 I'm the comic weekly man, the jolly comic weekly man, and I'm here to read the funnies to you happy boys and hotties. Yes, boys and girls, it's comic weekly time, and here I come right into your house to bring a little fun and happiness. Right out of the pages I've popped the comic weekly straight into your living room, your friend the comic weekly man, the jolly comic weekly man. Little Miss Honey, how are you today? I'm just fine, thank you. How are you? Oh, I'm just fine too. And I've got a riddle today. And another one? So the only way to find out is to ask me. Here it is. To make sure his tail is wound around his nose to get the flies off. No. Am I warm? No, not a bit warm. All right, I give up. Why does a dog turn around three times before lying down? Because it. So that's why a dog keeps turning around and around and around and around. That's a very funny riddle that is. I thought you'd like it. I certainly do. No, I'd like it if you'd give me the funny. Walk the comic weekly? Yes. Very well, I'll read that in just a moment. But before I do, let's listen to this nice man. The comic weekly, and on the first page, Big Ben Bold. Magic words for the music, please. Very well, my lady. Faint and punch and dodge and twist. It's a knock-out blow from Big Ben's fist. Big Ben Bold, a famous boxer, is on a trip around the country challenging the local favorite in towns along the way. He's offered $1,000 to any boxer that can beat him. In a western city, he finds himself in the ring with an Indian named Chief Tallpine, who's been fighting unfairly. And just as everything seems to be going against Ben, an old Indian chief stepped out from the crowd and stopped the fight. He's ordered Chief Tallpine to fight Ben Fair and Square Indian style. Today the gloves are taken off the two fighters, and the slippery grease has been wiped from the body of the Indian. Chief Tallpine says to Ben, Okay, Bolt, my honored grandfather says we've got to finish this scrap Indian style. Ever fight Indian style, pal? Well, I know. Spider Ben's trainer says to Ben, Hey, let's slip this tomahawk. He wears 1,000 bucks for staying three rounds. And get out of here, at least what I scamps, huh, kid? No, Spider. We fight. Last picture top row, Ben and Chief Tallpine square off. Face each other with bare hands. Chief Tallpine circles Ben, and seeing that Ben isn't used to this style of fighting says, Ah, you're confused, eh, Bolt? It's simple. All you have to do is try and stop me from rubbing your face into a solid foot of mud and gravel. First picture bottom row, the chief lunges at Ben. Ben knows that once the chief gets his arms around him, he's through. He cocks his right in a desperate effort. And Chief Tallpine drops unconscious to the ground, knocked out cold. The old Indian chief holds up his hand and says to Ben, If you were of my tribe, I should call you he who cast hand like bolt of lightning. The issue has settled my people. Go to your homes in peace. Spider says to Ben, Yeah, then let us not tarry neither of Ben. Last picture, a short time later, Ben and Spider get in their car, ready to continue on their tour. Both are wearing an Indian's headdress, which was given them by the old chief who has admired Ben's way of fighting fair. As they start off, Spider says, Hi, Ben, when can we dump these turkey helmets? Ben waves goodbye to the old chief who's waving to them. Well, not until we get out of town, Spider. The old chief's waving at us now. And off they drive to a new adventure. Yes, it was. And it was wonderful too that that old Indian chief made Chief Tallpine fight fair. Yes. He likes Ben because Ben is honest. Yes, you be here and I'm sure you will find another interesting adventure. Now? And I know you're right. So let's turn over the page to page three. Ben was trying to capture the castle of Amid. That's right, the castle was on a high hill and it was impossible for the small group of knights with Belle to capture it in a fight. So Belle had a wonderful idea and he got the people who were in the countryside who hated Seagrid Holm because he freed them like slaves. And he got these people to dig a tunnel so that the water flooded underneath the special part of the castle. Yes, Belle directed the river so it would flow underneath a part of the hill the castle was built upon. And last week part of the hill began to slide away and I wonder if the castle castle will fall down on the head of Seagrid Holm and these men I hope. Well, let's find out right now. Here we go with Prince Valiant to the days of King Arthur. Hack it, break it, Grey