 Craft presents the Great Gilder Slave Cheese company who also bring you Bing cross the every Thursday night present each week at this time Harold Perry is the Great Gilder Slave Written by Leonard L. Levinson We'll hear from the Great Gilder Slave in just a moment But if tomorrow's wash day and you homemakers are bound to be hurried getting lunch Let me give you a tip serve the folks macaroni and cheese Do you say you haven't time to bake macaroni and cheese on wash day? Well, of course you don't but haven't you heard of craft dinner with craft dinner You can make grand macaroni and cheese in just seven minutes cooking time. You see you don't bake craft dinner macaroni You don't fuss with grating cheese because each package of craft dinner contains an envelope of craft grated all ready to sprinkle in With craft dinner you get fluffy tender macaroni drenched in cheese goodness and you cook it in seven minutes fly See for yourself tomorrow. Ask your food dealer for craft dinner And now let's visit our friend the Great Gilder Slave who's been long noted for his easygoing disposition In fact, his disposition was so easygoing and finally went Uncle Mort's face has been getting longer in his temper shorter And he's starting to throw his weight around with unpleasant results everywhere. It's landed. Oh My goodness Marjorie. I'm late to the office again. Good morning. Good morning. All right I'm am I supposed to starve around here? Where's breakfast birdie breakfast? What you start off with great food cantaloupe strawberries orange juice. What's the trouble? Don't the store still sell prunes? Oh, I thought you're sick and tired of prunes. Whatever gave you that idea Oh yesterday morning you flung yourself out of the house and you sped up and I asked me run What the trouble wasn't he says you full of prunes? Oh Excuse me folks, I gotta hurry to school. Yeah, come back here young man School doesn't begin again. We'll make September just my luck. Oh What am I saying? Now I'll go. Why don't you sit down and eat the nice egg birdies fried for you? That's what I'm trying to do What is this a fried egg or the stopper out of the kitchen sink? It's an egg. Mr. Gills leaving it was cooked. It wasn't cooked birdie. It was vulcanized. I Give up just wrap it up and on my way downtown. I'll drop it on a scrap rubber pile By George, I'd like to slap a jab in the map with this scrap And there's gonna be a war in this house unless I start getting fed properly around here Man man, he's worse today than he was yesterday when he poured the coffee in his lap and then spilled the cream on his vest Thus dissolved the sugar in his pocket Yeah, I wonder what's wrong with uncle lately. He's been as jumpy as a kangaroo on a pogo stick Yes poor uncle mort. You mean poor us. We're the one. He's doing his jumping on you know I think I have an idea what's troubling him. Gee. What is it sis uncle mort hasn't any Love life offer corn sake be serious. Can't you large? But I am serious He could only get excited about some woman it might calm him down Oh, you mean he ought to get on himself away. What does he want a wife for? He's got Marge to so on his buttons and you to cook for him and judge hooker to fight with what more could a guy I Don't necessarily mean a wife Lee Roy, but some attractive woman He could get interested in and he wouldn't have time to be irrefutable or critical at least we could experiment Okay, but who we get to turn on the glamour. Well, how about Mrs. Salisbury tWitchell? Nope. Her face has had too many retreads Well, what do you say to miss Rosita Callaghan? Oh, she's got a pen like a rabbit Now wait a minute brother, who's going to fall in love with this girl you're uncle more Well, Geo is just giving young man's new point Well, who would you pick up? What about Amelia hooker judge hooker sister? Sure She's awfully nice and jolly, and she makes the swellest cakes and candy teacher. That's all. What does she do? Oh, she teaches girls domestic silence and I don't know about that. You can't make a silk purse in a pig die Now building up a romance for you all good morning go be no picnic picnic come Sunday and invite judge hooker and his sister I'll make some of my famous potato salad that ought to bring judge hooker And I'll ask Amelia to bake one of her luscious cakes that should bring uncle. Yeah, and it'll probably bring all the ants too No, my tree. This is Sunday the day I rest my feet. I refuse to go on your picnic Why not uncle more? Well, you've heard about nature lovers, haven't you? Of course. Well, I'm a nature hater Rocks, conks, snakes, bees, swamps, mosquitoes You can take all of them and give them back to the Boy Scouts and tell them to give them back to the Indians Think of all the fun. We'll have it underwood fall. What fun grinding the rubber off our tires No, we're saving rubber. We're taking the excursion train. We if who all's going on this pickle and potato salad promenade Well as Lee Roy me and judge hooker and his judge hooker. Yeah, is Amelia hooker going to She's baked the most delicious devil food cake for you incidentally for me, but why devil's food? I guess it's because she thinks you're such a handsome devil handsome devil who me Oh uncle more that the first time you've laughed in a week. Yeah, come on along. You'll have fun my tree I told you how I feel about picnics Strange I mean you thought you were an outdoor man. She said that you were minor of Gary Cooper What's the funny about that Amelia's entitled her opinion