 Hello everyone, welcome again to another Knox Vivalife video. I'm out here at the park today. Got a nice view of the city and the background. I came out here for a walk but as you can see it is quite hot and sunny so I'm going to head to the shade over here but yes in this video I am going to be about how there is this one thing that the narcissist does not want you to know. Of course there may be more than one thing but this is the main thing and it's a very important thing that I would like to discuss in this one. Of course this is something that they don't want you to know because of course yes that will trigger that and they may even lash at you very careful when you are watching this but yes the reality is that this narcissist this person that you are dealing with they're actually not even real they don't even exist it is an automation a simulation it's artificial intelligence but of course it can seem real especially in the beginning got a lot of flies on me and just gonna walk over here yes it can seem very real in the beginning when they love bomb you they manipulate you as you're looking at it like I've met the one I've met my soulmate this person who knows me they understand me they see me when in actuality no they are nothing more than just a reflection of your own values and virtues of your own ideas and ideals because this is how they survive emotionally it's by studying their targets and being whatever they think they want to see it has nothing to do with them at all and it will seem very suspicious when you are dealing with them because in the beginning it's like it's almost to be true it's like you get on so well the very agreeable and it just seems like this perfect situation and you're just thinking where is this person being all my life to where I mean many people in the world we do feel like a lot of people don't understand us or they're not the same page they don't really see us and then this person comes along it makes you feel like you are the world to them they make you feel like like there's a reason why it never worked out with anyone else but everything you see is in fact an illusion it's a misinterpreted perception because yes we also have to play a part in it as well we do have our own fantasies and dreams and we want to believe that it's real which makes it very easy for these predators to get in because they study you they know what you want to see and then they just go ahead and play their role and they do it very well in the beginning in the love bomb phase and then also even when you see underneath the mask they become very aggressive and intimidating they coerce you they devalue you even that side of them is not real as well even that side of them is not real that's just because by that point now you are threatening the illusion you're threatening this false character this bought this artificial intelligence and all it really cares about is its own survival that's what is deeply embedded in its programming so if it feels threatened it is going to further manipulate and confuse you it's going to gas like you and make you think that you're losing your mind and it's going to try to keep you down and even try to just wipe you out to erase you because by that point you become this reflection back to them of everything that they were portraying themselves to be in the beginning a steep down they knew they were not they knew that's not who they are and of course they know that because they present different characters to whoever they are around which is why you may see sometimes whether they have other supplies or they're spending time with their friends it may seem like they're a completely different person especially by the devaluation phase it seems like they get in well with them but not you but in fact all you're seeing is just another character that they have tailor-made for someone else that's all that is and I know it may look like sometimes as though maybe this happens with you as though they were fighting before and then they suddenly got mad and began to take it out on you and guess that's exactly what they would love for you to think because they don't want to take accountability and it's really the same thing with any artificial intelligence these chatbots if there's one thing they don't like its accountability they want to blame you instead because otherwise if the artificial intelligence is wrong or incorrect then what is the point in having it in the first place and that's exactly how narcissists think and their entire disorder the whole point of the narcissistic personality disorder it's for their survival this these false characters because they abandoned who they really are a long time ago they didn't just change over night with you although it may have looked like that the reality is that whoever you thought they were in the beginning this character that they presented to you that wasn't even real that was just to lure you in and you can see that because as soon as the the right opportunity or situation is presented to them they will take advantage of it they will exploit it even if it goes against everything that they were meant to stand for this identity this belief system everything that they portrayed themselves to be the reality is that they were like that all along and being around someone like yourself someone who may have been innocent and naive someone who is very trusting compassionate and forgiving an empath being around someone like you just brought out the animal inside of them that was already there it just amplified the traits that they already possessed so they were already like that to begin with they were never with you they were never on your side and once you start to catch on and figure them out they just want to destroy you they want to take you out because by that point you are threatening their reputation you're threatening to expose them just by you being yourself which is why we do find that in a lot of these narcissistic