 Hey there foundation staff, my name is Sherman and welcome to Skip Dictation Live. If you're new to the channel, Skip Dictation Live is when you hang out with me while I record the SCP audio that we do. Today is a very special occasion. In the last week we got our second Patreon patron, that is two Patreon patrons, that is double the one that we used to have, so amazing, top score, high five team. And our first Patreon patron backed request. So we're going to cover that request, I'm not always going to do it like right after I get it, but for the first request from a Patreon patron, I am going to do that. And that request is New Job. So we're going to do the tale New Job, everyone's favorite tickle monster episode. So let me pull up the live chat here, hey Asimovs here, hey Asimov, first to the scene, excellent. So I've got the chat up in live, I've got Audacity up in live, let's plug in the microphone, that's kind of important to recording things, can't really record things without a microphone. Dev Conley, hello Dev Conley, welcome to the stream, alright. It's a Sunday show so I don't expect, I expect we're going to see some different people than we usually do, because typically I stream during the week. It's going to be very fun seeing who shows up on a random Sunday afternoon evening slash whatever time it is in your time zone. In California it's 3.35 so that's a beautiful late afternoon stream, the lighting's just perfect, I've got the big glowing sun behind me so I can see the keyboard. And now I turn off Audacity because I just plugged the mic in so I have to turn it off and turn it on again, just try turning it off and on again, love me some IT crowd. Mic check, mic check, one two one two, mic check one two one two, perfect, okay. We got mic check, mic check, we've got the chat is live so I can see you guys' and now alright, perfect. And yes, remember supporting the channel via Patreon has benefits, if you check out the Patreon and the linky things, one of those benefits is that I put your requests higher above everybody else's because if you're funding the channel you get priority. That is the quickest way to my heart is through my wallet because I love food and I love eating. So we're going to build this channel but first we're going to build this story. New Job is the name of today's story and for the art of it I'm hoping that I can get a girl voice for part of it. It opens up with a terminal login for Dr. Isabelle, Isabelle, yeah, Isabelle Collingwood. So I'm going to try and get a girl voice to do her like read-in. We don't necessarily need it, I could do it in computer voice but I'd rather have a girl do that just for a little more immersion. Most of it is said by an O5 so that's what I'm going to be working with. Which by the way I typically voice change the O5s so I've got to decide if I'm going to voice change the O5 since it's so much all the O5 talking. I don't know if I actually want to voice change it because it's just him the entire time. But we'll decide that along the way, I'll do it in my voice and then I'll figure out which sounds better in editing. So yeah, oh, hello true man's world, welcome to the stream. You're a new subscriber, I saw you subscribe earlier today, welcome. What I was in a, did a boat turnover, I'm so confused, I don't understand, I don't understand Asimov, what I guess, oh thank you true man, I appreciate you saying my content is pretty good, hopefully we will just continue making it better and better as we go on, especially if I can get into that live action stuff I want to do, but live action requires a budget, this I can one man show. So I'll be checking on the chat in between takes, otherwise here is take one of new job, oops, 10 seconds of silence for meditation and noise correction, my wrist popped when I moved it as a joke, 10 seconds of noise silence, got it, noise reduction confirmed, all right, new job, round one, foundation terminal online, oh didn't like that, I cracked a little bit, let's do that better, foundation terminal online, please enter logging information and password, Izzy Collingwood at foundation.scp, alone beneath the weeping willow, hello Dr. Collingwood, you have one new message from O5 command, this message is for senior researcher Isabel Collingwood's eyes only, unauthorized access will result in mandatory amnestic treatment, demotion and possible termination, do you wish to continue, yes, access to this message requires a multi, oh multi, multi, it's multi, multi, let's try that again, ah, backing up, backing up, backing up, backing up, my daddy taught me good, all right, here we go, access to this message requires a multimodal, I keep saying multi instead of multi, access to this message requires a, I cracked my shoulder, let's try that again, access to this message requires a multimodal, multi, multi, multimodal, multimodal, multi, multimodal, access to this message requires a multimodal biometric ID scan, submit to scan, commencing facial recognition scan, do not smile, identity confirmed, commencing retinal, retinal iris scan, oh no, I did not delete it everything, I did not delete everything, you, okay, we're good, we're back, everything's fine, nothing is ruined, this does not look good for Homestal Wana, identity confirmed, commencing retinal iris scan, do not blink, identity confirmed, commencing palm print scan, place right hand on pad, identity confirmed, scanning hand for implanted, implanted, implanted, I think I did that last one wrong, identity confirmed, but I'll just match the identity confirms with the other identity confirms, that way it sounds like computer because the computer is consistent voice, it doesn't change every time, right, so not implanted, implanted, that's a completely different word from that not word, that is a fantastic question for supporting the channel