 This is going to be a great sister to sister. We ask this question, can you be a lover of God or a hater of God? Is it that simple? Oh, great question. And also, a season that I am beginning in, is there such thing as empty nest sadness? Oh, Amy, you don't look very sad. Well, I'm not, and sometimes I am. Check it out. Welcome to Sister to Sister. You have joined a great panel here. We are five opinionated women of God. And we bring the questions that you send us. We bring our hearts right to you on a plate. And I am excited that Angela Madden is with us today. Angela sitting in for a flow. Welcome. Thank you. So excited to be here. Well, you're not going to be too excited if you can't jump in. So they talk a lot just so you know. Just so you know. All right, jump in. This first question Amy talked about in the promo. So I'm giving it to her. Listen to this. You wrote this. My kids are out of the house. I don't seem to know what to do with myself. I have a career. I'm involved in my church. I have a good relationship with my husband. Kids are doing well. They're living independent lives like we taught them to do. Good for you. And I have these moments of overwhelming sadness. Amy, do you really? This really hits home right now. Because I like all of the eagles in the nest. And I love when we're all together. I mean, that just fills my cup. And so right now, like right as I'm sitting here right now, my son is away on his senior trip because he is stepping into that full independent young man that we raised him up and trained him up to be. And I am not going to lie. I had tears this week. Actually, I feel a little raw about it right now because he's such a joy to have around. He's kind, he's helpful, he's a hard worker. He's obedient. Thank the Lord. And that's not the same with all of my children. I'll just say that. But there's just something so sweet about him. He worships in the house. He just brings such a peace, his presence. So honestly, I'm really going to miss him. But this is what my husband and I are saying. We transition well in every season of life. So that is the soundtrack I will play over and over. I transition well in every season of life. I will enjoy when they come home and I will enjoy when they leave. It will be a blessing. I think Amy has a really good perspective on that because I think one thing you have to remember is that your empty nest is somebody else's everyday existence. And there are people that, you know, you have gatherings to look forward to. You have grandkids to look forward to. You have things that you have to look forward to. There are people out there, people watching right now, they don't have those things to look forward to. That's, their existence is maybe a much more lonely one. Their empty nest has been their whole lives. And so we have to put that into perspective, I think. Sometimes those lonely moments and those sad moments, we have to really think about how we've been so blessed with what we've been given and put that into perspective. It's okay to be sad, but think about all the blessings we've had and the blessings to come and kind of put that into perspective and be thankful for that. Roxy, what do you think? I went through this. You still go through it. And what helped me was Proverbs 31. The woman says, she smiles at the future. So to pull me back when I'd walk through the store and I'd see a mother with two or three little boys, I'd three boys, two girls, or I see them along with two little girls. I'm like, oh, those days. And then a sweet thankfulness. What does Thessalonians say? Be thankful in everything. A sweet thankfulness, like Corey said, that I got to experience those days when they were young. They're hectic, they're wild, so much is going on. But you remember the sweetness. So if we have a sweet thankfulness, thank you for those days. And I'm smiling at my future because you have something good in the future, Lord. That's a great word. Angela, what do you think? Do you have young kids or kids? Yeah, I have little kids. And so I'm kind of in a different season, but I love talking about it because I remember my mom going through that and it was very difficult. And for me, it brings me back in this season to those very present moments when it is crazy and it's busy. And I'm like, oh my gosh, it's another day. You know what I mean? And being able to say, I only get a short time with them. My husband just last night shared with me a statistic. He said, they say you spend 92% of your time, the time that you get with your children when they are home. Once they turn 18, it's only that last 8%. And so it is just mind blowing. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for that. It's very rich. My son's 18 and he just grabbed it. It's so rich 8%. Can we do a different statistic? It's a quality 8%. It was her husband's. Yes, that's my husband. To stay present in the moment. But I want to just address the woman who wrote the question to us. She said, what do I do? I hope that you got what the sisters are trying to explain to you that what you do is treasure what you have. And that's a good, and the memories that you have. You're a great example, actually. Because I watch you. You build friendships. You have circles of friends. You play racquetball with them, church with them. Come over to the house and swim with them. And that help fills your cup. Plus, to tell you the truth, the empty nest really doesn't always stay empty because they return. Here's what to do. Cook, and they will come. But that's George. OK. So this is a good question, too. The Bible says you're either a lover of God or a hater of God. Is that really that simple? Roxy, what do you think? I'm going to plunge into this and kind of call it the Roxy rundown. You know, John 3.19 says, those who love evil, who practice evil, love the darkness. But the light has come into the world. And why do they hate darkness? Or I mean, why do they hate the light? The light came into the world was Jesus because he exposes the deeds of the darkness so that if you want to come into the light, this scripture says, practice truth. Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life. And you will come. That's his leading out. He leads you out of darkness. Sometimes it's not quick. But if you are practicing evil, then yes, we hate the light. We hate the Lord. But if we practice truth, we will come into the light. We will come into God's love. So he has that simple. Anybody else? Oh, yeah. So I don't think it's that simple. We love God or hate God. OK. If I were to have a graph here, and here's 0, here's plus 10, here's minus 10. This is atheist, far from God, hate God. Center is I'm saved. This 10 is I'm Holy Spirit filled on fire, ready to take on the world. And there is such a thing as seed. You're planting seed, seed, time, and harvest. It is absolutely a process. And so just because somebody, they're not saved yet. But you don't know that a year ago, they denied God, hated God. But now they're curious. And they're meeting with that friend. And they're having a dream here and an open conversation here. And they're getting a little bit closer to being saved and born again. So it absolutely is a process. Oh, I like both of the answers. Cory. I mean, I was really having trouble. And I mean, somebody here can maybe help me. The question said the Bible says you're either a lover of God or hate God. Where does it even say that in the Bible that you either love God or hate God? There's lots of references where you can love something else. But I don't have a specific reference in the Bible where it says you either love God or hate God. I actually think it's way more often, and it talks about being lukewarm, where God spits you out when you're lukewarm. I think Satan uses it way more when you're just kind of nonchalant about God. I think that that is a much more tool of the devil than a blatant atheist or hating God. It's just like when you're just kind of like, eh, you know, I'm fine. I believe in God. But it's just kind of like, it's not that important to me. I really think that that is a tool that is used much more often where people think they're fine. I'm fine coasting along. I'm fine. Like, I don't hate God. I think that is where you have a lot of lost people. And that is something that you have to really deal with. The person that wrote that might feel that way. Angela, do you have something? You know, I just, as we talk about this, I love all of the diverse perspectives, and I think that what's really important is I always go inward. You know, and so as believers that we have to continually ask ourselves, if hatred or love towards God, on that scale, where am I? I like that scale. You know, I must be burning hot for God. And if there's a play, oh, you know, he's pretty cool. Like, you know, you've got to make your way to that burning hot space. I don't want to get where Revelation talks about if you're either hot or cold, but lukewarm must spit you out. I want to be one who is known as a deep lover of God in every way, in every moment, in every action. I think you are. That's good. I really do. I really do. I love you here. All right, good. All right, now I'm going to go on though. Here's the last question in this segment, and it's so good. You wrote this, what would cause you to question someone's friendship? Cory, you have lots of friends. Have you questioned some? Oh yeah, of course. What, what caused you? Well, I mean, first of all, I'm not somebody that like quickly lets somebody in. Like I have a lot of walls. So I think it's, you know, somebody that has to be loyal and trustworthy and honest. And so when someone kind of proves themselves that they are that, then, you know, they have to continue that. If someone is somebody that's not honest, somebody that, you know, it's got to be, and I have to be that myself too. You know, it's the same thing I look asking for someone and a friend, I have to be that too. Someone that is constantly choosing others or themselves over you, that's a difficult thing in a friendship, a gossip. Gossip is the big one for me. Because if you find out that someone that you think is your friend and they told something that you would talk to them in confidence, or how about this, when people gossip, they think they're praying for you. But really, they're gossiping about you. And if they're willing to talk about your other friends to you, then they're certainly willing to talk about you to your other friends. Yeah, I've gone up so bad. Anybody else, what do you have, girl? Yeah, well, getting onto that gossip, that's Proverbs 16, a devious person, that's what they are. Spreads dissension, a gossip separates close friends. I want to get into something, though, that I experienced, and that's Proverbs 17. A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity. When I went through something serious, and I got calls from people, sometimes I didn't even expect, that showed a true concern in adversity. When you are going through difficulty and someone is there beside you, encouraging, listening, there's nothing like it. I can't forget it. Because you remember those times in your life that are really serious or dreadful. You