Malkin and Quintz. Music Romantic for a Fair Fair Prince. On the castle wall, Seagrid Holm, who was defying Belle and his 20 men, shouts insults to Belle who stands at the foot of the hill. And then suddenly, the wall sways and cracks beneath his hand. Last picture top row, as the dust settles, Belle draws the singing sword and enters the ruins. He has some unfinished business with Seagrid Holm but before he can move there comes another ominous sound. The tower seems to be moving slowly. It sways and then the sound swells into a terrifying roar as the whole fortress melts into the crowd of dust. The castle of Seagrid Holm has fallen in ruin. Music It looked like he was standing right where the castle fell. And the head. Yes, it looks as though it had. Although there might be a section up on the hill behind the tower that still stands. Well, we'll find out about that next week. Now? Now is the time for Robin Hood. Well, let's turn over the page and see. Yes, there's Robin Hood. And you remember, last week, Robin Hood was walking through the forest with his father and his father was killed by an arrow. And he was one of the men of the mean sheriff of Nightingale. Yes, and then Robin saw that Redgill was trying to kill him too. So at self-defense, Robin shot Redgill. And then some of the others of the sheriff's men came riding through the forest and they saw that Robin Hood had killed Redgill and so they started to chase Robin Hood. Now I wonder what'll happen to him. Well, let's read now and find out. Let's go with the story of Robin Hood. It's Mary, Mary, England in days long ago. Time now for Robin Hood's music. Hi-ho! Robin Hood doesn't dare show his face in any of the cities or towns for fear of being arrested by the sheriff and his men. But word of what has happened to Robin and his father spreads around the countryside. There are those who are sympathetic to Robin and hate the sheriff and his rough men. And soon other brave lads join Robin Hood in Sherwood Forest to resist the ruthless new sheriff. One day one of the sheriff's men is tacking up a sign in town. A sign which offers a reward for Robin's capture. One of Robin's friends, named Alana Dale, strolls through the crowd and sings a little song to tease the sheriff's men. Oh, Robin Hood, don't hunt the deer that in the woodlands prance but off time shoots the sheriff's men by sorrowful miss chance. The sheriff's man turns and snarls. This sentence about Lori will hang your Robin Hood minstrel. There's 40 marks on his head. Alan answers, He rubs the rich to help the poor. A most unusual practice. And now that Robin's been outlawed, he needn't pay his taxes. Meanwhile the sheriff and his woman brutally enforce the new tax laws. The people are so poor from paying taxes that some are forced to go hunting for food. At last picture top row, several poor men are captured for shooting the king's deer in the forest. One of the men says to the sheriff, Delacey, I had no meat. Your men have taxed me out of house and home. First picture bottom row, Delacey says, You know the whereabouts of the outlaw Robin Hood. Lead us to him and our reward will pay your taxes thrice over. The man answers, I'll not betray Robin Hood. No, no, no, no, no, no. Angrily the sheriff shouts, Bring them in. We'll make a public example of them in Nottingham Square. As they move off through the forest last picture, a strangely hooded figure watches. As the poor men are cruelly forced to follow the stern figure of the sheriff. Yes, he takes all their money with his taxes. Well, no one's food. Yes, no wonder. Even though the sheriff is cruel to them, though, they're loyal to Robin Hood. And that's because they know that Robin Hood is a good man. Well, next week, I'm sure we'll find out. Now let's turn over the page, though, and see who's there. Oh, look, everybody. And we won't waste a minute. Here we go with Donald Duck. Say the magic words with me. Squeegee, squeegee, squeegee, squeegee. Let's have music to better quack, quack. Little Dewey, Donald's nephew, is having an argument with a tough boy in the neighborhood who's poking his finger at Dewey's chest and yelling, Your uncle's the biggest chiseler in town. And Dewey yells back, He's the littlest chiseler. Your pop's the biggest. OK. My pop is big. But your uncle is bigger. OK, prove it. Oh, you want proof, eh? Yeah. Last picture, top row, the tough little kid socks Dewey in the eye. OK, there it is. First picture, bottom row, Dewey sits in the ground holding his sore eye. The tough guy starts to walk off. Dewey yells, Uh-huh. The hidden run