 Black men expect black men of that caliber expect black women to be women femininity a lot of y'all A lot of y'all men. Oh, no a hundred percent, but that's because it's not enough masculine energy around How can we be feminine? We can't make that excuse. What excuse see we didn't talk much. Oh, we're not talking about the scene We come out that one was saying You said we're masculine because there's not enough Masculine around what if men started saying we're feminine because there's not enough feminine energy around because I mean that's that's But we can't say that is my point Listen, it's the message right here black boy. Tell me how you really feel Because I just want to build with you black girl. Tell me how you really feel I want to keep it real with you. I want to live better eat better I want to love better sleep better. Yeah, I want to feel so aligned Of course, we want to treat him like a regular because all we knew all we know is regular We don't necessarily if like I said, that's how that goes back to the whole standards thing You know what I mean? Like if a man set his standards and what he doing what he doesn't know You know what he allows you come in my house. You got to take your shoes off You can't walk around my house on the shoes on it's the same way with conversation. It's the same way with how At a kissy, you know you a lot of men a lot of men don't hold hold doors But I've been blessed enough to be if I'm about to touch a door. I don't touch that door And but that's not every man So but I don't expect every man to be that way. But when I that's why I naturally go open the door for myself But I know next time when I'm with this man, I better not touch that door So it's on him that his ex-girlfriend will treat him like a regular person Because if he didn't remind her that she that he wasn't regular that's on him Sis you used to this but this ain't this Usually he allowed her to carry on Sorry so That's interesting Right now a lot of black men They are saying I think I think the acronym is sys Bl save yourself black man. Okay, and the movement is all around this concept of African-american black women are fundamentally broken So instead of sticking around and trying to fix them and trying to check them and put them in their place Go to Thailand go to Africa go to South America Get you a canadian woman, right? I mean y'all being an angel Other races but it's some movement now. It's been a movement. That's why black women so mad like we see here We got to deal with broken men And we're not you know what forget this i'm going to get me a tommy. No a tommy just came over and he just treated me better That's why i'm with him He treated me like how I feel like I should be treated, you know what i'm saying because at the end of the day He's doing he's moving that way He's not you know, he's just moving a different way not necessarily saying we don't We love black men. We'll get to time. We're not we're not letting go of like me and like you just said oh, man Forget this y'all we can't fix these women. Let's go to Thailand or turn up or go somewhere else and get a woman What y'all just really just tell me that y'all really just brought to break our household When at the end of the day we both broken and really the only person that could fix the home is the black man Because black men helping other black men is the only way we're going to be able to Oh able to throw a correction correcting your homeboy. He talked about he got five different shortly like bro Why you got five girls like Bro, you let you raw dog in him too. So you don't care about no kids like oh, so you oh So if you have a kid, you're not gonna beat it, you know certain things, but those aren't conversations Those aren't the men who are leaving. Well, I mean we're talking about the one percent. It's the good dudes that are leaving. Yeah So the good dudes that i'm talking about they've already done the work and they're like I shouldn't have to babysit somebody I think the problem a lot of times it just I just don't understand how men can't find no women in the ratio We're just so high I just cannot that's one that is one thing. I cannot believe I can't believe it What what do you what do you think it is? That men they they're just as cocky as women they feel like they should have a certain type of woman Just like we just we feel like we should have a certain type of man That's just a fact. So it's like we Men make it such a big rar about women wanting to certain You know, we want to raise our standards or be a certain way, but men y'all we all want a certain type of women knowing That we are damaged from other men You got us are you ain't getting as fresh out the With no experience from no other man no trauma no nothing, you know, I mean like granted Yeah, people say you start to slink clean slate, but once a movement is you know, it's kind of like a If you sound like a trigger warning like something happened like if you moved a certain way, dang man, I remember Okay, so that's how All men must move So what do you think what do you think women are doing wrong? Oh, man, we don't I mean We definitely can't we communication definitely needs to help You know happen a better way of communicating for women for sure. What is that better way? Huh, what is the better way because we say it a lot, but we never actually define it I think women are terrible listeners Really? Absolutely Well, I guess I just I can only speak from oh, I can only speak for myself with that Um, because I I can listen I listen very well. I think the only issue is when people think I'm not listening just because I don't uh Because I my response is my opinion You know I'm saying like a lot of times like I hear you I understand what you're saying or more so my perspective I'm giving you now. I'm giving you my perspective not necessarily saying that you're wrong But I mean today what you what you saying has that has that been effective? I think so explain Hmm I guess sometimes people just need to come or when it comes to me come