 There's a thing, the post-traumatic stress, and there's also a thing that no one ever talks about, which is post-traumatic growth, which is like, yeah, you can grow from this shit. I feel like part of the thing where you say- Rather not. Yeah, you'd rather feel bad for yourself. No, you'd rather not have that shit happen. Of course, but what I'm saying is it's gonna happen. And the thing that I feel like you maybe didn't have the right balance of was like, how much of this shit is just making me tougher, and how much of this is making me tougher in a way that's not helpful? I mean, I would say like 85% of it was not helpful. It wasn't. I mean, to this day, my energy sucks. Like when I go to a party, like I am that fucking traumatized person that feels comfortable being over in the corner, and like not talking to anyone. And then what I fucking hate about that is, is everything all right? Is everything all right? It's like, do you ever think I had a different childhood? This is me partying, can you just fuck off? Oh my God, dude. I went to a fucking, I went to Madonna. This fucking guy kept turning around going like, hey man, you know, make sure you have a good time now. You know, cause I have resting like fucking drama face. Yeah, me, I do have it too. And it's just like, dude, I am on fucking, I ate 10 milligrams of weed right now. Fucking enjoying this shit. I'm thinking about where I was when these songs came out. And he kept fucking doing it. And he kept touching me. I don't like fucking being touched. And it was just like these fucking people, the happy kids. You know what I mean? And just, just trying to be like, I don't know. He wasn't trying to be an asshole, but like it was just like, can you just fucking leave me alone? Can you, I'm trying to be at the concert with my wife. Can you just fucking leave me alone? He wouldn't. Couldn't do it. Yeah. Hey, hey, you just kept doing that. And then if you say you have to stop, you're an asshole. No, I mean, I was saying that. I was like, buddy, I get it. I go, you're gonna keep making the same fucking joke. Oh, and he kept doing it? Yeah. Yeah, it's not good. No, he was like, just ha ha ha ha ha ha. Like he just, one of those people like shit doesn't land. It's like, he was like a dad. I have a dad joke, like Colin Quinn. I complain, but who, listen, remember that chunk? He used to do, I used to love that. Those stupid fucking office jokes that I heard a million times. And that's why I love Colin's joke. Cause I never questioned them. It's just like, this is part of the office experience. And he was the first guy to be like, how many fucking times can somebody say that? And you know, and then you just don't, you just be like, it's an old joke already. And then you see it on like Instagram. Instagram, like there's like hacky, there's like hacky formulaic jokes that people, like remember YouTube, for like 10 years, somehow people kept fun. Was this film with the potato? How many times could somebody write that? It's like, no, it's old technology. You know what it is. The first time somebody wrote it, it was funny. And then everybody just like, I want to be the potato guy on this fucking. Yeah, I'm going to do that comment. Yeah, it was literally like the pie in the face. Just still funny to me. I feel like you... Stink. No, I feel like you did pretty great. On what? Just in life. No, I did, yeah, no, I did. You fucking did great. You're an unbelievably great comedian. Like unbelievably great. I noticed that, you know, it doesn't really help you, you know, day to day. I didn't ask for your help, Neil. No. How the fuck? I just did that because I know you want me to do that. No, I don't. You know, I thought of a funny line. I don't want you to do that. You know, I thought I was out to breakfast with my wife the other day. And this guy comes into the restaurant and this person behind the counter said, hey, how are you? You having a nice day so far? I immediately thought I wanted the person to be like, and if I'm not. What is that? What do you want? You just want to fucking... You want to have... I want to set that and just let it sit there. But then I would have been like, I'm just fucking with you. I'm having a great day. But it was just such a... Are you having a nice day so far? It's just such a... It was a weird way. Feels like pressures on you. Well, what are you fucking... Like you're checking in on me, you're doing a study, you have like a clip. Am I having a nice day so far? Yeah. How are you coming along in life? Like what? It was just an annoying question. Is there such a thing as being friendly to you? Or is it all kind of aggravating? There is, but there's just... Hey, how are you? Yeah. There was just something about the detail of that. Are you having a nice day so far? Yeah. And if I'm not, what are you going to help me out with it? You got some avocados. This is what I... You got some avocado toast. It's just going to... Whenever I'm having... Whenever I'm having... Just going to erase my childhood? Interactions with you, I'd get upset and I'd be like, but he's going to use this for a premise and this energy, this icebreaker and this fucking... What do you mean? Why would I... You're already filming it. It's done. It's gone. No, no, no. I'm not saying you're going to use it for a premise. I'm saying, if we had an interaction... You have energy that sometimes has hurt my feelings, but I know that you're going to take the spirit of it and you're going to aim it at something that I want you to aim it at. And I'm thankful for it. All right. That's all. Well, you have the aloofness of a North Korean dictator. I totally agree. I don't want to have it. I don't want to have it. Yeah, I don't know that I'm doing that either, but I just know enough about your family. Uh-huh. You let it go. Your voice went up an octave. I go, enough about your family. You go, uh-huh. Yeah. Yeah. No, I know. I know this is another thing that I know without even knowing is whatever you went through was worse. Then what you went through? Yes. Based on the look of my face. No. Based on my go on. It was the supersized version because it was you had a bigger family than me. Yeah. So which just all it does is it just the pressure gets greater. And yeah, in whatever nourishment, little nourishment that is in there gets ringed out. No, it's a, yeah. You know when you sit. Yeah. And that's why I don't walk around saying to people, like if I see somebody off in the corner, I'm like, all right, they had a rough one and I leave them alone. I go, oh, just smile. Yeah. Like that was a big fucking thing when I was in New York. I was a beautiful woman come down the street. They'd be like, smile. Sweetie, yeah. And it's like, for what? Like, no, I'm not smiling. Maybe I'm in a bad mood. Or if I walk around smiling, ugly fucking morons like you think I want to fuck them now. And then I got to deal with you asking for my number. Yeah, they can't even make eye contact. It's like, this is the look I have to have on my face because there's assholes like you out on the street. Yeah. The shitty part for me is like, I don't even feel that way anymore. Do you know what I mean? Like about whatever I went through. I now I'm like past it, but the face hasn't caught up. The face doesn't catch up. I know. Yeah. That's one of the things that haunts me. Is who was I supposed to be? Before all this shit happened to me. Because people are like, well, this is who you are. All your experience, blah, blah. It's like, no. This is a reaction. No, this is a reaction to shit. Who you're supposed to be is growing up in an environment where you're allowed to figure out who you are. Hey, did you like that? Did you like that? Yeah, did you like it though? You want more? Don't want to work? Would rather watch videos of me grab assing with people. First of all, go up here to subscribe and then go up here to watch more clips. This is like when the weatherman says there's a high pressure system coming in. Although I'm not really used to the green screen.