 When the narcissist is out for revenge, narcissists are very vengeful. They will often be out seeking to harm you in return for a perceived injury. They can be resentful and unforgiving and they can hold grudges, whether not willing to forgive or excuse people's faults or wrongdoings. They can be bitter because they believe that they have been treated unfairly. They can seem infuriated and exasperated where they will hold strong feelings of anger and dislike sometimes for a lifetime because they believe that you have treated them badly. So they're often seeking satisfaction at your expense as though you were duty bound to indebted to them or as though you must fulfill their wishes, expectations or needs. These types of narcissists are usually vulnerable or covert. They're more introverted, insecure and extremely sensitive to criticism. They may blame you for their mistakes, lash out at perceived disapproval and exploit you for their own personal gain. Sometimes they're very entitled so they always have to get what they want but of course there are times when people don't get what they want and when this happens to the narcissist even though they may have been given positive feedback or ways that they can improve. They don't take it as something helpful or encouraging even though they're not being discriminated against and treated differently than other people. So it's not that it's biased or that they're held at a disadvantage. They may have an equal and fair chance just like anyone else and yet they still can't learn from it even in situations where the other person may have been better qualified or had better experience in their minds it's still unjust and unfair. So they will always be looking for ways to deny or contradict it. They won't use it to learn, grow or be better in the future because in their minds they were entitled to it so they believe that they have experienced a disservice or an injustice even though you may have done everything in your power to please and satisfy them. It's just never enough, nothing you do will ever make them happy because it's not your problem to fix. They have a mental disorder so instead of accepting their own faulty judgments and interpretations they will bring in solicitors and they will begin their campaign against you because they believe that you have taken something from them. So of course when they move on to the next situation they're already looking for reasons to defame the next person's character because they already believe that they have been wronged and they can't be satisfied so it carries on to whoever else they're dealing with and they will still have this desire to punish you whether you leave them or they leave you either way it can still affect them because they always feel like they're missing out on something. They feel like there's something they've lost or something that they could have had and if you leave them or you don't desire to be involved with them for whatever reason they treat it as disrespect as though you have insulted or offended them because it caused an emotional wound it was an uncomfortable and unpleasant experience for them. So it caused them deep pain, anger and fear and they believe that they had lost a special right advantage or immunity even if all you did was criticize them and what you said may have been accurate but if they misperceived it they may have taken it as rejection as though you dismissed or refused their proposal or idea as non-acceptance as though you turned them down so then they will often come to you without opinions or explanations about the situation where they will comment on your lack of knowledge or ability or they may say that you lack honesty or moral principles or as though your behavior is not good or acceptable in society and as though you're responsible for their pain. So they dominate you, they exercise control over you because they have to be the most important person in your life they need to have a command and position over you because they can't deal with the fact that you want nothing to do with them or that they can't be a control factor in your life so they will act stubborn and naive and they will try to change the natural course of progression of things just so it means that they have an opportunity to decide or control something they will show a dog determination not to change their attitude or position in spite of good arguments and reasons to do so because they just want to be difficult and inconvenient. They want to cause hardships and problems, they want to make things awkward, where they're not easy to please or satisfy which may seem very childish and immature but it's because they just want to have control because in their minds it feels better when they're in charge even though it's actually not good for them or for other people a lot of their decisions have no meaning and make no sense because they're ridiculously impractical and ill advised they're foolish and logical and irrational they display a lack of careful consideration of the possible consequences of their actions they lack the capacity to gain an accurate or deep intuitive understanding they're self-centered which is why they're so excessively fond of talking while not listening much to other people which results in a lack of awareness and insight and it causes them to be very difficult to reason with they will target vulnerable people or dominate those who they deem to be equal or superior to them by saying or doing things in order to prove that they are better to where they develop this art or practice of successfully outdoing you of surpassing and overshadowing you but they're very careful about targeting those who are in a higher position because they know that it could get them into trouble but sometimes it's like they just can't help themselves so when they do target those who are superior to them they do it in a subtle way where it's so delicate and precise that it's difficult to analyze or describe it's complex and understated it's under the radar where they make use of clever and indirect methods to achieve it and they see it as a form of craftsmanship or as though there's some kind of mastermind when the reality is that a covert narcissist is nowhere near as skilled as a grandiose or even a vulnerable narcissist and that's before you even get into the spectrum of psychopathy the craft of mediation can often seem comical and amusing especially if you're an observer of it and you're looking at it from the outside you may even find that you can see through their gaslighting very quickly and easily