 Let's take a look at this here Okay, that's very confusing this cool cool. Whoa a big you're totally missing him jumping cool idea though and Then and then this is very confusing. You just kind of floats And then over one frame Okay. Hmm. All right. Hold on. Let me see your notes So shot one you clean up the arc of the jump and worked on the poses to make him look like he has control I don't know if he looks his controller not also at the foot rolls with anticipates Yeah, but I would still have a full role here. It's just something about such a flat Area there, but he's pushing off. So Fine, I should be fine. I mean the camera a bit and I think the shot is a bit longer now All right, so a couple things so the quick one first. I would wait with the camera because right now We're giving Spiderman so much headroom that we're cutting things off and it's almost like we're waiting for something to happen here So a I would bring down. I would not translate down It's a really fast translate if you looked at it at a realistic camera. That'd be a bit hard to do So all I would do is keep that camera here keep it keep it keep it and maybe around here ish Which would be frame 23 for you? I would start rotating the camera. Don't do a transit but rotate the camera Tilt it down and pan it over a bit. So we're following him, but Spidey is still leading the camera. It's just a bit delayed and then spacing wise Right here, so this feels better in terms of your arcs Yeah, arcs and timings better It's a bit of a hitting a wall. There's so much power coming out That's cool. And then right here You flatten again versus Fills more like like that. There's something right through there where your arc gets flattened And on this I would probably also bring up the Chest and the head a bit higher like he's hunched over fine But then now he jumps in a hunched way and then stays in that hunched way just feels a bit weird So to me I would look at Giving this a bit of a straighter look in the body and the head just this moment of explosion Choo and then around here you start to hunch over because then he starts to turn and Then as you do this this roll I Will bring the head sooner so the head leads if you want to keep the arms like that. I Still feel like you want to do a bit of a He does this and arms a bit straighter and you straight it's a bit of a nicer pose and then You know that could be a bit further out on the side You know one leg a bit offset there potentially already and then as you start to roll you bring in those arms down for a Little bit of a swing, but you lead all of this with the head turn That's why it feels still like he's just kind of dying It's very out of control because there's nothing that here that feels like he is initiating this It's a bit of a move there in the head, but again, it feels a bit too late It's also a bit fast and this drop feels fast. Yeah, there's something in your spacing where Hey, it's flat here Then it's okay and right through there. It feels like you're suddenly accelerating gets really really fast Right there. It's a bit too fast. It's slow that down. It's almost like I'm super picky here, but again, it's a spider-man is a bit more Like your whole thing is a bit more realistic. So I wouldn't go That's what I'm looking at in the more realistic timing Where even this could have like a frame or two more But the big thing I would do is check this arc Change your poses there, especially this here Like he's in this pose and again with that bent back here, it just feels like he's not comfortable There's no there's no elegance to it and then through all of this It feels like this is just kind of a flat plank turning Which makes this look very stiff and blocky and then that speed at the end is a bit funky That's a bit where to the fingers out. It looks like he's looking at his At his fists there his hands like to be or not to be It is very fast. So to me, I would first fix the speed of it It's a bit. It's fast and stroby and if you Pan and tilt over the camera less. I think it'll be okay Like he will be Probably exiting frame, which I think is okay. You can totally exit frame So we don't cut on this where we're still in frame and then that's only we're here And I think it will help the cut to have him leave leave the frame Makes sense Hold on she shot too. I Hope I fixed the funky into the motion that you mentioned I look at this animation for hours that I can't tell he's stuck in here. He's falling yet I clean his pose at the end of the shot. I think it's a bit weird. Let's see. Oh It is a bit weird just because we're traveling this way, but he's pointing this way So let's watch this here. It's just fast and this was too fast But I think your drop is a lot better and there's a cool bit of a With a couple things it has a feel of a wobble, which is kind of neat because The mechanics of suddenly him holding on to this and accelerating and adjusting and then swinging That makes it a bit more real, which is cool. But the tricky thing is something Stuff like this where his legs are kind of moving as Almost as one unit to the left and then over to the right. I like the offside on the legs there That makes it more real which is cool Well, when you have both legs moving like this together that makes it again a bit stiff and blocky a bit rough So give this enough time framing wise and spacing wise that if you do something like this That bigger move here You don't only stick here that legs would come out a little bit