 Let's see, this battle rap shit is something you bleed through, you camel-toe See the V through is jeans too, like a V-suit That, it's a Gameboy, made it pass through the lead few Now you beat blue for that money, I read black for the green too, like a heel bruise It's so funny too, that's equal to Lee Koop and the PC he used to make beats through I'll stay presenting them the depths of my work until I'm getting the respect I deserve Wear your heart against the feather of truth on some Egyptian shit And even then you'll never get through If that's all you've got to offer, then I guess it'll do And when I say I've got the skunk, it ain't no pep of the pew Don't flop, it's your boy Don't Flop, all fucking day, you know the score We are back here in Liverpool, please make some noise one time, let's go! Shouts to Lunar April 25th, it's six weeks exactly today Going down Ministry of Sound London, you can buy your tickets from Don't Flop dot com slash tickets It's going to be absolutely fucking classic Here's a return, Osh is killing it, make sure Osh advice Lunar, Ministry of Sound, 25th of April Anyway, we are back here for one of the main events of the day Shouts to all the fans in Liverpool, we're coming out man We're here 2015, back at the Casimir man I'm going to say on my right hand side, he smashed his bottle with cracker last time we're here Make sure you go on iTunes, cop the album, Sad Clown, it's my dude Innuendo, make some noise! Left hand side came back for Somburn last year, had a fucking classy with Ogmyos Now he's back up north, but Innuendo, please make some noise for Lego, let's go! This is a non-judge promo, but as you know, it's at the end of the video Please, please click on the link and vote on the forum and the poll for who you think won And as I said, one more time, Don't Flop dot com slash tickets if you want to come to future events, UK or USA Alright, Lego won the flip because Innuendo go first, round number one, Innuendo, let's go! Good idea, let's go! Yo, now while I admit, I struggle quite a bit to write for this Because this is Batarap Sean and you're far too fucking nice for it Every time I try to sit and scribe a script, all I could think was how nice he is He's literally one of the nicest kids I ever have met Everyone else in my life are pricks So what angles could I possibly use to try to diss a guy like this? I mean, his favourite phrase is I don't worry, I've got this and no honestly, I insist Always so polite and shit Lasting the cypher to grab the mic and spit On Facebook sharing people's statuses and liking pics can pay to you, I am shit His pen is the mightiest, I could never contend in a plight of wits Everything you say, true days, true say, never try to fib or light ears Can't stop staring at his eyes and lips Can't stop staring at his eyes and lips Look at that t-shirt and how nice it fits You might look tight but they're just right I love the way his jeans complement his thighs and hips I love the way his jeans complement his thighs and hips And that nice and big, wide and thick 9-inch dick, my guy's a pimp Charming and clever, he's calmer, the pressure whenever the crisis hits Surrounded by crowds of fans being loud, the hands pulling out, the cameras like sightseers He supplies his misses with all the desires and wishes Smiles and kisses, but still fans' time to fit A room full of groupies backstage just to sign the tits By the way, he said you've got some nice ones, bitch I just wish I could describe why you're such a nice guy He's the type of person to give you a cheeky little hinge during the game of vice-bike He's gonna be on the fucking joke You couldn't hope to meet a more lovely bloke He just offered me a ciggy outside and he doesn't smoke See, we agree to 92nd rounds, but it's gonna be at least 9 minutes before I finish Because you're the only MC in the league who still sticks to these imaginary time limits That's nice, innit? I wouldn't go down that well, would I? Imaginary time limits, that's nice, innit? Always weird, I'm sick of him and that chiseled chimp Stick figure thin, always weird and the biggest grin Fucking little gimp He's travelled the world and taken pictures with a chimp Where the fuck have I been? My life's fucking shit The only monkey I've seen is 500 quid I spent that on Lemo for a slag who likes sucking dick Now I know this isn't supposed to be a compliment, battlemate But I just wanted to tell you that you're great I offer you an after-eight I know it's not exactly late or after-eight But you're so sound, you can still have one, mate You're such a safe dude that if I raped you, you'd be like, okay dude You'd be like, okay dude, I'll take some of the blame too What they say is true, it takes two, so I just raped you If you were a bouncy, you'd let everybody in the same queue go straight through And when he asks for the money on the door, he'll pay you They say, wear the smile and the wear the smile back But for a sad clown that doesn't help So I'll happily just tell this happy-go-lucky man to go fuck himself And he probably would as well and it'd feel good as hell Let's go, let's go, let's go, let's go, let's go, let's go, let's go, let's go Before this