 I've got bitten by a crack-headed a gig once in Brisbane Tell me about that. Oh, I was one from the barrier and there was a girl in front of me And this guy was like punching into us and you but you sort of stuck and then he was carrying on Like hitting us and stuff and everybody around it so she was wrapping him on the knuckles with the drumstick she caught and He thought it was me. So he bit me on the shoulder So I spent the whole concert thinking like what have I got now? Yeah, I need a tetanus shot Yeah, I enjoy this but also I'd enjoy not having you know, yeah, whatever he's got Yeah, which I assume is a lot and then he stole the drumstick from her It's like I'll probably feel bad about this one day But I don't now this specific podcast episode has some darker references About some life moments that may not be suitable for a younger audience And if you had some traumatic experiences yourself and are easily triggered then this episode may not be for you Good luck and have fun Welcome to the seven show. We have Haydn Douglas here all the way from Queensland He's a comedian. He thinks he is other people think he is too. He's here for French, but he's here to talk shit He's a metalhead. He likes tattoos and He doesn't have much hair on his head. That is true. So let's talk about it You know, well, let's talk about the hair. I think that's the most important thing. It's not a political statement. I have shitty jeans Yeah, yeah, so I'm not a skinhead. I'm just not blessed. Yes with any any growth up there Your hair is making me furious. It's getting there. It's a bit of a looking good man Yeah, it's all about it. The grow back is great, but the initial haircuts. I Don't know. I don't know if I need to I used to be Like one I shaved shaved one Because of rookie day one time at my footy club and The rookie day I was a rookie because I just changed clubs and traditionally we get hazed and one of the hazing's is Get a haircut. Okay, they gave me a good good haircut. So then I just shaved it all off Came home to the missus and I had my hat on passed out she was like It's under your hat take your hat off So do it took it off and she she'd herself and then her mom got a buzz cut and just And then she's like actually it looks good. Nice. So I was a 12 months that was a that was a vibe. Yeah This is the only vibe I got now. Yeah, I look like no means no Rogan Yeah, it's someone that you don't want to see behind you in a in an alleyway Yeah, yeah, so do you use public transport used a bus to get here. I did today Everybody move away from you generally I find that in general. Is that a good thing or a bad thing? Oh, I mean, I'm antisocial. So yeah Yeah, it's it's pretty good. Yeah antisocial, but you're a comedian. Yeah, that's not a social activity. True. Yeah, unless you're drinking Oh, yeah, yeah, that's that that then that leads to its own wealth of problems. Yeah Yeah, that it does. So how did you get into? the that scene I was in metal bands for years and Growing up, you don't really realize I'm also a bit spectromy. So if I don't make eye contact, that's why that's fine I was in bands for years and Was always funny come so you just sort of do that But realistically, you don't really think it's an option, especially I grew up in Queensland Then I moved over here and realized that there were There were open mics like there's ways to do it and Then I was like mentally ill which helps. That's kind of one of the key ingredients and Yeah, I had a nervous breakdown and saw Steve Hughes the day after I got out and was like I'm gonna try that one day and then I did and still doing it nine years later. Wow. Yeah, so you saw Steve Hughes? Yeah, cool. Yeah, that was that was the catalyst because I was a big big fan of his and At the time like my whole life had fallen apart got out of the psych ward saw him the next day I was like, I really want to try that and Just to prove to myself that I wasn't cooked Yeah, and yeah still doing it. Yeah. Yeah, so what what instruments did you play? Guitar and I was the singer in my band. Cool. So like thrash death metal sort of stuff Yeah, and was that a way to release your mental stress? I've always just been a creative widow and but yes It's the same as I'm just about to release a hip-hop album all those songs and it you'd be like this guy There's no way this guy's a comedian. They're so fucking dark, but that's kind of what I Don't know. That's where the funny comes from Yeah, and no one will just learns to be funny No, like you just you do it because you feel weird or you look weird. Yeah, your dad's a dick Oh, there's always some sort of reason for it. Yeah So what what brought you to like let's go back to before the mental breakdown Yeah, if we can talk about it. Yeah, it's beneficial for other people Yeah, I feel like they're gonna get through that sort of thing. Yeah, my friend murdered someone and then decided to tell me Which is um what? Yeah That's why I don't answer the phone kids as it could be a bad call just ignore it forever So yeah, it's a crate. That's actually what my show by Paula rock and roller is about largely is Not that so much but the impact that had but it's a very long story But the basically he's he was with a girl who was really depressed and wanted to end her life She asked him to do it. She'd asked what px's to do it. It was a it was a thing that For whatever reason was in her head and obviously the solution wasn't murder or death The solution was help, but that's the solution they went with and it's just a really it's a really sad story Because even the the homicide detectives when they were when I was helping them You were like, yeah, normally what we're all high-fiving after something like this, but no one wins in this one It's just sad But for whatever reason I was home that day and this is back in 2010 so it's on MSN just to date the story and I was you know, I was I was stone playing guitar and he's like, hey man I'm gonna tell you something, but you can't tell anyone I'm like, you know We're from central Queensland. So it's like he's banged a cousin. You know it happens statistically. It's gonna happen Yeah, I thought it would just be something silly that he was embarrassed of and yeah So then that just snowballed this weird chain of events where you're like, what do I do and Cuz no wants to dog their friends, but There's a line on the dog and your mates thing. Yeah murder tends to cross that line So it was like it was pre-meditated, but technically Yeah, she wanted it. Yeah, and we could prove Not we but that was proven but it with those sort of things it comes down to intent Yeah, the intent wasn't a like if I just flipped out and like Went full on Joey karate on everyone here and like you all died, but I didn't mean to kill you I wouldn't get as much time as he got for taking someone's life. Is that because of your bipolar? No, that's just the intent factor Yeah, yeah, maybe I could use the bipolar. Thanks, man. You're helping with my defense for your murder I This I got the footage So you're so your mate. Yeah, he's still locked up. Yeah, did he get 20? At the time was 15. Yeah, but who knows that's minimum who knows what happens Did you speak to him after he I speak he rings me. Yeah, and you're cool Yeah, he's the pur like so the breakdown side of it came from me not being able to forgive myself He's never been mad at me his family's never been mad at me It was just me that couldn't forgive me and was it because you could have stopped it or Did you feel like you could have stopped it? I mean if he'd called me a week earlier. Yeah But it was the I'm a pretty liberal guy like a comic and a muse. Oh, you know, I don't tend to rush towards police I didn't like helping them in prison someone. That's one of my best friends and love him like a brother Yeah, so just it's that like I couldn't get past that that feeling of like I've actually I Turned him in I did it. I didn't do it I I all I did was what needed to be done legally morally spiritually have we want to frame it But I knew all that logically but couldn't feel it. So how did that unfold after he told you? well that and that I was I Was stoned already that day then I I My housemate came home. He's like, would you like a pill? I was I never had one before will it make me feel better? So he gave me that then he's like would you like tab of acid? It's like I've never had that before will