 to think tekawa'i in downtown Honolulu for making these shows possible. I'd like to ask a question. Parents, who are responsible for teaching your keiki about sex education? Let's find out with Kahu Dei Wilweber from Onipa'a, which is under the Homalu Native Hawaiian Organization. Aloha and welcome Kahu David. Aloha Wendy, mahalo for having me on and I got to give you a warning. I get pretty fired up about this topic. Well, it's a very serious topic and I can understand that you would get fired up and I'm hoping the parents would get fired up enough to ask questions and seek further information from where they can, which is from you and your organization. So Dave, please share with us, what is Onipa'a and why is it needed? So Onipa'a is basically the teaching that we use, that we teach with. We teach basically the framework that the best, healthiest, safest sex is found in the framework of lifelong loving marriage. And so immediately somebody might think, wow, that's old fashioned. And I would like to say it's old as in it's tested, it's timeless and it's true. It's cross all culture and it also is fashioned. And so I compare this with kind of the big five of where kids get their information about sex these days, TV, Hollywood, social media, pornography, the school system, advertising. And you think about that messaging and what the cakey are receiving. And basically it's infatuation at first sight or worse, lost at first sight. The school systems teach every student has a right to sexual pleasure. I look at that and I think, wow, okay, pleasure is good in sex, but I also think about our taste buds. Have you ever thought about that we didn't necessarily have to have joy and enjoyment as we eat food? And so what if I would say I have a right to taste bud pleasure? Well, I know for me it would lead to my death because Long's the other day had a sale on the Halloween candy and I went and I got a bag of Twix that were for $1.79 instead of $6.99, but I couldn't stop at one so I grabbed about six and I polished off that whole bag of 10 ounce Twix in one day. And if I made my whole life about I have the right to taste bud pleasure, oh my goodness, I would literally die from that. And so you think about that and there's more to food or eating than our taste bud pleasure. There's also nutrition, right? Which is way more important than the pleasure from it. So if we take that same analogy over to a right to sexual pleasure, the same results can happen. So you look at those five that are coming against kids giving a message about sexuality and that's why we need the old and the fashion and the tried and the true that there is a mulbeta. And so oni pa'a is basically a Hawaiian word made up of two Hawaiian words. And if we can see the logo, that would be really great because oni means a shaking or a shifting and pa'a means established, steadfast, immovable in the midst of the shaking and shifting. And so oni pa'a exists to bring a huli, a flip to the counterfeit sex narrative that's found in the big five because we want optimal sexual health for kids and that is found in lifelong loving, healthy marriage. Oh, okay, and then you did that all in one breath. That is amazing, the analogy that you gave me and everyone listening about the sugar and the abuse of what we can do to our body if there were no rules or guidelines. And so I'm understanding a little bit more about oni pa'a right now and I love the correlation right there and very relatable. So here we want to visualize a photo of a tea leaf in the next slide. What does this represent, Dave? So one sister Kanaka Lahina has sent this to me and she was really concerned because if you look really carefully, there's a peely vine that's going around the keiki and the parent tea leaves. So the tea leaves is, when I look at it, it's like an ohana, generations of an ohana. Like the outsides of it is the kupuna and they've been around the longest and therefore are growing outward and then comes the parent leaves and they come outward and then lastly come the keiki on the inside. But you can see that peely vine wrapped itself around the parent and the keiki tea leaves. And the end result of this will be death not only for the keiki and the parent but also as the kupuna die, basically it's the end of the generation of that tea leaf. Wow, again, are you a teacher or what? That is a great analogy. I'm learning so much and I mean, we see tea leaves all over but now we'll look at it differently because it represents life and the quality of life or the quality of life that we don't have. So Dave, do you mean to tell me that our keiki are being choked out? Well, that was the interpretation of this sister who sent this to me. She said the aina is speaking to us and so I reflected on her comment that the aina is speaking, that the keikis are being choked and as I reflected, there's an attack on the keiki as well as all of us humans and it's attack on identity in at least eight ways that I identified, seven ways identified, ohana identity, ethnic identity, biological sex identity, cultural identity, spiritual identity, human identity, national identity and by national I include Hawaii and America in that. And so I look at this and I would like each person to pause the screen and look at that image and ponder how are there attacks on each of those identities? I was recently around 25 individuals, fairly Akamai people and we spent 20 minutes talking about various attacks and we only got through the fifth one and we had to move on because time was so short but we had listed about 30 attacks. So I'm just gonna give you one. For a child, think about divorce. So if there is tension between the biological dad and the biological mom, that tension is experienced at a gut level with the keiki because what we teach and what the body teaches is that 23 chromosomes came from the dad and 23 chromosomes came from the mom. So if that child sees tension and conflict or divorce or an absent father, that child is going to experience that acutely right in their gut and it doesn't feel good. And so our keiki today need to be pa'a in the midst of oni but pa'a knowing that marriage is the best for all sexuality and the best for emotional satisfaction in terms of relationships. I don't wanna knock our singles but the studies are showing that what's best for sexual satisfaction and emotional satisfaction is lifelong loving marriage. Singles can have emotional satisfaction in their relationships and in communities and that is very important for society and them. For our kids, what's happening is that marriage is being ripped out of the messaging of sex and