 just here in my hotel room tonight. So yeah, I'm sure you've already seen the title. Narc Saviva goes in this one. And of course, there is a reason for that. I mean, there's always a reason why we do what we do. I mean, that's what this is about. Yeah, I mean, today I was meant to take a flight I was meant to get on a plane and I didn't want to get on the plane. But yeah, I generally don't really like heights. Even though in some of my videos you may have seen me climb mountains and going on a big wheel but I actually don't like heights. I try and face my fears but sometimes it can be difficult. But of course, I was at the airport earlier today and I was waiting for my flight and I was going to get on that flight. Whatever happened. You know, no matter how I felt about it. After I've probably spent the last two or three months watching YouTube videos where flights have gone wrong. I was still going to get on that flight today. But deep down, I didn't really want to do that. And it's funny because I didn't end up getting on the flight. Something went wrong. Now I'm sitting in the hotel room and I was looking at the flight update and it showed that the flight was delayed and it looks like it was delayed by over one hour. So something must have happened on that flight. I don't know what. Maybe they had pretty strong turbulence. May have been quite uncomfortable. There was some kind of delay. Maybe I wasn't meant to get on that flight. Maybe it would have scarred me for life. Even though those are things that deep down I really want. Have you ever felt that when it's like the more you want something, the more you resist it because deep down you believe you can't have it because you look at it like, well, if I can have it, why haven't I got it? Why haven't I got it right now? Oh, that means I can't have it because I haven't got it. And it's that belief that is killing you inside. And as soon as you take away that belief you will see some amazing things in life. I mean, just that, it's just that one belief thinking you cannot have something or be something. You can't do what you want or get what you want. Just that belief, just if you believe it enough it will come true. It really will, whatever you believe that becomes your reality. Everything in your life is a reflection of what you think you deserve. And you have to look at things and think do I deserve this or not? And this does relate to narcissism as well because look at it like, if you really believed that you didn't deserve to be with a narcissist for long periods of time, why didn't you leave? Why were you there for so long? And that is how you should know that maybe you did think that you deserved that. Maybe the narcissist was a reflection of what you thought you deserved. Because if that was not true they wouldn't have got a foot in the door. That never would have happened because you would have kicked their butts out at the first opportunity. You never would have let someone like that in your life. I know people are gonna say, yeah, but I was tricked. I was manipulated. And my answer to that would be, yeah, okay, maybe you were, but there are always those red flags that we overlook. If you look back, you had every reason to get rid of them, but those little things that they did and be deep down, we thought we deserved that because if you know you don't deserve something, I mean, just look at it towards the end of the relationship when you really know that you do not deserve to be treated that way. Then you're really fighting to get out of it, to get away from them. Because that's when it sinks in, you realize that you don't deserve it. And that's really what it's all about, is realizing what you do and do not deserve because that will change everything in your life. And remember that only we can change or improve our lives. It's not on someone else. You can't expect someone else to do the work for you. I mean, we can blame the narcissist for the rest of our lives, but is that actually gonna change anything? Of course not. It's not gonna change unless we do something. They're always gonna be that way. So you can blame them all you want. It's not gonna make a difference, which is why to take back our power, we need to realize what we really deserve. And how do you know what you deserve in life? And my answer to that would be, just look back for your life, all of the work you put in, everything you gave to people, your time, your energy, your money, because that's valuable too. Look at all of the things you went through, all of the suffering and pain, all of the work you put in, everything that you achieved. So of course, you do deserve better than what the narcissist had to give to you. You deserve a lot more than that. You don't deserve to be mistreated. You don't deserve abuse. And I think one of the main reasons why is when you care about other people, and I mean you genuinely care, like even if no one's looking and you see someone in pain, you just get that, just pulls you down. You get that sinking feeling like you just can't stand to see people going through it. And you wanna do anything you can to help. And often you get exploited. People wanna elevate at your expense. And when you've been through that, you do deserve a whole lot more. And you will get a lot more, maybe not straight away. It may take some time, but you will get it in the end. I can promise you that. It always comes back, not just the bad things, but the good things too. Trust me, all of that pain, that suffering you went through, it will be worth it in the end. It will. And you may not see it right now, but in time it will begin to make a lot more sense. As I