relationships by the end of it people don't even know who they are and yet the narcissist leaves arrogantly as though they know exactly what they think about themselves and about you and they've created this narrative they may have even enforced their fly monkeys and started the smear campaign as well but all of this is fake even when they discard you that is fake too when they ghost you these are all just characters for them to gain power and control and when you're constantly trying to gain power and control you're kind of abandoning yourself in a way as I said with the narcissist they were already like this before the reason why they targeted you in the beginning was for power and control that's all that they were looking for and that is why by the end of it they just begin to despise you they can't stand you they can't even be around you because everything you are your identity your values and beliefs these are all a serious threat to them and of course the reason why it's such a threat is because they never had an identity to begin with they never had anything that they really valued or believed in so that's why it's such a threat to them and to their reputation because of course they don't want people to know but the reality is a long time ago they chose power and control rather than just wanting to be accepted for who they are and that is why they also cannot accept you they would rather you were anyone else than yourself which is why after they target you they see you as an extension of themselves and they try to trap you they try to make you dependent on them even if it's just for some form of invalidation then first they invalidate you and then they validate you try and move you in the direction of where they want you to go because as I said yes this person that you are it's a real threat to the illusion when you have discipline and self-control when you're able to manage yourself and your own perceptions remember narcissists can't do that if the right opportunity or situation is presented to them they will exploit it and I know many of you know exactly what I'm talking about they may have cheated on you lying to you on many occasions maybe stolen from you as well they abused you they manipulated you they gaslighted you they future faked and of course someone who has a strong core and they have empathy someone like that it's very difficult for them to do that I'm not saying that it's impossible but even if they did do it they would feel guilty immediately afterwards and then they would try to rekindle things with you of course as we know narcissists do not do that everything they do is manipulation everything is an illusion which is why if you look back you will see that all they ever did was reflect things back to you you reflect in things that you believed in you were about they never had their own separate identity it was just whatever they thought you wanted to see or whatever they thought would get them what they want from you by tricking you because in fact this illusion it is powered by you this is not something that they've generated from within it's not something where they're just influenced by you this is really all of your power and energy is validating it to produce the effect that they want which means that yes they don't actually have anything of their own you will never hear anything new or different from them and you could tell them something and they will go and repeat it back to you with such confidence and conviction as though they really truly believe in it but if you ask them questions if you ask them to expand they can't do it they can't give a deeper explanation for it and of course the reason why is because it isn't real everything they portray to you from the love bombing to the devaluation to the discards it is all fake and this is the one thing that they do not want you to know so yes they have no identity of their own no innocence of value all they have is just this void which isn't really anything at all and because of that all they can do is take from you and that's how you know exactly what you are dealing with because all they're doing is taking to fill this void inside of them and that's where the revelation comes in these characters this artificial intelligence it's not so that they can help you it's just so that they can feed themselves and the crazy thing is that you may think you know this person you may think that you know who they are but as I said if the right opportunity or situation is presented to them they will revert back to their old ways they do not change or grow they remain exactly the same and there are a number of reasons for this it's um it is of course their disorder they abandon their true identity so now they're just whatever they think people want them to be especially those of the opposite sex they just mold themselves into whatever they think you want them to be and then they present that to you so that they can get what they want but it's nothing new or original it's always just a reflection of your desires or needs but also it can be coincidental as well on some occasions about maybe because of social conditioning and peer pressure or media influences because yes as babu says in the live chat there are most people becoming narcissistic now yes I would say we do live in a narcissistic world I mean we've only got to look around especially those of you if you've been on holiday recently it's like whatever country you go to in the world everyone has a similar style they all dress the same they all have the same interests they all like the same music and a lot of people they all eat American food now everywhere in the world so yes it's definitely having an influence and an impact on the world all of these things and yeah I would say people are being brainwashed by all of these things by television by music and movies they're made to feel insecure as though who they actually are isn't good enough and now sadly especially with the new