that make me feel better and I trusted his judgment No, I shouldn't have stopped believing in God that night But because he told me online I was reading 35 pages of detailed murder confession over and over and over on my first acid trip which Would not recommend. It's you know, generally you want to be looking at pretty colors and walking around a field Yes, but so then it was just like what do I do? What do I do called the cops? I was living here. This happened in Queensland. I Flu they asked me if I'd fly back and record tap phone calls and like yeah It's just this weird thing that within a space It was also the same week that my van got destroyed in a hail storm my aunt Jill died I got and I got noticed that I was gonna lose my house. So it was just like it was this awful time But oddly that shit led me here. Yeah today talking to you. Yeah, so I'm not happy about it But it's what what do you do? You can't change it. No, you can't so after that You went you spiraled down. Yeah, you can say that So and that was your own thing in your own head Yeah, yeah more or less. Well, I had bipolar and I knew that And it's always been there's always been issues around that but I hadn't been properly diagnosed or treated And then Coming I went over there help the cops. It's all over the news. Like it's just this whole for this whole thing and Then when I got back to Perth, I had no family here Everyone's over there and I just crumbled and I remember May 6th 2010 was when I went into a psych ward for the first time and I remember that because it's a day after my birthday And I needed to go in on my birthday But can you imagine getting like happy message like happy birthday messages from Greg from high school who haven't spoken to it 10 years your first day in the nut house like nah, she had a gray lens No, no, it was voluntary. So I went to D 20 at Charles Gardner. Wow. Yeah, and How does that process work when you're voluntary? You today because I've seen a lot of these movies where you check in and you end up on some random floor We have to wait for this platform to come down and get the scraps. Have you seen that movie? Yeah, that's cooked Well, this was not much apparently it's a lot better now But it was in the basement of the hospital, which is great because you're already feeling wonderful sounds amazing. Yeah You have to go to emergency and basically to go into a public hospital You have to be at the point where you're gonna neck yourself Which I was and then You You fuck around there. They assess you and then they take you in and you end up in a room like I don't know the size of an office With four to six other people just curtains separating you after that I ended up paying for private health care so I could get better treatment because the public system is is fucked Ben it's like my room flooded with sewage and then I got moved to another room and the floor was covered in piss and There was like aggression in there and I had I told the head psych like hey This guy's been aggressive if I see him threaten stuff or his patients again I'm gonna jump on his back and choke him unconscious and you can deal with him And he's like fair enough because I'm a model patient like they've never had shit out of me. I'm there to get well I'm not there to cause drama and then the next day I went out for a smoke came back And that guy's pinned on the ground getting the jab going to Greylands. So it's kind of like Yeah, if you're in a public hospital and you mess up and you're a risk to others Then you go to the naughty corner in Greylands. Yeah Absolutely my my wife used to work at Greylands in the cafeteria. Yeah, and she's got some stories. I'll bet. Yeah. Yeah That's another day. I don't know how much I could say But yeah, so when you were in there, how did they get you make you feel better? Oh Which time they didn't the first few shit. I'm just gonna have a quick sit So there's multiple times that you're in the in the psych ward about and you know The broken system What happened the first time you checked out like how how did you know or did you just get bored? You don't get an option in public hospital So the the weird thing is you've got private with mental health You got private hospitals and public hospitals a private a private hospital is like Almost incentivized to keep you there because they make so much money a public hospital is incentivized to get you out Because there's so many people coming in so you're really straddling this line of like No, neither one is perfect But I didn't have a choice. I just had to leave when they said I had to leave. Yeah, and I wasn't well I think out over the last 12 years. I spent 12 months in total in Nut houses, so it's weird to think that a tenth of the last 12 years has been in a hospital of some Yeah, and what was the last time you were in one? late 2021 And I was in that one for 17 weeks. Wow. Yeah, and that was because of like you just like with was it called when you're like remission? There's a bunch of factors like There's a thing called a repetitive transcranial magnetic stimulation. So back in the day they used to go straight to shock therapy Which is bad. It's inducing a grand mal seizure people have strokes and lady. I knew her heart stopped But now they have this thing where they put put a thing on your head They stimulate it with different magnetic frequencies and it helps open up neural pathways that That generally through some sort of sort of form. That's the word form of PTSD or whatever over the years Your brain has learnt to go from here to here and go that way all the time and sometimes those aren't They're not the best ways for the brain to go. You just practice what you know Yeah, so you get good at thinking bad and I had this This thing done and you have 30 sessions of it just kind of feels like a little woodpecker on the side of your head and You can drive home afterwards It's nothing like shock therapy and it changed my life That was the thing that after doing all the years of psychology all these groups all this shit None of it it never changed the feeling until I had that because there was something off in my head and So you were tapped and then untapped. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I was functional though Like it. Yeah, I was doing gigs wall planning to kill myself like that's It's it's weird and that's hard for people to understand but I was having good shows Wow, and Really good shows actually now I think about it. Yeah, but felt nothing inside So you then you start thinking what what am I what am I doing? Like why if this brings me to a joy? And I don't even care if they're having fun, but they are like why do my bother? Yeah, and yeah, I wasn't sure if I do comedy anymore. It was just just getting through every day was that enough of a challenge Yeah, so you you had a Therapy free 2022 No, I win in terms of what they're in terms of chickens yourself in oh, yeah, no, no, I'm good Yeah, I still it's like anything. It's like fitness. You've psychological fitness. You got to stay on top of it You've got a you got a it's it's all about understanding what how your brain works why it works that way and what what you can cope with what you can't cope with and Learning how to cope with the things you can cope with and address the things you can't so it's um It's a never-ending thing, but I like to talk about it I think my my friend show for instance could be a lot funnier if I didn't tell all those stories in the middle But I think it's important. Yeah, and I've got It's sort of up there. I'm thinking fuck should I've just done all the funnies like bang bang bang But this is what I want to talk about it's my life and and it does help people and that's that's that's nice Yeah, yeah, how close have you come to? Ending us ending your life. Oh Very close like 2021 my plan was too good and I won't say it on here because no But prior to that I was in the noose. Yeah, two thousand almost 11 years ago to the day So it's awesome to be here. Yeah, I'm really happy like yeah Could it could this could not exist I could not exist my family could be celebrating a sad anniversary Yeah, there's a quote. There's a quote that I that I've heard last year about it. It's a Permanent solution to a temporary problem. Absolutely. Yep, and I'm glad you're here. Thank you. Me too and But now it's What happens from here? Well, it's I don't even know how