said, everything in our lives is a reflection of what we think we deserve. If you think that you deserve more, that's what you're gonna get. And if you really want something, you're gonna get that eventually too. Just like I was in the airport earlier today, thinking in my head, I don't wanna get on this flight. And it was like I had a magic genie because my wish suddenly came true. I couldn't get on the flight. And then I was sitting there in the airport, thinking I wish I could get on the flight now. But it's a bit late then. You know, when you've been telling yourself all of this time, okay, I want this, I want this, and then you change your mind, but then it's too late because you've already put it out there for such a long time that this is what you want. So you've gotta work extra hard to show God, the universe, whatever it is, what it is that you really want. But yeah, everything in our lives is just a reflection of what we think we deserve. And often we take these opportunities that we find in our lives. We take opportunities that we're not really happy with. It's okay, I'll take it. And then later we have regrets. Problem is, you take one opportunity and there could have been something much greater for you if you were just waited, if you were just being patient. That's really what it is with these narcissists. There could have been something so much greater for us. What did we do? We settled for less, less than what we thought we deserved because I think in the beginning we did notice these red flags and we knew we deserved better than that. But we still took the opportunity even though we knew that we deserved more. That is a problem. But we do these things sometimes out of loneliness. What happens? That's the thing. You know, when you settle for less, which is what we've all done it when we met these narcissists, we all settled for less. And when we did that, what happens? When we gave everything, we gave all of our time, money, energy, effort, put it all into this person and what did they do? They showed us every reason why we just made a big mistake. They showed us every reason why they do not deserve to be in our presence. They showed us every reason why we deserve more. That's what happens when you settle for less than what you know you deserve. Whether it's God, the universe is gonna come back and show you, no, you're better than this. And it is really gonna get you. It will tear you down. It will destroy everything in your life. Because God or the universe, it's trying to send you a message and show you, no, you're better than this. Get away from that. That's what it's trying to show you. And you're looking around and thinking, oh, why are all of these crazy things happening in my life? It's trying to send you a message. It's trying to send you a message. It's trying to show you, no, don't do this. I think I just got an email from YouTube. I think I'm monetized again. I could be wrong. It looks like an email just came in. I'll have to check that after this. But yeah, I know it's a very deep video tonight. Sometimes I just get into these moods where I just start thinking about life. I don't know why. I really don't know why this happens sometimes, but it's interesting. I don't know, maybe some of you can relate to this, but I felt this way my entire life. My entire life, I've always just been very curious about everything. Always wanted to learn more about things. And I was always looking at the bigger picture. I always wanted to know about just life. And I remember one time in particular, maybe I was about 10 years old and my neighbor, he was a church minister and he was quite worried they're gonna be dead and that's the end. We're gonna live forever, forever's a long time. It could get very boring. And my neighbor, the church minister, he was very shocked, but he was like, yes, you're right. And I think back and I'm amazed. How could a 10-year-old child have the mental capacity to even think like that? It still amazes me to this day, but I'm sure there's gonna be viewers out there that can relate and maybe you thought these kinds of things when you were younger. And it's interesting because I think, what is it that causes us to think that way? Why is it such a concern to us? And why of that particular time in our lives? And then you look at people who are much older than you are at that time and you just can't understand why aren't they thinking that way? Why are they so caught up in their little problems which don't even matter? Like in the grand scheme of things, it really doesn't even matter, like little things. And that's actually, funny enough, I was talking about how I'm afraid of heights and going on planes. That is exactly how I think. Whenever, like even right now when I'm looking outside my window, see everyone walking around, driving down there. Or when I go to the top of a skyscraper or I'm on a plane, they're little problems and it just doesn't even matter. It's not even a big deal. It's like a little blip in the grand scheme of things and even in your own life, it's not such a grand event and yet we blow it out of proportion. And I think the reason why we do that is because we've been taught to do that. Maybe by a narcissistic parent who made us think that these little things in our lives, oh, it's such a big deal. They turn these mole hurls into mountains. It's important to us right now. I won't be surprised if when we die then, it's kind of like back when you were in school and oh, then you leave school and it just doesn't even matter. When you go to university, you get a degree, then you leave and try and get a job. Then we start to learn how insignificant