beyond Patreon, if you imagine Patreon is let's say you signed up for $1 a month, that means that at the end of the year you ended up devoting $12 to the channel, that's awesome, that is $12 more than the channel would have had before, in the same token, um, um, um, sorry got distracted by Asimov with, from high school theater which is the story of my life, in the same token if you buy a t-shirt the profits from that are about somewhere between $5 and $10, so t-shirts are the equivalent of $1 a month for like 5 to 6 months, so t-shirts are a good way to support outside of Patreon, which is why I do both, what you end up with is YouTube advertising revenue, I, uh, okay so now we're going to get a little in-depth business so you can kind of learn about how I'm doing this, I watch the juggernauts of YouTube like Philip DeFranco and MatPat for Game Theor, Film Theory, and you got to have alternative sources of income besides YouTube ad revenue, because ad revenue goes up and down and things are demonetized, if you want, if you saw my video feed of all the little dollar signs that say I'm monetized, those get monetized and demonetized several times throughout a day, it'll be like the video is demonetized and it's re-monetized, so you never know if your video is going to survive, especially when we're doing creepypastas, horror, there's a lot of curse words, so it clicks off and on, and at least right now, I am currently, uh, most of my videos average about 100 views in the first day, but you can't call YouTube and request a review until a video has a thousand views, and a lot of my videos don't have a thousand views yet because I'm not that big, so I can't adjust the monetization, but I know that MatPat does, uh, ads through other sponsorships, uh, Philip DeFranco, Farad DeFranco, Farad DeFranco, Philip DeFranco has the Patreon group and he sells t-shirts, so between the two of those and ad revenue, he has three different ways to keep supporting himself, so when ad goes down, the other two kind of keep him propped up, and if we want to do these kind of, like, live action videos down the line, it's going to take a lot of money because camera crews need to be paid, uh, I can one man show this and it's a blast and I edit the sound and I do the voices and I have some friends who will like spot me a voice over for free because they want to like practice and have fun with it and they're lovely people and my friends are so good to me for doing that because they're essentially working for free the way I'm working for free, but I'm in charge, so, uh, so yeah, in that case we need to just keep building the channel as we go, t-shirts and Patreon are the best way to keep the place going, uh, whatever you can do if that's what you want to do, game on, in the mean stream, so yes, that great advertising moment, thank you all for asking me how to support the channel, that way I could advertise for a little bit, that was lovely, you guys are such good fans, uh, in the meantime, uh, let's, where was I on this reading? Identity confirmed. Identity confirmed, for what, Retinal Iris? Place right hand, Paul, um, True Man's World, uh, for your curiosity and all of your videos, uh, the first question is did you monetize your videos in the first place? I have not checked out your channel yet, but if you have monetized and gotten your, uh, what's the phrase I'm looking for? If you have activated monetization, which you can do after 10,000 views, then it's a matter of turning on the monetization and hopefully YouTube, like, lets it pass, so that's how that all works out. Identity confirmed. Identity confirmed for poem reading is where we're at. Scanning hand for implanted, alright, implanted, that's what I messed up. Scanning hand for implanted RFID tag remains still. Identity confirmed. Access granted. The time, date, and location of your receipt of this message has been reported to O5 command. Alright, we made it from the, uh, we made it through the computer text. Now we're onto the much easier text because it's O5, so I just got to put on my scary voice. Scary voice, scary voice. Alright, from O5 command subject. Okay, so here we go. Boom. Time for the spooky from O5 command. Subject 5999 clearance. Hello, Dr. Collingwood, and congratulations on your new appointment as SCP-99999's head researcher. One of the cushiest and most enviable positions in the entire foundation. SCP-999 is one of the few anomalies in our custody who will not only never attempt to harm you, but will actively try to save your life if you're ever in any danger. Through your initial, ah, not through, though your initial. That's okay, that was pretty good string, let's keep it going. Less mistakes, more doing good. Try not to suck while you read the thing. Though your initial reaction when receiving this assignment was no doubt elation, you may have thought it was an odd, ah, try again. Though your initial reaction when receiving this assignment was no doubt elation, you may have thought it was odd that such a seemingly low-risk position was assigned by the O5 counsel directly. If you had already heard rumors of this prior to your assignment, you probably thought it was mere nephatism. The O5's protecting their friends and loved ones by giving them the safest job possible. I wanted to do that again, I like that. O5's protecting their friends and loved ones by giving them the safest job possible. Actually, I like how that came out. Good, I thought I slurped it a little bit, but it sounds fine. Oh wow, six viewers now. Hey everybody, welcome to the stream, good to see you guys. Safest job possible. Unless you are so narcissistic to think that someone on the O5 counsel must be your secret admirer, you've likely realized that this is not the case. To understand why this is our concern, you need to know about 999's origin. You may have