 Bismillahir Rahmanir Raheem. Alhamdulillah, O Lord of the worlds, May Allah bless our beloved Syedina Muhammad and his family. May Allah bless his family and his family. Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullah wa barakatuhu, everyone. Thank you so much for joining us for MCC's new Muslim Ramadan Stories series. Today, Alhamdulillah, we have to stay with us. Assalamu alaikum. Wa alaikum as-salam wa rahmatullah wa barakatuhu. Thank you so much for joining us today and being willing to share your story with us. Let's get started. Tell us a little bit about yourself. OK, Bismillahir Rahmanir Raheem. Thank you so much for giving me this opportunity to talk with you guys all. OK, so I have been Muslim for seven years in February. And I've been a part of this community for like maybe six years. The first year, I was a little isolated. And I live in the East Bay. And I have three kids, a six-year-old daughter, and then 10 and 15-year-old sons. I, what else, thought myself, I'm a Latina convert. So my parents are my mother's Mexican. My father's a Aurelio. And as we know, there's a big influx of Latino converts. So I think that's awesome. Because definitely, it's a beautiful thing to see. And I'm hoping, inshallah, my family members join that influx of people. Inshallah, I mean, mashallah, mashallah. OK, so let's take it back. So you said you've been Muslim for about six years, right? Seven. Seven years, OK, mashallah. So can you tell us about your first Ramadan? Do you remember how you felt going into it? And what do you remember most about that first Ramadan? OK, alhamdulillah. So my first Ramadan, I actually was pregnant with Nahima, my daughter. So I remember, I took my shahada in February. And at that time, Ramadan was around July. Because I remember she was a Ramadan baby. Mashallah. And I don't remember too much detail about it. But I do remember that a lot of it, I think just a lot of it, since it was so new, I honestly don't think I knew exactly what needed to be done during the first Ramadan. And also, in addition to that, I was taking care of a newborn baby. So the very first one, I think I was very disconnected, but not for negative reasons, but more for things that just naturally made me disconnected. I had a newborn baby. I was a new Muslim. And I wasn't really, I didn't know a lot of people in the community. So the very first one, I think was, yeah, I didn't really feel that Ramadan in a way. So upon all. OK, so then let's talk about your second one. How is it different? And did you do anything in between your first Ramadan and second Ramadan that helped you have a different experience or be more into it? Yeah, so OK, great question. So the second Ramadan, in between that, I definitely did try to connect with community members. And in addition to me not remembering, because it's been so long ago, my memory's also not the best. Mommy brain. But I do remember the second Ramadan. I think that's the one that I first felt like some moments of loneliness. And I think as converts, we've all, a lot of us, not all, but a lot of us have been through that moment of feeling disconnected because we knew. And we really don't know a lot of people. And so I remember one thing in specific. I remember I went to the masjid. I'm pretty sure it was my second Ramadan. I went to the masjid. And then there was some sisters there. And she said something, one of the sisters, she said something around, oh, yeah, like I saw her last night at Iftar. And I was like, you guys get together for Iftar? And I was like, oh my god, people actually get together. So like this whole concept of like families, like celebrate, like break their fast together. You don't have to be home alone. And I remember like that was so new to me. So that's when I started trying to like, kind of like reach out. But I think one of the things that is really prevalent amongst new Muslims, because I remember I felt it was like being shy to ask or finding a way to ask like, hey, can I go to your house for Iftar, you know? And so, and not only that, but I had three kids at the time who were young. And so it was hard. It was kind of weird to just think of myself going to someone else's house for Iftar with three young kids, right? Especially like a one-year-old name. It was like one at that time. And so I remember it was more about like trying to find ways to connect and trying to find, at the same time learning like, you know, what was Ramadan gonna look like for me? Like what are the special moments of Ramadan? Like, what am I supposed to be doing? Because remember I just had a baby. So I was like focusing a lot on like her. And so as Ramadan got closer, the second time I was trying to focus on like, okay, what are Ramadan about? What do I have to do? So I think the first two to three Ramadan were kind of around that third one was a little better, but it was more about like learning like what I had to do and also being, you know, exposed to this idea of like, oh, like, you know, I can have Iftar with other people, I don't have to be alone. But definitely that sense of loneliness was there that I've heard other converts kind of go through, you know. So Pa, that's such a good reminder for us, that is that for, you know, people to open their homes. If they know any new Muslims to open their homes to their friends, new Muslim friends, especially who don't have, you know, convert, you know, family that they can spend Iftar with or break the fast with, masha'Allah. I agree. And also like finding a way to invite them, because like I remember specifically like not knowing, first of all, I wasn't going to go to someone to say, hey, can I come over, you know? But then also like, I didn't know many people to ask at the moment. Like I remember there was one sister who had a baby around the same time I did. So I think I felt comfortable just with her, you know? And maybe a few other sisters, but I didn't know a