to describe it man It's like that my whole life was just this dark cloud over me at all times And I don't feel it anymore and it's actually scary to not have that dark cloud because it was always there So the it's the Waking up in the morning and not being miserable Tom Segura has a great bit about it where he's like do you ever wake up and just think Jesus Christ? How many days are there and that was my life from like the age of four? I'd put no probably about seven actually Until 2021 so you say back because that was my next question going back to your childhood. Yeah The age of seven is when you first started feeling that Depression and stuff. Yeah. Yeah, because I was yeah, but like, uh, I Got messed with a lot as a kid because I was a trusting kid and Yeah, like kids would just get me into dangerous situations like I'm trying to think of an innocuous one But they told me I loved ghostbusters and I love trains when I was four So somehow that came up at a playground and these kids told me there was one across the road So I'm like running across a busy intersection trying to find the ghostbusters train So that level of like innocence and and wanting to to believe people and believing that people were honest And then just sort of taking everything on board I think I first saw a therapist in grade two because I just it the it wasn't working right up there and Yeah, it's weird. Were you able to define that initial moment when it started happening? Uh No, not really No, well a few factors. There's yeah a bunch of things. I really couldn't pinpoint it What were your parents like and when you were that that young? Do you remember? Yeah, dad? very um Mom's beautiful person very supportive. I think the issue that I had with my dad is that he's the worst dad You could ask for and the best dad that you could ask for you just so which one was walking through the door See bipolar as well. He's definitely bipolar a borderline. I think borderline. It's been through a lot of abuse He's also had traumatic traumatic brain injuries And never treated because it's not his problem That you know, it's that that age bracket, you know, it's not my problem Blah blah blah. Do you just need to just listen to me my brains fucked, but it's not my problem. Yeah Wow, yeah, it's always some it's a deflection of responsibility. Yeah Yeah, and when you're like seven you had that first feeling of the dark cloud above you Yeah, a lot of it had to do with him for sure. Yeah If you can go back to your seven-year-old self, what would you tell him and What would you tell your dad? I Think it'd be easy to tell my seven-year-old self then tell anything to my dad. So I'll say that off the top My seven-year-old self I'd probably say, you know the way you Would Whether whether your dad says good things about you or bad things about you. They're just his opinions You need to work out how you feel about you and you need to not let people who say mean or hurtful things to you have any power Try to think of how my seven-year-old self would comprehend what I'd say with dad I guess What could you I mean, do you really I probably just say do you realize how much you're fucking up your son? right now and He would probably say fuck off who are you and then I'd say I'm your son from the future and you'd say bullshit and then we're getting a fight Is this still around yeah, yeah, when was the last time you talked to him? a couple of days ago like via text it's just um I Like I love my dad. I think back to my childhood He did so many things to make us have a like a good education and all this sort of stuff but because of that personality disorder that he's got going on it's like He would walk out of the room and come back a different person So it'd be I love you and proudie a blah blah blah and then it'd be you're a useless piece of shit five minutes later So he it's the funniest thing is he says about me. Where does Hayden get this bipolar from? It's like well, it's nature or nurture and you're both dickhead. So You think about it. I don't know what to tell you. Yeah Yeah, it's it's just strange. It was that constant dichotomy of like am I when you boil it down to like childhood thoughts Am I a good boy? Am I a bad boy? I don't know. Yeah, and it's you were told both all day every day and your disappointment and he's proud of you and Yeah, it's just reaching that point of I'm sure you probably have your experience with this too of like accepting that That's how they are. I can't change it if I want a relationship with them I'm gonna do it on these terms and if it's not on these terms. See you later Yeah, I've had very similar experiences like my my biological father. I didn't really know him Because we moved here from Russia when I was seven. Yep, and my mother met my stepdad and he I haven't spoken to him since before the pandemic and you step dad. Yeah, and You know, I'll boil it down to him being a bit bit narcissistic like he's got a job as a prison officer Okay, and he changed he got worse when he when he got that job. Yeah, because you'd bring his work home Like he wouldn't treat me as a prisoner But any time that I'd ask him something he'd be bothered. Yeah, and when you're growing up as a young young Young kid like adolescence as well, especially when I was a teenager We are still kind of vulnerable there where you're wanting some guidance on the on the path to manhood becoming an adult. Yeah, and I never got that No, and my mom carried as well. She carried hard and she taught me shit that Still to this day. I like reflect back on her because now she needs it. Yeah, which is good But there's a lot more flamboyance a lot of femininity in in my personality because it was more my mother Which isn't a bad thing. No But I had to learn the masculinity side of it, okay, and I can turn the masculinity on if I wanted to but It's more of a It's harder to do You know, do you find so sorry to cut off of just interested in that point So for me I found I didn't know how to process anger because of the environment. I grew up with anger was kind of Was that my role model was my dad So it was either it was either abuse or verbal abuse or physical abuse was his way of expressing anger Did you find that you didn't really know how to express anger when you were a teenager or were you in that sort of environment? I mean, I was really never abused in any way There was never him coming to me or telling me that I was a piece of shit or whatever There was just no role model in my life at that point. I had my own role models I had the boys from blink 182. Yeah, you know, they they I got their humor the humor from them Yeah, the comedians are like Jim Carrey and and Robin Williams and and you know, I'm not I don't consider myself a comedian But people think I'm funny which is cool But yeah, the people that I looked up to were in the music. Yeah, which is what I was saying. Yeah but yeah, I I don't think I don't think My the way I process anger back then was through footy and Through video games. Yeah, I got on to Call of Duty and I'd say everything under the sun fucking this and shit that and And things that are not appropriate anymore. Oh, I know what you mean I like Call of Duty 20 2007 lobbies were fucking filth. Oh, yeah, like we were doing We were saying shit right now that I don't know if you've heard of this But like a couple months ago they announced that they've they've recorded they have all the lobby Chats recorded from like from decades ago, and I'm like, I'm fucked It's like if you're like if you're like sacred group chat Um gets leaked you're fucked. Yeah, but like we need we need that's that's how I express my My anger and my anger wasn't really on anyone. It was just a I don't know. It's just like a release Was it more of like an like a frustration? Yeah, yeah frustration like I get really frustrated Of inanimate objects or when things are just not working for no reason Um, I can give you daily examples of this shit like yesterday I wanted to watch LeBron James hit his uh milestone, you know overtake Kareem. Yeah And I couldn't find a stream Okay fair enough and then I went to the NBA itself. I was like, I wonder if they've got a seven day trial They did I was like you beauty. I'll just get the fucking seven day trial and cancel it after this game got it Put my car details in put a little notification saying cancel this in like three days. So don't forget