 is described clinically as a shared psychotic disorder because there are powerful elements of psychosis in this. But to summarize the answer, there is no... there is no narcissist with the false self. There's only false self. The false self is the narcissist. The narcissist is a piece of fiction. It's a script. It's a movie. It's a horrible movie. That's the narcissist. He's nothing. And that's the reason why narcissists don't go and seek help and go for therapy. Would it be terrified that this false self would be identified and changed? I don't think narcissists go very deeply. I think not going to therapy is mainly a question of grandiosity because the relationship with the therapist by definition is hierarchical relationship. The therapist knows more than you. Otherwise why do you go to him? He's an expert. So he knows more than you, but how can he know more than you if you know everything? If you're a niche. The narcissist has power within the therapeutic setting. He can tell you what to do. You can end the session. You can say you're 50 minutes finished. He can demand money from you. So he can make you do things you don't want to do. You don't want to pay the therapist. But he can ask you to pay. So the therapy is a situation where you surrender control. You surrender power. And this is something anathema to narcissists. Something narcissists would never countens, never consider. So it has more to do with grandiosity than with false health. False health and all this is how we know. We understand how things are happening behind the scenes. But as the narcissist experiences it, he immediately starts to challenge the therapist. What do you know? Who are your clients? You're not very successful. I know more than you. I watch many videos on YouTube. I read books. Do you know? The narcissist challenges in order to, at the very minimum, equalize himself with the narcissist. As far as knowledge, as far as power, as far as expertise, as far as control of the process. He wants to control the process. So it is not possible to conduct therapy in such conditions. Why does a victim want to help a narcissist? He wants to help the narcissist. Why does he want to take it out of the situation and still in love with the narcissist? We just said that the narcissist does not exist. And to some extent the victim does not exist. We come to that in a minute. The narcissist does not exist. What is a narcissist? It's a reflection. A narcissist has a false self. People see the false self, not the narcissist. See the false self. And they reflect the false self to the narcissist. The narcissist collects these reflections, puts them together in a collage. And that is the narcissist. I suggested in my work that the narcissist doesn't have a mind, a unitary mind. He has a hive mind, like bees. He has a hive mind. He takes a reflection and then he puts them all together in a collage, montage. And this is his mind. This is his soul. So it's not unitary. It's fragmentary. And it's kaleidoscopic. While in a healthy person the identity, the core, is stable. In a narcissist, it's crucially dependent on feedback. So when the feedback comes, the narcissist's core, shifts shape. It's a shapeshifter. Sheep's colors, sheep's angles. Narcissist's soul or psyche all the time moves, like kaleidoscope. You can never see the same narcissist twice. Like you can never enter the same river twice. Narcissist changes second by second, depending on feedback. Constantly monitoring. Constantly sucking attention, sucking feedback. And using this input to reconstruct himself on the go. So he reconstructs his entire identity and self second by second by second by second. And no wonder that narcissism is very energy depleting. It's a very exhausting process. So I said that the narcissist is a reflection. Now the tool we use to generate reflections is a mirror. So a narcissist is a whole of mirrors. It's a mirror, reflecting a mirror, reflecting a mirror, reflecting a mirror. It's a whole of mirrors. When the victim enters this whole, and in this whole of mirrors, there is nobody. This is something victims must understand. There is no person there. There is nobody. There is no whole of mirrors. There are only mirrors. Who is the narcissist? What is reflected in the mirrors? The narcissist is the sum total of the reflection in the mirrors. Now what happens is the victim enters the whole of mirrors, falls in love with the narcissist, enters the whole of mirrors. What does she see? Herself. She sees herself. Herself, actually. Who does she fall in love with? Her reflection. Not the narcissist. Because there is no such thing. There is no narcissist. There isn't. She falls in love with her reflection. It is the victim's only way to love herself. She is in love with herself in the mirrors. She falls in love with her with her amplification. With her finally. What she considers to be her essence. When she enters the whole of mirrors, there is an immediate effect of extreme love. Why extreme love? Because it's she. She falls in love with herself. And then it becomes literally impossible to engage from the narcissist. Or to fall out of love. Why? Because you don't love the narcissist. You love yourself. How can you fall in love out of yourself? How can you fall out of love with yourself? How can you stop loving yourself? You can stop loving an external person. Another person. But you can never ever stop loving yourself. That's the narcissist's trick. It's magic. The narcissist is a magician. It's a slate of hand. He makes you fall in love with yourself. Through his whole of mirrors. At that point the whole of mirrors becomes