type, huh? And he leaps to his feet and runs after the little tough guy. He grabs him by the shoulders. Uh-huh. I got you. The tough guy turns around and winds up. And then, last picture, the door opens and into the house comes Dewey. Donald, who doesn't see that both Dewey's eyes are black, says cheerfully, Aye, Dewey. Dewey slams the door and snaps. Hi, Uncle Chisler. Now Dewey is in so much pain, he's not going to fight any longer. Dewey gives up and says, Uncle Donald is a chisler. Well, now it's time for Dagwood and Blondie. Oh, and I know that. All right, you find the page and I'll read Dagwood and Blondie in just a moment. But first, here's that nice man again with something interesting to say. Now here we go again with Pucked for Comic Weekly. And on the first page of the second section, Dagwood and Blondie. Magic words for the music, please. Very well, my lady. Ram-a-foo, ram-a-fum, zim-zam-zombie. Conjuring music for Dagwood and Blondie. A salesman for kinky can-openers is talking to one of the ladies on Dagwood Street. Madam, I'm serving a new type of can-opener. Oh, just what I need. I'll take one. Oh, thank you, madam. And he walks down the street saying, I love my job. Oh, what a joy it is to deal with these pretty little housewaves. They're so sweet and coined. By the time you can get to the last picture top row, he's showing his can-openers to another lady. And she's saying, Oh, how nice. Yes, I'll take one. Oh, thank you, madam. And down the street he goes again. First picture, second row, he says happily. Oh, the women look so cute with little girls in their hair and wearing pretty little aprons. And then he walks up to the Bumstead's house. Yes, sir. I wouldn't trade jobs with a king. I'm happy with my work. He rings the bells. Inside the house, Dagwood, who is painting a table, last picture, second row, exclaims, Oh, now what? He opens the door, sees the salesman standing there. I'm selling. No, I don't want any. But the salesman tries to show Dagwood his can-openers anyway. Well, we have to. It went upon Dagwood, socks the salesman. And I say, Well, they get into a big fight. Hey, help it! Will you get out? Dagwood tries to run to the house, but I say he slams the door shut and the salesman sticks his leg through the door. Then he shoves through the partly-open door. Well, they come in two sizes. Dagwood sees the salesman's leg sticking through the door and he gets a diabolical idea. He looks at his paint pot, then the salesman's foot, and then he grins, I'll prove man's superiority over salesman. He jerks off the salesman's shoe. He sock, and then takes his paintbrush, first picture, bottom row, and starts to paint the salesman's foot. Oh, stop! Stop! A devilish look comes over Dagwood's face, and he says, I hate myself when I get these beauty-shy ideas. The salesman feels the wet paint on the end of his toes. Stop! And then the brush tickles the bottom of his foot. And then he feels the paint all over his foot. Oh, no, no! And then Dagwood opens the door. The salesman looks at his foot and sees it covered with paint. Last picture, the salesman comes into the kinky can opener company, wearing one shoe and one foot covered with green paint. He holds up his green foot and he says to the manager, I'm resigning. I'm going into some business where husbands are. And broke the salesman's pretty red heart. Oh, that's right. It was a good way to get rid of him, though, wasn't it? Yes, Blondie. They do, they do, they do. Well, now look at the bottom of the page. There's Roy Rogers. Oh, yes, read that, please. Very well. In the bottom of the first page of the second section, Roy Rogers, king of the cowboy. Hi-yip-hi-yo. Now here we go with Roy and Trigger. Hi-yip-hi-yo. Lawyer Carstairs and a young Tuffy named Shanks have been trying to steal the Box K Ranch from Teddy Knox, whose father had just died. When Roy had intervened and prevented them from forcing Teddy to sign and turn the ranch over to them, Carstairs and Shanks went to meet the stage coach that was bringing in a buyer for the ranch, a man by the name of Laurie. Laurie turned out to be a beautiful girl who had come to buy the ranch in answer to a letter from Carstairs. Carstairs wants her to sign the bill of sale at once and give him the money, but the girl insists on seeing the ranch. Third picture top row, Shanks snarls. Sorry, sister, but I can't waste time. You got the papers to my ranch, so I'm taking the money now. She slips out of the saddle. Quickly, Carstairs and Shanks mount the two horses. Last picture top row. Carstairs exclaims, Great