battle, I never really wanted to hassle After round one, I guess it is a compliments battle You thought that I should slash your face with a jagged blade Thanks for the after-8s, but you're still a fucking wanker, mate I never happy-flaped like I haven't back Obviously, thanks for the after-8s They'd have never given me them if they were fucking Jaffa cakes I'm rugged and gritty, come to my city Now Michael loves them cripples, that's just some of that I've noticed So I hope you listen because I've come here to expose this He once shagged a woman that had multiple cirrhosis And after he fucked her, she had to double up her dosage See, they say he's sick in the head He only has promiscuous sex with women if they're missing their legs So does he love to shag women with disabilities? Yes You probably spent most of your evenings on mobility beds He doesn't care who it is as long as his dick's getting wet And that's the reason all of these women won't give him respect What did you expect? You even fought a stripper that's deaf You probably tried to pick up blind women in Vision Express Seeing your window isn't afraid, it's simple at best Plus you look a little like Shrek, we say look and breast You really are into some horrible stuff I mean, you fuck with more vegetables than Ognios does So you fought a lap dancer that was actually deaf But when you asked her for sex, how did you know that the answer was yes? The sign language is somewhere you don't know What she really said is, oh that's wonderful but no And the fact that she's a deaf dancer is kind of unique How the fuck did she keep in time with the beat? I bet you all may have thought so because she's deaf Yeah, well I'm not disgusted, I'm impressed Believe me, prick, in your battles you just repeat your shit Same stuff, different daily, you need some flick So leave it kid, because my collab I'll eat a bit So even if you think you've won, you'll get stung by the reaper's grip It's leaf or shit, catch a bleeding lip from the D-Ball hits Or we'll take your pizza, shit and moses when the sea was split And you need to quit always looking for them illegal hits Because I'm surprised you can feel your penis tip from the beak, you snitch If our mother is a townhooker, then she'll never sound gutter When you look just like a Scouse Buddha Feeling you mate, you look like Carl Pilkinson If you hear Ricky Gervais Brenda, let's go man, come on Say and I fuck disabled bids, that's not on I accidentally signed up to disabilitymatch.com Alright, now this round no messing about Let's get everything out in the open I struggle to give this thing devotion And the fact I'm still battling the 27 brings mixed emotions See recently me and Don Flop have been through some seriously cringy moments I'm sorry Abe, but that's what happens when you keep giving me shit opponents But now I find that hunger again when I pull out a pen it'll get made to this I don't give a fuck who's stood in front of me and finally taking me self serious So I keep spitting even if they tell me to stop I didn't enter for guap, I'm trying to get to the top Any rapper in the league can get left dead on the spot And fuck patching her body cos I'll be letting it drop She over the past few years I've done a lot of shit battles I was after the bread and needed some books So if you go and make pounds I used to throw away rounds Like I was feeding the ducks You're all about to witness this old dog's final breath Before he dies of death You feel the side effects of a line of kettles He lies in bed to prove I'm a vet so wind your neck in I catch him slipping if it's dry or wet And this performance will be flawless So I suggest you mind your step That was fucking sick Perfect structure like a spider's web Applying pressure till he's showing signs of stress He can try his best but this fire I'm breathing I'll leave him with that Simon Westin kind of flesh Not no Simon Westin, it's not like I've been I've got face like Like I've paid you get 20 bag of the finest I can shed to rob your nan's wine collection And wank on a favourite of China's So you travelled the world and came back for your girl Now I'm impressed but I'm interested more In why he left, I mean the guy just fled Every night in bed you had to Skype the sketch Imagine six months or not and put cyber sex You were on that viral flex coming all over the internet Like my name's Jeff You fully rep the sticks I swear this fella lives like 20 minutes From Jefferson's residence But I'm an inner city child so I always kept me wits Surrounded by fiends who used the benefits To get a fix from an early age I was selling bits, I know eds who shift So me breaking down Lego Well I guess it fits ever since I've had to connect with bricks He asked around people to tell you that I'm sound Like oh, in Uengo he's funny when he spits bars But a punny can get killed lah Cos I roll with shooters who pull out the john To get that money for them six bar air six halfs Fuck me favourite bar up Fuck that fuck you say How did it start? Nah fuck it To get that money for them six halfs Yeah bars bro and a hard flow The way I piece things together you can't cope Cos my basic structure's better than Lego's Mechano