generations people who who from a young age they have been indoctrinated by the internet by television and movies so they really have no identity of their own at all they are just whoever they think people want them to be they don't spend any time alone you know narcissists they can never be alone they always have to have their sources of supply so they're always being influenced by other people it's peer pressure and social conditioning as well but for myself I was very fortunate I was born in 1989 so the internet didn't come in until later we had television and video games but I was actually the type of person who I spent a lot of time on my own I just enjoyed going to the beach playing with my dog walking in forests riding on my bike so that was typically what I used to do in my childhood and because of that I do believe that I developed quite a unique identity one that is very different to most people in society and of course yes that is what has made me a target for many narcissists that's what made me stand out in the first place but myself I mean of course I have had many opportunities and situations in my life and yes when these opportunities have been presented to me I have maintained my discipline and self-control back in 2017 I gave up playing video games and I stopped drinking alcohol I also gave up coffee and energy drinks so I lowered my intake of caffeine and as well as that I also had a spiritual awakening I became more aware of certain things happening around me and I also became a vegan this was in 2019 so for four years I have avoided eating meat and dairy products and also of course there's my youtube channel I've been making videos every day almost every day for over five years putting out this content so yes sadly unlike a lot of people in this world today I have managed to maintain my identity and that doesn't mean that I'm completely perfect of course not I mean there may be times where I want to enjoy some chocolate or if you've seen me on instagram I like the shisha as well but these are things that I don't do all the time and also it's very different with narcissists because when I'm talking about how they lack discipline and self-control and how they abandon their identities they do this with the intent of going off and harming other people that is the crazy thing about it it's like they look at themselves and they feel like they're not good enough as they are to harm you and also to trick you as well in the beginning so they create this character who is all powerful like the puppet master this evil villain and then that is who they become they take on that role and it's kind of like two different roles that they have there's one where they're trying to lure you in and entice and seduce you and then the other one is when they're like the judge the jury the executioner the punisher when you look at it they really just want to punish people for the very thing that they did to themselves for the fact that they lack discipline and self-control the fact that they chose to abandon their identity when you look at it that's really what they're punishing you for because they take no accountability they don't want to look at themselves and accept that they are weak instead they want to take it out on the people around them and abuse and punish you because they never take accountability they never accept their faults or wrongdoings and of course the reason why is because there's really no one even in there it's like the lights are on but no one is home no one is actually there they're just whatever people want them to be and when they start to lose control and you start to catch on that is when they want to keep you down because at that point you're like this light you're constantly reflecting back to them that they are not real so they just want to stamp that light out so that they can remain in darkness with this world that they've pulled over their own eyes and a lot of times yes they will still steal bits and pieces of your character and identity as well and they will use it to attract their next source of supply or even just to keep you around to make you feel like you're on the same page and they will really want to destroy your identity too everything that is good and unique about you they will start comparing you to other people whether it's in a positive or negative way and then they will try to get you to make adjustments they will try to get you to change because they already know that they're all messed up they know that they gave up on themselves a long time ago and when they see someone with emotional stability you have discipline and self-control you have a plan for your life you have all these things that you've been doing for a very long time when they see all of that it really triggers them because they know that their life is not like that so they just want to take you off course off your path they want to control you because anything that reminds them of who you actually are it really hurts them they become very afraid they feel intimidated because they haven't got anything and you will notice that because they never have anything to give to you they're always negative everything they do is intended to take away from you but they don't want you to know this they don't want you to know that yes in fact they are an automation they have no identity of their own it's just an artificial intelligence there is nothing being generated from within this is just the reality of narcissists and even just narcissism in general and sadly yes as I mentioned we are living in a narcissistic world that is just what the world has become so a lot of people in this world now they don't even have an identity of their own it's all just groupthink a hive mind the effects of media influence and social conditioning so now it's like no matter where you go in the world everyone is the same there's nothing that really separates them anymore and it is sad I don't know if this is a situation