lot of people. So I think one thing, and I'm glad you mentioned that, because that's one thing I wanted to kind of include in this part of it was to encourage Muslims in our community, like to not wait for a new convert to say like, hey, can I come over? Because that's kind of weird, you know? But to say, you know, it's even just like casually asked, like if we know they're a new convert, or it's one of their first Ramadan, it's not just the first. But to ask them, like, what are you doing for Ishtar? What do your Ishtar look like? Like, who are you hanging out with? You know, and I think that's a good way to kind of get them to open up and possibly, you know, have an opportunity to fight them over. Subhanallah, Masha'Allah. Thank you so much for sharing that. OK, so let's move on then. Let's, I mean, even including those first three of Ramadan's, what would you say has been the biggest struggle or struggles that you've faced during Ramadan? In general, right? In general? Yes. Yeah. I think one main struggle for me has always been just sahur, because for many reasons, there's many parts, play parts that, that different aspects that play a part in it, right? Like, like getting used to getting up early in the morning and eating and having an appetite, right? But then also, I've definitely noticed now that my sons are fasting, that the last Ramadan, it's been easier for me to do sahur because I get up and I eat with them, right? And the water, as before, it was just me and it's harder. So that was always difficult for me. First of all, getting up early, then not having an appetite and then kind of forcing myself to eat. And in like sahur, obviously, it's not like, it's not a fun. It's not necessary that you have to do that before you fast, but it is something that is encouraged, it is sunnah. And so I think it's just nice to do it and it makes it a little easier to fast during the whole day. So having someone there to do sahur with makes it easier. That's always been a struggle for me. And I remember once there was a sister who came over, you could just sleep over her and her kids and me and my kids, and we did sahur together. And that was one of the funnest sahur's we ever had. And it was one of the easiest ones because it literally felt like a party, like a three morning, getting up and doing it together. So that's made that a little bit easier. So that was one, that's one struggle that comes to mind. I mean, I know there's probably others, but that's one that kind of is prevalent in my head. And I can imagine that's a common one for a lot of single converts who are living by themselves and so far are getting up by themselves for sahur every day. And that's just such a huge struggle. We don't think of it as a struggle, but doing it by yourself is a big one. I remember one brother, he mentioned how in a lecture he was giving, how he remember, he was giving a story of how he remembered he would get up when he was in his parents' house, wake up and then grab like a cereal bar or an apple from the fridge because it was his parents' home and then walking out and that was a support, right? And it's like when he said that, like it totally pulled at the strings of my heart because I was like, oh my God, like I can connect with that. And I'm pretty sure there were other Muslims who felt that. And so it's not just about not eating in the morning, but it's like the whole, everything around it, like not having anyone there or even having to sneak in something to eat in the morning for sahur because you're the only convert or the only Muslim in your home. And so, bahamda Allah, as the years go by, it gets easier, which is, I think it's like, you don't know, I heard this recently, like you don't know what daylight looks like unless you know the darkness. And so like you really appreciate having someone to have support with when you've been on the opposite side of that. So, bahamda Allah, mashallah. Okay, so how about on the flip side? Can you tell us a special Ramadan moment or memory? Yeah, oh my God, so many. Let me see, let me see, sorry. I know I should have totally like, I'm not going to say it earlier. Okay. I think, oh, I remember one. I remember one where we went to Ta'alif and they had a Qiyam. And that one was really special because Aisha Prime was there. And so it was beautiful because I think that was one of my first Qiyams. And so I didn't know exactly what to do, but it was like, you know, just her talk was amazing. Being around all these other sisters there was amazing. Staying up all night, you know, just making dua to Allah was amazing. And then having that amazing food that Ta'alif always has afterwards was amazing. And so it was a great experience. And that kind of opened up the path for me to do that with other people or even by myself, you know? And so that was a great experience. And I haven't done it with my kids, but I definitely want to have a day when I do Qiyam with my kids there. You know? I think my youngest might fall asleep, you know? So like my son, like, you know, in my middle son, he's really much all I really into is Dean right now, Alhamdulillah, so maybe doing it with him, I think would be really fun. But that night was really, really, really fun. Not only because it was like a combination of being in community and then being in a space that, you know, I consider like a very comfortable space and like, you know, a family's home, I guess you can say, you know, like it's a very, it's a very dear space to me. And then having that connection with Allah, with all those people around and then top it off with good food. That's it in the morning. It was, it was awesome. Subhanallah, Mashallah, and I want to mention that we're talking about Ta'alif in Fremont. Mashallah, it's a beautiful organization. May Allah reward Ta'alif and grant them success in their mission. I mean, okay, so, okay. So this is an interesting one. So in the Project Lena book by