Put the game on and I can only hear it It's all blacked out can't see it. Okay, and I'm like, what the fuck That shit frustrates me like just those little things, but they stack up Do you think that's like you being a kind person and not wanting to take frustration out on people? So you pick those moments to let it out. Yeah. Oh man. I get frustrated at people like ask Ryan how frustrated I get I get frustrated at him, but like these moments that come to me with people Like for example work the what do I do for work? I never really thought I'd be doing it by consulting people with marketing and shit But the people I have to deal with who are just stupid Yeah, like I would I would send an email to someone and I'll be like, hey um Here is my offer It's a minimum of six months And they come back to me saying yep, we'd like to take this offer. We'd like to do a one month trial Now I have to read a five set to them saying hey as per the last email You're a fucking idiot. The as per the last email says you're a fucking idiot without saying it so that's So that's you know, I I don't do meditation. Maybe I should But I get up every morning and it's a reset. Yeah, I don't have depression. I don't know what it is I can't say, you know Apparently like another article I read last year. Apparently they've disproven Chemical depression. There's no such thing. Um, it's all a situational thing I read that and I agreed with part of it. Yeah and disagreed with part of it. Yeah, um But for me, I can't say shit on that because I've only observed what depression Is not like for me. Yeah, like I have a fucking bad day I get overwhelmed and I I get I've had a couple breakdowns before And those breakdowns are just feelings of overwhelming and I'm like fuck this shit I'm just going to sit there and do nothing. Yeah, but then the next morning it doesn't carry over Yeah, see that I couldn't see that's I'm blessed. I'm I'm I'm stoked with that But I think it's because something it's to do with my memory as well But I've got a good long-term memory Things that I remember you people will how the fuck do you remember that? Yeah, but there's short-term memory That I don't have and they're like Fuck is who what's his name again? You know? Yeah, um But like there's it in the moments and I think there's some sort of adhd or add or something involved in that I don't want to get diagnosed. I don't think I need to but like I just forget shit And then later on I'm like, oh, yeah, I was supposed to do that. Oh, it's not a problem anymore That does have benefits. It does have benefits if you've got the shits and you forget about it. Yeah. Yeah I get the shits, but then I forget I have the shits and I don't have the shits Fuck that's awesome. Yeah, it's like the most positive dementia. Yeah That's me. I was like fuck. So have you so angry yesterday? I was like, I don't even remember what I was angry about You know, um, but but I've I think because because when I was younger I would carry that over Yeah, but it was a it was a sense of reflection that I learned about The Socratic method is what I learned about which is huge value Because then you ask yourself, okay, why am I angry? Is this in my control right now? Can I do something about it right now? No, I cannot Should I still be angry the fact that I don't have control over it? No problem solved for now Yeah, move on, you know something and yeah, but The only time that it frustrates me on going is if I have something that I need to achieve But it's no longer in my control the ball's not in my court and I'm waiting for someone else It's incubating in someone else's court and they're just fucking around with it. I'm just like you're a moron But when you find someone that gets it that just that just gets on with it and understands and just like yes But everybody has their own journey. Everyone has their own life So at the end of the day, I just want to kind of just almost do it all myself Yep, and if I have to delegate I will So, yeah Yeah, I know what you mean and there's no greater feeling like for anyone that's wanting to To be a broadcast or a comic amuse. Oh There's no greater feeling than looking in your bank and seeing money that you've earned just through being you Yes, it's not it's not a degree. I have it's nothing and I've still got a day job I it's a good job, but I hate it. I'm not built for that. Yeah, all I want to do is stand up and music I'm a receptionist. Wow. I work at a hotel and my official job title is is receptionist Which is hilarious if you've ever seen me. You wear a suit. Yeah, I wear like the button up and all that. Yeah, it's amazing It's pretty funny That's so before that. I was a security guard at the airport, which makes more sense. That's better. Yeah My comic the other day said I have resting bouncer face and I was like, yeah, that's that's pretty spot Resting bouncer face. It's great. Yeah, show me your resting bouncer face You know, and that's how I walk around the streets. Just last time I was in Perth I have that face when I'm walking around Northbridge at night because I just want people to leave me alone Yeah, and some guy came up and said, hey, you got any gear and I thought oh no, I've lent too far into this face I'm attracting what I hate Oh You know, you know, we should do you should like carry around like pouches of protein powder Or some creatine samples and just give it to them. Yeah, that'd be funny Fuck or carry your fucking Fringe show tickets and be like, yeah Yeah, put it in with powder so they have to dig through it I don't what do I want meth heads at my show for? Just numbers, I guess. Yeah, true. I am needy and desperate. That's why I do this. That's a good put any meth heads Please come to my show You get free protein powder Protein powder. That's it. That's if I had any other powder. I'm not sharing it, you know Yeah, yeah, yeah, and that's fair enough. Yeah So, um, yeah, so bouncer receptionist comedian. I've done all sorts of stuff, man. My polar. How do you 37 nice good innings getting old. Yeah. Yeah feeling there getting there and Do you have any kind of goals that you that you want to achieve in the next 12 months to five years? I'm going to the us for a tour later this year. So cool to that. Yeah doing a lot of weird places A lot of the places in the Midwest. So we're doing like North Dakota, South Dakota, Illinois Iowa, Missouri Kentucky, like we're doing a lot of rednecky places, which I'm really excited about Because I just want to see it your look as well. It's like I need to see it I watched the news. I know who they voted for Like my friend that I'm touring with did a show They had a make america great again banner beside the stage To a life-size donald trump and the wife milania. That's the name and then the confederation flag. I'm guessing. Yeah And he's he's uh, he's from texas, but he's a democrat. He's very much not that side of the fence And he's like dude. I'm doing a show here. You're gonna fucking Had the weirdest time over here. Yeah, and then they sent me a footage the other day of a show They were doing where they had to clear snow Because it's you know freezing cold and they had a flamethrower Clearing the snow at the front of the venue flame thrower. Yeah Like one of those elon musk ones. What the fuck and then afterwards the Doing promo shots with machine guns. I'm like this is I've been to 16 countries. It's the first time i'm scared Southwesters fuck. Oh, yeah, he travels. He's a comic travels with a loaded pistol in the glovebox Of course, and he's ex navy and it's like why does why does that guy need a pistol? It's like he's like because i'm in america and I don't trust them Yeah, that's crazy. So anytime I think of america and the southwest and you know traveling around I just think of the the latest borat. Um, yeah one where he did that through that throughout the covid thing. Yeah That was fucking hilarious Yeah, i'm i'm i'm scared To go to the land of the free and the home of the brave like you gotta be brave to go there Yeah, it's it's it's a movie out there. Yeah, it is the wild west And I I mean I go I used to go to america all the time like at least once a year to a point and uh, I took my my girlfriend at the time there, which I proposed to yeah my wife um 2019 october Okay, I proposed to her in new york new york's great. Like it's so vibrant so many different people If there's a place I could