that can be reversed because it does seem as though people just don't want to accept themselves as they are and some just won't accept other people as they are as well especially when that's a threat to their false identity so where is the desire or incentive for people to make the necessary changes and that is why I think this is going to continue and I'm sure many of you you may have experienced the effects of being around these types of people and what I would advise for you is to just spend some time alone or at least around people who encourage your own individuality people who you feel safe with people who you can trust because being around narcissists remember they have no identity of their own they have no innocence of value which is why they're so negative all they do is take to fill this void inside of them so all of these great things about you just get lost in this black hole and it just sucks it out of you which is why at some point you do need to take some time to rebuild Priscilla's life page says I felt alone even when he was here he didn't communicate at all he was always quiet yes I have experienced that myself it's like even when they're there it's more lonely than being alone because you're just with this void it's just sucking all of the energy out of you you end up wanting and desiring something and they're portraying something to you but then at the same time you can't get it from them because they don't even have it to give so then you just feel completely stuck but yes this is just how it goes and they don't want you to know about this because it is a threat to their fear of rejection and abandonment their fear of exposure and the longer you're around them you will feel like you're just becoming just like them you will feel drained you will feel lifeless you will have your eyes wide open looking for something to replenish you and then of course that's when they're gonna come around and shame you or act like they're this hero this savior this person who's going to rescue you but even when they do that it's just so they can build you up and break you back down again but yes I will be diving deeper into this topic in the future I have plans to go a bit deeper into it about how narcissists are an automation they are just artificial intelligence and yeah it may seem real on the outside it can seem very convincing but in fact it isn't real at all it is a simulation and the best that you can do if you can't get away from it of course you must limit your contact as much as possible because it will have an effect on you but not only that but you need to kind of release your resistance around it as well because that seems to cause harm too when you're trying to fight it or push it away that's when they gain power over you because remember they want to be in control so that they can feel safe and secure around you so yes when you're around narcissists you must give them something even if it's just a little bit of your time or energy just something to keep them at bay because if you just cut it off completely they will become very hungry and needy they will be all over you like a rash and you just won't be able to get them away they can become very domineering and that energy is suffocating it will pull you in and destroy you unless you at least just give them a little bit and I know it might sound strange it might sound counter-intuitive but just try it practice it let go of that resistance even for a short period of time and then watch how it makes you feel it makes you feel more comfortable because that's why they commit these behaviors in the first place it is of course to take from you so instead of them taking all of the time if you just give then they don't need to come after you so that's my mindset around that because they are going to want something yes they see that you are different you haven't walked the beaten path like everyone else you may prefer to isolate sometimes you spend a lot of time by yourself so they already know that you've got that they know that you generate this energy from within to replenish yourself and they know that that is very rare in today's world it's very difficult for them to get that from anyone else so that's why they come around you and this is why you should recognize that the triangulation after they discard you the new source all of these things are just a fabrication because despite all of that they will still try to come back to you or even just use it to hurt you because they know that yes you are the one who has that energy and anyone else power sources of supply they may have treated them very very differently and of course the reason why is because by hurting them they already know they're not going to get that energy out of them but they know that they can get back from you and yet we look at ourselves and we wonder what makes us so different are we just contemptible when the reality is that yes we are different but it's in a good way we enjoy solitude we enjoy time alone because we do have this value on the inside which is why a lot of us self-love we overthink we overanalyze we're just deep people a narcissist love that they really want to be around people like that even if it's just for a short period of time to get you to to attach and to think about them because that's all energy to them but remember narcissists are superficial they don't self-love they project everything outwards because there is no innocence of value there is nothing coming from within which is why whenever you're around them you always feel drained and that's really the clear difference there and it's how you know exactly what you're dealing with the victim the empath we self-love we feel bad about ourselves we try to be better but narcissists they project everything outwards onto you so that they can take from you because there's nothing that they can generate from within so yes that's really it the one thing they don't want you to know they don't want