 hi she was seven it is story time i have a story time yes okay now i know i'm always giving advice and talking to y'all but i thought let's switch it up let's do a story time okay so y'all can know a little bit more about me so this story time is going to be about an obsessive x actually i've had more than one so i'm going to tell you about each one i'm not going to use any names and anything like that um so my first obsessive x was um he was older than me of course because i don't date younger guys uh so he was older than me we dated for like two years okay and he was the definition of a bum okay broke not having a pot to piss in just nothing okay i was 18 when i met him maybe i was 17 i don't remember 18 i think new to the game um and of course i fell in love with looks so he was tall very handsome had a deep voice you know um you know nice curly hair whatever so i fell for that okay and being the young naive girl that i was i fell in love quick and i fell in love hard and he'd like in the in the relationship it was not mutual in the beginning like i liked him way more than he liked me okay um because you know i don't know he had like all his exes at least the one that i saw looked way better than me okay but he was broke and he was living in someone's back room actually he was living in his ex-girlfriend's grandmother's back room okay this is how broke this fool is okay and she didn't live there anymore okay but her sister did and her and her kids so the worst situation though was possible okay so i dated him for two years and he was the kind of person who was all talking no action right he would always lose his job he would always he can't work for people because he had a bad attitude and he's older than me like by at least 10 years maybe a little bit more right and you know i'm getting myself together i'm going to school i'm getting good jobs that and now i'm making more money than him as a 19-year old okay this has to be a slap in your face right so i start getting around men with more money and i start seeing the situation and all these guys with money are now attracted to me and like trying to ask me out and things and i'm just with this broke bum and i'm like yeah um there's something that's not right you know i love that bum but there was nothing he could do for me anymore it's like he was just taking up important space and time in my life you know we weren't moving in a certain direction we were at a standstill because he was at a standstill and i was growing and he wasn't so i started seeing another person on the side and i was going to break up with my with him with my my ex i was going to break up with him on my own time because i didn't want to hurt his feelings and say look i'm leaving you because you broke um so basically the new guy was dating knew i had the boyfriend i said i just got to break up with him i don't see him anymore i hardly even call him we're just still together and name so um i think my ex felt like i was pulling away from him so he comes up to my job with like food which he has never done he he got a job try to get himself together because he knew i was going to go okay um but it wasn't like you know the greatest job it was just a job and so he came brought me some food to my job and i'm working with the guy that i'm dating and so he walks up into my job and the guy that i'm dating gets upset he's like what are you doing here man what are you doing here you're not supposed to be here um this is you know private property and blah blah blah blah so i had a hickey on my neck and my ex saw the hickey and he's just like he wasn't my ex at the time we were still together he saw the hickey he just started his eyes started tearing up like oh my god he just started crying and i never seen him cry before i'm like oh my god um so he rushes out and leaves leaves the food and rushes out just speeds away and i could see him looking with tears down his eyes and i'm like really okay you had showed that much interest in me in the beginning and had this much ambition in the beginning maybe things would have been okay because he's 10 years older than me okay so i was kind of like well it's done now we're free you know so then me and my new boyfriend we go out to karaoke like a couple nights later and this is the spot that i used to go with my ex all the time so i'm in the karaoke putting my song yeah back then i used to smoke a little cigarettes when i go out or whatever i don't smoke no more um that was like so long ago and i was young and stupid but i was like holding it up like a little cigarette trying to be cool and it wasn't lit or anything so i was just holding it there and then all of a sudden someone with the lighter comes by like in in the darkness it just lights it for me and i look up and it's my ex boyfriend standing there and he's like so what are you doing here did you bring him here this is our spot i'm like this is not our spot i used to come here wait before i met you so basically we me and my new boyfriend we get upset you know we leave and we're walking to the car and my ex pops out of nowhere and starts fighting the new guy just fighting him throwing him throwing him against cars you know alarms going off people calling 911 and so uh my ex was a lot taller than my new boyfriend so he just like slammed right and so then my ex grabbed me and he was dragging me down like uh the parking lot like pulling me to go with him like and i was resisting you know and he was just pulling me to his car like trying to basically kidnap me and i'm like no he's trying to kidnap me call the cops calling 911 he's trying to kidnap me so um the cops finally came when he was still like dragging me not i wasn't being drugged but he was pulling me like trying to force me to walk a certain way and i was pulling back no so he was pulling me he's like get in the car i'm like i'm not going with you and the cops came he let go and started running the cops chased them and caught them and then they put them in the back of the car and they were like driving off and he was in the back seat and the cops were like are you do you want to press charges on him i said no he's just crazy um i think he learned his lesson but if he bothers me again i will be putting no strain in order so i guess i kind of felt sorry for him so i didn't really press any charges um so yeah after that i hadn't seen him till like years and years later at a gas station walking like i don't know he was still a bum y'all he was basically more of a bum then like he lost even more i think he was homeless at that point i'm like oh my god what did i ever see in that bum you know