 All I want you to take away from this video is what is the big fear we have when we procrastinate. It's that I won't do what's required So let me ask you what is your biggest fear in terms of your life in terms of the things you want to accomplish It's a big question and many people have answered in different ways. I have an answer It's my own answer. Maybe it's the wrong answer, but it's an answer that I have found to be very very effective and insightful insightful and useful so This question is about the fear that we have When we are delaying things and avoiding and not fulfilling our potential and what's the real fear that's holding us back So again, it's about procrastination and it's this one starts off It says I've been working on my feelings and thoughts about my productivity for a while now this person has watched a few a few of my past videos where I talk about the importance of Looking at your intention and doing some inner work and journaling and trying to figure out what's going on underneath the underneath surface But I've come to a block and I need to I need help understanding it I've heard a lot of people talk about how procrastination is caused by the fear of failure people do talk about that And it is a fear But uh, we'll read on here before I say any more However, I think I've come to terms with the prospect of failure I mean, I think I'd be okay with it so long as I was able to give my all And I agree with that. I agree with that a hundred percent However, I feel I'm not giving my all and this leaves me feeling so bad inside It's affecting my confidence and I usually feel regret and disappointment with myself at the end of each day So there's the guilt and shame There's the main drivers of this If it's not the fear of failure, what is What is it that's holding me back? So what is it? So Again, it's not the fear of failure Most people acknowledge as this person here has and I'm so glad to see that You're doing the inner work on this because it It will mean that you're just going to blast through this issue very very quickly because that's all it needs is acknowledgement And it needs the insight that you are totally capable of getting and it's so great that you're reaching out and You're reaching out to me and maybe you're asking other people about this. I hope so Acknowledge this issue when you get through it But it's not the fear of failure because I'll tell you why this is the question I always ask people To highlight what the big fear is Think of that goal you're working on Now imagine if I could wave a magic wand and it could mean that now I can guarantee you magically somehow That you are now going to take all the action required for you to achieve your absolute potential in this Now I'm not guaranteeing you when I wave the magic wand That you will be successful But I will guarantee you that you will do your absolute best and achieve your Personal potential in this thing that you're interested in Most people say when I when I asked them that to say yep sign me up for that I really wouldn't care all that much Or maybe I'd I'd care a little bit But at least I'd feel totally good about myself because I know I've reached my own potential Now what does that point to that tells us what is the big fear? It's not failure. The big fear is that I won't do what's required I feel insecure and I feel afraid that I won't have the resources or I sabotage myself Or I'll just put it off and I'll delay it and I'll avoid it We don't trust ourselves to engage and to fulfill our potential So your biggest fear is that you won't do what's required Now what happens then because that fear is there When that need to take action comes closer and closer and closer and that fear is there Anxiety anxiety starts to gradually build the closer we get to taking action Maybe you're nodding your head and thinking yeah, I can recognize that that makes sense for me Procrastination which is to say look, I'll do it later. I'll do it later. I'll do it later Is just a way for us to relax because of that anxiety now it doesn't work And if we keep engaging in the procrastination Well later on down the line at some point all that fear and anxiety will come up again just bigger So it just delays the anxiety it never actually ends the anxiety What I'm interested in doing here with with people I'm working on with and on procrastination is helping people End the root cause of the anxiety Okay procrastination the problem with procrastination is it works It does allow us to a lay feeling of anxiety. Well, look I can do it later But fortunately it builds up a lot of indecision indecisiveness and it doesn't help our self-esteem And later on it just means the anxiety is going to come back in a bigger form What I tell people is to use the fear that you have so now that you know what the fear is I won't do it Now you can actually use that and leverage that fear into propelling you forward in your goal Instead of it holding you back So you're going to actually start to use this fear more You're going to start to take full conscious control of this fear and you're going to start using it for yourself Now people That go to a psychologist often the psychologist will get them to to talk about their fear and they'll do things like exposure therapy They're exposing them to the fear maybe gradually to the point where they're actually moving towards the thing that makes them afraid Okay. Now for us the thing is well Not doing the thing not engaging with it So what I tell people to do is take that fear and now you have control of it and amplify it Amplify that fear so that it is the consequence, but you have to control it rather than being a Reactive passive thing that just happens, which is what happens in procrastination That not doing it is just passively happening We don't feel like we're in control of it So amplify it not doing the thing is Now something you're going to control And by that all I basically mean here is If you notice you've procrastinated The fear is well now i'm going to remove myself from this for the rest of the day. It won't happen now I know i'm not going to do it now because i've procrastinated once and the consequence is That's my sign to remove myself from this goal now Okay, and now nothing is going to happen for the rest of the day on this But i'm going to decide that rather than in this pattern of delay Delay delay Okay Maybe several times every day Just remove yourself from it and say oh look i'll try again tomorrow But bring an awareness then that i'm using this fear because the next day you go back and if you're serious about that You will realize I either take action when I say I have to take action And you become more mindful of when you are going to start you give yourself plenty of relaxation time You start taking care of yourself self care becomes important positive rewards Non-negotiate non-negotiable fun is set into your calendar You start to realize I have complete control over this I determine When I engage and when I don't and what i'm going to put up with and what i'm not going to put up with What i'm enabling myself to do Self-sabotaging myself like this and what i'm not going to enable myself to do We're going we're almost like enabling ourselves with this pattern of procrastination so Use that fear all I want you to take away from this video is what is the big fear we have when we procrastinate? It's that I won't do what's required now that you know that how are you going to use it? How are you going to use that to drive yourself forward? That's a big big secret in procrastination and once you figure that out you won't do it anymore If you'd like to learn more about this Visit my website the resources are there for you to put this issue behind you entirely Or if you have just a question for me that you do you'd like feedback on you can contact me there as well Thanks so much for watching folks, and I'll see you again soon. Bye for now