Gary Cooper a gosh, I don't know what to say It hmm Gary Cooper, huh? Well, I don't know. Oh, why don't you join us uncle? We're leaving on the 10 o'clock Gary Cooper, huh? He excused me partner. Would you mind stepping away from that there mirror? Thanks. Yeah, I see what she means by Gary Cooper. Amelia was talking about the wide open spaces Isn't this beautiful mighty pretty country here Bob's man the air is so fine and clear Yes, you just say the word Miss Amelia and I'll climb that var tree and bring you down some eagle eggs Oh, no, thank you. Mr. Gilda's leave. Well, then can I fetch you some more tater salad? No, not another thing. Mr. Gilda's leave now, Miss Amelia. No need to be formal. Just call me Throckmorton Sounds mighty like music here and you say it ma'am Mind if I sit alongside you here? No, no, that's all right. Don't move Excuse me miss Amelia, but where boss is you put that devil's food cake Never mind Yeah Why can't you be more careful where you put your circumference you Big putty punch now Horace hooker stopping solving thought more. Oh, I don't mind come is a media Let's wander down to the pond and look at the water lilies Why that little Joker oh Look, I think pretty would you like some I'll wait out and get them for you. Oh, no, Throckmorton You'll get your shoes way. Oh, no, I won't I'll just take them off And my socks and roll up my trousers No Daniel Boone, it's just your feet that are cold I'll show you hooker. It's just a second to media. I'll have your bouquet and just Who put that hole there? Oh My goodness, I've ruined all my cigars Here take my man. Yeah, thanks. Is it very wet in there one for one day. Come on We're one thing good. What's the cake icing off the trousers? Yeah, there must be an easier way of doing it than that Here Leroy, please dry off my wife. Okay, I'll bring it out. Yeah My goodness, give me a towel someone why don't you just shake yourself you little air dale Look at me. I'm a mess. Yeah, you haven't changed a bit Oh, it's almost time for our train and the station's a mile away Where's your coat? I hung it on a limb of a tree while we were playing baseball. Oh, yes, there it is. I'll I'll get it for you Then we must hurry up. Oh What's the matter media look a bird it's building a nest in your coat pocket. What's that? Let me see Look everybody a bird's building its nest in my coat pocket. Oh, how sweet. Well, what a pity We have to dispossess her after all her work. Well, what are we supposed to be the FHA? Sure way and let's get going. Oh, Horace. You're too cruel. I am not well What are you going to do leave your coat here? Yes by George. That's exactly what I'm going to do No, I won't my dear the memory of that little mother bird's gratitude will keep me warm That's the only burden the country with a double breasted bungalow Yes, yes coming Horace That was a very sweet gesture Scott Morton. I like that very much. No, no media. It's nothing that Gary Cooper wouldn't have done Yeah, sure You're leaving your coat here. Well, my boy in the first place has made a wonderful impression on Amelia in the second place The rest of the suit was ruined anyway And in the third place that bird that was building the nest was a woodpecker and I never argue with woodpeckers in the first place Meanwhile a suggestion about getting your food budget to balance you're on the lookout for economical main dishes I know well, let me point out the thrifty product called craft dinner for craft dinner not only gives you grand macaroni and cheese and a jiffy It's very economical to to make this delicious craft dinner macaroni and cheese You simply cook the special craft dinner macaroni and boiling water You cook it not more than seven minutes and drain off the water add a little butter and milk Then with the craft grated that comes in every package You sprinkle the cheese flavor through and through the fluffy macaroni in as little time as it takes the coffee to perk You have a grand money-saving main dish ready macaroni and cheese that the whole family will love Many smart homemakers are never without craft dinner on the pantry shelf So tomorrow why don't you get your pantry set for delicious macaroni and cheese that you make in seven minutes Get several packages of craft dinner Love like mumps and measles hits awfully hard when it hits late in life and trock Morton P. Gildersleeve has it bad For the past week uncle mort has been wooing and wowing Amelia Hooker It's reached the stage where he's writing poetry now We find the summer field Shelly reciting a son of Britain especially for the fair Amelia If this were in the days of old and I and I so brave and bold I'd storm your castle Miss Amelia and on my charger I would steal you You like that one. Oh, I'm duper to play mr. Gilson. Yeah, thanks, buddy. How do you think she'd like this one better? It two eyes are blue cheeks soft as silk a skin as white as great a milk And neck is graceful as a swan a step as dainty as a fawn The girl I mean is quite a looker. Her name is Miss Amelia Hooker You show in some verse of fire it you mean verse of fire No, sir fire on a kind of that hot poetry you write I bet you can get a job poor ties and greeting cards. Oh, I suppose I could but I don't want to lose my immature standing Incidentally Bernie don't mention a word about this to anybody. Will you please? Oh, no, sir I wanted to get your reaction because I'm gonna take Miss Amelia for a stroll through the park tonight and read her 15 or 20 of the poems I've written. There's