 Did Islam say, no way divorce? Did Islam, for example, say, yes divorce? As you won't know, Islam took the middle ground. Islam first and foremost recognized that these two may have not known each other before, correct? As in how do our marriages really work? The two of them may know each other for six months. And you know that six months period is the best period of your life, correct? Because you know you can drop her home and go and chill with your friends, yes? There's no nagging when are you coming home, when are you gonna be there, when are you with? Everyone loves their engagement period, yes? You have your fun with your girl and then you take her home and you say, Mashallah, I'm gonna miss you. Get out of here quickly. Baba, let me go back to my friends. The person enjoys that engagement period, but then when the two of them get married to each other, we know very well they've come from different backgrounds. We know very well she's moved into a new house. It's not an E equals MC squared relationship. These are two human beings with two different emotions, two different backgrounds. If there isn't Saba at the beginning, then there's a chance that all of them may not click. Sometimes Islam says you may be good friends, but not good husband and wife, correct? There are some people out there, good friends, but there's no click physically. If there's no click physically, imagine the husband and wife are good friends, but there's no click physically. If Islam said that you can't get divorced, that means you're telling me I have to live with someone the whole of my life. I'm good friends with them, but I don't click physically. What do I do? I can't come near the person or she can't come near me. If Islam said it's haram, divorce is wrong, then I have to stick with someone I don't like. We'll end up committing zinnah, correct or no? She'll go her way, I'll go mine. Islam said no. Islam said we want the both of you to live in peace, but we also recognize that you're human beings and you have different faculties, and therefore you may come to a conclusion that you can't live with each other. Islam therefore took the middle ground that divorce is something which is allowed, but Islam reminded its followers what? That the one act which shakes the arsh is divorce. Why? Because Islam wanted to remind its followers, divorce, number one, can have a domino effect on the community. When you're to divorce, it's not just true who are divorcing. The families then are sensitive with each other. The community then has to break up friendships because my cousin divorced his niece. So Islam said try and reflect your community makeup and you know how much Islam concentrates on the community. Number one, your community makeup, it might be destroyed. Number two, at the same time, if you have children, those children grow up without a father figure in their life or those children grow up in a single parent home, that child grows up without the discipline they may need. The father moves on to a new life. That's why be careful when you get married, don't just divorce while there's children running around. Today you have people, two kids, three kids, and they find it normal. They turn around and they say what? They turn around and they say that why shouldn't I get divorced? You reply back to them by saying, but Bob, if you get divorced, what's gonna happen? You're gonna leave this child to grow up. There's no father figure in their life. That child doesn't have that social stability. That child doesn't have that room or door at home. It's not that easy just to say, okay, us two don't get on. How about the children? Sometimes the sacrifice may need to be made for the sake of the children. Therefore Islam said divorce is allowed but try and reflect on the permanent effects of divorce. Correct or no? Try and reflect that that divorce that is taking place that may damage the very fabric of the society within which you live. But did Rasulullah want to put a stigma on those who are divorces? No, you see in our communities today, if someone's a divorcee, no one goes to approach them for marriage. You find people turning around and saying that girl's a divorcee. Okay, she's a divorcee. What's she done wrong? What's she done wrong? Oh, do you know what I heard? Don't give me what I heard. In a divorce, both are the problem, not one. We love to hear one side of the story. It's our nature, gossip. I can't wait for another divorce. Let's hear what happened, correct? We love to hear one side. Mark my words in a divorce, yes? Unless you're a prophet of Allah or a ma'asom, there's two sides to every story, correct or no? Don't put the blame on everyone. They tell you how to say, well, that girl's a divorcee. That girl may be a divorcee. Number one, she may have done nothing wrong. Number two, even if she did do something wrong, how do you know she hasn't done toba and changed? How do you know she didn't do istighfar as if you're an angel flying on the earth and everybody else is a devil, yes? Ma'sha'Allah, some of them is an angel walking around and he's saying, you know what? She's a bad girl. And have you seen yourself in the mirror or no? Look at yourself, then you'll see what a bad person is. Rasulallah purposely married an ex-divorcee. purposely. Why? Because the Arabs used to say marrying a divorcee is embarrassing. Stay away from a divorcee. His cousin Zaynab was married to his stepson Zaid. Rasulallah had adopted a young boy by the name of Zaid. Many times people ask me, adoption in Islam, is it allowed or not? Of course it's allowed. Rasulallah adopted. I have a mention on this from five years ago, adoption in Islam. Rasulallah adopted Zaid. When he adopted Zaid, Zaid married who? His cousin Zaynab. Now you know very well, Zaynab was from the aristocracy. Zaid was a servant. Rasulallah wanted to break the idea that you know what, there is an aristocracy and there are people who are low. Everyone is the same in the eyes of Allah. But the two of them couldn't get on and Rasulallah could not force them to get on, yes? I can't force my daughter to love the person. I can't force my cousin to stay in a marriage. So when they got divorced, who married her? Rasulallah married Zaynab. The Arabs at the time to marry a divorcee or to marry the ex-wife of your adopted son was seen as a cultural taboo. You see other than Bibi Khadija, every other marriage of Rasulallah was for a political or legal reason. Bibi Khadija is the only marriage Rasulallah married because of his love for her. The rest of them are either political or legal. This one wanted to introduce a law. What's the law? The law that this one wanted to introduce was that a divorcee should not be a taboo in your community. If a girl gets divorced at 20, are you serious that she has to wait till 37, 38 until someone marries her? Are you serious that a girl who's 25 gets divorced and the whole community says, you know what, don't approach her. Why? She's divorced. But what she done, haram. Has she left Ahlul Bayt? Has she left the love of the ma'soomeen? Has she dishonored her parents? No, maybe her and the person they didn't get on. He was from one country, she was from another. The cultures were different. He was from one country, she was from another. That he was homesick or she was homesick. It can happen. Rasulallah therefore married an ex-divorcee. And you know what's good about Muslims? Muslims are very funny. The parts of Rasulallah they want to take, they take. The others they reject, correct or no? We love the areas that suit us. Rasulallah, there's something in his life that suits us, we follow. But when you tell Muslims, for example, you tell them Rasulallah married someone older than him. Why don't you marry someone older than you? No, no, no, no, no, I can't. But Rasulallah is sunnah. I have to follow a sunnah, correct? Or Rasulallah, for example, married a divorcee. Will you marry a divorcee? Divorcee, you must be joking. She has a black cross on her. Which black cross, yeah, who put a black cross? Who have you become? Maliki or Medin? If you're Maliki or Medin, put a black cross, yes? Otherwise you are no one to put a black cross. Therefore Rasulallah wanted to show Islam was balanced on divorce. Islam did not want to put a taboo on divorce. Islam wanted divorce to approach it rationally.