noticed that its file makes no mention of where it was discovered. This is a deliberate omission. If you're not familiar with the mythology of the Scarlet King, I suggest you read up on him. There's plenty of unclassified information on him in the foundation database. All that's relevant for now. Revolent is not the same as relevant. Paypal accepted. Yeah, if you want to paypal donation, I can make a button for that. Yeah, that would be very kind as well, as a mom. And then, hey, did you know? Yes, Sherman tanks. Yep, there's a once in a while when I tell people my name is Sherman, they go, Oh, like the tank. Or they go, Oh, like the general, General Sherman. Or they'll say, Oh, like the nutty professor, Sherman, Sherman, Sherman. Or they'll be like, Oh, like the Sherman Nader, because American pie haunted me all through high school. So yeah, there's a, that is one of the many things that people bring up. P Sherman, wallaby way all the time. Oh, you're Sherman, P Sherman, wallaby way 42 wallaby way. Is it 42 wallaby way Sydney? I think it's 42 wallaby way Sydney. Now that I think about it, that's pretty funny. All right. And go in here real quick. Because I got pinged in the discord server. Hey, Yossi pinged me from the discord server. If you're not a member of the site 42 discord server, that link is in the descriptions. We chill out and talk about scp stuff and help each other with writing. And we do cool stuff for the site 42 shows. It's good stuff to hang out in there. If that's a thing. New job by Patreon request. How did I come up with site 42, Jack? Site 42, I came up with specifically because 42 is one of my favorite numbers because of hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy. Hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy, the meaning of life, the universe and everything is 42. All right. And then do to do. Oh, wait. Oh, hey, check this out. Everyone say hi to Dilla gaff or Eugene, who is the best patron ever. That is the guy right there. This is his fault that we're doing this. Yay, round of applause for the guy Dilla gaff. He's the man. Okay, where was I? Where was I? All that's relevant for now. Oh, yes, I had to do one more thing. One more thing is what I was doing. Do do do. Going to the discord chat because I got pinged twice in discord. Once by Yossi. Yeah. And then once by a prospective new voice guest. So we're working on that. We're making friends for the channel to build up our voice requests. It's pretty amazing. Seven people but only three likes. Well, maybe, uh, maybe I've been off topic for too long and they're like, what are you doing, man? You should be recording things. What's a what's with all this sassin around discord servers? Right. So now we're here. We cut this back. Revolent. That's why I messed up. Revolent is not a word. Relevant, relevant. All that's relevant for now is that he is to the best of our knowledge, the most powerful malevolent entity. Oh, man, I was doing so good. Here we go. Try that again. All that's relevant for now is that he is to the best of our knowledge, the most powerful malevolent entity in the multiverse. A good number of our SCPs are either abominations born by the rape of his own daughters, or are the creations of mortals he empowered, either directly or indirectly. You've been with a, I don't like that reading. I'm going to try that again. All that's relevant for now is that he is to the best of our knowledge, the most powerful malevolent entity in the multiverse. A good number of our SCPs are either abominations born by the rape of his own daughters, or are the creations of mortals he empowered, either directly. Oh, I was so close. I'm going to keep everything up for, except for either. That last little bit I just stumbled on directly. Good. Here we go. Mortals he empowered, either directly. Oh, I can't say directly right now with a fancy voice. Directly, directly, directly, directly, directly, directly. When you're saying directly with extra emphasis, it grows a new syllable. Like if you say directly, you normally kind of say it with a K sound just like because you're casual, directly. But if you're saying it with enunciation, it needs to be direct, direct, directly, directly, directly, directly. Say it until it doesn't mean anything anymore. Directly, directly, either directly. Ah, stuck in my nose. It got stuck in my nose. Ah, the air got stuck. Oh, either directly or indirectly. Let me hear that that sounded either directly or indirectly. Yes, that was a good take. Oh, thank God. Yeah, if you weren't aware of what it's like behind the scenes, this is kind of what it gets like. You're like, well, that one word just doesn't want to come off your tongue today. All right, directly. You've been with us since you were a research assistant, Dr. Collingwood. In that time, I assume you've heard many rumors about some of the horrific things we do here at the Foundation that you've never personally witnessed. Perhaps rumors about an innocent young girl who was the victim of a satanic ritual and what we were forced to do to her to prevent an XK class end of the world scenario? Maybe you even heard someone whisper the words 110 Montauk. I regret to inform you that these rumors are true, or at least they were. A thaumaturgical cult calling itself the Children of the Scarlet King enacted a ritual wherein seven young girls became ethages for each of the Scarlet King's seven brides, allowing them to bear his horrid offspring. How they obtained the knowledge to perform the research. No, no. Not their ritual, this ritual. If you're new to the channel, you will notice I'm a perfectionist and I'm going to get the words exactly as they are to the best of my ability. I'm not going to futz around and fumble on words and put the wrong word in there if I can help that. Allowing them to bear his horrid