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The ghost of Elvis Presley

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Published on Feb 22, 2014

This is my (and Rhys Ifans') old school. In fact, I'm still waiting for Mrs Glenys Prydderch-Jones of the chemistry department to return my Y-Fronts ( Glenys always liked her mementos). I never saw Elvis while I was there but I believe there were a couple of sightings of the Loch Ness Monster in the gents toilet. Aside from myself and Ifans, other notable former pupils include Tegid Ellis, Angharad Davies, Leon Trotsky, Victoria Beckham, The Kids from Fame, The Moscow state circus and wee Jimmy Krankie. Love and kisses to all the girls I knew ( sorry girls but due to certain 'paternity issues' my whereabouts must remain a secret. No, really.) My commiserations to all the female members of staff I had to turn down (only so many hours in the day) and sincere apologies to 'Old Stinks' the caretaker who took the blame for the exploding turnip incident when in fact it was down to me. Ni lwyddir heb lafur indeed. Invoice me for this microphone.

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