 narcissistic fathers if you are watching my videos it's likely you had a narcissistic parent and that parent may have been your father the narcissistic father enforces strict obedience to his authority at the expense of your personal freedom which may leave you feeling trapped in an undesirable situation because they also lack warmth they're very unfriendly they're invalidating they're extremely offensive and insulting they don't give you the proper care or attention which affects your self-worth and your self-esteem it makes you feel like you're not good enough which sets you up to meet a narcissistic partner at least once in your life you may feel this need to win over the narcissistic father you may wish to persuade them to accept and support you when this is something that shouldn't need to be earned but it sets you up to develop this mentality of feeling that you need to do a complicated and difficult series of things in order to make them happy which leaves you feeling like you're never good enough when your father is supposed to be your role model your father is supposed to be an example to be imitated you are meant to emulate their behavior example and success but most of the time the narcissistic father doesn't even notice you their regard for you is dependent on whether you do what they tell you to do if you do exactly what they want you to do they will be there for you but if you choose to be your own person they can be very invalidating they're also very uncomfortable with the emotions of their children they will shame you for having emotions which can also cause their children to become narcissists because narcissism is characterized by shame narcissists are shame-based people but if you are watching my videos it's likely that you are not a narcissist you may feel uncomfortable with your reactions feelings sensations and memories you may have difficulty with relationships you may find yourself always seeking other people's approval and you may take excessive measures in attempting to correct or make amends for an error weakness or problem you may try to make lots of money so that you can prove the narcissistic father wrong if you have a narcissistic father you may constantly find that you are experiencing shame because you understand that things in your family were not okay and you may often blame yourself you may feel like you don't want anyone to know about your family but there's no reason for you to feel humiliated or distressed for it because you are not the creator of your family system instead you need to practice radical acceptance stop fighting reality let go of any bitterness that may be keeping you trapped in a cycle of suffering and just recognize that you know who they are a narcissistic father can have very significant effects on the child's life they can cause significant psychological harm to you which may leave you feeling like you don't have any respect for him because narcissistic fathers have difficulty controlling their tempers they could not admit their own flaws and that lack of accountability is then what destroys everything in their lives which then alienates you it isolates you and leaves you feeling estranged healthy fathers want their children to be better than them they want you to be more successful than them in everything it is a natural desire but for a narcissistic father that is the last thing they want to see when they feel like you are becoming better than them they get very envious they get very bitter and resentful and then they just want to shut you down when a healthy father would be proud of that they would encourage it because a healthy father would be happy for their child which would then cause that child to always respect their father the greatest quality that a healthy father could possess is the ability to set aside their emotions and then use their logic reason knowledge and experience to dictate their actions instead of letting their emotions dictate their actions a narcissistic father's actions will always be dictated by their emotions they have difficulty controlling that anger envy and resentment they will only control it when there are other people around because their image is very important to them but when you're at home they can be very decent indecent because they're very dishonest they hide who they really are narcissistic fathers do not act like men and that is why you may not respect your father because they didn't give their best they allowed their impulses to run their life which is why you may even hate your father but this is something you need to overcome you may not love what they do but that doesn't mean that you should hate them the opposite of love is not hate the opposite of love is indifference it is to have a lack of interest concern and sympathy for them which is why hate should eventually become indifference because although they may have disappointed you although they didn't live up to your expectations although they didn't use the qualities they had to be someone you admired and respected if you hate them it will only hurt you in the end especially if you are the scapegoat child because the narcissistic father doesn't care if their scapegoat child hates them they may even want you to hate them so instead of hating the narcissistic father be indifferent the reason why people hate is because deep down they secretly love and admire something about that person there is actually a very fine line between love and hate which is why the opposite of love is indifference the opposite of love is to let go of everything you expected them to be and to not let them affect your life thank you for watching I hope this video resonate with you please like comment share and subscribe if you would like to donate my PayPal link is in the video description coaching inquiries you can email me at coach at an art survivor at a UK thank you for watching and I'll talk to you soon