offspring. How they obtain the knowledge to perform this ritual is unclear since all we ever recovered were handwritten notebooks. Superficial resemblances to some sarkic practices, thaumaturgy, human sacrifice, body mutilation, and forming a pact with a cosmic entity, has led some to speculate that the Children of the Scarlet King may have had some ties to modern sarkic cults. It's an interesting idea, but no concrete evidence has ever been found to link the two. Investigation into the matter is ongoing. As for the ritual itself, each birth caused more destruction than the last. The writing of the cult's priests predicted nothing less than the apocalypse if the, uh, draft. I was going to say the apocalypse itself, but it, that's not what it says in the article, so I was prepared to say that and it was wrong, so I messed up the intonation. The writing of the cult's priests predicted nothing. So we're going to back it up, put it together, take it back, go in here, and more destruction than the last. The writings of the cult's priests, uh, nope, that was bad. The writings of the cult's priests predicted nothing less than the apocalypse if the seventh bride gave birth, which could only be prevented if procedure 110 Montauk was performed without fail each and every day. To our seemingly great fortune, the notebook contained detailed instructions on how 110 Montauk was to be carried out. Did I say 110 or 110? I think I said 110. The writings of the cult's priests predicted nothing less than the apocalypse if the seventh bride gave birth, which could only be prevented if procedure 110 Montauk was performed. Oh no, I did it right, yay. Oh man, true man is starting to make that mad YouTube money. Oh, snit. Yeah, to monetize you have to activate an AdSense account. I love this phrase right here. Oh, oh, Jack, oh, Jack, Jack, Jackie boy, I see you pee. Indeed. Needless to say. We found this. Oh, we found this suspicious. This was suspiciously convenient, guys. It was suspiciously convenient. Loosen those lips. Giggity. Needless to say. We found this suspiciously convenient. Why would they devise a countermeasure to prevent the very apocalypse they were trying to invoke? We needed more information regarding these entities. Fortunately, our archaeologists have unearthed numerous tablets, scrolls, and artifacts of the ancient debas. They were a sadistic and warmongering people who were granted unholy power and knowledge by the Scarlet King as a reward for the death and suffering they caused. One of the Daybite tablets in our possession found covered in dust and blood was a theogeny for the Scarlet King and his brides. It was quite informative. The information closed. Keep it going. Anziromontok was to be carried out. Needless to say. We found this suspiciously convenient. All right, and we are up to... Quite informative. Quite informative. Quite informative. The information that we... Oops, a little notification blingy block from the screen that I was reading. The information that we found most relevant to our situation was that the seventh bride was not like her sisters. She was never completely broken by her king's subjugation. Instead of monsters, she... Foundation terminal on... Oh, man! Dreadstick! It reset to the beginning so it started saying what I said before while it was recording. Dread! The information that we found most relevant to our situation was that the seventh bride was not like her sisters. She was never completely broken by her king's subjugation. I think I blended those words too much. She was never completely broken by her king's subjugation. The information that we found most relevant to our situation was that the seventh bride was not like her sisters. She was never completely broken by her king's subjugation. Instead of monsters, she gave birth to great heroes in the hopes that they would destroy her sister's children and overthrow their father. Thus far, all have failed, but by a vote of seven in favor, six against, admittedly more out of concern for procedure... Drat! Communism will win? Question mark? Will it? And what are we talking about? A cat and a... Why is there a cat? Who's mis-French's cat and honey the cat? I don't know what's going on here. I got a little confused. Is communism the one who wrote this, maybe? I don't know. I haven't been to the bottom yet. Six against, admittedly more out of concern for procedure... Gold is the communism piece. Excellent. Admittedly more out of concern for procedure 110 Montauk's lack of viability is a long-term containment strategy than out of empathy for the girl. The O5 council decided to believe that the seventh bride still remained unbroken and that her child would be an asset to us. At the risk of causing an XK class end-of-the-world scenario, SCP-231-7 was relieved from procedure 110 Montauk following the death of SCP-23-Fudge. I did say it the first time though, right? K class end-of-the-world scenario, SCP-231-7 was relieved from SCP-231-7. Cool. Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool. Good, good, good, good, good. So, that's SCP-23 death. So, that's SCP-23 death. Was relieved from procedure 110 Montauk. Was relieved is where we're starting. Hey, uh, Pabs, what's up? I see your messages. Of course, there's a 30-second delay, so I acknowledged you and now it's gonna make me wait to see what you got to say. So, that's pretty funny. But it'll come up eventually. In the meantime, I will tab to the Discord to see if anything's going on in there. Oh, I got good news. We might have a new voice on the team. That makes me happy. I will continue doing what I do. And it's gonna be great. Oh, and someone joined the Discord. Hello, whoever joined the Discord. Welcome to the Discord channel. All right, I'm going to be unveiling an SCP game like Pokemon Style. Oh, that'd be pretty neat. Uh, hey, voice people, that's what I'm here for. Site 42 does the things. Keep me posted on your progress. Uh, 2-3-1-7, in the world scenario, SCP-231-7 was relieved from procedure 110 Montauk following the deaths of SCP-231-1-6 and was allowed to give birth. SCP-999 was the result. Go ahead and read that again. Be sure you understand it in all its preposterous ridiculousness. The tickle monster is the child of the Scarlet King. We've been running a counterintelligence campaign ever since, which is why everyone and their mother thinks we've still got... Drat. Which is why everyone and their mother thinks... Uh, I do not have a pet fish, but I do have a pet cat. And what you're hearing is the automatic water bowl for Jacomo, the cat. So that's that trickling sound. Thankfully, the noise correction kicks in and takes it out of the recording. And, uh, Asimov, yes, that's right. Maze Angel, the one that's not hominy, right? We've been running a counterintelligence campaign. All right, see you back in a second, Pabs. We've been running a counterintelligence campaign ever since. Which is why everyone and their mother thinks we've still got a... I need that one to say it better. Which is why everyone and their... Uh, and there, and there. There's a D in that word. Which is why everyone and their mother thinks we've still got a prepubescent girl strapped to a rape rack in a bunker somewhere. Let them think that. Far better for everyone that the Children of the Scarlet King... Annunciate, Sherman. Annunciate. Use your mouth to form words with proper letters. Let them think that. Far better for everyone that the Children of the Scarlet King believe that they're playing us for fools than for them to know that there is a threat to their king. The girl herself is fine, by the way. She was cured of the trauma from her ordeal by SCP-999. At which point it was decided she could be returned to her family so long as they were all given class F amnestics, implanted with new identities, and relocated to a town at least 1,000 kilometers away from the Children of the Scarlet King's nearest known activity. On the insistence of the Ethics Committee, the family was also given a seven-figure payout as compensation for our repeated misdeeds against their daughter, as were the families of the other SCP-231s. I suppose it was technically malpractice on our part. I want to say that a little better. I want to say that one a little more, you know. I suppose it was malpractice on our part. I suppose it was technically malpractice on our part. In case we have any moles for the Children of the Scarlet King in the foundation, as far as anyone else knows. Drat. As far as anyone else knows. Technically, it was. It was very much malpractice. The thing you did was very malpractice. Ludic- ludicrously bad practice. Moles of the Children of the Scarlet King in the foundation. As far as anyone else knows, 231-7's family were killed in front of her as part of 110 Montauk. I'm sure you're skeptical. Are we insane? How could our sweet little tickle monster ever hope to dethrone a Lovecraftian horror of unparalleled might? Well, SCP-3999 is less than a decade old. It's still just a child, and nowhere near its full strength. Even so, its power is incredible. Even brief interaction with SCP-3999 can permanently cure severe depression and post-traumatic stress disorder. And more recent experiments have resulted in the complete reformation of D-class personnel who were previously unrepentant sociopaths. This effect is not chemical, but psychic, and one day it may grow powerful enough that not even the Scarlet King himself will be immune. The experiment with SCP-682 was most remarkable. Based on multiple Daybite texts, including descriptions from SCP-140 itself, we are reasonably certain that 682 is the offspring of the Fourth Scarlet Bride. If this is true, then SCP-999 is already strong enough to temporarily quell the malevolence. Oh, I was doing so good! I was doing so good, so good. Wait, did I say 3999? No! No darn it! Now I have to go back and find it! Drat! Okay. Twice. Man, I just love me some 3999. All right, let's put it on chipmunk voice and see if I can find it. There's one. SCP-3999. All right, let's see if I can just get that out of there by cutting it. SCP-999 is less- Oh man, no, that's a bad cut. Fudge, my fudge. Okay, now I've got a... How many times do I say SCP-999 in this? So many times. Just so many. There's so many 3999s that are supposed to be 999s. Okay, so we're going to scan real quick. We're going to scan, we're going to scan from the top. Here we go. Zoom out. Huh? Oh, shit. Okay, here we go, from the top. Stop what you're doing. Stop doing that. Stop making that noise. Okay, so from the top. Going through, going through, going through. Okay, so from here. SCP-999's head researcher. What the fudge, me? That was so many nines. That was more nines than I needed. Hello, Dr. Head researcher. And most enviable positions in the entire foundation. SCP-999 is one of the few anomalies in our custody who will not only never attempt to harm you, but will actively try to take advantage of just because they record your product, their funds, but it's less than the alive, leprechaun, or fatwaite. If you're not familiar with the mythology of the Scarlet King, the Scarlet King is it was known that you did not know about Dark concern. You need to know about 999's origin. You may have known it was Britain, but it was upon us, I mean, that it was right if us, only in the R.I.-born, poor, poor, or chusted. I am a writer at the moment, and in the big rich we were forced to do to her to prevent an XK-class end of the world scenario. Some scum, poor, hard to do, cold-witted and insane, but this is a lot. Take this, here's a verbal super-subdiction hack. Has led some to speculate that the children of the Scarlet King may have had some ties caught in an event until it didn't go set, but in the single safe. Only your 110 Montauk was performed without ever having to product 0K. Fish stayed up to prevent their work, and more me. Fortunately, our archaeologists have unearthed numerous tablets, scrolls, and artifacts of the ancient David, who were now sworn in by children. This R.I.