car, Shanks. That funnel shaped plow looks like a tornado. Yeah, it is. Come on, let's head for a crooked cave. And they ride off, leaving the girl standing alone in the prairie. Wait! First picture bottom row, at the Box K ranch, Roy sees the approaching tornado and exclaims, Hey, Connie, if that tornado rips through here, Teddy knocks his ranchers as lost as if Carstairs and Shanks stole it like they planned. Make for the cyclone seller! Help! Eddie and Connie run for the underground cyclone seller and safety. Roy seeing the girl in the knoll runs for Trigger. Hey, there's somebody up on that knoll. I'm going up there. Come on, Trigger. Come on. Help! Faster, Trigger. Faster. Tornado's gaining on us. Roy gallops up to the girl, pulls her up on the saddle beside him and sees the tornado was overtaking him. And we can't make it back to the ranch mist. We've got to find Sheller before that twister hits. There's a cave. Roy heads Trigger for the cave and safety. I believe it is. When you think... Yes, and he may ride right into the end of Shanks' gun. But we'll find out next week. Now let's go over the page. And look, there's Flash Gordon. Oh, yes, there's Flash Gordon. And this is so exciting because Flash is captured by a man named Poptre the whole world. As I run as master the secret of controlling a comet, a huge star, and he's speeding the comet faster and faster at Earth hoping to destroy the Earth. And lastly, Flash tried to escape from the room where they were kept prisoner and those scaly little men caught him and they were going to throw him overboard into the flames on the outside of the comet. My eye... Well, let's read now and find out. Hello, Mr. Gordon. Let's have music for heroic play. The ugly little comet men are about to throw Flash into the flames of the comet. But Plama, Pyrrhon's assistant, tells them to bring Flash to Pyrrhon instead. Reluctantly obeying Plama's command, the comet men abandon their plan to hurl Flash overboard from the insulated space sphere. Moving close to Flash, the girl whispers, I'll go to Pyrrhon. I'll try to persuade him to spare you. Do not lose heart. A few minutes later, pursuing her devious scheme, the Wile E. Flama hastens to Pyrrhon. She tells him he must listen to her that there is nothing to be gained by killing the Earthmen. And she tells him she's positive she'll be able to draw from Flash the information Pyrrhon needs about the Earth's plans and weapons for opposing Pyrrhon's comet power. Pyrrhon nods his head in agreement. Flash picture top row, Flash is brought to Pyrrhon. Pyrrhon falls in with Flama's plan and boastfully displays to Flash the cosmic power controls that are steering the blazing comet toward a fiery collision with the Earth. While Pyrrhon struts, Flash maps his strategy. As the comet man turns toward the machinery, Flash sees his chance. First picture bottom row whirling on the unsuspecting guard, Flash snatches his flamethrower, but the scaly little comet man struggles fiercely and the hands of delay give Pyrrhon time to whirl around and bring his own gun into play. A heavy beam of short range cosmic rays spurts from Pyrrhon's weapon and strikes Flash with stunning impact. As Flash falls unconscious, the guard leaps forward and disarms him. And last picture, as Flash is dragged away, Flama proceeds with her treacherous plan aimed at resting control of the comet from Pyrrhon. Realizing Flash's value as an ally, she pleads with Pyrrhon to spare him and says slyly, let him live. He'll be valuable as a hostage. Yes, that was his big chance to overcome Pyrrhon and control the comet itself. You think so? Well, that's something we'll find out next week. As long as Flash is alive, there's hope. Yes, people. Well, we'll find out more about that next week. Now? Now is the time for Dick's adventure. It certainly is. So let's turn to the very last page of Buck the Comic Weekly. I'm very weak that Dick had been helping and that's an Indian chief he was. Yes, yes. Dick had found Tecumseh wounded in the wilderness and was taking him to a doctor at a fort down the river. And then, as they were standing at the edge of the river watching some American soldiers who were coming in the distance, all of a sudden some Indians came out of the forest where they were and surrounded Dick and Tecumseh. Yes, they were Tecumseh's friends and among them was a white trapper. I wonder what'll happen to them? Let's read and find out. Here we go with Dick's adventures. Say the magic words with me. Rigidipakazakazik. Let's have music for adventurous Dick. As Dick stands among the Indians