because there's often no thought that even goes into it it's just whatever they're thinking about in the moment because they're clearly in a lot of pain they're experiencing a lot of annoyance anxiety and even boredom they're not satisfied with the way things are which is why they complain a lot and they're unreasonable and difficult to deal with because they're in denial they believe their own lies so they have great difficulty growing as a person because they're not open to new ideas or experiences even their revenge tactics and strategies are just things that they've learned in childhood they're so childish and immature they think it's strange and wonderful when it's just simply creepy and weird to anyone else everything they do is reactive it's just a response to something another person has said or done and they will often start smear campaigns and force their flying monkeys who are typically just these unintelligible fools who act on the narcissist's behalf they engage in an important work obediently for the narcissist they're like the narcissist dogs and they have few or no important responsibilities they typically have nothing better to do with their lives which is why everything they do is not designed to change your way of thinking or to change anything about the current situation because flying monkeys are narcissistic as well or they may have some other cluster B disorder so they have no interest in changing anything they're not seeking a sense of resolve everything they do is designed to punish by dragging you into the world of unfairness and discontentment when the narcissist is out for revenge it's clear that they are constantly thinking about you they've been thinking carefully about you for a long period of time they've been having deep thoughts about you and it resulted in emotional distress because they've been focusing on things that they found insulting or unfair they've been focusing on what they believe rather than what actually happened they've imagined it as greater or more impactful than it actually was until it took over their minds and it became intolerable and insufferable it became something that they can no longer endure until it aroused fierce anger shock and indignation to where they now show an unreasoning desire for revenge when it was all just something that they generated in their own mind rather than the actual event that took place in reality and this need for revenge is what eventually destroys themselves and everything around them but even in the midst of the carnage that they have caused they will still blame you because in their mind you made them do it and they believe that their desire for revenge will relieve them from their anxiety or distress when it never does it just agitates and works them up even more it gets them all riled up it infuriates them to the point where everything they do is about revenge it's all about trying to outdo you and to prove that they are better than you when all it does is prove how contemptible they really are because no normal sane person is going to go out of their way to do these things to someone it's meaningless and purposeless it serves no purpose other than to temporarily relieve their pain and distress but they will continue on their campaign until you finally give in and they may see it as though they show any confident and forceful personality as though they're being assertive so that people take notice when all they're really doing is breaking you down until you finally say yes even if you're just saying yes to stop them from criticizing you or from putting pressure on you or just to get rid of them because all this really comes down to is their lack of emotional regulation they have an inability to regulate their own emotions which is why even if they did manage to destroy you they wouldn't learn anything from it they wouldn't grow as a person it would just present some other problem or difficulty to them because their desire for revenge is not logical or reasonable so in the end no one actually wins all that happens is everyone gets to see the narcissist for what they are they just end up exposing themselves to the world while still being unable to see it themselves because they lack insight and death of discernment they can't even tell that you don't take them seriously because you already know that it's foolish and unacceptable it's just that they don't want to be on the other end of it because a lot of times they know that they've done a number on you they know that they've deceived humiliated and criticized you in a calculated and thorough way but they don't want to accept it they can't deal with the shame so they live in denial they detach from truth and reality and they engage in vengeful tactics which ultimately are rebellious aggressive and self-destructive because it ends up having an adverse and contrary effect which is very different to what they originally intended so they just end up causing serious harm to themselves they end up destroying everything in their path before they even consider admitting to themselves that something is wrong with them which of course is something a narcissist would never do but even if they did by the time they arrived at that conclusion it would already be too late they would have no choice but to continue on their path because the damage is done and a lot of times it is irreversible it's beyond repair it's not able to be undone because they've already burnt the bridge they've destroyed their path connections reputations and opportunities they've commit themselves to an irreversible course by going off on their campaigns and showing this unreasoning desire for revenge with no sense of resolve and although they may try to hide it I genuinely believe that this is the thing that haunts them because it permeates throughout all of that actions behaviors it's the reason why they hold grudges for life it's the reason why they can't let go because deep down they already know that things would have turned out very differently if they were out of the picture if they had never been a part of your life if they never got involved they know that your life would have been very different they know that it's them thank you for watching if you found this video helpful please give it a thumbs up share your thoughts in the comment section hit the subscribe button to receive the notifications if you would like to support the channel you could donate at paypal.me.narcsurviver you can book a one-on-one with me on my website it's narcsurviver.co.uk thank you for watching and I'll talk to you soon