to me and tell me that you're venting And not that you want that you don't want a conversation Because When I was just sitting here Mm-hmm No, I'm gonna give you A conversation or we're gonna talk about it. We're gonna I mean But my question has that been effective like your disposition towards conversation has that been effective Was it just one of those things? Oh, you just gotta take the deal with the bag Oh, you're gonna take the deal with the bag I mean, I gotta say real everybody gotta say good and bad I mean if not, then we just only looking for good and now y'all in thailand trying to go ahead and get But you don't think that's a problem And then my question to you is then like Why would a man who's done the work to become a one percent dude Deal with that. Oh now one percent man. I'm not doing it You know what I'm saying? I know he's not a regular man. You feel me? I know I don't have to It's I guess what we thrive for and it's like it'll be so awesome Even if the non one percenters could even just have the mindset of the one percenters because it's really the mindset And the domination and the for sureness The confidence the like I did like I I am who I am because I build who I am A lot of black men don't know who they are So it's like we you know, we're trying to help as I said, it's only going to take black men to help other black men figure out who they are Because So that sounds good here's the problem when uh When kevin samu was talking about like why he transitioned because you know at first he was talking about men Why he transitioned to talking about women? He said that um As I was coaching these men as I was improving them and you know, they make a lot of money's men make 300 200 thousand dollars a year Teaching them how to dress style the whole night They came back and told me that they couldn't find any good women Mm-hmm When I hear a lot of women talk about that a lot of times it's oh, they're not trying hard enough Or how can they not find the women this with this ratio? There's never any talk of what the women are doing wrong And yeah, black women are doing a lot of things wrong, but they don't want to take any responsibility for it Why is that are y'all saying what we're doing wrong? Y'all don't listen you give your opinion Okay, but we that's we supposed to just sit here and just be like What if you're wrong? We're gonna let you be wrong. Y'all want us to let y'all be wrong That's what it was or more foe figure it out, but it depends on what's telling you this Like if it's because at the end of the day I don't think you should listen to pookie and ray ray right exactly But the reason I don't think you listen into them is because you shouldn't be dealing with them in the first place Exactly, but here's the problem A lot of women pick pookie and ray ray How many pookie and ray ray you think it's out here a lot of pookie and ray ray Exactly, but my point is you pick pookie and ray ray You don't have the ability to to identify a high value man If if a high value nigga walk past a lot of women they wouldn't be able to see they got the swag and all that other bullshit that people like Um, but then when you get that high value man, you treat them like pookie and ray ray And then it's still his fault when he decides I don't want to deal with that I told you he should have set the standards early This is this is what should she have done? She yeah, what should she have done? Because you said Study men date more like date different type of men. That's the only way we're gonna know That's the only way we're gonna know men are different. You don't think that like adds more baggage Dating dating Mormon No Minute, I mean, I'm not saying have sex with more men. I'm saying just date. It's hard. It's hard Because I mean, it's hard because I mean, that's I mean naturally men. I guess that's really what they do But my question is if if black women have it so figured out But you guys act like you do Because we confident It's bullshit though. It's not real If y'all were confident as we were we would be a whole another We would be on a whole another planet black women black men Would just literally be on a whole another planet kicking and by ourselves just two cocky people together This cocky wrong, I will be wrong because y'all's confident isn't basing anything Yeah, it's based off of how you guys treat us more. So that's not we it's like I would I say that is more so treat women as the catch or more so like I'm not gonna say nothing, you know what I'm saying because I don't want to lose her or You know certain things of that nature when it comes to that's not in the relationship Matter of fact at one of my interviews The girl said that chaos Pieces scarier than chaos And how she explained that she said that a lot of us grew up in chaotic situations Okay, so normal for us is chaos So even when we are confronted with peace or a good do we'll turn it into a chaotic situation because it's familiar to us So what I'm saying to you is You're saying all these things that black men should do should do should do But for the men that I know who are like that they have the toughest time with women So the idea is that if you do all these things, I will be A god-sit to you and it's like that's not the case That's not the case Everybody I know makes six figures and they're all black men And what do they expect black women to be like how like what is their I'm gonna I'm gonna say expectation of a black woman. I'm gonna say this very very like matter of fact And I hope it's not offensive. Oh no not at all Black men expect black men of that caliber expect black women to be women Femininity a lot of y'all the niggas a lot of y'all men. Oh no 100% But that's because it's not enough masculine energy around How could we be feminine? We can't make that excuse. What excuse say? We didn't talk much We're not talking about the seal we come out that one percent What I'm saying is you said you said we're masculine because there's not enough Masculinity around what if men started