who surround him and Tecumseh, he sees the white trapper among them and he notices that the white trapper is a British courier spy. Dick knows that in the courier's pouch there must be important messages. Suddenly, Dick leaps for the pouch. Hey, what's this? He gets it and starts to run away. Last picture, top row. Stop him. Next picture he sees by the husky Indians and the pouch is snatched back by the Britisher. You young whippersnapper. Last picture, second row. Another Indian rushes up with a warning that a strong column of American soldiers is drawing near. Dick is quickly muzzled. First picture, bottom row, so he can't warn the soldiers. And he and the Indians lie silently hidden as the Americans march by. Hours later, when the last Yankee soldier has passed, Dick is tied to a tree and left in the wilderness alone as the Indians led by Tecumseh go away. And as Dick stands in the wilderness alone, tied to the tree, he thinks that Tecumseh, whose life he saved days ago, has now treacherously arranged to have Dick's silence permanent. For last picture, two wolves come out of the forest and move slowly toward Dick. Yes, and to think that Dick was so close to the American soldiers and couldn't say a word to them. Oh, there, Tecumseh. I wonder if he means to leave Dick there by himself, because that's ungrateful because Dick and safety comes his life. You're right, it is ungrateful. Yes. But we'll find out what happens next week. Now look underneath Dick's adventures. There's Rusty Riley. Oh, yes. And remember that Coast Guard officer arrested that Blackie Kirk and now Rusty and Tex and Peter safe again. I wonder what they'll do now if they're still a long way from home. Well, let's find out. Here we go with Rusty Riley. Gallop and run till the road is dusty. Give us music for his horse and Rusty. Tex, Pete and Rusty and the horses are at a little farm a short distance away from where the Ulfrator had been run aground by the two crooks, Blackie and Captain Crump. Tex is saying to the boys, yep, it's hard to believe where Blackie Kirk and Captain planned to erected Ulfrator from the very start just to collect insurance from these horses. They had him insured for an enormous amount. Rusty says, so that's why they didn't want the radio man to send an SOS. Pete asks, well, what do we do now, Tex? Tex replies, well, I've owned Mr. Miles. Oh, he's funny, burned up. But he told me to wait in this farm till he talks to Colorado Colby. Rusty says, well, Clem says that the Coast Guard won't let that ship go until there's some kind of an investigation. So the horses will have to be shipped some other way. After a conversation with Colorado Colby, Mr. Miles learns that a dealer about 10 miles from where Tex and the horses are will buy the horses, but he can't take them for about a week. Mr. Miles relays this information to Tex. And a little later at the farmhouse, Tex is saying to the lady of the house second picture, bottom row. My boss, Mr. Miles, phoned Mrs. Jones, wants to know if we can stay on here with the horses for a week. You'll pay you well. What do you say? A man who was in the house of Mrs. Jones snaps. I'll answer to that, Mr. Excuse me, but who might you be, sir? Me? My name's Marlowe. And Mrs. Jones does what I tell her. I advise her to do. And I'm advising her to let you pasture those horses just one week and no longer. Meanwhile, at the far end of the pasture, last picture, Rusty and Pete have been wandering about the farm near an old shack. Pete says, Hey, hey, hold it a second, Rusty. I thought I heard somebody crying. Rusty answers. And so did I, Pete. He sounded like a kid. And I think it came from that shack. I mean, there's something new and exciting that's been happening. Well, you never know. And I don't like the way that Marlowe spoke to Pete. He asked us if he wants him to get away from there. It does look like that. And it all adds up to something mysterious, doesn't it? Yeah. Maybe we'll find out more about it next week. Now, that's all the time I have. But before I go, here's that nice fellow with some more interesting information. Well, honey, and all your boys and girls, I've got to go now. All right, Mr. Streak. Okay, that's a date. And a date with all your boys and girls. Be sure to meet me with our little friend Miss Honey next week when I read Puck the Comic Weekly. For I'm the Comic Weekly Man. The Jolly Comic Weekly Man. I'll be back to read the funnies. To you, happy boys and honeys. Don't forget, boys and girls, see you all next week. Your friend the Comic Weekly Man. The Jolly Comic Weekly Man.