 What's up, you guys? Let's talk about the number one thing that makes women lose interest. So I've been doing this for a while. My name's Lloyd. I'm a dating coach. I run this channel. I run a variety of different programs that help guys out. And what I've seen consistently is that when a guy has something going on with a girl that he likes, maybe they're texting a lot at first. They go on a nice date. It feels like it goes well, but slowly but surely, she starts responding less and less. Slowly but surely, it's more and more difficult to get around that second date or that third date or whatever it is. And then eventually you don't hear from her, okay? She goes to you. She lost interest. What happened there? Why at the beginning was she so interested in you? And then later on, she's not. Well, if this is happening to you consistently, like you have to look at what the common denominator is behind all of this. And if it's happening to you consistently, clearly the common denominator is you. So what can you do to help fix this? Well, this is something that used to happen in my life a lot and it happens with a lot of my clients that I help and this is something that is very solvable but it usually comes down to one thing or maybe there's some other things but the main thing is neediness. Being needy drives women away. I don't know if anything that drives women away faster than neediness, okay? They do not want a guy who needs them. They do not wanna date down, okay? They wanna date at their level or above. If you're needy, you're basically showing that. What I find guys who are needy, what they start doing is they start, maybe on the date they'll be incongruent and not realize it. Maybe they'll be trying really hard to impress her. They'll become overly sensitive. They'll be thinking about their text messages a lot. They'll be stressing about the date. They won't be able to properly have fun while they're on it. They won't be able to properly enjoy it which is why you're on the date in the first place to have fun with somebody. They become overly critical of themselves. They think too much, overly insecure. Those kinds of things, they're not confident. If you're experiencing neediness, those things are gonna come through. And what I've found is that when a guy is like, he's looking at an interaction and he really needs this to happen, really needs this to work to feel good about himself, it almost never does, okay? So what is the difference between a guy who is needy and a guy who's not needy? A lot of it's those things. So the way to get out of it is to become more reliant on yourself. So I'm gonna show you two examples. I'm gonna show you a client who when we first started was a very needy guy. He's improving, he's getting better over time. And I'll show you an example of a date that happened with me over the weekend which basically should show you how a non-needy person would act in that scenario and why it ended up working out. So let's talk about my client for instance. Let's just, let's call him Matt, okay? So Matt was going on dates with women or he would eventually or sometimes meet women that he likes. Sometimes he would scare him off at the beginning because he was being needy, but sometimes he would get women that was actually interested in him and then they would go on a date. And every single time through the date he was always wondering what's the right thing to do? How do I make this work? And he was very sensitive to what she was doing or whether she wasn't texting him back fast enough. And so every single time when the date ended they would almost always never text him back. And it was because every single time it was like I can prove myself, this has gotta happen and when she would maybe not sit close enough to him or maybe she wouldn't look at him correctly or maybe she wouldn't text him back fast enough after the date it ended, he would start panicking and he would start messing it up. He would send her to either too many text messages or he would send her something that was miscalibrated or weird or just completely ignore the situation and then something, then then send something that just sounded kind of like, yeah, weird. In this scenario, his neediness is driving women away. So let's talk about my version. And in this version, if Matt had been on this date he probably would have freaked out and ruined it. But I'll show you how I handled it. On this date, I go to this Mexican restaurant. It's actually quite a popular Mexican restaurant here in Austin. And we go, she shows up at around like eight. We order some tacos and the music is really loud and she's like complaining about it nonstop. She's not having a good time, I can tell. And so I'm like, hey, sorry about the music. Let's just eat our tacos really fast and we'll find some places a little better. So we eat our tacos really quickly and then we go someplace else. We talk for a little bit on the way and we go to this other bar. Now this other bar is usually kind of a loungy area and the music's not too loud usually but for some reason they had a DJ there. I guess it was Saturday or something like that. And the music's really loud and she is not happy again. She's complaining, she really doesn't like it. She says she can't hear herself think. And then eventually she decides, she says, hey, look, listen at 10.30, I'm gonna go meet up with my roommate. And now if you've heard your date complain at two of the places that you've taken her to and then afterwards she's going to meet up with her friend at 10.30 p.m. on a Saturday, you probably think that date's a bust. You probably think you messed up. You probably think that things are going really poorly, okay? Now admittedly they weren't going the best but because I'm a non-needy person, I don't respond that way. I'm like, all right, cool, well let's finish her drinks and then we'll go down. So we walk down and then I'm walking and I'm talking with her and then I turn and I look at her and I'm like, hey, well, while we're here, I'm enjoying talking to you. Listen, if you really gotta meet up with your friend, I totally understand but I'd love to spend more time with you. Like, I think you're really cool and but yeah, if you gotta go, no big deal. And she's like, she thinks about it. She's looking at me and she goes, yeah, I think I'm gonna go hang out with my roommate. I'm like, all right, no worries. Well, let me walk you to your car. So I walk her to her car, we're talking, we're kind of like joking with her for a little bit. And then as we get to her car, I look at her, she looks back at me and I'm like, all right, we'll have fun with your friend. And then I turn and I walk away. All right, didn't beg her to stay, didn't, well, oh, don't hang out with your friend. Didn't freak out, kept my cool, smiled, let her go. Now was I annoyed that she left? Yeah, I was a little annoyed. But at the end of the day, I'm relying on me, myself. I'm still a pretty badass dude even if she decides to like leave a date after two of the places are allowed. All right, I still got a pretty cool life. I still got things going on with me. I didn't need her to like me. And look, at the end of the day, if she decides to ditch me for that, she probably wasn't a good date to begin with. But you know what happened after that? At around 1 a.m., she texts me, hey, are you up? Or hey, are you still awake? She did the same thing, well, I wasn't awake. She did the same thing the next night. I also wasn't awake, okay? So now we're texting and we're probably gonna meet up sometime this week, okay? Not being needy in that scenario, not freaking out, not needing the date to work was the reason why she came back, all right? Now, if you had been like, if a needy person or my client, Matt, had been in that scenario, he probably would have freaked out and he probably would have ruined it, okay? But by me showing non-neediness, showing coolness, showing reliance on myself, that's what was the difference. So try and figure out ways that you can make yourself happy, even if you come home from a bad date. If you can still find a reason to smile, that's what's gonna make you a non-needy person, okay? And then I help clients construct this kind of life in their everyday lives. That's something that I'm working out with Matt right now. So if you want more information about that, I recommend you sign up for the mailing list, get access to one of my free trainings. I don't really have that many spots in my private one-on-one coaching, but if you wanna look at that, that's also an option as well for you too. Thanks a lot, you guys. Good luck out there.