everything really is. At the time it was such a big deal. I think someone's really trying the broom but that may be the reason for the second problem. But I'm just in this state of mind right now so I'm just trying to put out what I can. I don't know how much of this you can actually see but I hope that at least some of it gets through. Yeah, that's often the thing with these narcissists. At the time, you know, they may seem very important like they have this great impact on our lives but then time goes by and you realize that they're really not that important after all. And you start to see more places, more people. You travel the world and you realize that they're just like a drop in the ocean. They're really not as great as they led you to believe because when you were with them, they made you think that they were the most attractive or powerful person in the world. And then when you leave, you start to wake up. It's like you've left the matrix. You've taken the red pill. You start to see things as they actually are. It's a powerful thing. But what is it that causes these things to happen? These little awakenings. Like why am I even sitting here right now talking about this stuff? And I think it does come from the lower emotional vibrational frequencies. You know, when our emotions are very intense, when we experience a lot of fear, shame, maybe even desire, and it's uncomfortable, we don't really wanna deal with it. But unlike a narcissist, we do deal with it. We sit with it, we give it space, give it time. And when we really do that, we process it, then we elevate to these higher frequencies. It's like we go into the acceptance, we begin to accept our state, our condition. And then we even become more enlightened where everything just starts to make sense in the world. And you can look at things and you realize a lot of bad things are happening in the world. Maybe even a lot of bad things are happening in your own life, but you realize that everything has to have a balance. Can't just be all good. If everything was just sunshine, unicorns and rainbows every day, that would get boring. So I think we do need that. We do need a balance, a mixture. And it makes me think, you know, people say that heaven is meant to be this perfect place where nothing goes wrong, everything is exactly as you want it to be. Well, that would get boring. That wouldn't be fun. If everything is perfect and it's exactly as you want it to be every single day, what is the point? What's the point in doing it? That's like playing a video game and you have all of the cheat codes. You can unlock all of the characters, all of the levels, all of the items, whatever it is. That gets boring after about 10 minutes. Try playing through the levels, the missions. Then you can play for hours every day. You never get bored. You want to get bored when you start getting blisters on your fingers. And yeah, I think it's the same thing with life. We need that. About that is what you will start to realize. Maybe not straight away after you've just been hurt by a narcissist, but at some point you will see that it's not about us having to find like some island somewhere where there's no toxic people and everyone's nice. That's not what we need. And of course that could never exist in the real world anyway, but it's actually good to have these toxic negative people. That isn't a bad thing. It's good for us because it helps us to grow, to develop, to become more aware of ourselves, to realize what we do want by seeing what we don't want. And that is really the amazing thing about life because when you realize that, you will see that people think that if God exists, why is there so much pain and suffering in the world? Because they don't realize that pain and suffering is actually helping you. God put that there for a reason. That wasn't a mistake and it's not meant to hurt you. It's there to help you to elevate. It increases your self-awareness, causes you to introspect even more and then you become stronger, wiser. You learn more about yourself. You know, if there is a heaven somewhere, we can't just go up there as we are. You know, with all of the problems that we all have, sometimes we wake up on the wrong side of the bed, we're not happy about something, we don't want to talk to anyone, we all go through that. But we can't enter heaven in that state when we come to the end of our lives. We need to be in a state of peace. Love, joy, enlightenment. And then we will just be more compatible with the heaven. But how do we get there? How do you get to these higher states of consciousness? You have to go through it. You have to suffer. There's no other way around that. And the more that you try and shelter yourself and hide away from it, it just comes back even worse because it's trying to show you, you need to see this. You need to experience this. You need to go through it. It's not gonna be nice. It may hurt, but it's gonna help you. It's a powerful mentality to have. To look back at the things that you went through and think, wow, those things may be the person that I am today. They made me more intelligent, wiser, more confident, more understanding of other people. Changed the way I think about the world for the better. Made me more awake. And that's what you should want. That's what you should strive for is to get to this point in your life where the mental processes that are initiating in your brain, this wisdom, this intelligence, this way of understanding things. You wouldn't trade that for anything in the world. Even if someone said that you could go back and do it all over again. And you could live differently, have different