 Okay, ready to watch another patron requested movie. Oh, yeah, almost human by Umberto Lindsey. Sounds like it's a great Italian whore flick. Yeah This isn't a whore movie. I'm welcome to another edition of frankly forgotten whore movies But before we get started, what are we drinking? We're drinking Changseng Yellow Turban IPA. They know your name That's not good. Today. We're gonna be covering 1974 is almost human by Umberto Lindsey And this is a patron request requested by Douglas Draw. Umberto Lindsey is directing tons of stuff Just to mention a couple of the more whore themed things he's done. He did cannibal ferox furrow furrow and ghost house Which I like to cover one day for a trash or treasure Henry Silva is in this and he's a huge actor. You've seen him probably in everything He was an alligator and the original Oceans 11 from 1960 I think and the Manchurian candidate. That's right Yeah, Thomas Milan is in this too, and he was in Oz Which is one of our favorite showcase shows the first HBO show that really kind of knocked TV on its ass Yeah, Jfk and traffic just to mention a couple others Almost human starts off with this gang of thieves and they're gonna rob a bank and our main character here Julio is in charge of being like a driver to the getaway driver He's parked in front of the bank and this cop comes around I gotta see your ID So instead of trying to fit his way out of it Fucking kills the cop right there in broad daylight sabotage this robbery before it even gets going Yeah, so the guys come out They actually do get away, but they have to like kidnap this kid ditch the kid inside the road at the end They do get away with it, but they're pretty pissed off at Julio for kind of fucking things up They take the boots to him they beat the shit out of this guy Julio It's just a two-bit piece of shit criminal goes to break into the cigarette dispenser and his cop kind of sees stabs a cop Kills him goes to his girlfriend's house pretty much rapes his own girlfriend Well, her sick mother is all in the other room dying like what a piece of shit He's looking for money and she doesn't have any like I'll give you Napoleon. Yeah So After raping his own girlfriend he drops her off at work Yeah, and he sees that her boss is fucking loaded and his boss has this daughter He comes up with this great plan to kidnap the daughter and hold her ransom He hires a couple of goons to help him out with this a bunch of idiots because he's an idiot So to go along with this plan you need even bigger idiots, right? Steals his own girlfriend's car after she explicitly told him she couldn't have it to get some guns to Conduct this kidnapping he goes to this guy and owner's papa talking business and there's a downpain It's kind of renting the gun. It's just kind of neat. You know you rent the gun You bring it back when you're fucking done as long as you didn't kill anybody with it He doesn't want to pay the price it cost to rent these guns Who just fucking guns down papa and his wife? Julio and these two idiot thugs tracked down the girl that they're gonna kidnap this make-out spot They pop a bunch of pills they put a bunch of rocks under the tires of the car They go to get the girl Julio is all goofing around some serious things. He's all put his face on the And the boyfriend tries to be a hero guns the kid down to the machine gun The girl takes off. She's gone girl ends up coming upon this big house in the woods gets inside and the people that are inside They're kind of having a bit of a drinking party, you know He's asking them for help right they kind of take her in and okay We're gonna look after you Julio and the two idiots get into the house. They didn't lock the door They proceed to terrorize All these people that are in the house Julio all makes that guy give him an equal opportunity favor basically Equal opportunity blow job They don't show how the guy got out of it Oh, I don't think he did and then it shows everybody all strung up on that fucking chandelier like Get them all the way up there. That's gotta be one strong fucking chandelier Don't They're all naked and everything to the hero of noise upstairs and Julio goes to check it out and just shoots it ends up being a child Everybody's distraught at the killing of this kid and Julio just can't take it anymore He just fucking they just gunned down all the people that are hanging on this chandelier to like Jesus Inspector Walter Grundy is on the case now He's also getting royally pissed off at seeing a lot of these petty crimes happening And nobody's ever getting caught for them right or somebody does get caught They get released right away right the rest following all of these crimes these murders that Just so happen be committed by Julio and his fucking gang Julio ends up taking his girlfriend out for a bit of a ride What would you do if you heard me say that I killed three women two men in a child? She'd be like what I'd say you're joking. Yeah. Yeah, would you turn me in? Yes I would right away pull up to like this nice spot that on this cliff that overlooks a lake shows her the Paper the headline of all these people that that are killed right away. She starts freaking out He opens the door jumps out of the car and let's go the clutch and the car goes right over the cliff with her Inside Julio is willing to do Anything they end up taking the boss's daughter to this boathouse to kind of keep her while they devise a plan or a scheme To ransom her and get the boss to give him all this money That's where we're gonna end the plot if you want to see what happens with Julio and his fucking idiot gang And the inspector who's on the case keep watching So the first thing we'll have to mention about