sexuality. So think of those big five. How much do they focus on marriage? Like I'll ask the kids, when's the last time you saw a baby born in porn or you saw a married couple with porn and I am not encouraging them to look at porn but the statistics are showing that kids will see porn by the age of 11. For me, it was age seven or eight. And so this messaging is getting into their minds and their brains. And so our teaching is actually establishing the kids in their identity. So take for example, the human identity that's under attack. I'll tell the kids. I don't ever wanna hear you call one another person, one loser. And then I'll quickly talk about that when the reproductive system comes together and what's the only way that the reproductive system comes together naturally, what do you need? You need a biological male and you need a biological female. That's the only way. So already that's validating their biological sex identity but when you bring those two together, there's fluid exchange and in the fluid exchange there are 150 million sperm that are off to the races looking for that one egg that the female brings to the equation. And so I tell the kids, wait a second, you are not one loser. There were 149,999,999 losers but you kids are the winners and they get it and they feel validated in who they are. They are not some random chance. They are on purpose. They were a one in 150 million purpose. And then you start looking at the genetic possibilities of the 23 chromosomes and the 23 chromosomes and they really are more of a one in a 70 trillion purpose. So these are just some things as you hear this teaching of what I would call sexual truth, which is based on reproduction. It's based on what the body is speaking. Kids become validated in their identity. They realize that they are important. And so that really leads to the third slide which our goal is to set the keiki free. That's what we want for all keiki, all parents, all Ohana is to live freely and to thrive and to have sexual choices influence the whole lahui, the whole community, the whole nation. And I remember growing up in the 80s that I was told what happens in the bedroom does not impact anybody else. So let us do whatever we want in the bedroom. Is that really true? Well, what happens in the bedroom actually impacts everything. That's why this teaching today is and the only teaching is for everybody. Businesses, schools, families, because choices that happen inside the bedroom will impact others. If we're taught a message of engage in sex like in porn or in the school system, engage in sex but it doesn't mention marriage, that means people are gonna be bouncing from partner to partner to partner. What's that gonna do for STDs? Well, how is that gonna then impact the healthcare system? That's gonna tax and labor the healthcare system. What about mental health? It's interesting, safe sex is called condom, contraception and consent. But tell me what has condoms done for protecting the hearts? And so kids that buy into this message that they're told that, hey, you have a right to sexual pleasure and they believe that message and they follow the model that's in porn, their brains are locking in on that, their brains are being wired and they're seeing dangerous sexual behavior and then they're hearing that they should go for it. That's gonna affect their mental health and their emotional health. How is that gonna tax the healthcare system in terms of therapy and counseling and so forth? And then of course we see the results in the prison system. And think about the prison system. I think the stat is that 90% of those in prison do not know their biological father didn't have a biological father, they didn't know him. They obviously had a biological father. So that was a sexual choice that has impacted that cakey greatly and then how does that impact society? Who's paying the bill for somebody to be in prison? So with one teaching of sexuality, it creates a burden for the individual but also for the whole of society. With our teaching, it actually ends up being a blessing for the child, for the future marriage. One stat that's kind of interesting is that married men make more money than single men. Married men live longer and healthier lives with less hospital visits than do single men. So we can see statistically research showing that there is a mulbeta when it comes to sexuality, keeping it within lifelong loving, healthy marriage really is the best. And so that's really what should be taught in the big five. How come it's not? Right, I get it. I mean, I'm with Kamagopi kids all the time. I'm with the kids on the street all the time. And yes, that's the major problem that we hear are always. And that's a saddiss. And we as adults have to look at all of that, you know, even more seriously when we fall in love. And so that's the problem is that they fall in love and you don't fall in love, you know, but we'll get into that another time. If you fall into infatuation or we fall into lust, you don't fall into love. That takes months and years to get to know somebody well enough, the whole person. So that's why the big five doesn't convey real love, but we do. One of the things we look at is distinguishing, discerning, being Maka'ala, eyes awake about the difference between infatuation, lust and love. Go ahead. So what do the youth have to say about Onipa? That's the fun part. We've got feedback from them, from each teaching. I love what this female age 13 said. Onipa helped me realize the importance of sex and made me change my choices to not engage in sexual activities before marriage. And then how about this male, age 17? This program taught me not only about the deeper reality behind sex, but also life. So this is way bigger than sex education and what we teach. We're teaching about their future. We're talking about relationships. We're talking about success. And then the male said, it taught me to think before doing. It was educational fun and life changing, decision changing. I think you can tell by listening to me, we do have a lot of fun in those classes. We tell great stories. So how about another male, age 18? I feel Onipa gives you a better understanding and depth than you would actually receive from school or elsewhere, the other big four. For example, this youth says, pleasure is less important than the target of marriage for sex. This feels more genuine and gives you second thought to what is actually a good thing for your future. Pretty articulate from these two males. And keep in mind, these are bus up kids that I got this feedback from. These were kids that were actually sexually active