saying we're feminine because there's not enough feminine energy around because I mean that's But we can't say that is my point I guess it's because When when when women are raised we're raised to be strong We're not necessarily we don't necessarily know what even masculine really means You feel me to even say like oh you masculine because if I'm raised without my father and all I know is my mom So you telling me really my mom Is masculine? You feel me? So I really don't have a broad like a real sense of oh that's a nigga you act like a nigga But you prove my point you said because before you said that There are not enough men to go around and then you said men need to do this this this this and this And now you're saying that I don't know what masculine is no no no for a woman. Yeah for a man. Yeah, but it's the same energy Is it a man being masculine a woman being masculine masculine is masculine That's so now it doesn't look well. It doesn't look right when a woman does it But it's still masculine because what is masculine energy for on a woman. What do you think it is? It's hard to for me to know Um, I mean for me to say because I've had men say that I I do have like masculine energy I'll I'll I'll explain it in one word Agribileness Agribileness so Because men have been socialized to be competitive Okay, what that means is okay I can't just take what the world gives me. Okay. I have to chart my own course the whole night So if I'm presented with information, I have to first be critical of that information. I was saying, hmm Right, this is the math method Women on the other hand, but we're raised that way I understand that women on the other hand If you are going to be a queen, right? Okay, you have to submit under the authority of the king 100 so when the king says something it's you got it bad That's agreeableness 100 now the problem is a lot of women think they're kings How can I explain this? We were raised to think I mean not necessarily to think but with the possibility of being alone Men ain't really you know, you're not really, you know, it's either y'all expect that that might happen or but as a woman We're raised we're more so the old idea was to be okay We're gonna find a man and we're gonna be pretty much in his world. We're joined his world But over time i'm realizing y'all world y'all ain't got one y'all not even trying to build a world Who who are you talking about y'all? We ain't talking about you. We ain't talking about six figure babies And we ain't talking about them. Okay. So what are you talking about? Well, I mean we A lot of so you have to you have two choices. It's two different But you have two choices the perspectives you can either because if a man if if how can I say this I'm willing to submit to a man Who I trust to lead me if I don't trust you to leave me Too blind leading blind. No, not me because I'm not blind I was already leading myself before I entered into your world And now but I think I think women And I think women tend to especially are women they tend to undervalue their power I think women are extremely powerful. Okay, and that's what I mean by that And this is another point poetic style made he said the reason a lot of men are walking around with struggle beers Is because black women said they like their men be bearded Right In a lot of ways women dictate the market. Okay Women establish what they want to see in the world Even in marketing I used to work in marketing 80 percent of retail decision making is made by women If you work in real estate, you know that you have to convince the wife not the husband even though it says money Right, so women are extremely powerful. Feminine energy is extremely powerful. The problem is What if what if the problem is? Because I could say this for me back to you asking me I mean, like I said some some men but they're really like they're I can sense their masculinity Is a little bit higher than they say like I'm not as masculine because I mean I don't have to be masculine with them I don't feel the need to be Ra-ra, you know, it's it's it's weird when I don't work like that. I know it doesn't work that way But it's I'm sorry. It's like it's like dang am I might as well just get a dog or something because if I don't feel You know what I'm saying? Like I don't feel like with you. I feel the masculine energy You feel me? I feel the confidence in the I am a man You gonna respect me because I'm a man not you're gonna do that with another man But y'all don't do that with women We were supposed to click when we were never raised like we you know, we wasn't really raising our feminine energy But a lot of women might have been I mean, I know A lot of us were raised in in toxicity a lot of a lot of men I could play more about black men than I do about black women And a lot of what I complain about black men is that we're emotional And a lot of the reason black men are emotional is because they were raised around emotional energy They're around women, right? So we can have that conversation So that's why maybe but but the point I was trying to make is this as women are complaining about These average men that they're dealing with that they refuse to submit to in the whole night They have not taken the time to prepare themselves For the type of men that they say they want that's a fact And that's that's the that's the only problem. I'm not gonna lie to you That's the only it's like I'm complaining about clocking in and McDonald's But you're not getting a coding certificate to go work for google But you claim you you deserve a google job. It's like you don't you deserve exactly what you get And my thing my my biggest thing with women is this We talk about submission, right? And oh, I'm not gonna submit to a man who ain't ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba. The problem is you're still fucking that dude I wouldn't even say that it's ba-ba-ba-ba-ba. It's really how you carry Sure sure sure, but but but here's the thing. Where's the direction you want for your life? If I was not