almost human is that it's not a horror movie No, you might have noticed this is the first non-horror movie. We've really covered death weekend Is the closest really as far as being just kind of more of a thriller, but it was requested So we did it. Yeah, and it was an interesting watch, you know to watch an Italian Crime thriller good solid fucking movie It does kind of keep you on the edge of your seat and it's gory It's probably gorier than a lot of horror movies. Yeah fucking murder in this. Yeah, Thomas Milan Basically carries the entire movie. It's a very strong actor and you need to be for a movie like this He plays the perfect perfect piece of shit not even human exactly He's almost human it does a very good job of making you hate his guts Kind of reminded me of an Italian like Quentin Tarantino movie the heist the thriller And a lot of dialogue the only negative thing I really had to say about this movie is Those heavy dialogue scenes are a little kind of draggy this character is so fucking crazy You have to keep watching to see what the hell he's gonna do next yeah because he can literally do anything all the settings for This movie are very cool. Like there's not one boring setting. They're either like elaborate night rich Yeah house nice looking or it's a complete dump interesting choice of setting really well nothing is mundane Yeah, exactly and it kind of mirrors the characters Julio is a piece of shit So a lot of times he seeks out these shitty looking places to take everybody seek refuge Yeah, he's a piece of garbage the guys clearly got no taste setting reflects the characters. Yeah. Yeah The pacing is is actually pretty good in this movie But like you mentioned like when it gets into the heavy dialogue scenes it does slow down That's about probably the only bad thing about it But for the most part it's pretty action packed starts off full gear with that bank robbery crazy Car chase in the beginning of the movie does a good job of like getting you invested right away Then when you know how big of a piece of shit Julio is you can't shut this movie off You have to see what's gonna happen to this fucking guy He's gotta pay for his crime that leads us into the dynamics of the characters too, right? Obviously you have Julio who's a piece of garbage But you also have all of the side characters that sort of they kind of feed him. Yeah almost, right? Nobody really wants to stand up and stop him. You kind of get mad at everybody else too It's like fuck you're right there. Just shoot him in the back or something. Yeah, just stop them Yeah an amic between all the characters is very interesting because you start off with Julio's low guy in the totem pole Just shit kicked out of him for fucking up the robbery even though. He's the lowest guy in that totem pole There's still people below him. Yeah, he can hire and to do his stupid fucking crimes, right? So it's like doesn't matter how low you are. There's someone lower exactly and then the development is great too Like how his character develops and the it's all ego though. He's not like he's rising in power No, his ego is but he isn't yeah The crazier the situations get and that he puts himself into the lower he goes Yeah, right more of a piece of shit He becomes to try and achieve all this. Yeah, and his cronies he hired. They're like oh Yeah, these off the fucking this guy's off the fucking rails like they don't necessarily agree with everything he's doing Yeah, but they go along with it, which is interesting. I really like that dynamic This movie also has a couple of really good twists at the end kind of two major twists We're not gonna give them away, but there's twist one and then you think the movie might be over then there's twist number two Yeah, yeah the music for this movie was done by Ennio Morricone and master himself but He kind of shit the bed on this one a little bit it falls into the very generic Yeah music generic 70s Action yeah, yeah music. It's not Memorable really it doesn't really strike any yeah any feeling in you not like Good in the bad and the ugly or any of those masterful fucking scores. This is like a paycheck. Yeah, exactly Yeah, you just did it quick and that was it this movie does a great job of making you feel just fucking Yeah, cuz you're just watching horrific crime after a horrific crime Is he gonna get caught is he gonna get away with that you fucking might he might just get away with all this You know yeah, and that's that's really what you're waiting for. Yeah throughout the whole movie It's like fucking somebody catch him. Yeah, somebody get him. He needs to pay does he yeah I don't know we're gonna find out this movie is definitely a commentary on Crime yeah justice and people paying for what they're doing this guy's done so much awful stuff What sentence could you deal with this guy to make him pay for this? Yeah, is jail time enough? Yeah, or you know maybe not is death good enough. Maybe that's too quick Yeah, like it's definitely a commentary on that the judicial system and how everything gets doled out the victims too And all of this right you know they don't get their justice even though it's not a horror movie It is a fucking interesting watch. It's entertaining. It's shocking uneasy Yeah, and it has something to say about fucking crime and criminals justice even cops having their hands tied The morals that the cops have to live by too. It has to make them follow a line Maybe I don't want to walk that line anymore. Yeah, exactly So yeah, if you want like a good crime thriller that's like in the line of Tarantino type movies death wish may not be horror But definitely check out almost human by Umberto Lenzi and until next time keep drinking