-born, that we were the son of the Sneverty, in chief ministers' children, and overthrow their father. Our 76th concern for Procedure 110 Montauk's lack of item, then, and the inter-pocket, seven, was relieved from precincts of SCP-1, and was allowed to give SCP-999 was the result. It's a good one. That again, understand it, interest tickle is the Scarlet King running camps. One ex-beauty to think that better children believe that the rules then threat, is fine, by the way. Curate of the trauma from her ordeal by SCP-999 was decided cheekily so long as deadlocked one way by the tactics of many hours that has essence code. And I'll practice on our part. In case we have any moles for the children of the Scarlet King in the foundation. As far as anyone else knows 2, 3, 1, no as far as as far as Scarlet King in the foundation as far as the children of the Scarlet King in the foundation in the skulls for the children of the Scarlet King in the foundation as far as anyone else knows 2, 3, 1, 7's family were killed in front of her as part of 110 Montauk, I'm sure you're sceptical. I'm insane. How could our sweet little tickle monster ever hope to dethrone a Lovecraftian horror of unparalleled might? SCP-999 is less than a decade old. Alright, so let's mute that SCP-999. I almost did it again! SCP-999 is less than a decade old. Okay, let's cut that in. Paste it in. That takes care of one error. Let's keep going. SCP-999 can permanently cure severe depression. Oh, son of a fudge me. Even brief interaction with SCP-999. Alright, that's better. Okay, let's cut that. Put it up. And let's go back. So... Even brief interaction with SCP-999 can permanently cure... Alright, now I didn't actually fix the thing I did the first time, because I'm an idiot. In case we haven't... As far as anyone else knows, sold in front of her as part of your sceptical. Sane. Could our sweet ever hope craft in parallel... SCP-999 is less than a decade old. Okay, that fixes that one. Keep it running to the end. How could our sweet little tickle monster ever hope to dethrone a Lovecraftian horror of unparalleled might? Cool. Okay, we're back. We are on task. So we're going from then SCP. Alright, so... I'm caught back up. We're here. We got it. All of the wrong numbers that I said there, like a jerk, are now fixed. We're back on. So... Let's check out the chat for a bit. Yes, I said it wrong. Cha-cha-cha. Laughing. Cha-cha. How many times I said it? I fixed them. Thank God. How many times is it messed up? Like four. Uh... Mod on the Discord. Uh, Jack, remind me in a private message we'll talk about that. Um, and... Asimov... survives the perfect hearing. Ha. If this is true. If this is true. If this is true. If this is true. If this is true. If this is true. Alright, here we go. If this is true. Then SCP-999 is already strong enough to temporarily quell the malevolence of its own eldritch siblings. One day, 999 could very well be strong enough to permanently reform its family members just as it reformed human beings. It will not overthrow the Scarlet King by force, but with light and love and laughter that can brighten the blackest of hearts. 999 is not in reality a safe class SCP. It is Thaumiel. It is the best and really the only weapon we have against some of the most powerful hostile entities known to exist. By all means, doctor. Enjoy the relative safety of your new position. But do keep in mind that SCP-999 is not a mere pet that we fancy. I thought that it was gonna stop there, but it didn't. But do keep in mind. So, but do keep in mind is where we are now. But do keep in mind. But do keep in mind that SCP-999 is not a mere pet that we fancy. It is one of our most valuable assets and must be safeguarded at all costs. Its safety and well-being are paramount, and you are not at liberty to share this information to anyone without 5999 security clearance. As per protocol, unauthorized disclosure of level 5 classified information will result in your termination. This email will automatically delete as soon as you leave the terminal, so feel free to reread it as many times as necessary for all of the pertinent information. Take good care of our little tickle monster. The fate of the multiverse may... BUH! The fate of the multiverse. I'm gonna re-say that too. I wanna say that a little more. Charmingly sardonic. Glibness in that. Take care of our little tickle monster. The fate of the multiverse may well depend on it. Your secret admirer, if anyone... Admirer, admirer, your admirer. Admirer, so many r's. Admirer, admirer, your secret admirer. Your secret admirer, Lark. Your secret admirer, if anyone asks. O5, BOO! Message deleted. You have zero unread messages. Log off. Logging off. Goodbye. Hey, we made it! That is the end of New Job. That is a 10-minute tale right there. And thank the Lord. Thank you, Dillagaff. That is an easy one. Like, I'm not gonna do any crazy, fricking... uh... sound effect editing for this one. So this one's gonna come out real quick. That is brilliant. I am pleased with New Job. SCPTale. New Job. Save Project. Now... uh, I have... one more thing I wanna record. It's been 50 minutes. I wanna try and do one more. Cause I still got a little bit of time left. I got a nice, simple one that I want to attack. Uh, because, as I was told, it is a skip that is actually contained in Site 42. And that excites me. Let's put it on the roster. We're going with SCP 3999-J. Which is good, cause now I get to say 3999 as much as I like. Okay, so now file... Oh, let me add New Job to the list of pre-edit skips. That way I don't forget to edit it. Oops. Gotta keep the system unedited. SCP 3999-... No, that's not it. That's not it. I'm doing that one now. New Job. New Job is the new one. Got it. On the list, good job. So, here we go. File... New... Close... That, cause it's all saved and beautiful. And then... We have... This son of a gun. Alright. 