go to frequently it'd be new york And do my interviews there because i've seen some cool shit there. Yeah. Yeah Go over to the west to cali cali's cool. You know, they're they're pretty they're pretty hipster there and The whole of california reminds me of just free mantle, but with obnoxious accents And uh, a little bit less I can see that. Yeah a little bit less on the skin, which is cool Um, but anywhere in between I haven't really visited much. I've never been to texas Apart from like a stopover in houston airport um, and I've never been to those southwest country Uh, uh states Okay, I want to but at the same time I also do not because they're crazy, man Yeah, the thing i'm looking forward to the most is the um, no azark experience Someone's built a quote unquote life size no azark Where they show you how the dinosaurs were on there and the earth's 10 000 years old and I just I have to see that Yeah, that's going to be hilarious Someone I know I can't mention who it is but they went there And and they're they're a bit older as well in the 60s. Oh, no, they went there about 10 15 years ago and they would see the Morbidly obese people on those electric scooters And he took photos of them like a tourist like oh my god. I've never seen that before Oh, there's another one. Oh, there's another one That might be enough to make me believe dinosaurs were on the ark Well, if it's got that load bearing capacity and like obviously For for saving myself and not being canceled. Um, you know, it was that was him that was him They just told me the story and he made it up. I heard I thought it was interesting. Yeah allegedly allegedly So, um, everything is safe after you say the word allegedly. Yeah I hope you get there and It's actually just like a nature conservation and I've literally got two of every animal And everyone's just like super forward-thinking just it's there for preservation And what happens if one of the animals gets freaky with the other animal and gets pregnant like They can't get rid of it because it's america. Yeah, they send it over here to our arc like oh, no, no, no, no They'll just uh Preparate like god's law like yeah, look, this is nature. Put a hat on it and say it's a different animal Yeah, absolutely. Like I I really I hope they I hope they do better soon Well, I used to be in one of those speaking in tongues churches like the scott morrison Pentecostal churches when I was a teen as well. There's a lot going on There's a weird guy Um, I wouldn't recommend that either. I I've seen so many documentaries in in the states about the states and all different aspects like that Uh, forget his name. Um The one with the glasses he was famous recently through that one. Yeah, the jiggle jiggle. Yeah jiggle jiggle I've watched uh, I found all these episodes on netflix About all the different shit that happens in america like the porn scene the rap scene the gangster scene All that shit. I feel like I would love to do that sort of stuff Yeah, because that that would be cool, you know, um, I think you'd be good at that I just need I just need kevlar and a helmet at all times. Yeah, especially me with a big target Yeah, she knew a lot of kevlar. Yeah, but like the ones about the uh, the the free speech Um, Nazi. Oh my god with the with the two girls that they've got singing the songs Fuck me. That's wild. I would just go there not to just film but just to like It's it's it's real life. Like it's I don't know I don't think they know how much other countries laugh at them And just go oh look america's talking. Let's let's let's Yeah, you know, but there's so many americans that I admire respect and there's a lot of friends And you know, it's not Unfortunately, they are labeled as a whole. Yeah, there's so many good people that live there too and they're they're also they're They're inside of it going. What the fuck? I this I'm so embarrassed about this, you know So um, and you know, I've got a friend. He lives in fort lauderdale Um over in um florida of all places, you know, and yeah, I went to florida And then went and went down to miami miami is all right for like Yeah, it's I'm looking forward to the movies just feel like documentaries now Like like seriously, they've they're really picked up on it but um, yeah, I reckon I reckon I'm definitely due back there um soon don't know why but I just I think I I want to go there now not as a tourist but an observer of the people Yeah, which is technically a tourist anyway, but yeah, it's a zoo It is my Australia is the same. Yeah, like I drove past people when I was about 16 17 I drove past people having a kkk meeting in the full hoods in central Queensland in the Queensland Jesus Queensland's a hot bed of racism. It's yes. It was a is it towns townsworths townsville townsville town No Tamworth, but they have the music festival. Yeah, apparently apparently that's super. Oh, I can only imagine. Yeah I'm from the beef capital of Australia. So, you know, a lot of beef farmers Uh, yeah, as you can imagine not the most progressive place and uh But yeah, it's one of those things where I think were they were they just playing ghosts like it's such a strange Strange thing to see on a Tuesday night. And I know I often think did I have I invented that but my sister and cousin were with me And uh, yeah, it was crazy So you're going on tour And how did you land that by the way? Oh, strangely, you you probably be interested in this actually through virtual reality So during the pandemic we started a comedy club in VR It's a platform that's since closed, but it's called old space Everybody looks kind of like a nintendo wee character The difference between it as a performer and an audience member actually and like a zoom gig is that When you're as an audience member when you look left There's someone in the crowd next to you when you look right there's someone there They feel collectively part of the crowd cool as a comic you can look left look right you can do crowd work You either hear them laugh or if they're mics off they send emojis flying up into the air So I met all these acts Um music producers all these random people in there because we're all stuck inside Um, I wanted to keep doing shows the audiences were all in america. So we were doing These shows in our morning for american night time And I've just ended up with connections in canada and america through that Wow, and then you're you're you're getting flown over I've got to pay my flights, but it's guaranteed transport between shows accommodation Guaranteed pay Yeah So is there like a sponsor behind that or just booking agents that I've met other comics and their bookers and yeah Wow, I need to get a booking agent Yes, I need a bet. I need one here shout out to sentry hook your boy up. Yeah. Yeah. So, um, so you've got that going on And you obviously got fringe here. Yeah, so welcome back to perth. Thank you, sir. And you're a receptionist. I am. Yeah Where do you see yourself at 47? Hopefully alive. Yes, which I never thought I'd say at 27. Yeah, um My short term like within the next five years is pay my mortgage Which is getting there it should be paid in the next two or three years buy a caravan Live on the road just driving between shows And then the rest of the year is either in in europe or the states canada Doing shows and then just sort of the nomad life. I don't have kids Um, I don't know that that's going to happen for me Because I have worked as a special needs carer and in child care and all that over the years as well I understand what it takes to raise kids and unless I'm going to do it properly I'm never going to do it. Yeah, you got to find someone that you're willing to have kids with Yeah, alone kids and it's the They're working with kids. I realize how many lives could be changed with and I love you in a sandwich in the morning and um Also given my Given my head issues the likelihood of my kid having them is pretty high so At least I won't be causing the environmental issues like my dad or whatever did and hopefully they don't have any murders in their lives um, but I I care too much to to to fuck it up my sister. I see what she does with my nieces and I'm like, hey if I don't have kids That's fine. I've got them. They're they're the best So it's just I just want to keep doing what I'm doing um Get make my act better to a more And get to a point where I can live entirely off of what I create