remember when Kennedy died, if you're old enough, when he got assassinated, or when 9-11 occurred, you remember where you were. In adversity, you remember where you were. And when that friend comes alongside of you, there is nothing like it in the world. They are Jesus to you. Not that you elevate them to that place, but they take on the love. They're the hands, the feet, the eyes, though whatever part of the body of Christ that you need at that time. Wow, that is a friend beyond measure and you better treasure it. That's good. What do you have girls? Boy, I'm just thinking through all the different layers of friendships, all the circles of friends, all of the, you know, I think when you open yourself up to somebody as a friend, it is a vulnerable place to be in. And it is an intimate place to be in. And sometimes we mess up, like all of us. So I think there has to be an element of, you know, I'm expecting her to be something that she's not right now. And I had this in a friend and it was disappointing and discouraging, you know what I mean? And then I thought, what am I doing? She's not my source, you know what I mean? So it's like this, we gotta keep it in balance. And we've got it as much as possible. Operate in the fruits of the spirit. Operate, let the Holy Spirit get over things. Forgive, but to me though, a deal breaker is lying. Like if you're lying, I just, I, there's, there's no trust there. Do you have a quick answer for me? I love the adversity. I think that is really good. And for me really, I like to see if they can celebrate big wins for people who are close or those who they don't aren't really in relationships. And if they can, I'm like, you might be all right with me. Aww. You know, you know what's so good? So celebrate. I think what's good that we talked about is the question was, what would cause you to question someone's friendship? But I think we brought to the table what develops in a great friendship. And all of you who are watching sister to sister on a weekly basis, you are my friend. And we'll be right back right after this. Welcome back, friend, because you are. I appreciate it so much. We have more questions for you. And listen to this one that you sent us. I don't know who wrote this, but this is good. My work interferes with me going to church. Should I quit my job? I know, just go to another service. But let's hear what the other girls have to say. Seriously. What do you think? You guys are pastors, you all run churches. What would you say? I don't think it's that black or white. Do I quit my job? I mean, it doesn't work, he doesn't eat. So you need food on your table to eat beyond the bread of life that is coming from our living word. And so it's always a balance. All things in life are a balance. And that's what I've realized. I was in real estate for years. And of course weekends are our busiest time. So I found for me, I would go to that earlier service and then I would make sure I didn't have appointments until it was over. You know, having a conversation with your current work, if you're in a career or a job that you really love, if you've had that conversation with them, it can be so simply resolved. I need to start later on Sundays. You know, I think that a lot of times within our Christian circles, we want such a black and white definitive answer because we really just want control. I think it is a black and white answer though. I think church is a non-negotiable and in our house it is a non-negotiable. And I think that our children need that example that you don't have sports that come over church. You don't have activities that come over church and that you don't have a job that comes over church. And my kids know that when they fill out that application the Sundays are an X over it. My husband had a job where he worked like 60 to 80 hours a week. He would get up at 4 a.m. on Sundays, go in and then come to church to the 10 a.m. service. It was a sacrifice, but God honored that sacrifice. And so you don't pick a career where you're gonna have to constantly work on Sundays. You just, it's just, you know, I understand, you know, maybe you get saved after you already have this career, then you say to God, God help me figure this out because God is calling us to be part of a body in a church. And I think that it is a necessary part of our walk. And so I just think, you know, if there's, you know, a temporary time where you have to do that, you beg the Lord and you say, God, help me get out of this so that I can be honoring your call to be at church. That's really good. Judah and I were having this conversation last night as we were driving home, you know, 45 minutes from a soccer tryout. And I'm thinking, wow, Judah, this is a long drive. This is a lot of practices. And he's like, you know, mom, my faith is so strong. I could even miss church, you know, every now and then for a game or, you know, so we were kind of buffering that around. And I said, well, Judah, like let's just go with like what the word says. Let's get our feelings out of it and our passions out of it, you know, forsake not the assembling of yourselves together. Jesus went to the temple as was his custom. It was customary for him to go to the synagogue. Those planted in the house of the Lord will flourish in the courts of our God. We are a connected part in the body. So I said, so basically churches here, sockers out here, let's, let's just, we're going to work soccer around church. Amen. Hey, I'm going to go to this last question and it's about Exodus 34, five to seven. And the lady writes, I'm confused. And since I talk