Fuck it asshole You're about to be outlined I'm choking flesh See these days I'm writing more than talking less So wake up yawn and stretch Cos sleep on me and he will be And for a rude awakening like morning sex I'm so sick when I try you know See for me this matchups For me this matchups like Will Smith and Seven Pants Cos it's really tragic but I gave it me heart If you were small like dead and brown Cos you had to wake your magic to get your name on the cart Looking at ya kinda look like a flabby drag queen But with this next bar I'll make you laugh like Jack D I've got a few battle raps G I know I threw them over there but you haven't backed me Now fuck a key to the city kidder I picked the lock And now I'm kicking off like Mickey Knox With the collision of cough But fuck the shit you dropped it's all big Yes it isn't hot and so I let him swim with the Cinder blocks at the Prince's dock Now I know you like to sniff mate But you cokeheads spend more time in the box And shit break So in this battle I let it worth it pal You've been a coke sniffing faggot Since you scrambled out the birth canal Somebody tells Sprungy's missus to scrub their dishes Chubby bitches walking round like Everything just looks delicious Oh oh Everything just looks delicious Oh shit you've grown a bit of hair Trying to hide the facts that most of it is there Most of it is there So you're on a mission for Earth This battle wasn't cost efficient Cos you're either gonna choke or spit a bunch of slop You've written stop and listen You're feeling like you just swapped prescriptions With Dr Shipman God has risen Nah it's the devil's advocate Cos you could never match my wit So you've got them clever patterns You could never fathom kid I'll be swinging round your spine with just your head attached to it Then his mum will do anything for a 20 pack of sticks She walks around with a cane and rocks a Lenny Kravitz wig She walks around with a cane and rocks a Lenny Kravitz wig And I know you love the coke But fella dead that have it quick Cos there's a potential heart attack in every bag you sniff I will get on some bleak shit once the petrol can is lit Dash it hard as I can and blow in your window Slap to bits then I'll spring into action On some inspector gadget shit And ruin this pussy on cam like a terra Patrick vid Fuck you in your belly fat You pathetic sack of shit All you have is racist jokes So check the swagger kiddo Because when this rapper spits You will need protected goggles just like Edgar Davids did So you thought that you were winning But you're losing it now Cos you're about as fucking gangster as a beautiful south And your originality is pretty stupid no doubt Cos someone told me that your rap name used to be Scouse Now that name's pretty fitting for in your window I guess Cos you are a scouse Which is relevant, yes The more I think about it It's on the fresher it gets Cos it was spelled with a pound sign instead of an M Right around I can eat like I go with open arms Can you have them back? No you can't You will win him but you're losing it now Cos you're about as fucking gangster as a beautiful south And your originality is pretty stupid no doubt No you can't And he was calling me border And I blatantly take the piss This is not a ball patch it's a crop circle I'm living proof that aliens exist It's been a steady influx against the rappers Coming in to don't flop And the fans get gas because the rhymes are cold But I've lost count of the amount of lies they've told Over the amount of times they've rolled And over the amount of lines they've sold Cos if these MCs were really getting bite from coke It'd be like that picture dress on the internet Cos I just phoned some of the guys I know And we'd leave them black and blue for that white and gold See usually I can't decide to go for bars or jokes So in the end I end up coming half ass with both I don't put enough effort in and I start to choke But when you peel the layers back there's something good in there somewhere I had to choke And when this battle got confirmed I thought fuck me the 14th the march is close So I made the start So I made the start and wrote a few bars and notes Took the calm approach to keep me dedicated I even meditated and read a few Deli Lama quotes I apologised to willsy and soldier too for the racism And what I said about the banana boat Sorry I even envisioned myself winning and bought a celebratory cigar to smoke I thought of a few ways that I could pie this bloke Come with a couple of armist jokes Just have an armless poker that we harvest oats And lives when the farm would go to his hood full of fear Round here like a park of coats See I led you to believe I've been outcast As far as I ever could get Left with no hope I had to take a rest from the net and stop holding a rolled note While I blow coke and watch hoes go round polls bro But wait if this maggot catches a hook Then I'm a showboat Cos I'm real and those bait lines won't float Well wait oh mate Red ledger cast rest net Paul waits maggot catch hook Real line float bait That's so great mate I swear there's some weird association there And by now Hey, hey, hey And by now I think you should onto it But don't