working for diet or we're working for bodybuilding, whatever the hell it is, if we are not fully in that action like that diagram before, we will hit levels of dysfunction and there's a whole bunch of these things but we'll hit anger, we'll hit frustration, we'll hit isolation and alienation, two different things. This is I choose to be by myself and not partake. This is that I push people away and blame other people. I get depressed, I'll be afraid, I'll hit guilt and shame and a lot of these things we talked about are internal defects. That means it doesn't matter what I start putting in my life, it'll go through the filters of guilt and shame and judgment and all that sort of stuff and I will ultimately isolate alienate myself from a bunch of people. Now, in seduction,