Yeah, okay, and stay happy and grateful Stay happy and grateful. That is good. That is good and um What's something else in your life that you do that's you know, that kind of distracts you music music Yeah, so I've been releasing music since 2005. I think was our first EP in my band um, and that's Like I know you so you say you don't meditate you said that earlier. Um Do you have things that are meditative? So like for me archery is meditative. There's no room for anything except the task. Yes editing creating music Is the same for me. Yeah editing is one. Um, I I play guitar for over 15 years So there's that but I'd really pick it up at the moment because I'm lazy. Um That's um for me like I can't wait to go back to snowboarding snowboarding is one of them Yep, I want to do that more often I want to do that in the summer here because it's winter there And then in the winter here because it's like New Zealand or something And yeah, I want to do that three four times a year. That's my that's my like goal and I used to play video games. That was a good one but then everybody's just too fucking good on there anymore and I play to win and if I if I wanted to play I play properly and then all of a sudden I'm I'm an e-gamer. I don't want to be an e-gamer I want to be a casual gamer that just chops No such thing unless you're like some freak, but you may as well make money and be an e-gamer, you know, that's how it works Yeah, you're either good at something you're either Good at something naturally and eventually you just become a professional and then It's not as fun anymore Or you do it casually and you go, oh, I don't know. What's the point? Yeah, you know um, but yeah each their own um but yeah, the music gig the music gig I remember 20 I think it's 2007 as well around about the same time caller duty four came out one warfare the original greatest cable all time and guitar hero Guitar hero three okay came out and that's where I learned a lot about music really. Yeah, I could never play it Yeah, I was I was a god I was playing fucking through a fire and flames on expert and everything Because I knew how to play a lot of the songs on guitar. Yeah, and it just fried my brain I could never not get my head around I I transition to guitar Because of that game. Okay, so I was like, oh, I actually would like to play guitar now Yeah, the post Malone same story except I didn't go down the uh superstar fame and tattoos on my head Um, give it time. Yeah keen to see him on sunday. That's gonna be a sick gig. Oh, yeah Is that it's still not happened here? No. Oh cool. No, it's happening and god I had I wish I had a postie on the show. That'd be sick But um, yeah, they're coming. They're coming. Is that with the chili willies chili willies. Yeah, actually funny story last year. We're in europe Visiting my wife's family. She's dutch. So we're in the Netherlands and we uh before the trip as well We realized that the red hot chili peppers were going to be in paris. Okay at the same time So we did like a mid trip Uh detour to paris for three days So we stayed in paris for a bit and then we went to st. Dennis, which is a fucking hole Um, but that's where the stadium is. Okay And uh, yeah, we went to see the chili peppers. Anderson pack was there. Okay. Um wonder cat was playing Um, and then yeah, but uh weird bill. Was it a festival? No, it was just okay Yeah, just two two acts and then the headliners so but I was stoked to see anderson because i'm a big fan and uh But yeah the whole time because the french are like all chain smokers a yeah I felt like I needed to get some chemo afterwards because I definitely got cancer. Yeah, that's um The funniest part was we were in the crowd waiting for the chilies to to go up And the chili tickets were announced that same day in australia for for this coming weekend So we booked I got my phone out and booked tickets to the same people that we're about to see Back home in australia. That's great. It was a it was a unique kind of like You know, you're a fan. Yeah, um, but we got golden circle tickets this time because the last two times Oh, I've seen them three times one was a big day out the first time I saw them Um, and that was way at the back and then the last two times were like, you know, they have the two sections now So there's no crowd crush, which is good. Um, right now. I'm like no I want golden circle I'm I'm here to I'm here to potentially hurt people accidentally And potentially be hurt by someone else accidentally. Maybe not accidentally. Who knows how it goes? Maybe they play your favorite song. Oh, mosh pits, man. I love mosh pits. I was born for them. Oh, yeah I'm I'm undefeated. Yeah all time How's your toe going there serve? Yeah, my toe is fucking black. I've got socks on but You like the guy in the uh in the ufc that's allowed to take steroids in the mosh pit environment Yeah, yeah, yeah, I see you walking towards the mosh pit and I'm like for fuck's sake Really, I'm gonna end up behind him. Yeah. Yeah, but we're doing circle pits and shit and uh, I mean My favorite my favorite time is the wall of death. Um, that's good fun. Pierce the veil sound wave. I think it was 2012 and I was like, oh, what's this? Everyone's Spread out Oh, were you not informed of the wall of death? No, but I knew about it But I was like, oh fuck, but I was a bit nervous. I was like All right, is this where is this it? Is this where I die? Yeah, and I was at the front and We're waiting for the drop And I saw it see this guy across from me And we just start charging at each other and then the last last second he realizes he fucked up And I just went, you know a little bit of a shoulder and through through the crowd He lived he lived, um, but it lives in our memories. Yeah. Yeah, it lives in our memories But um, you get those other mosh pits where you get these like weird Um, hardcore bands or the fight dancing. Yeah. Oh the fight dancing man. I don't get it I don't get it either. I just love their fun to watch. Yeah. Why are you here? Yeah To the gym. Hey, those those are the ones that needed to Um, express their anger through you know pumping iron or Playing call the duty. Yeah, not spin kicking strangers in the head. No during a breakdown Yeah, or or no, actually funny times is when um, there are people that are unaware of them And they decide to walk through the void That you just see this dressed up emo looking girl With pink hair. It's always them. Yeah, like makeup drooping down the cheeks You know one of those ones got gothic emo sort of chicks And she's just like looking for a friend and like looking around and then bang foot to the face You're just like, yeah, I love the guy that's um Just shithamored in the middle of the wall of death. Yes, and he hasn't noticed anyone part. He's just standing there And then you just see Boos like moses close in the river. They call it the bait. Yeah, they call it the bait in a mosh pit I remember what it was reading some forums back in the day when I was getting into festivals I was like, I'm gonna research this just in case And yeah, someone wrote a whole like essay about different types of pits Circle pit mosh pit death pit wall of death all this shit some other shit. And I'm just like fuck I remember I saw saw this photo of Of this back someone's back and it had slayer Like etched out in blood in blood And I was like, fuck imagine going to a slayer concert Like if you got a slayer, do you die? That was the misconception that I did that I had and then when I went to a slayer concert But it was but it was in Australia I was like, I can imagine slayer in the prime in America would have been fucked Like you're there. I've got a story, but yeah So I went to the slayer and it was sick and then I I love I love crowdsurfing because I was like, I wonder if I can crowdsurf being 610 There's a lot more volume of me to grab on and it was it was dope But I crowdsurfed a slayer raining blood I remember that moment because I had the Just before iPhones all came out. I had one of those point and shoot cameras I got to find the footage. It's like two megapixel potato quality, but I was just like But yeah, tell me about your slayer story. So it's it's not it's not my story But it's my friend. So my friend that got me into metal saw slayer and I think it was 2000 at festival hall in brisbane. Yep and It was like what you describe as an American And he's been