before they got to the teaching. So this is a shame free teaching. In fact, the curriculum that we use was designed by a lady who was running a crisis pregnancy center. So the girls that were pregnant were coming to her and her heart was breaking because the girls' hearts were breaking. And after helping them over and over and over, she said, I have got to write a curriculum. So the curriculum is highly, highly sensitive for kids that are already sexually active. And instead of dealing with the past, which would bring shame, we talk about today, their choices today and looking at their future. What is your best optimal sexual health today in relationships and protecting your heart, protecting your future. And we look at all of that. And that's why any kid, no matter what their past is or any adult for that matter can look at today and what are my best decisions that I can make for myself, for my family, for my future possible spouse, for my future possible kids, generations and what is gonna get me on track. And ultimately it's making decisions to avoid risky behavior and the solution is not condoms, the solution is waiting, delaying for lifelong marriage. Every kid and every adult deserves to have that message. And so I'm gonna read the last comment that one female writes, she said of the teachers, they helped me make myself believe I can wait for sex. Whoa, just ponder that for a second. They helped me, the teachers helped me make myself believe I can wait for sex. I would recommend this program so others can understand why sex is important and how you can have the real safe sex, which is in marriage. And so I like to say that the big five is really counterfeit. It's giving a very shallow message about sex. It's making it basically purely physical. And so kids that come to our teaching, they're hungry for something that's real. And you can see it in the kids comments that they're hungry for sexual truth and they have the capacity to get it here and here and in their now and they can know what's best for them and their decisions. Wow, I mean, I wish I was the kid again and I could attend your class. I know you have them for parents as well, but yes, the children, the cakey are hungry for the proper guidance. And it's not the parents fault because maybe they didn't get the proper guidance and knowledge and education. So, money pie is quite crucial to the success of the cakey's futures. And I'm just praying that more and more we'll learn about your programs. And that's why I needed you be on this show today so that we can get the message out that there is somebody who cares and somebody that can make this learning fun and exciting that they receive it. When they receive it, they'll practice it. And so that is the goal right now. So now I wanna hear what do parents say about your Onipa program? Very good. I'll start with one parent and then we'll go to most parents. I love this comment from one parent who sat in on the class. She said, Uncle Dave and Auntie Mylay led the young adults to conclude on their own that sex is best done in a lifelong loving marriage within the first three hours. And we teach for eight hours. So I love that comment because it's not like we're telling the kids how to think. We're engaging them. It's an interactive discussion that lasts for eight hours. And most of these kids are like, oh darn, can't we meet more? Because it makes sense of life and it makes sense of relationships and it makes sense of their bodies. The girls especially are touched and they are the most vulnerable by the big five. Girls are way more vulnerable for STDs. And so girls that come through our teaching, they realize, whoa, my body is important. I'm important. I need to care for my body. And most parents have the same response that you did, Wendy. Namely, I wish I had this when I was young. And basically all of our teachers say, yes, we wish we did too. So basically a couple of things I wanna tell about Onipa. We view parents as the primary educators for their children. They're not our children. So we view our role as coming alongside the parents. It's ultimately the parents' kuleana to teach and educate their kids about sexuality. But I know there's a lot of reasons why parents don't do it. When parents don't do it, that means the kids are gonna be taught sexuality by the big five. And I don't think we're gonna be happy with the results. And so we want to come alongside the parent. What we like to do, and we've learned this, is we wanna educate the parent before the child. We want the parent to vet us. We don't want the parent to say, oh, well, I heard about Dave from this person or this auntie. No, don't trust anybody when it comes to this matter of sexuality. It's like literally life changing and can lead to death or life. We want parents to vet us. That's your kuleana. So before any of your children, you send to our teaching, we wanna engage you and we want you to vet us. Learn about the teaching so that you can decide. And I know the time is short. Can we hit the benefits? Yeah, so I just want, we have like a minute left. So what are just, give me one or a real short benefit of the Onipa program. And what is some of your teaching content? Excellent. Well, it's right there on that slide and you can pause it. But basically this teaching will help anybody avoid regret. But it's also hope for today. No matter what the past has been, the past shapes us, but it doesn't define us. This teaching, keeping all sexual activity within lifelong loving marriage, it will lead to optimal total health and wellbeing. This teaching will help kids achieve future goals. It will increase wealth and read that about the success sequence on your screen. It leads to better sex. Yes, lifelong loving marriage. You get really good at it. And I intend on having sex into my 70s and 80s. That's what we want. That's what's good for society. And then you can read the rest of this, but do contact me. We love, we can teach this anywhere. We've taught it under a Ulu tree. We've taught it in a church sanctuary on Molokai. We can teach it in classrooms. All back to you, sis. All right, so yes, our time has come to a close for now. And it's not like you're making it or you're taking sex away. You're making it more fun and more rewarding when it's the right time. And so this is very valuable information and to get excited about that. Dave, you share some very critical points on how we can guide our children towards a happier and more fulfilling life, as well as the adults. So Mahalo, I'm Wendy Lo and we will return in two weeks with another edition of Taking Your Health Back. Mahalo, Kahudev, Aloha.