you to know this about them they don't want you to know that yes they are fake they're just superficial it's just this image you see on the outside but beneath that there is nothing there and that is why you couldn't even have a conversation with them a lot of times instead they just wanted to argue with you and point out all of these things wrong with you because if there is anything new or original that they can bring to the table it's always going to be something that undermines you because they are predators they are manipulators but actually even that as well it's typically likely to be something that they've seen someone else do before it may be something that someone did to them when they were younger or they saw someone do it to someone else and they saw that it was effective so now they just use it on you so yes as pathetic as it sounds this is the reality even the abusive side of them when they're angry when they're fighting you when they're calling names when they're ghosting and discarding you even that isn't them even that is a false character and when you realize that the entire thing just falls apart which is why of course they will often come back to further indoctrinate you to keep you under their spell because as I said this is the one thing they don't want you to know they don't want you to be constantly on them or even just by you being yourself you're reflecting this back to them and you're making them look at themselves and of course when they do that it's just going to come back on you they're going to try to control you they're going to start a smear campaign because the one thing they don't want to do is to look at themselves they just want to look at you and see all of these things wrong with you but they don't ever want to see it in themselves when the reality is that if they would just do that if they would do as we do if they would let go of that resistance and stop fighting it and just accept it and self-love process these emotions and accept that maybe they were taught the wrong things in life maybe they were socially conditioned maybe they were all of these things but now they want to start again spend some time alone and learn to generate it from within then maybe there is a chance that they would not be narcissists anymore but the problem is that for a lot of them it is working for them they're getting the results or the effects that they want so why would they stop there's no incentive for them to do that and of course a lot of them they enjoy it and they're addicted to it so there's just no reason for them to do that they also enjoy turning you inside out as well just the power that it gives them when they come across you in the beginning you're this hard-working motivated person you've got so much discipline you've got your life in order while their life is in shambles it makes them feel better it medicates them when they can tear a person like that that type of person's life apart to just tear it to rubble they love when they can do that so for these reasons there's not really any reason for them to stop unless somehow the world returns back to culture and tradition then these types of people would have a problem if everything was in order again because yes they do thrive in dysfunction that's how they survive if everything was functional and normal they wouldn't know what to do they wouldn't know how to survive because yes they've been doing this a long time they've been surviving by taking from other people draining them stealing so it would be very difficult for them to start again and to learn just how to do things right so in most situations it is highly unlikely that they are ever going to do that but if you feel like you have lost yourself in this relationship with the narcissist it's not too late for you to do that because narcissists it's a shell of a person but with us the victims we are we become almost like a shell of a person ourselves by the end of it but something we don't often realize is that there is something beneath the shell and that is where our true identity lies because they have built up this wall the shield they have contained us in this outer shell and it's like once you break through that that is when you will find yourself and this shell is a fabricated identity it's projective identification that they have used to contain and control you and it's like all you really need sometimes is for someone to come along and to break you out of that shell the problem is if the narcissist sees that they're going to say that the person you're around they're a bad influence they're no good for you when in actuality that was likely what you valued all along that was already the direction that you were going in to break out of this shell and to find yourself so yes that is a very interesting concept that I thought it would share with you a different way of looking at things with the narcissist their outer shell is the false characters and beneath that is just a void but for the victims the game paths I believe that yes this outer shell is the the projected identity that they have given to us and then beneath that is who we actually are and we will find that by and learning everything that we have been taught that is how we will find ourselves but yes that's really it that's really the message for today the one thing the narcissist doesn't want you to know I hope this video was helpful for you if it was you can give it a thumbs up down below and let me know your thoughts in the comment section as well as you may know I do read your comments every morning share the video subscribe one-on-one coaching sessions you can book on my website it's narksurvivor.co.uk and you can check out my Instagram as well I've got new pictures and videos of my travels every day on there and I will be flying out to another country next week so there will be new stuff on there very soon anyway that's it for this one I hope you found it helpful and I hope you enjoy your day