Anzeh Tamara, she talks about, or she and Anzeh Nadia talk about creating nostalgia for yourself and your family. You know, we grew up with different religions, right? We weren't born Muslims. So growing up, we had different traditions and celebrations that, you know, when we think of, you know, they pull at our heart strings in some way because there's nostalgia associated with them. So as new Muslims, we're able to create traditions for ourselves, new traditions. So I was wondering if you have started any new traditions for your family and also like, what have you pulled into it? Like your Latina, you mentioned that your Latina, did you pull in any Latina foods or anything like that into your traditions that you may have started for Ramadan? That's a great question. That's a fun question. So I know definitely one of the traditions we started that is a tradition that they come amongst a lot of Muslims is moon sighting. And so we try to make it a fact to go every beginning of Ramadan to sight the moon. And this year was amazing. There's a lot of Muslims, you know, given COVID just with the last couple of years, so many people were ready to go moon sighting. Everybody was out in full force. Yes, so I know at the Lawrence Hall of Science and at MCC and at Mount Samal Pais, there was a lot of families in all three places, which is amazing. So that definitely is a tradition that we try to keep. And in addition to that, we always like try to remember to bring like bags of cookies or like the little glow-in-the-dark lights. Because I think one of the first Ramadan's where me and the kids went up to go moon sighting, I remember it got so dark. All you can see was kids running around with the little lights. Like somebody gave out like little ring lights and it was so cute. Like everywhere. That is such a good idea, Masha'Allah. It was amazing. And not only can you make sure they don't leave, you know, the premises, but you know, see where they are, but just the fact that, you know, you see all these lights everywhere, you know, it was really nice. So we try to always have glow-in-the-dark lights and cookies or treats. So that's definitely part of that tradition. And then we always decorate. I do like a big thing around decorations because I want the kids to see that Ramadan is very special for us, you know? So we go all out with decorations. I wish I could show you the decorations we have right now. And then we also have a calendar. So we do a calendar and we have two. We have one calendar that marks the Ramadan night and one calendar where we put treats in there. And I didn't get a chance to put that one up because that one's handmade and I didn't have time. But in each envelope, I always put like a little treat, you know? Like a chocolate for each kid. And so each night, and we usually switch off either right after Maghrib or right, yeah, either right after Maghrib or right after we eat dinner, after we have Iftar, they get their candy out and then they move the little moon over to the next day. So that's like a little tradition that we have set up. And for now, I think those are the main ones. I'm trying to implement other ones. We usually try to always have a support night where we stay up late and we go meet with friends and we go have support like at, you know, some restaurants or something like Merchise or, you know, if we can't go that far, then Denny's or something. But, and I'm not promoting Denny's, I'm just not saying. And it's really fun. You know, it's a really fun night. So those are some of the traditions and I'm definitely trying to create other ones. Hallelujah, Masha'Allah. Okay, so, okay. So a bit of a tangent, Masha'Allah. I know that you recently were blessed with a chance to go to go for Omrah. So, and this was your first Omrah, Masha'Allah. So can you just share a little bit about your experience and then also tell us how, if and how your Omrah experience has changed your Ramadan experience this year so far. And it's only been a few days, but, you know. Okay, Masha'Allah. So, yeah, hallelujah, Omrah was amazing. It was just so many different experiences that I can't even, you know, like say them all. Like it was amazing, it was beyond what I expected. And that's, you know, with the claws of, I didn't know what to expect, right? So it was like beyond whatever I would have expected. Yeah, whatever I would have expected it was beyond that, right, it was amazing. And I think the group of people we went with played a big part of that. I think we definitely created a family. There was like 44 people, I think, from all over the country. And there was a few from the Bay Area. And even the ones who went from the Bay Area, I didn't know them. I knew one person, everyone else. I teed them around a few of them, but I didn't know them. And I think the fact that we created that family circle was amazing. It just made the experience so much more better than, you know, I guess it being just me and by myself or people I didn't connect with. And I think that definitely was a blessing from Allah. And it definitely, it definitely, it's so crazy because even though, you know, we came back end of December, and it's only been a few months, I think with how hectic life is, I was already like reacclimate it. I acclimated to like, you know, the way that life is here, like hectic and crazy and busy and overwhelmed. And so I quickly like kind of started losing that touch, that a feeling of like, you know, the different lifestyle and being connected to Allah because of life here, you know, and I was trying my best to stay connected to it, but it was so hard. And so with Ramadan here, I'm so glad that it's here because I think I can definitely go back to a lot of the memories from Umrah. And I feel like I learned a lot from Umrah, from the teachers that were there that will help me, you know, kind of ground myself and be more focused on what I need to be focused on during