and i was truly in love with him and you know at that young age you don't see you know you only see the good things in people the best in people the potential in people you don't see them for who they are you don't see them for who they're going to be in their future you're just young and dumb okay so ladies i've been there done that um don't do it okay it's not worth it um another another obsession boyfriend story uh let's see oh i think i told this story a long time ago um what's okay it was a it was a police officer i think he was a sheriff and like i had went on two dates with him like two dates with him like but he used to see me all the time he was like really infatuated with me because like i worked in the funeral home and he was always working security like for his little extra side gig as a sheriff for the funerals and he would always see me he was always trying to talk to me ask me out and he was he was cute but like again i couldn't go backwards in life he did not have you know things going for himself he was just kind of very satisfied with his present situation and i wasn't i was not about that life you know he lived in a really rundown house in the bad neighborhood you know all he wanted in life was you know a wife to live in that house with him i'm like no you know i have bigger dreams i have bigger plans plus you know um um i wasn't attracted to him enough to be his wife or anything you know we just went on two dates but he was talking about marriage and what you're gonna cook for he was like real southern he was like well i have other women bringing me plates and dishes i'm like well that's them i don't cook for me unless i'm married to them and they got some money on them like i was he would laugh i'm like i would be at a funeral he would be standing outside or awake which was in the evening and some random woman would just drive by what a what a um Tupperware dish full of just like home cooked food and just give it to him like here go baby and she would drive off they would talk for a second she would drive off and he was like see that's supposed to be you that's supposed to be you bringing me some food i'm like no it's not that's supposed to be her you you're chasing me but she's cooking see who's who's got the better than the deal i said you taking me out to eat she's cooking you food that's okay and so after a while kind of disappeared and stopped working in the funeral industry because i met the man that i did marry and he's still that that sheriff still called my house for like three years after i was married my mom's house looking for me and my mom finally told him look she's married uh she's not she don't live here no more you know she's gone so he called my house three years looking for me other people too they're like calling me like years after i'm married looking for me at my mom's house i'm like i'm not there um so the thing is you know i always knew who i was and what i was going to be and what i wanted and you know a lot of men they didn't know who they were that or they that they could do better and i wasn't going to settle no um there were even guys that i used to date that did have a little something something but they didn't have the lifestyle that i wanted you know what i mean so it was like nope can't do it they want you to put on a church hat in a a suit and go church and be a uh a deacon wife no that's not me you know what i've had many people like well i can clean you up i can fix you up i can make you a good righteous woman i don't want to be no good righteous woman i want to be who i am okay you can't change me and i can't change you so let's just call it what it is you know they they would like actually look me up and down and say oh you would look good and this big old church lady hat and this yellow suit like this is like really do i look like i would wear something like that oh yeah you'd be good and you know uh no i don't even like that type of environment don't even put me in it you know the only reason i was ever in church or wearing suits was because i was at funerals okay you won't catch me there if i don't have to be there if i'm not being paid to be there i won't be there okay um so there was even a pastor of a church that wants to date me i mean i still get emails and messages from him every now and then even though i am who i am they're married two girls and guys the pastor's married sending me text messages in my facebook talking about when we go meet up how about lunch i i missed you blah blah blah and i it this is like uh 15 years later okay so when i say success is your best revenge moving on not settling doing way better it's the best revenge i promise you it is because i i went to this high profile funeral with my husband because one of his um colleagues or whatever passed away and the funeral home that i used to work for was doing the service and i'm sitting with all the rich people and i'm just looking at him work saying revenge success is the best revenge even if you have to marry for success it's still the best revenge okay it's hilarious to see their face when they're like what is she doing here dang she's sitting with them we're still working oh my god and you know that treated you so bad you know and then all of a sudden i get messages on facebook from my old co-workers who had crudges on me hi how are you doing yes i'm married goodbye you know so it's always good to be that one that always got away it's good to be that girl that people still obsess over it's still good to be that girl people call three years later after she'd been married it's good to be that person you know why because it means you didn't settle and it means you got out why you still could before it was too late like and they had no kids by none of those the guys because i was well aware that they could not give me what i wanted okay and i'm a very selfish person when it comes to that that's why i don't have those issues that non-selfish people seem to have because you know if if there's nothing that i want to do more in this world than to please myself that's what i'm gonna do you know i don't live to please other people okay because if i did that i would be very unhappy and not have anything that i wanted so ladies be selfish be that one that got away be that one that they still call three years later after you've been married be that girl okay don't make silly mistakes don't give them second chances unless they really do have something to offer you if there's nothing that they have that can benefit you move on okay because you'll have many more stories to tell and many more hearts to break okay i'll see you