gonna be a wee fiddle moon On account of the fellow she's calling on me tonight is such a drip How's the big romance between you and Amelia coming along? What are you referring to Dottie? Oh, I heard all about your big moment It's all over time like a newspaper and I win. Where did you hear this rumor? Well, the operator at the beauty par told me and she had it from one of her customers Your sister-in-law hasn't made the work next door to the judge's locker And she got a straight out of Erskine Stars column in the afternoon paper. It's what? It said what big business man size 48 Is that way about the charming sister-in-law promise? What are you thinking about Drockmorton? Those crickets immediate listen to them It's hard to believe that they can do that just by rubbing their hind legs together No immediate I was thinking of your lips like twin petals of a dewey rose they Amelia there's something I must ask you yes, it would you give me a yes Would you if you got a match my cigar's gone? You shouldn't smoke so much. I know it but when I look at you my heart's on fire and I just can't help smoking a little bit Incidentally immediate I wrote a poem this afternoon. Would you like to hear? Oh, yes? I'd be glad to all right It goes something like this if this were in the days of old and I innate nights so brave and bold Yeah, well, what do you want excuse me buddy, but if you're gonna die it no Peter can't you see I'm busy Oh, excuse me. I didn't know you're engaged. We're not engaged. We're just good friends. Go on scram But all I asked for was a dime Amelia. Do you happen to have changed for a quarter? Dr. Morton think the gentleman has a cold and is asking for the time. Yeah, that's it. Oh, excuse me. Let's see It's in 942. Oh, thank you truck boys died for it too. Well, that means I got plenty time by the fact that ever No, you can have the whole bench on a web here. Anyway, come on immediate. Let's stroll across the grass I still think he's trying to borrow a dime. Oh now. Let's forget everything else. It's a grand night for a walk and You are starting to recite a poem. Oh, yes, but I had such bad luck for the last one I think I'll try another verse is since I met you I've lost all care I feel like I'm walking on the air. You're not walking on the air. Mr You're walking on the grass. So what? I'm a park policeman scene It's against the law to trample on the turf lounge on the lawn or gamble on the green. Who's gambling now? Officer, it was purely unintentional. Oh, excuse me. I didn't see you girly Well run along and from now on try to keep your father on the straight and narrow path Boy that flat headed flat foot Why can't people let people own when people are trying to recite poetry to people? Oh, come on off the grass Dr. Morton and do let me hear your poem. Yeah, all right immediately. I'll try another let me see Oh, yes, it's two eyes of blue cheeks soft to silk a skin as white as gray day milk Well, well fancy meeting you two in the park. I wonder if Shakespeare had to go through what I have to go Good evening, Horace. Well, go on with your conversation guilty. Don't let me interrupt you. Oh, what's the use? If you'll excuse me Amelia, I'll run along home now. Oh, but throughout Morton I wanted to hear the rest of the You know, I know I'm gonna lock myself in my room and telephone it to you. Goodbye Never felt better my dear I'm practicing some singing exercises. Don't tell anybody but tonight. I'm gonna serenade honey bun. Yeah, I mean miss Hooker Oh You've certainly been in there pitching the wool won't go pitching the what the wool springing a line making with a heartthrob If you're referring to my tender passion for miss hooker marjorie. Yes, I've been giving cupid the jive How's everything going not so well last night I hit a snag you did the snag's name was judge hooker He didn't actually hit him. Did you want him off? If I didn't then why is my mandolin all caved in? I smacked him right in the middle of his veranda But why uncle more? Well, he made a big fuss just because I was strumming a few tunes to Amelia not that it was very late at night Couldn't have been much later than three And he came barging out of the house on his nightgown demanding that I hand over my mandolin He kept yelling give it to me. Give it to me. So I finally did You shouldn't have done that uncle. I know it now. He's refused to let me visit his sister Reminds you of romeo and juliet doesn't it? But if the judge has forbidden you to see Amelia, how are you going to serenade her well tonight's his large night He belongs to the summerfield's nest of the international order of who dolls In fact, he's the grand screech So he should be gone by eight o'clock well if your phone to see if Amelia will be home No, every time I call up hooker answers the phone. I'm going to try it again right now Maybe he's gone out somewhere. I suppose he hasn't oh, I've got a ski. I'll disguise my voice so you won't recognize me Hello Hello What number this please judge hooker's residence. Oh, george hooky president No, this is judge horris hooker. Oh, are you hooky horsey, huh? No good. No. No. No. This is judge hooker. Now. Who's this you george hooky see me? No, no, who are you? Oh, me know that long time Watch your name and what do you want? I'm me lily only lily. Hey, lolly. Oh, thanks. We watch our own hands Oh For corn say I said belly smelly What are you calling about missy hooky? She home, huh? Oh, yes. Is there any message I can take? No judge. Just skip it