Ramadan. And one of the things I think that's really special that, you know, one particular thing is that I have these dates, these Ajwa dates that Sister Zaynab gave us. And these are dates that are from the farm for Salman al Farsi, you know, like when they had to buy off the farm in order to gain its freedom from its layholder. And so those dates are amazing. And so I'm usually not a date fan. And so this is the first Ramadan that I'm actually eating dates every Sahur. And it's actually made a big difference for many reasons. It actually helps hold the past easier. And I'm not forcing myself to do sunnah, which is have a date. And it just feels so, there's something special about like eating a date from a blessed farm that came directly from, you know, from Mecca, I think in Medina, from Medina. And I'm just very grateful to Sister Zaynab for making that opportunity happen, for sending that up. And so I feel like I definitely, it's a big part of this Ramadan. And the kids too, like, they don't like dates, but they love those. And my mom has been like, I have like three packs of dates from, you know, different people who gave me some. And she always goes for the Ajwa dates. And so, you know, like, she liked them as well. So it's just one of those special tokens in this Ramadan. And I'm hoping, inshallah, that, you know, years later, I can look back and remember, I like those Ajwa dates as a special part of this Ramadan, inshallah. Mashallah, mashallah. Okay, so we're down to our last question, Alhamdulillah. What advice would 2022 Lizzat give to the Lizzat of seven years ago when you were first experiencing, you know, Ramadan or your first, you know, as a new convert, basically what advice would you give that Lizzat as you embark on Ramadan? And, you know, at that time you were pregnant. So maybe it's a different thing, but just as a new Muslim, what would you give yourself? What advice would you give yourself? That's a great question. I would say to, I guess, I would say to try to find a way to be in community because I think it definitely makes a difference, you know? I would recommend, my advice would be for new Muslim Lizzat to find ways to be with community, to kind of, to go to the masjid and connect with people. So, you know, it won't be home alone, feeling lonely, to also study Quran because I know that and it doesn't have to be Arabic for more like, you know, to, it could be the English translation because I feel like that's a big part of Ramadan that I didn't really know, you know, was like a key part of Ramadan until years later, you know? And I think it definitely is a great opportunity to connect to the Quran and to gain a lot of wisdom in our knowledge from it, so focusing on that. But I think key, key would be like, try to be in the community because you can get a lot of, a lot of all of that within the community. You know, you see people reading Quran, you also might get invited to Iftars or nowadays, you know, I don't know if they had it back then, they probably did let it know, you know, go to Iftars at the masjid. And so I would definitely say just be in community and that makes it very, you know, it makes it very, it makes it easier, very special and it removes that lonely. So that's like the, I guess a key advice out here. Hamdallah, Mashallah. It's a beautiful advice, Mashallah. Subhanallah, so many people took Shahada in the last couple of years and with the pandemic, it's just, I can't imagine how hard that was. And I'm sure there was a beauty and blessing that came with that and being in solitude, but Subhanallah definitely being in community is, you know, makes such a big difference. I just actually, I'll share it with you guys just because, yeah, I don't think anyone from our community will know anyone from there, but like my, not like it'll make a difference, but I recently got news yesterday from my mom and I'm trying to verify this that my, one of my cousins from, he's kind of, he's kind of like an adopted cousin. His son is Muslim and his son is 15, he took Shahada. And so she said, she told me, you know, your auntie told me that so and so, you know, as Muslim and I was like, are you serious? So I'm trying to get in contact with him and I'm so excited like he grew up with my son. They used to play together all the time. My son is 15 as well. And I'm just like praying to Allah that, you know, it's correct and it's valid only because in the Latino culture, Latino community, sometimes they'll confuse Islam with other religions like anyone that, you know, in terms of like, they might, like somebody might be Hindu and because they look Arab to them, they'll say, oh, they're Muslim, but they might be Hindu or something and they might be another religion. And that's what I'm saying. Like I'm hoping that he can, you know, that it is valid because I'd have another family member to be able to spend Ramadan with. So I'm really excited about that. That's a special thing that just happened yesterday. And so inshallah. That would be amazing, inshallah, it's true. And I can inshallah bring him to the masjid. I really hope that I get in contact with him. So please make sure that Allah connects us because I don't know how to get in contact with him but I hope I do. Inshallah, inshallah. Okay, Lizette, thank you so much and Jazakallah Khair for spending the time with us to share your story. We really appreciate it. And to everyone who was watching, thank you so much for watching and listening in on the Ardni Muslim Ramadan story series. And I may Allah make this Ramadan the best yet for all of you and all of us. I mean, thank you so much, Yusuf. And then for always spending time to do this and giving your time and commandment, may Allah reward you and preserve you and allow you to do many more things like this for us in the community. I mean, and Jazakallah Khair. Wa alaykum. As-salamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh. Wa alaykum.