and swing back. There's a little some fine tuning of the legs Well, I guess Alexa has a problem there I should meet Alexa before I do. Critiques! That's too fast. So this swing Let's say at five more frames six more frames, and then he swings this way. So keep this orientation This is weird going this way pointing this way while going this way and even give this arm this Two more frames It's a bit fast and it happens right when we get to the shop. So we're missing it I think two or three frames will help give this a less of a snappy feel Or we can read it more Probably by the time you're here You can also bring those legs like one of them a bit further up a bit straighter one is a bit more curled up and Over there just again just to give that momentum somewhere to go So it doesn't feel like you're doing a move over this way and then it kind of stops and then it's stiff Then I don't mind this pose just because it's that quickly The change in the tightness and everything that keeps him a bit That's out of control. But it's a bit of an interesting realistic change. But then by now You can bring those legs together just it's a bit more elegant and then here That's fine for that offset and opening it again And then here I would you know again point them this way and they can bring the legs down together again It's a bit more elegance there And the reason why I'm saying all this is because it gives you also contrast in terms of Legs together legs apart legs up and so on and so on versus now they always have kind of that same same width and Then if you watch if you go through all of this here See that there's always kind of the same giving this the whole Kind of a rough blocky feel because there's no contrast in leg poses if that makes sense Shot three pushes legs a bit and change the focal length of 45 True camera with those before so make it a bit longer. It's fine And with his right hand a bit up when he falls And his legs avoid 20 hold on he's here It's just same again, you could have him just that last time I would give him here so you start a Couple of things right start here But end here which makes this a bit more interesting. That's at least some sweet right-to-left movement So it's not so stuck in that in that axis here Which in also looks like he's following that building axis there that line So it's okay to move from here to here and then globally move him Rotate him so that he's knees are not pointing this way his face is everything's kind of almost pointing this way So you want it that it points a bit this way so it helps the right-to-left move legs are cool Changes are cool. I would still offset the arms more. They're kind of open at the same time There's a bit of a change in the pose, but not by much so you could easily do where You know, he has a bit of a like that leg is up that the body could be twisted so that his right side is a bit more behind him And then that leg is up. It's the last thing that let's go of the web and in that way You know you have something like that potentially again. I'm horrible at drawing but gives you a bigger offsets For that and then that is fine. Once you get to here For the jump Again, this feels a bit You just have now a faster move down So the couple things that Bring that wrist down a bit more since it has a nicer curve. It feels a bit broken Again, if there's anything you can do here in terms of the what's it called the Geometry, but then you're hitting right you're hitting that last moment where he's down and then The arm goes up with the body that there's no overlap where He's done the body is done with that move, but then Arms will continue to go and then you would have an overlapping thing of the body going up arms going down Obviously not that far down, but you need a bit more Overlap and impact on that arm the fact that arm goes down and stops at the same time as the body goes up Makes this too stiff and too post-to-pose It's a bit too sharp as well This feels good how you swings over to that gotta get rid of that stiffness there Then you can look at a different hand pose as well. We're kind of stuck in this Lego figure claw pose throughout there. This seems very similar. I mean, it's interesting stuff there like overall Post changes are cool. I like what the body's doing here at the end But it still has the thing that I mentioned before where it comes up Quickly and then stops a bit too quickly and I'm looking at you can look at that line here Shoo, and then it rotates out of that line. So if you do some Let me try something here. You're hitting this line here See you now with onion skinning I can scrub and you can see how that line of the shoulder stays put So we're going up really fast and then and then we lock there Pivoting off of this side and you got to go and continue a bit more with the up You gotta ease into that a bit more that's that transition feels like fast and then like this It's kind of fast and a bit of a moving hold and you want to give this a bit something like this Or you want to be a bit slower and you slow down so that you don't have that harsh transition So that transition is a bit funky and then that pivot off of that shoulder line wise here You can put a pin in here and it pivots off that shoulder. That's a bit weird That's the only thing I would tweak Should be fine. It's a short chop, but it just stands out For venom I made him smash Spider-man and then he jumps. I think the jump is not right yet. I would love to hear your thoughts I