so much all the time, you read it. The scripture, it's really long. Oh my goodness. It's really long. Okay, here we go. Here we go. I already got this. Then the Lord came down in the cloud and stood there with him and proclaimed his name, the Lord. And he passed in front of Moses, proclaiming, the Lord, the Lord, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness, maintaining love to thousands and forgiving wickedness, rebellion and sin. Yet he does not leave the guilty unpunished. He punishes the children and their children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation. Wow. Roxanne, fill me in. All right. I'm going to try to give the Roxie rundown again. How I look at this, there are two consequences to sin. For believers and unbelievers, Exodus, Ezekiel 1820 says, the soul who sins will die, eternal death. The soul who sins will die, neither the child or the parent will suffer guilt. It sounds contrary to the scripture. Ezekiel says the child or parent will not suffer guilt of the other. All right. That is the soul. When we go to heaven, we give an account based on Christ's righteousness, not our own. So there's eternal judgment with the soul. Now I look at Exodus 20, there's earthly discipline for the Christian. If you are a Christian and you confess Jesus as Lord, it says on there, your teach, it says hate punishing those who hate to the third and fourth generation. In your fleshly body, if you violate the commandments, if you cause others to hate the Lord, you could cause hate to the third and fourth generation. God's going to discipline you here on earth. No, it's tough. So there's a discipline, there's a reward in heaven, a judgment. And for the Christian, there is a discipline on earth. Amy, you have a scripture you said. I do because we're talking about the God of love and the God that will punish. And I wanna bring awareness to the old covenant versus the new covenant and what Jesus did because I firmly believe that Jesus took the punishment of our sin and shame and guilt upon him. And the scripture is in Romans eight, three and four. It says, for God achieved with the law was unable to accomplish because the law was limited by the weakness of human nature. Yet God sent his son in human form to identify with human weakness. Clothed with humanity, God's son gave his body to be the sin offering so that God could once and for all condemn the guilt and power of sin. So people that are waking up every day under the weight of guilt and sin and punishment and then I screwed up today. And so now my kids are gonna suffer. That is, it's a lie. Jesus came and when he said, it is finished. The veil was ripped. Sin, the power of sin and hell and shame and darkness and death was broken over our lives. And we now live as a son and a daughter of God. Well, that's good. I mean, both of you were talking about this Exodus scripture, which is very confusing to people. It's confusing to me. And I'm like a Jesus girl on this panel. And so I'm looking this up in my hippie Bible because I have a hippie Bible from the 70s to think it maybe say something a little easier. And it doesn't, it doesn't. So I love what you said. I love what you said. But Jesus also said when the blind man, he healed the blind man, the disciples had it in their head. Did their parents sin or did he sin? And Jesus said neither as to what Amy's saying, but his was for the glory of God because Jesus brought forgiveness in the new color. So as I'm looking in my hippie Bible at this, I come across Exodus 20 verse five that says, when I punish people for their sins, the punishment continues on the children, grandchildren, great children. That's what we're seeing, right? On those who hate me. But listen, it goes on to say, but I lavish my love upon thousands of those who love me and obey my commandments. It's like the Kerry Job song that their blessings to our thousands of generations. And so as we discuss this and I love everyone's point of view, I mostly want to get across to you that God will lavish his love on those who love him and obey his commandments. We'll be right back right after this. Wow. I feel really fired up about some of these questions. And I just wish, listen, if you ever see me, if you ever see us, let's sit down and let's talk about some of these questions. They're so good about, you know, the empty nest and can you be a lover of God or just a hater of God? Is it that simple? And what about God's love or God's punishment? Wow. The bottom line is for all answers. We hear opinions, we hear quotes, we hear thoughts, but we go to the word of God, which is the absolute truth. This is our bedrock, the word of God. So let's look at this scripture in Psalm 63.3. Read it with me. Because your steadfast love is better than life, my lips will praise you. I love what it says in the message Bible. In your generous love, I am living at last. All you have to, if you really wanna live, receive God's love. If you really wanna have life and life abundantly receive Jesus, don't go another day without making Jesus Christ the center of your life, the Lord and savior of your life. Jesus absolutely changes everything. Guys, what an incredible program today. It was, and you know, we have another scripture that we end sister to sister with all the time. And it goes like this, as iron sharpens iron, and I go, so does the countenance of a man or a woman. In my case, a sister sharpen the other. And then I add this line, you see family, friends, my sisters make me a much better Kathy. We're so grateful that you're here today and every week we are sister to sister.