 Item number SCP-2353 Object Class Euclid Special Containment Procedures SCP-2353 has been contained in a standard humanoid containment chamber and does not require any nutrition plan. All personnel in SCP-2353's presence are forbidden from wearing inappropriate garments, footwear, and accessories. The list of inappropriate clothing is fully detailed in Document 2353, but includes the following. Foam clogs, commonly known as crocs. White clothing, including laboratory coats, between the first Monday of September and the first day of spring. Any kind of flip-flopper sandals when worn with socks. Denim shorts, commonly known as jorts. Additionally, SCP-2353 is allowed access to a sewing machine and a rolling allowance of $35 USD a month to purchase magazines, fabric, and other equipment. Access to the sewing machine and allowance may be revoked as a disciplinary measure. Description SCP-2353 is a sapient, animate mannequin of 1.6 m in height and 2 kg in weight. It is composed of fiberglass with blue eyes, red lips, and light flesh tone painted on. It is capable of communicating in English, Spanish, Mandarin, Arabic, French, and Russian in a woman's voice. As SCP-2353 is completely hollow, it is unknown how it is able to speak. SCP-2353 reacts in a hostile and uncooperative manner when presented with humans wearing inappropriate clothing detailed in Document 2353. When presented with such clothing or accessories, SCP-2353 will often turn its back to the human and request for phone privileges in order to contact the United Nations. SCP-2353 was found in a chain-clothing department store attached to a mall. Video recordings of SCP-2353 contain evidence of SCP-2353 talking to itself while attempted to conceal or destroy articles of clothing it just approved of. The Foundation was alerted on October 10, 2015, when SCP-2353 stepped out of its display window and ran into the mall. The following is a video transcript of the event and an initial interview at its successful containment. Transcript 2353-01 Begin Log 1023 SCP-2353 is seen in a display window through a surveillance camera. Its head moves to the right without visible manipulation. 1024 SCP-2353 can be heard speaking. An unknown male entity can be heard talking to it, possibly one of the other mannequins. She gages on going. Oh no. This is the last straw. I've been working at this Macy's for the past five years and this is the last fucking straw. 1024 Unknown male voice. Damn it Stacey, calm down. They just gotta learn on their own. How many times have I gotta tell you? It ain't worth their jobs. Stacey. Stacey, please.... you, stay see me, please, Carl. I am not tolerating this anymore. The guy is wearing at least two sizes, too small. That muffin top is more like a mushroom cloud. SCP-2353 steps out of the display case and begins running towards a woman, accompanied by a man carrying bags of clothing. 10.25 SCP-2353 tackles the man and begins to try and remove his pants. With all due respect, what is wrong with you? Where are some proper sizes? No one wants to see squished sausage. 10.25 Man, what the fuck? Man begins to struggle with SCP-2353. 10.26 SCP-2353 successfully removes the man's pants. Shut up. There's a perfectly good gene sale going on at the Levi's, like three stars down to your right. Buy one, get 175% off. Get those poor people to give you a proper resizing for once in your goddamn life. Your balls will thank you. 10.28 Woman Is this some sick fucking PR stunt? I didn't consent to any of this. The woman physically assaults SCP-2353 with her purse. 10.30 SCP-2353 picks up one of the bags of clothing and physically assaults the woman with it. What the fuck is wrong with you, Miss? I saw you in the crock stores last week. There wasn't even a sale going on. You have, like, no excuses. Even that kind, poor fellow cash-sharing the down place was giving you the side-eye. 10.35 SCP-2353 and the woman continue to argue. Plain-clothed guards arrive to separate the two. The Foundation is alerted. 10.36 A guard has difficulty handcuffing SCP-2353 due to his lack of adequate range of arm movement. 10.40 SCP-2353 successfully escapes the grasp of the guard and flees downstairs. The guards pursue. 10.45 SCP-2353 stops to assault the woman's feet. Eh, are you blind? But the hell kind of frumpy sandals are these. Zebra print? There's a shoe store literally behind you. 10.46 SCP-2353 actually, I am legally- Oh, my God. I am so sorry. Miss, I've got an employee card and plenty of money I've never used. Come on, let's get one of our shoppings free during the one-day sale. Just because you can't see doesn't mean you can't look fit! 10.47 A plain-clothed guard forcefully maneuvers SCP-2353 to the floor. SCP-2353 is taken to a Holden cell for further containment by the Foundation. End Log Interview Log 2353-01 Date? October 10th, 2015 Interview E, SCP-2353 Interviewer, Dr. Kumalo Notes, this interview was conducted two hours under the Foundation's acquisition of SCP-2353. Begin Log Hello, SCP-2353. I'd like to ask you a few questions if you don't mind. Oh, my God. Ew, ew! SCP-2353 turns away from Dr. Kumalo. I'm sorry, is something the matter? Can I do something for you? Yeah, sure. I need to call the UN to report evaluation of the Geneva Conventions. What? After Labor Day? My God, not even secret organizations are safe. SCP-2353 refuses to communicate for the remainder of the interview. End Log