here Where would you be without me if I was not here you would be up under another woman You feel me moving the same way Here's the problem. There's there's a lot of cognitive dissonance with the conversation What I mean by that is If you bend over in front of a man open your legs that is submission Okay, so to draw arbitrary lines in the sand is I will submit physically But I won't submit mentally or I won't submit this way Either you submit to the man or you don't and if you can't trust a man My question to you is why are you with them? Why are you with them in the first place? You're right Wouldn't it be better to be alone or or take the time to prepare yourself for the type of man you say you want? Yes, once we have that idea Once we get that once we go through the journey and understand that that's really what it is But at that point you're because what's teaching us that but at that point you're 40. No, I'm already bitter Listen, I'm not talking about you. I know but realistically I put it in perspective Like I know exactly what you mean because that's exactly the journey that I'm on now You feel me? I took my 20s how you you know, you think you're gonna be married Like I said you as a woman who wants to submit I realize that you I can only submit to someone that Has their own journey Taking care of and now I fit in their world As opposed to me trying to join a world and I got my own thing going on and I'm kind of pulling you because Okay, go back to just regular or more so ordinary Is that better than regular? Ordering, I'm gonna say ordinary because I mean I don't know about you but I'm extraordinary Okay, this is extraordinary. Okay, we're not ordinary people. Okay, some people are it is okay to be ordinary it is okay, but The comparison is I mean the the the struggle with that is is okay. You may be ordinary But I gotta be out in a world. You don't you want me to be home with you watching tv Why are you with them? I'm not that's why I gotta go But then it's a problem that I left Because I want more dang like you can't just you couldn't just stay with them You couldn't just submit to what he got going on you forget that you don't need to worry about that He's gonna why were you with him in the first place is my point I think the problem is a lot of y'all fall in love with your idea of a man Not who he is or who he wants to be And inevitably you will think that oh, that's that's not what I want. So it's like why weren't you more Attentive to who he said he wanted to be I think it was what it what it what it was It wasn't that it was more. I accepted of the man. He was you didn't accept it. I did but if you're leaving It's not true except Yeah, I mean, that's not true The only reason why the only reason we the only reason why I left is because he wasn't there for me when my grandparents started Like certain things I can't accept But a lot of things I can because I was surprised by that Yes Because I because he was my best friend. You feel me? He was literally someone that like, you know Over time you feel me like or more so after you go through the situation you look back and you see all the pin points And in the hands or whatever. Yeah, I might have accepted a lot I didn't expect him not to be there only because Like I said, I and here nobody else when we got together I had friends throughout our relationship things changed as far as my friendships went You know, so it was really just us and then towards even that part went point when my grandparents passed away We weren't even with me We weren't close close because there were certain things that that I did accept. I had to say like, okay No, you know start setting them standards if you want to marry me It's certain things you're going to have to To change or to be like you feel me like you you got to want more for yourself, sir Like it's only certain me like listen black women. We love black men We really be sitting here. You know, you think women ego. You're not, you know, you're not you're not Extraordinary not superior, but in reality it's like dang if I just expect more because I hear you talking or I hear you complaining Or if I hear you talking about how you want more and all I want to do is boost you and all I'm doing is boost you And this is on my own personal experience. This ain't based off no other black woman This is me as a black woman and I mean I've dated black men, you know, and I've Women are really we have to settle many many men are the ones that I'm going to take you and make you my wife We don't say oh, this is my boyfriend and you my no any given moment. That's not it I'm I'm gonna say this I think I think this is where women fuck up especially our women You prioritize the man you like over a man you admire so what I mean by that is A lot of times like when the relationship ends a lot of women will say in hindsight the signs were there this and that So for instance, you know, he ends up being a dead beat dad and things like that, right And part of the reason why you know, sometimes it seems like I lack empathy is like When you look at the signs and you look at the things that you qualified him based on They weren't things that translated into good dad You didn't prioritize honesty You didn't prioritize integrity. You didn't prioritize honor. You didn't prioritize discipline You didn't prioritize vision stick to itiveness Right, anybody can talk that shit, right? But like was this a man who was getting up and doing what he said he was gonna do At first it was that fact it was that and then over time I mean because I'm not like he was an artist, you know, he's an artist. He listen Listen, he was listen. It's it's real life But I'm gonna say here artists as I seen him make a whole album in the room And it was literally like he made it in the studio. That's how talented he was. I'm not going I'm a real part. I'm a real one, you know, if something don't sound good. I can't I'm not gonna be able to listen to it You know, so at first it was but then it was like his team dismantled Manager