Now what are you going to do uncle more? I don't give up very easily my tree Remember love laughs at locksmiths in jeers at jug heads like the judge I'm going to send the media a box of candy with a message inside. I read that someplace that should do the trick Hey birdie Well, you calling me mr. Gillslee. Yes, buddy. Are you finished with the dishes yet? I've done the dunking, but the wiping is waiting I want you to take a package over to missy media for me Smuggle it in so her brother doesn't find it. See how do you think you can act as cupid's messenger in this case? Oh, certainly, mr. Gillslee. I'll be cupid's messenger in town I'm coming Ralph after all they can't start until the grand screech arrives But if you're late, they're lovely elected new one before you get there. Oh, they couldn't do that. Oh, no I remember correctly. That's how you were elected. Yeah, but the first thing I did was to change that room Yeah, well, I'll be in wait a second. Someone's coming to the house, I think. Oh, hello birdie Hello judge. Look, you got there something for me. No, no sir. Then it must be for miss Amelia Yeah, that's it. It's for miss Amelia. Fine. Just give it to me and I'll take it into her But I've had strict instructions to put it right in her own hand She's upstairs and there's no use making her come down to answer the door. I'll take it I don't know whether that's right for me to do it. But just give me one reason why not Okay, I'll give you a reason but I have to go home to get it Fine Now just a second There's no use you lugging that package all the way home and then back here again Just leave it with me until you come back. All right. I get this. Thanks birdie. I'll take good care of it That's mighty considerate of you judge Hey, what's the idea? That's Gillesle's cook I've forbidden him to see my sister and dollars to donuts. This package is something he said her What are you doing boiling big gilders? Well, well, well chocolates. Yeah, have some Ralph. Hmm. Oh look a note. Let me see Listen to this Dearest darling moonflower. I've phoned and called to see you all day long. Ah, but in vain And who are so cruelly kept us apart your brother the little tinker Something's wrong with the s on his typewriter I'll fool him tonight when all sour puss is playing hudow I'll glide beneath your window and let the golden notes of song pour out of my throat your fluckums. Welcome Say judge, what are you gonna do first? We're going to finish eating this candy Then I'm going to get a myriad of the house on some pretext rather than you and I are going upstairs And fill every pot pitcher and bucket in the house with water Why well when fluffums wuffums pours the golden notes of song out of his throat We're going to pour the water out of the window If for goodness sakes Quiet you musicians. This is supposed to be a serenade not a stampede. Yeah quiet fellas Now you boys hide in the bushes while I tiptoe up in the porch you get it? It I'll let you know when I'm ready. Okay, mr. Gillis leave come on boys Now take it easy and be quiet Light of my life list to my song of love Is that so when you never touched me? I was here in the porch swing all the time. Yeah Yeah, but you got the whole band bay hooker. That's the policeman's band. What fix yourself up pretty judge You're about to have visitors. I don't ever got to hear you. Oh, no. Who do you think this is sitting in a porch swing with me? Rudy valley Yeah Ladies and gentlemen, this has been our last broadcast before our summer vacation Before we go I'd like to express my sincere appreciation to the craft cheese company for a most pleasant year Also, my deep thanks to our writer lennard levenson and to the members of the cast for their able assistance Walter tetley who plays lyroy my nephew lorraine tuttle my niece marjorie lily and randoff whose birdie Earl ross is judge hooker paulo winslow as dotty dobson And william randoff mills our musical director and cease lunder with our producer I am proud to announce that during the eight weeks will be off the air The united states government will take over our half hour to bring you the victory parade Each of the top nbc shows is contributing one program to this series. So be sure to listen in I hope you all have a pleasant summer and now good night Yeah Original music heard on this program was composed and conducted by william randoff This is jim vannon speaking for the craft cheese company and inviting you to tune in again august 30th at the same time for the further adventures of the great gilders layer Right now you american homemakers are more nutrition conscious than ever before You know that wholesome nourishing food will help make strong americans Yes, and you're finding out that the right foods aren't necessarily expensive Certainly a good example of that is nutritious park a margarine the wholesome delicious bread for bread made by craft You see park a margarine is an economical source of important food value Why nourishing park a margarine is one of the best energy foods you can serve And every pound contains 9 000 units of important vitamin a yet for all its goodness It's thrifty too Now once you've tasted park a's delicate appetizing flavor You'll agree it deserves a place on your table morning noon and night So tomorrow order a pound or two of delicious nutritious park a margarine Just ask for park a par k a y Park a margarine made by craft This program has reached you from hollywood. 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