10 seconds for meditation and noise reduction. Here we go. And we're clear. Okay, so... From the top. Ah, silly, silly, silly joke. Okay, here we go. Item number. SCP 3999-J. Object class. Keter. Special containment procedures. SCP 3999-J is to be contained at Site 42 in Specialized Containment Wing R. On the June 25th... Ah, sharks. I hate when the date is all out of order, so I have to say it weird. Cause it's people write days differently, but you don't say... You don't say 25 June, you say June 25th. On the 25th of June, 2014, Researcher James Tolaran volunteered to dedicate a round-of-the-clock support to containing SCP 3999-J. As such, Researcher Tolaran has been forbidden from leaving Containment Wing R under threat of lethal force. All visiting researchers to Containment Wing R must be cleared by Researcher Tolaran. Additionally, Containment Wing R has the following requirements. The enclosure must be cleaned daily. All organic matter is to be collected and disposed of. Soil linens are to be washed and all surfaces of the primary containment enclosure must be sanitized. Supplies and provisions are to be restocked daily. Researcher Tolaran should be consulted every morning to determine any necessary special provisions or supplies for that day. Crews are to remain on hand at all times to service and fuel all vehicles in the containment track. Mobile Task Force Lambda-3, codename Bounty Hunters, has been established to contain SCP 3999-J. In addition to standard armaments, Mobile Task Force Lambda-3 is to maintain an arsenal of eye combat laser guns. The indoor containment pool must be kept at 29 degrees Celsius, while the auxiliary containment tub must be kept at 40 degrees Celsius. Description. Stop for a breath. Oh, had a good run there. I liked that. That was nice. No stopping, no failures. Digging it, digging it, digging it. Set it on back. Specialized containment wing R. On the 25th of June, 2014, wing R. On the 25th of June... Good. Continuing on. And... Description. Ah, stuck. There we go. SCP 3999-J is an entity capable of causing an XK End of the World scenario at will. Accounts of its appearance are inconsistent, and it is believed that it can shape-shift. It can appear as a half-bay or half-man creature with many tentacles coming out of its back, or a nondescript human. Originally, it made stubborn demands for food and large sums of U.S. currency, but Researcher Talaron has devised several containment strategies to keep its effects at bay. SCP 3999-J's secondary effect is an anti-mimetic field that erases all memories of itself from anyone who views it. This effect occurs in real time, so the entity appears invisible. However, Researcher Talaron is immune to the anti-mimetic effect. Studies are underway to determine Researcher Talaron's unique immunity to SCP 3999-J. Update, January 5th, 2015. Drapped. Fifth, uh... Actually, that's not a bad way to do it, but I'm gonna make it consistent with that other date that I did. Consistency is key, everybody. Description. SCP 3999-J. Alright. Formatting. Here we go. Actually, these should be different, because the first one was on the 5th of blah on the 25th of June, but these are files, so they should be written differently. Update, 5th of January, 2015. Guest researchers Candy Madison, Jackie Love, and Emma Angel have agreed to indefinitely assist Researcher Talaron in containment efforts. Update, 5th of March, 2015. Guest researchers Mitch Talaron and Trevor Mason were both confirmed to be immune to SCP 3999-J and have agreed to indefinitely assist Researcher James Talaron in containment efforts. Update, 19th of April, 2015. Guest researchers Alexa Cuddy and Ivy Hart have agreed to indefinitely assist Researcher Talaron in containment efforts. Document 3999-J-1-3. These transcripts document the first known encounter with SCP 3999-J. Alright, I'm gonna have to say something like, staff and Researcher Talaron voices identified. That's what it is. So voices identified. Staff. Who are staff? Because it just says staff, it says containment and staff, so I don't know who that is. But, ah, front desk staff and containment staff and Mobile Task Force Delta-1. Got it. Okay. Voices identified. Front desk staff Researcher Talaron. Hello, front desk? Yeah, this is, not yet, it's yes. Voices identified. Hello, front desk? Hello, front desk? Yes, this is James Talaron. Can you ask the cafeteria to send up a cheeseburger and fries to my desk? I'm working late tonight. Ah, let me check. No, sorry, you're not on the list. Only essential containment personnel can request meal delivery. Oh, I see. Well, I've got a Keter entity here and I need a cheeseburger and fries to contain it. Whatever, take it up with containment, extension 3333. Voices identified. Containment staff Researcher Talaron. Hello, containment, what's your emergency? Yes, this is Researcher Talaron. I'm in room 402B and I've got a Keter entity here and I need a cheeseburger and fries to contain it. By the way, sir, cheeseburger and fries, staff, what is the designation of the Keter entity? It's new and it wants a Coke also. Yes, sir. Stay where you are, sir. Do not move. Do not engage the Keter entity. Wait for containment forces to arrive. Voices identified. Mobile Task Force Delta 1. Researcher Talaron. Sir, do not move. Where is the Keter entity? It's right there in the corner. What? Can't you see it? Keter entity, stand down. It says to put the food on my desk. 626, present