to he's been to whatever but he said when they started The a bunch of dudes ripped the chairs out from the balcony and threw them over And there were people diving from the balcony into the into the crowd And there was two guys that came after work in full suits and he saw them afterwards and they were just torn to shreds Um, I've got bitten by a crack-headed gig once in brisbane Tell me about that I was one from the barrier and there was a girl in front of me And this guy was like punching into us and you but you sort of stuck And then he was carrying on Like hitting us and stuff and everybody around it. So she was rapping him on the knuckles with the drumstick. She caught And um, he thought it was me. So he bit me on the shoulder So I spent the whole concert thinking like what have I got now? Yeah, I need a tetanus shot. Yeah, I enjoy this but also I'd enjoy not having You know, yeah, whatever he's got. Yeah, which I assume is a lot And then he stole the drumstick from her and was like, I'll probably feel bad about this one day But I don't now just with those eyes and what Oh man, I remember um, figuring out where the optimal drumstick zone would be And I would have my zone would be much wider Yeah Because as soon as I see it up in the air Because I played footy. I'm like taking a mark taking a screamer off someone. I've taken some specky's a But like sometimes sometimes if it land In front in like a few people in front of me But because it's got forward momentum it kind of bounces Someone's head or something went bang and then blop And then like I remember someone else where it like slipped through their fingers and I got it And they looked at me like like for a split second like I touch but I touched it Like in there I can see it in their eyes like they're gonna ask me like but I touched it I'm like but I fucking got it But my favorite favorite ones was when there's two people that grab it clean Oh, yeah And they try to and that's always always someone that has it with two hands and someone else has it with one in the middle I'm like, it's either gonna snap or you just gotta just gotta go for it Yeah, just gotta go MMA on there on that shit get them to tap out. Yeah, but um, yeah, that that's some wild shit But I've got like a good 10 drumsticks I had um, I think it was southbound. It was like early set on like the second day This is like ballpark music. So it's like a chill like chill band and uh, my mate was standing in front of me He's like maybe five foot nine. I'm six two for reference I just see like this drumstick just comes straight towards us and pin him square in the face And he starts pissing out blood and the girl next one just goes. Hey a drumstick. Whoo Fuck and then when they're like frisbee, um picks Like I remember one one of my first ever picks I collected The the the guitarist like flicked it and like no one else noticed I've seen that and I was like I was like So I'm like if I can swim in through the crowd Actually, it's like this I'm like above them and then I get to the spot where I reckon it is and there it is I'm like, oh Yeah, and they're like, what the fuck have you ever got one of someone's shoulder? I have no I'm like, where'd that go and then I see it on their shoulder in front of me And there's some chick and then you and then she you assaulted me Pet peeve at festivals go people who film the whole fucking thing Yes, just watch it They have a dvd. Watch that when you get home a quick clip. It's fine. Oh, I'm getting fired up a quick clip Go nuts photo go nuts. Like if you're doing like, hey man, wish you were here Awesome. We all wish someone was there. Yes. We all wish a lot of them would leave too. Yes But uh, if you're they film the whole fucking thing. Yeah, what I don't get it And I've done that where I've filmed a clip of a song and then watched it back and realized that It ruined it for me because I was so into the vibe that when I watched it back I realized the guitarist was playing poly It was singing was shit singing was shit And if I hadn't taken that little clip, I would have deluded myself through the atmosphere Yeah, I don't I don't film shit anymore except for like One moment just to just to go back to yeah That was that time to it's like a ticket to to a memory otherwise forgotten So yeah, I did that and but like yesterday for going back to the LeBron James game There's a photo of the moment he took the shot And all around everyone's got their phone And there's one guy caught side sitting right next to LeBron's two sons They've got their phone out as well and he's just just sitting there casually just enjoying the moment like the guy is watching it He's actually there. Yeah. Yeah, and and I I I didn't have my phone. I had my phone on me And I recorded the first bit of like the start of the game and a little top of the corner LeBron 36 points I was like, all right, it's go time and then the rest of it. I was just watching it There was a there was a moment where um, josh giddy because he's Australian he elbowed LeBron accidentally in the first quarter and it looked pretty bad I got I filmed that but then two points to go. I'm like I'm watching it I'm watching this like in person in person live on the tv But it's as good as I could get and then I was like, oh, I did it And then everyone else had their phones out and shit and it's so and then now on tiktok All I'm seeing is just people recording the moment on the tv Like I mean fair enough. I used to do that But now I'm like, what's the point because I'm the same. I look back at these videos And like red or chilli peppers the current tour, right? I'm seeing a few um clips on tiktok And then people are just complaining about like how anthony isn't sounding the same Or how he's playing guitar or john's playing guitar poorly. I'm like, dude Do you realize the studio is so much different to live? And your phone a microphone is not fucking quality. Don't fuck. She's so bad Yeah, so and yeah, I'm My cardio terrible right now We went to ryan and I went to um, uh off spring last year Is that christmas party? Some 41 was good, but I wish I did not spend any energy at some 41 because by the time off spring came out I was fuck were they good because the live footage of scene of the off spring is still pretty good They were great. They were amazing and and some 41 still slapped as well um, but my cardio it was like First 20 seconds, you're like, fuck. Yeah, I love this song. Yeah I'm gonna die and then and then you would like stop and you're like All right last chorus of the song. I'm going all out and then for 10 seconds max You're good and then you're fucked again Um, the older I get the more that mosh pit smell Bones me and when you feel him like oh man, I'm unfit. I need to get out of here and you can smell 400 sweaty dudes around you. It's unpleasant. Yeah, but you love it Yeah, pay your ticket to be in that spot And then you see all these teeny boppers. You're like, what the fuck are you here? And then you ask them and then they're like, oh my parents my parents grew me up on this music. I was like That's good respect. I love that. Yeah respect. I mean I'm 32 So I could easily have a kid that's 10 at least by now And they would be fucking singing zepp zeppelin Zeppelin songs and a bit of linen skinned, you know a bit of the decent music because right now I don't have anything that's come out. I I've got this, uh, gig. I'm doing, uh, some Influencer shit on sunday at laneway festival. Okay, never been to laneway And I had a look at the the acts No fucking clue they are so do you have to research a little bit? Oh, that sucks. I hated doing that when I was in radio Oh, but um, yeah, it's it's an interesting one and it's going to be an interesting day Because sunday is ufc at the start and then middle of the day until five is Um laneway and then from from five afters posty and red hot chili peppers. That's a big So, yeah, I'm not I don't I didn't secure it to get to the ufc. So I don't get here Fuck them But uh, yeah, it was meant to be like a chill day chill sunday and now I'm just like fuck What am I gonna do even like old mate logan paul and ksi are in town like it's a big weekend Yeah, wow because because prime is the there is no affiliation. Fuck prime. It's just another drink You know sparkling water shoutouts to coca-cola that I think is shit anyway Mount franklin is my favorite mountain though if they want