wasn't there his friends wasn't there. It was us going to the clubs and talking to the DJs and helping him understand if he's A business himself. He got to move for himself before anybody else moves for him to It's just I guess I'm just not the right black woman to talk to because I'm here for the black me I'll be over here like, okay. I accept it, you know, I'm here for you because at some point I said I'm older so I'm realizing, you know, when it is like, I mean not being technical with the submission with laying up with people But when it comes to being, you know, some submissive I understand that eventually your money is going to be our money. So I got to help you get to that I want to help you grind and understand because I believe in you Black man, you know what I mean? Like literally I believe in you because I see everybody else is not it's failing you But you're not over time. You're not really pushing yourself like And it's like now you telling me about things that I've already told you and I got to sit here and say I told you so now it's time for me to go. I'm gonna say this Our women need to stop fucking with creatives And this is why so What one of the interesting things that I read somewhere it said Romance was created by unemployed white artists So, you know, a lot of the concepts when we think about love and the butterflies and shit like that It was created by motherfuckers who just like sat around and looked at the sunset all day They didn't have jobs. They didn't have families to take care of so a lot of those things A lot of those things are unsustainable, right? And we fall in love with a lot of childish things that don't age very well And in our community in particular, we prioritize the rappers We prioritize the the musicians and the artists and all those eclectic professions that don't translate well over 2030 40 50 years right most of the time, but again Most of our women think they're extraordinary And that their case is going to be different and that this Gucci man is going to turn into that Gucci man And that's not how shit works. So again Well with this with those women, let me let me finish. Let me finish. So again, like The fact that he made an album in his room and it sounded studio quality Yeah From my point of view as a professional black man means absolutely nothing Oh But the fact that no, no, not the fact that he's Because if he was able to Leverage his radio network if he was able to put together a media package If he was able to start collaborating with other artists and building bridges, then I'll know that he's serious That's why I had to go but telling me is nothing and that's where I wish our women understood It's listen. I need you understand It wasn't like some little ray ray who worked at the gas station. No, he was he was science You know science is a tobin. You feel me? He had executive meetings. You feel me? He had meetings or a and r with his manager like I've seen the motion. He was they was talking about, you know, actually um, when you know, how, um OBJ is getting his salary and bitcoin That's how the way it was a couple years ago from musicians before before touring lines did, you know, so I man, it's not even about him making I know good music. I know music So it's like it's like was he was he somebody who it was just he had no team You can't do the media press Was he somebody who When he said he was going to do something he was going to get done Or was he somebody who if he felt like it if he was in the right mood state of mind, you know, it was an artist type shit Was he relying on his music when he came his art No, he worked on that all the time like that was off top But some creatives are only creatives. They're not businesses like they don't know how to be a good point No, in fact, and I had to learn that creativity isn't going to raise children and it sucks because That's why you need a team No, my point is and this is because I was I told him what to do But he didn't do it and that's why I had to go. This is the bigger picture for me You know just from a biological standpoint, especially when we're looking at it in our community the mortality rate of pregnant black women is high When you choose to have somebody's child You're essentially saying to god the universe and in your community that I'm willing to risk death To clone this nigga right to create another him, right? But what I'm saying the black woman is You're not creating or recreating the type of men you claim you want to see That's the fact So my point is if you keep prioritizing these artists and these creatives Who the fuck are gonna leave the next generation artists and creatives? Oh, no, because my son's gonna be raised out I told you I'm not the right black woman to have these conversations because because everything you're saying I agree with You know I was with I was with my ex for two years And at two years I studied people, you know, I pay attention to people how to move like I say I gotta accept it or I'm not gonna accept it and I had to accept a lot of things But over time I noticed how parenting was, you know, how he moved with his son. I don't have any children I'm 31 with no children. That's like a unicorn in the world low-key So because I know exactly what you're saying. I'm not going not even just clone him I don't want to have the wrong person imprinting on my son or on my children Because your mind it gotta be my mind is too astronomical. I think about too It goes so fast. It's too much going on. My kids are probably going to be just like that because if I'm bored We we're chilling together. So what we about to talk about even at two one six months if If you just really just want to be a Come on. Yeah. Hey son and keep it pushing. You can't really be you. It's not gonna work either So it was certain things that I accepted and then over time like You can never be my husband and it sucks because as women like who to who are we to say who's gonna be our husband But it's certain things we gotta know we gotta pay attention to it's like