the package. Sir, yes, sir. Oh, it disappeared. Great job, Mobile Task Force. Alright, that's all super silly. Hey, Blade, we're doing, you missed the SCP tale New Job, which our new patron on Patreon requested, Huzzah. And now we're doing 399-J. But I've really got to listen to those voices and see how they came out. Terry, to send up a cheeseburger and fries to my desk, I'm working late tonight. You're not on the list. Only essential containment personnel can request meal delivery. Oh, I see. Well, I've got a Keter entity here and I need a cheeseburger and fries to contain it. Whatever, take it up with containment, extension 3333. Voices identified. Containment staff, Researcher Talaron. Hello, containment. What's your emergency? Yes, this is Researcher Talaron. I'm in room 402B and I've got a Keter entity here and I need a cheeseburger and fries to contain it. By the way, sir, cheeseburger and fries stat, what is the designation of the Keter entity? It's new and it wants a Coke also. Yes, sir. Stay where you are, sir. Do not move. Do not engage the Keter entity. Wait for containment forces to arrive. Voices identified. Mobile Task Force dealt to one. Researcher Talaron. Sir, do not move. Where is the Keter entity? It's right there in the corner. What? Can't you see it? Keter entity, stand down. It says to put the food on my desk. 626, present the package. Sir, yes, sir. Oh, it disappeared. Great job, Mobile Task Force. Okay, that'll do it. This is ridiculous. This is ridiculous. I love it because it's ridiculous. I'll edit that in. I'll put in some equalization so it sounds like it's coming over the phone rather than straight microphones so that'll sound good. And then document 3999-J-2713. This transcript documents the latest information on SCP-3999-J's containment. Voices identified. Director Lycus, Researcher Talaron. James, it's a great thing you do. I don't know how you can handle it keeping that thing at bay all these years. It's no trouble, Director, really. How are the latest containment procedures working? Oh, they're great. The containment course was really a great idea. By driving it around at high speeds in those supercars, we're able to really just contain the hell out of 3999. Does this mean the old containment procedures are no longer necessary? You don't need the pool or the containment buffet anymore? No, sir. Not at all, sir. Those are still absolutely, absolutely necessary. I mean, the cars only work on it for so long, sir. It adapts to them quickly, you know? And only by wrestling with it into that pool with my fellow researchers can we really, you know, keep it contained. And the buffet, I mean, 3999 wants, like, five or six times a day, so that's no. We need to keep that. Roger, that. So all of your pres- Dread, I was doing so good. Man. So all of your pres- All of your- Almost there. We're almost to the end. So close. So close. Let's finish it. Finish it. So all of your previous containment procedures are still effective? Yeah, yeah. But listen, you know, the bar by the pool, 3999, well, uh, too fast. That was not what I wanted to do. Let's, uh, do better than that. You are not cool yet. Make better art. What is it? What is it? Where is it on the screen? It's gone. Uh, there it is. Yeah, yeah. Nope, that's not how you say it. Yeah, yeah. But listen, you know, the bar by the pool, 3999, well, I think he's adapting the selection there. I was hoping to restock with some different varieties. Absolutely. I'll approve it. Anything else? Yeah, I'll be putting in another order for Xbox games. 3999 has adapted all of those as well. 3999 has adapted all of those also. Proper wording, even when you're being ridiculous. Proper wording. And continuing on. Of course. Hey, can we get this short? I got a run. I need to go, uh, oversee Candy and Alexa. Godspeed to you. Don't laugh. That's the, that's the kicker there. Put it up. Say it really inspirational, like Telleran's an inspiration to him. Godspeed to you. That's inspiration. He's so inspirational, taking care of that Ketter entity all by himself. And finally, update, fifth of August, 2017. SCP 3999 dash J has demonstrated the ability to momentarily affect remote individuals, causing them to hallucinate. This typically manifests as illusions of Researcher Telleran entering and leaving the containment facility. It also manifested remotely when one off-duty scientist hallucinated Researcher Telleran entering the casino. And later that day, when another staff member hallucinated seeing Researcher Telleran purchasing an automobile. Dret, can do better than that. Can do better than that. All on that same occasion, an entire team of containment personnel hallucinated, picking up Researcher Telleran at a hospital after they hallucinated him, drunkenly text them. I don't think that sentence was right, on that same occasion. On that same occasion, an entire team of containment personnel hallucinated picking up Researcher Taloran at a hospital after they hallucinated him, drunkenly texting them that he had crashed into a parked car. Researcher Taloran's investigation into this new ability is ongoing. Let's just delete that one I failed. Perfect. All right, silly voices, joke SCP complete. And that is, so new job is going to be about 10 minutes and 3999-J is about 7 minutes. So ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, we just recorded two SCPs today. I'm going to put those in the editing bay and we're going to make them up and they're going to be good. So that brings us to the end of today's live stream. So remember to check out all of the links below for site 42 merch and patreons and discords and all that good YouTuber stuff. Like, share, and subscribe so we can keep growing the channel. And yeah, thanks for tuning in. See you next time, Foundation staff. Camera goes off right in your face, fist bump.