to sponsor me. Yeah happy to go there Yeah, and I don't mind the franklin too Does mount franklin exist? Is it a real place? Let's have a look. Let's go. Let's go and research make a doco about it That being said which are definitely Like buy and hoard that prime shit and sell it send us to the uk because those kids are absolutely insane. Correct. Correct So, yeah, so, you know midvale is yeah right next to midland They're having a drop at 6 30 on saturday Of the drip and this this podcast will be live well after that. So it doesn't care. It doesn't matter But of all places midvale is where they're gonna drop. Yeah midvale shopping center in woolworth Logan Paul and ksi will be and there's gonna be thousands of children Who organized this? I know I know I got the I got to call up early because I got invited to to do some influence of shit and I Like I was like this is an opportunity I don't want to feel like I'm a cloud chaser But it'd be cool to at least meet ksi because I never liked logan paul and I'm not hating on him It's just my personal like if it was in front of me. I shake his hand and I'd be like, hey man Good for you. You just don't it's just not a vibe you connect with. No Like he's he's done well to get out of all that shit that he did like years ago and and allegedly now He's a scammer from the crypto shit because he's scammed heaps of he did a rug pool on fucking some coin that he did This is all allegedly, you know, like the internet's internet, you know, nobody knows you're a dog Yeah, um, no, there's a lot of evidence and there's a lot of yeah a lot of evidence, but um The the business side of it the the attention-seeking side of it. I I'm like, yeah, you're done well But the the thing about it that pisses me off is All these kids that are going to go there They don't have that critical thinking of why he's famous or what value he brings to them Yeah, so this is why I'm doing podcasts like this. This is why As that audience grows They can grow with me and I can start giving them value Because I don't want to fucking do this like skits and shit anymore. I don't do it anymore I do fun stuff every now and then but I want Educational driven stuff. That's fun. It's called edutainment. Yeah. There's no like I ask kids all the time What do you like about Logan Paul or what do you like about me as well? And they're like, oh, you're funny. I'm like, okay Ten years from now What sort of value does that bring, you know, but then I look back at like Jim Carrey for example best example This guy this guy's an all-time I I got a lot of humor from him and he made me laugh when I was younger and now he's A lot of people say he's off his rocket because he's all philosophical and he goes we're just spirits floating around Like who are we really here and all this shit and I'm just like I vibe with that me too because it makes me think I was wondering where you were going because I'm like, I'd vote with that. Yeah, it makes me think it's a man at peace Yeah, and I vibe with that, you know, he's not chasing the bag anymore. He just wants to make art Yeah, I like I'd love to have a conversation with him, but then he'd be like, is this microphone even here Yeah, I think he might yeah At a point you're like, yeah, dude, we get it. Yeah, but truly I'm proud of you Yeah, I spent sure but that's that's what I want to really kind of get to where I'm Where I'm going to help kids and they go. Oh, that's that video. I I saw about sev's Thoughts on getting my first car. Thank fuck. I saw that video because it made me think Is a 30 thousand dollar loan on a brand new car worth as much as buying a five thousand dollar Third hand car from the car yard down the road. That's the sort of shit. I want to help them with Not buy my drink that has just all this shit in it That you're only buying because I'm cool and you you want to Be the hype you have the fear of missing out like no like if I had my own drink It would be some some sort of sparkling water Like this and I know kids don't like sparkling water. So it'd be funny But like have you heard of that death liquid liquid death drink? Yeah, I don't know what it is. It's just water It's literally just water. They've just marketed it differently And it's like one of the top top brands in the world now. They've got merchant shit. Yeah, it confuses me They don't have it here yet So maybe I can pull up a deal and get liquid death to sponsor the podcast and I'll if I can have liquid death You know get a sparkling version of liquid death because I'm liquid sev liquid sev liquid sev. That sounds like something else. Yeah I'll be honest. I'm I'm down for attention. I'm down for liquid sev. He gets spots of me Spots of me anytime. That's it. That's it. All right. How do we find your your shows and When when can we expect a netflix special? Never The netflix special is dead unless you're already one of the people that gets paid for netflix specials. It's all about youtube Um, that's why guys that I'm looking that I look towards uh mark normand arish of fear Sam maril they've all got That's how that they've done it is released for free let people find it So that's that's what's coming up there. My show here will be done by then by the time this comes out But the shows in america follow me at old mate douglas on all the socials YouTube any of that uh listen to my hip hop stuff. It's funny. It's fun Some of it's really dark and twisted and so are you so Yeah, nice listen if you can leave them with one quote or a piece of advice, what would it be? Um I've got two one is a positive attitude may not get you anywhere in life But it'll annoy enough people to make it worth the effort and the other one is uh I don't know man. Just love yourself and love your friends and um just Be happy love that or work hard so that you can be happy at least, you know, you're not going to be happy every day, but Fucking try That's it and and make sure that yeah You look after yourself first because if you're not good for yourself, you can't you're not good for anybody else No, you've got to be selfish to to be altruistic. Yes. Yeah, I like that So uh old mate douglas Hayden douglas. That's me hit him up his uh His uh real last name is uh mitten hurtful like a glove I'm gonna wear him like a glove for saying that on air So you can stalk his old mice base account Yeah If you if you can retrieve the music and stuff from it, please do because I got some songs on there They're pretty good that I can't get off So feel free to stalk and uh, if you see him on the street, um, don't ask him for gear I'm out. Oh, actually one more thing. Yeah You can do this. Um, what's on your feet? Shoes. Oh the grapes. I don't I'm not as much of a sneakerhead as you are right the grapefives Uh, uh, put one up one more time They're gonna be the I'm I'm embarrassed. I've got a scuffle. No, you're wearing them. That's fine. I'm upset Don't be embarrassed showing off my legs. So the grapefives they're they're a classic. They're uh, they're a sort after pair and um, you know, um They're coming back Hard in style the fives, especially the silhouette. I get a lot of compliments from them Uh, always from dudes, which is perfect. You know, that's what I'm going for. Yeah, ugly dudes ugly dudes who love shoes That's why that's why I do what I do Just to build my network of Ugly dudes. That's why I'm here. Yeah. Yeah, perfect. See we've got a new friend Shout outs to all the people involved with everything. Um shout outs to plus two for giving me shirts And shout outs, uh, not these guys shout outs to hunt and brew for giving me coffee Um, they just give me coffee and I drink it. It's nice And uh shout outs to douglas for being here. Thank you sir and uh being here like just genuinely um, he's made it through he's gone through shit and uh internally and externally And he survived and uh, good luck in america. Thank you, sir And I'm keen to see what comes out of it. I'd love to do another one of these which isn't so heavy one day Yeah, so I've also got power way through. I'm like fuck. This is morbid. No, it's fine. It's fine. It's good People need to hear it. But we'll uh, we'll have some fairy floss and uh, you know, just you know, have some children Sitting in the background. So a little bit more cautious That sounds horrible. Yeah, sure I get of my working with children's checks. I'm good. Um Oh, I know never mind As always good. Thanks Oh