experiences, live the way that you wanted to without all of that pain and suffering. You wouldn't even do that. Because you look at it like, what's the point? Even if I get to experience all of that, I'd be asleep. I wouldn't really be able to enjoy it anyway because the only way that I can really experience things and really taste it is after I've gone through all of the suffering, which is kind of like a catch-22. But that's just how it is. You see a lot of people who are not at that state of consciousness where you may reside and they may look like they're happy, they may look like they have what they want, but they can't really feel it. They can't really experience it because you can't, not until you've been through that pain and suffering. It's kind of like, as I've mentioned before, what is more of a sweeter success? Is it climbing a mountain with your hands and it takes you hours to climb it? Or what if you just took a helicopter, just landed it on the top? Would you feel like you've achieved anything? Would you really enjoy that moment as much as if you had climbed from the very bottom and then you're covered in sweats, bruises? I think you're gonna appreciate it a lot more. And that, if there is a heaven out there somewhere, maybe that's what it's about because once you've been through all of these things in your life and then you finally get to the paradise, then you are really going to appreciate it. But you must first accept what you've been through. I mean, I've been through a lot of things in my life, a lot of pain and yeah, it's been tough. I've been through a lot of things that I didn't wanna go through. I met people that I probably shouldn't have been involved with, but it happened. Can't do anything about that now, but I look back and I accept it. And most importantly, look back without regrets, because the way I see it is, although it may feel like that was wrong now, I look back and I think, but at the time, was that not exactly what I wanted? And of course, it must have been otherwise, I wouldn't have manifested it into my reality. So yeah, I think that's important to remember. And that's how we can really live without regrets is by looking back and realizing that these things, that was once what you wanted. You may not want it right now and there may be a reason for that. That's a good one. Like that, REF, hell and heaven are already in our minds. That's why we should discern and master our minds and don't let the mind master you. You know, and it's funny you mentioned that because just before you die, whatever is in your mind, whatever you're thinking, whatever you believe in, whatever you think you're going, whatever your picturing in your mind, whether it's heaven or hell, that is where you go. Because as I said before, our beliefs create our reality. We get a reflection of whatever we think we deserve. And that's how it is in this world. It's amazing the power of our thoughts. You can wake up in the morning and whatever is going on in your mind. If you think the world is a great place, a horrible place, you will get a reflection of that throughout your day. If you really believe it, because a person who believes that everyone is warm and friendly and the world is a nice place, people who really believe that even when things go wrong, they may not even notice or they won't place much importance on it because they tend to focus more on the positive things and they continue to get a reflection of that. But then when you believe that people are not good, the world is a bad place, it's dangerous, then you keep getting a reflection of that. And when things go wrong, you remember it. Whatever you believe, you keep finding evidence of that. People who believe that the world is a good, safe place, they keep finding evidence of that. So they keep believing it. But again, these things can work against you too because if you're where they narcissist, you might believe that they're good people and you may get a reflection of that too, but then you're overlooking all of the bad things and then after some time, it is gonna come back to get you. And that's why, as I said, there needs to be a balance with everything, good and bad. And we need to accept both the good and the bad. You can't just blindly ignore when something goes wrong. If you do that, well, just look at what happened in your relationship with a narcissist. When you overlook the red flags, it comes back to get you even more. It will keep coming back until you learn the lesson, until you finally understand. Prophetic perfection asks, can you tell your story in a video for your new subscribers? And I just feel like my mind is connected to another world. I can only really be philosophical right now. I'm just not in that state where I can talk too much about myself. If that's weird, I don't know. I don't know if other people go through that, but yeah, I'm gonna go and check that email now, see if the channel has been monetized again. Hopefully it has, because I really wanna get things back to normal on here. And I wanna put out some new content, more motivational videos, more positive talk, and maybe more videos of this style. So yeah, it'll be good just to get things back to normal again, because I have to say I've noticed the last few days, the views have been increasing, and I haven't been making many videos lately, and I miss that. Every morning I'd wake up and I have so much passion to share this message with you, to help people. I really wanna get back to that. Even though I've been doing it for four and a half years now, I really enjoy it. I just feel like that's what I was born to do, is to share this wisdom that I have.