think my main impression when I saw that a Couple things I think it's a cool idea But because it's so off-screen here cutting out We miss it. We miss that whole thing. So what I would do is then I would Rethink the shots, right? You're gonna hate me for this, but I like your idea, but then you can push this So what you would do? Let's do this right reframe And I need to change to this drawing tool so I can go off screen here So this would be your thing Then imagine you got, you know venom would be over here and because of that because spider-man a is smaller It makes that relationship more impressive. You have this big creature here and small spider-man So it makes him less heroic and he's you can kind of sense the danger because he's suddenly so small And because there's so much room now when the fist comes down and then Spidey jumps off We see more there's more room for the fist to land and there's more room for spider-man to get out Right versus and let me just go Back up here to your safe Go by your safe frame there. There you go. Bye Compared to this where they're visually I mean, he's taller. He's even cutting frame here breaking frame You know the same level so imagine you got a puny little spider-man there that would work And then the thing about this is that This kind of goes There's an offset in this arm, which is cool Then why by the time you hear I feel like the chest and arms are kind of moving as one piece There's no break up when the body goes down. There's no drag on the head and Then you easing into this it feels like a very soft hit especially through here This is very soft and then there's no impact tremor going through his arm or into the head It is all feels very spliny and soft Again, I like the idea here. It's just we completely miss it because it's just so edgy here on the frame And then if you look at the jump as He goes down. There's more pressure on the legs. I will bring that foot down compression and then on that So like this and then by now I will bring in that leg closer this link leg closer Then here they're closer against it's a bit more of an elegant Quick exit and leg extension versus here. We're already bent again. It was a bit weird So, yeah, that's thought on that and then here it gets super weird. So Like this makes zero sense It's just kind of floating around unless you know, you have an arm up and you're telling us It's it's on the web and you can see it and maybe you zoom out a bit more so you can see the hand the face a little bit of a Spider web and then the web up straight. We just understand this was right now He's just pivoting in the air and floating down this makes zero sense So if you can make this happen so that he's finishing his jump Like a regular jump. I mean, he's a bit more super human rights. You have a bit of a higher jump and then arm out This hope happens so quickly too. Again, I like the idea that we're cutting out on this I think I just gotta give this more time The tricky thing is with with something like this because it goes to camera and he's basically acting to camera Like we're almost like an implied POV of venom It makes it's always very flat in terms of the changes meaning you jump up and come towards us in that flat access There's no room to jump this way Because you don't want to go right to left and then suddenly have the The web come into our face so that let right to left and then straight. That's weird so because of this idea, right, you would have to have something where He's potentially a bit further away. So you have a bit more rooms. It's not to cut off here You can start them lower comes up like that momentum of that jump is still there from when he got out of here Then you go whoop like up and then as you hold that Momentum that apex there then you can change his pose So into that hand forward and then Net into the spider web into our face But the physics of this Still has to work to jump up and down But it's a cool idea and I like this like this more than the punch. I Saw somebody's from the spider-man ps4 game. I really liked the ending for the first amazing spider-man film Or we split the web to the audience Okay, and you worry about it being too long. I mean this it has a bit of a you know I can ending vignette like oh, we're like you're telling a story Which is cool, but if you're you can easily and Here and this is just part of the sequence. We're showing this We're showing that and that yeah looking at this here This could be cool impressive shot to end to this big creature It's all about venom and that's the reframing like I like I said, you can easily end it there But then you end on like a holy crap moment versus that Because this seems a bit funky like I said in terms of the physics and mechanics And if you're struggling and it takes so much time it'd be easy You can always you know revisit this whole thing later and add it when you feel more comfortable You have more time and you've learned more and you can easily just end it here Because you're pretty close on these pretty close like these The shots are very very close, right to me it feels more like There's a lot of work left here, and there's still work left here And it needs to be really good because this is the opening shot Super close on this super close on this super close on this very close on that this pretty much I mean this could be all final very very quickly so Concentrate on that concentrate on that All right. 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