mind me everyone I'm just fishing for condom All he does that is shit See if you think Lego's better than me Okay fine But either way I was blessed with a great mind Lego's so fucking stupid He tried to do a plank phone call on FaceTime Listen You haven't got the look of a battle rapper fan You should play guitar and write hooks Afro man And if I see Lego's fat old man I swear she's a gunner Cos I throw that out bitch down the stairs like Madonna Remember when Oshay said you had red shoes Well them shoes Guess who's Ten shoes Your ma gave ten shoe like ten shoes Are you gonna win a tournament to battle two youngs And then lose Fucking knob it Now I'm well aware that this rapper's harmful But this fella's bare can take a massive assful I listened to his album I couldn't wait for the tune to stop and settle there Like past the parcel So the second air said confirmed I went on YouTube then I said Lego vase I took a look at some results that then returned And I got to Marvel Try it It is fucking brilliant It works Marvel, Lego, Lego vase, Marvel thing Use it all thick once That's what you get for trying to be clever When they're expecting mum Your mum's a slag I'll fucking pump a gash with fucking lumps Of that stuff that comes out me knob Fucking, lad, lad, you fucking I'll leave you shook like that random shit Got a better reaction than all the actual goodbyes Fucking mum's ass Fucking ass gay United States A fucking pat stays Ash tray I don't even know what I'm going on about Where did the girl? Can we remember? Doesn't matter For that he's a cheeky consummate But at the end of the day Like what we're going to go with next There's something to do with fucking Hold on one minute I'm not even choking I'm just telling you There's something to say Listen I watched your last fucking two battles You weren't at your best I wasn't that impressed I thought this man's a mess Because you lost to Ogmios When you said he was bad at chess And you got beat by Blizzard When he tapped his chest How was that? I can't beat box You also lost to Lee Scott He beat you out You re-box You fucking be sitting in the tree top He wants to beat from leaf dog But he'll never be what he wants to beat Cos he's got more chance of getting a 16 From Pete Roth Fuck off Alright, let's go, let's go Final round, will you? Now you know I always got this wagga man Funny you mentioned Afro man Cos this guy looks like him He's just a fat, flabby man The type to smack a fan Now fuck that He's only ever happy with a hefty bag of white But what you didn't know is that's a devil's paradise And when you battle You always forget the raps you write This is if you've been getting flashed With the men in black device And in your mirror match You called yourself an actual nuns What, I don't have a response So you ain't fucking with this Y'all, lads, shawms Black, short, fat, bald, twat Motherfuckin' head looks like a ballsack Rorschach, Tesco, this fellow I'll be slightly blunt There's a million reasons Why I think that Michael's dumb Number one You lost your license for driving drunk Imagine if the entire spun You'd be another Ryan Dunn Number two You ruined your cousin's wedding And that doesn't need a punchline You fucking cretin' Number three You're in need of some help You got banned from dog flop For being yourself See, nobody wants to accommodate your traits Cos your life is more up and down Than an oscillation wave So never would you wash away the pain You look like every English man That goes on holiday to Spain Number four You're a racist Face facts He loves pee money But he hates blacks So you've got a wonder So you've got a wonder I bet your favourite black person is Robert Downey Jr. in Tropic Thunder He played a brilliant part Tropic Thunder Better than you are, shite Tropic Thunder And that's a white guy Yes, he tells them white lies Plus you love them white lines You're a racist guy Why? But then it hit me Now most of it's clear It's because you've been or shared a shadow For most of your career I'm in Liverpool This shit was over once I picked up the pen So this is my friend The shit that I got for the lizard This kid is a different blend I did it again Stop it, this is the clock It's ticked again Happy 7.30 And I'm kidding them off A minute to 10 Now this sucker went and did me dirty I thought it were 90 seconds He'd come here with 2 minutes 30 Look at that I couldn't give a shit about the time limit Like your last round I'm a freestyle for like 5 minutes All you scousers Sound as hell But this scouser's going to rob the motherfucking rounds as well I don't give a fuck I will rip him up It's freestyle In it mush I got my middle fingers up In your face This a mate Nothing you spit is great I'll serve you up like fish fillet On a fucking dinner plate That's right I'll smack this faggot clown You could never have the crown Why'd you come here to the battleground Dressed in some black-ass hand-me-downs No one knows Because you haven't got the nicest wraps I should break you like fibreglass When I hit you with a Tyson jab But at the same time You haven't got Fuck Michael swag You've got to have dance moves like Michael Jack Fuck you in your 90s hat That's right Let's go