 Hello, I am Narc Survivor, welcome to my YouTube channel. Before I begin please hit that thumbs up button down below. Hit subscribe and click all notifications to be notified when I upload a new video. And if you would like to bug a one-on-one coaching session with me, just go to my website, it is Narc Survivor.co.uk. Is the Narcissist happy with someone else? When you see the Narcissist flaunting their new source on social media, it looks like they're happy, it looks like they're having a great time without you, but it's very easy for them to orchestrate a situation and make it look like it's something it's not. Because you don't see what they're going through in their everyday lives, all you see is this snapshot, this highlight, this moment and everything else is left to your imagination. You don't see what is going on behind closed doors, so it adds a lot of suspense and mystery which creates uncertainty about what may happen. Unless of course you understand that inner workings are a Narcissist mind, because that reveals exactly how they are feeling inside, but this can be said for anyone. Because happiness is an internal feeling, people can laugh and smile but that doesn't actually mean that they are happy. And even if they are happy they could just be happy for a moment and then for the rest of the day they might be unhappy and you wouldn't even know. Discontentment and dissatisfaction is something that everyone experiences from time to time. And major depressive disorder and anxiety disorders are the two most common mental health disorders in the world. So a lot of people in this world are not happy, but could this not be the case for narcissists? Because sometimes they are able to show it externally and it can appear as though they are happy, especially when they are love bombing their target. Because they like to show everyone that they're with this new person and how there's so much better off without you. But just because that's what you're seeing, it doesn't mean it's real. One minute you were with the Narcissist and then they disappeared without a trace. There were nowhere to be found and they didn't give you any closure. They didn't give you a reason or an explanation for why they left. Or maybe you left them but you couldn't deal with them anymore. They were too toxic and abusive, which all just reveals that they weren't able to participate in moral and acceptable behavior. It reveals that they lacked kindness and good will and that they were not polite or honest. So they weren't good enough. They were inadequate because they weren't about making the relationship work. It was just all about them. It was about what was good for them and not about what was good for you. So they were just using you as a tool. They were just screwing you over instead of giving you the respect that you deserve. Which is why they manipulated, lied and gaslighted you because they're not about stability, predictability or progression. They don't like it when things are steady and unchanging because they're mentally unstable. They don't like it when things can be declared in advance because their feelings can change from one moment to the next. And they don't like it when the relationship progresses because they know they're going to be left behind because they have a mental disorder which is characterised by a state of unhappiness, dissatisfaction and confusion. So how could they ever commit to a relationship with you? Someone who is the exact opposite of them. Someone who values commitment. Someone who likes stability, predictability and progression. Clearly that was a recipe for disaster because you both value different things. But they can make it seem like they're so much happier in their new relationship and they can make you feel like you're not worth anything because you gave them everything. So you assume that it's you. You assume that you must have done something wrong. You assume that you should have done something differently. But that's just what they want you to believe. What the reality is that they have problems with interpersonal relationships. They can't thrive on equitable and reciprocal compromises. If something is fair and reasonable and it gives equal treatment to both partners involved, the narcissist won't be able to survive in that type of environment because narcissists are not built to last or survive, which is why they always need a source of supply rather than an equal and reciprocal relationship. Because otherwise they would die very quickly. They would become extinct because they're not self-sustaining. They're like leeches or parasites. They're bottom feeders. So they have to use and exploit other people's troubles and weaknesses. Otherwise they would cease to exist. There wouldn't be any narcissist on this earth, which is why they can't be in a relationship. They can only ever have a source of supply. When you're listening to them and doing exactly what they say, and you're continuously under their power and influence, because otherwise they would become forceful and violent, because they would feel like they're resisting attack, which is why you're never going to be working as a team. They will only ever view you as they're subordinate and everything will be about them. But then you may wonder that if narcissists really are that fragile and weak, and if they're not built to last or survive, then how can they move on and live their best lives? But it's actually all an illusion. It's a deceptive appearance and impression. They've implanted false ideas and beliefs in your mind. Because remember how things were when you first met them. They were mirroring you to create a sense of trust and connection so that they could get their narcissistic supply. They were love bombing you and you thought that you had met the one. You thought that you had met your soulmate. But if that was real, then they would still be with you now. So that's how you know that it was all an illusion. And yet now you see them with a new source and it looks like they're having such a great time. Maybe they just bought a new house together or they're going on vacation. And it's like everything you ever wanted. You wish that they had done that for you. But if you knew exactly what was going on and what they get themselves into, you would be glad that you got out when you did. You really just dodged a bullet. You managed to avoid a difficult and undesirable situation because they are never going to be able to sustain it. They just repeat the same cycle of abuse again and again. The only thing that has changed is the person they're doing it to. They've just replaced you with someone else. So they're going to do the same thing they did with you with this new person. They're not going to have a healthy relationship because they haven't done the same thing again at work. So they haven't developed any awareness of anything. Instead all they've done is blame you. They probably started a smear campaign against you. And they didn't give you any closure. Which is very unhealthy behavior. Because they haven't even considered that their actions have hurt you. Or that they need to make amends with you. That probably never even crossed their minds. Which is why they didn't come back to apologize. Because they thought they could just move on into another relationship. And then everything would be okay. While you're overwhelmed by grief and disappointment. You're brokenhearted. You're very sad and upset after what had happened to you. And then they moved on after just a few days or weeks. Because they divide people into sections or categories. They separate them into different groups. And they do not allow those groups to mix together. Which means that they do not have a stable sense of self. Because they've got different characteristics that they reveal to you. Compared to what they reveal to someone else. So they were one type of person with you. And then after that's done and dusted. They go and step into a new situation. And take on a completely different character. As though they had no connection to what happened before. Which means that they can never be happy. Because they're disconnected from themselves and their emotions. They don't even know who they are. While happiness is a sense of purpose and well-being. It's a sense of an abiding intention. To achieve a long-term goal. That is personally meaningful. And makes a positive mark on the world. While providing them with a state of comfort and good health. Narcissists are the furthest thing from comfort and good health. They're chaotic and disorderly. There's no structure to their lives. And the last thing they care about is making a positive mark on the world. They strive to cause adverse effects and consequences. And they feel no concern about it. So how could they ever be happy? They cannot contain positive emotions. So they're never going to experience consistent happiness. And even if they could. It wouldn't feel comfortable for them. Which is why whenever you're trying to share a positive or uplifting experience with them. They will turn away from it. Or they will seek to destroy it. Because not only do they hate your happiness. But they even hate their own. It scares them. Because vulnerability is the key to unlocking true happiness. And narcissists can't be vulnerable. If a narcissist was to be vulnerable. That would be the beginning stages of their healing journey. But they can't because they fear rejection and exposure. They can't even expose themselves to themselves. And instead they live in denial. And they create an alternate reality. So they're never going to experience happiness. And they're never going to connect to another human being. Because that requires vulnerability as well. So instead they will live the rest of their lives in a present of their own making. Because they can't connect to you or anyone else. If they could then there would be no problem. There would be no reason for all the gaslighting lives and smear campaigns. But they can't. And how you do one thing is how you do everything. Small habits echo across all aspects of our lives. So if they never even tried to make amends with you. That's a sign that they are never going to be happy. And they're never going to experience a stable relationship with anyone. Because they never managed to find that instability within themselves. Thank you for watching. If you found this video helpful please give it a thumbs up. Share your thoughts in the comments section. Hit the subscribe button to receive the notifications. If you would like to support the channel. You can donate at paypal.me slash Narc Survivor. You can book a one-on-one with me on my website. It's narcsurvivor.co.uk Thank you for watching and I'll talk to you soon.