 Hi, everybody. Welcome back. I'm Lisa Larson, Animal Communicator, and I'm here with Alicia Alatrice Day. How are you doing, Alicia? Hi, Lisa. How are you? Good. I want to apologize to you guys because I know we've been doing this series on euthanasia, and we should have posted something a couple of weeks ago, but we had some technical difficulties and some personal difficulties, so we just didn't get around to it. But we will persevere. The last episode, we tried to prepare you for the process of helping lift your animal up and know what the process of having the vet come over is like and what it's like to lift them up to the spirit world. Today, what we want to talk about is those initial days, like once the vet leaves, that day, the vet leaves, and those initial days, what you're going to be doing, what you're going to be feeling, things to help, how to deal with those things, and that's what we're focused on today. Okay, that sounds great. Yeah, before we get to that, I was thinking, if you can share when you talk to the doctor a bit about the, you know, the shots. Yeah, I talked to a vet, and she does nothing but home euthanasia, and she was great. And she explained to me that the first shot, when I told you that there's two shots, well, in fact, there are three ingredients in that first shot. One is an anti-anxiety medication, one is a pain medication, and one is a sleeping medication. And I believe she said it was the sleeping medication. If you remember, when I talked about sometimes animals might get a little anxious from the first shot or look like they're frightened or something, she says, mostly that happens with cats who are pretty alert and maybe smaller dogs like chihuahuas. It doesn't happen with everybody, but she's aware that she thinks that it's the sleeping medication that the animals react to. So there are some options. For instance, you can ask to have just the anti-anxiety and the pain medication given first. Now, that means there will be another needle stick, but, you know, you're kind of making those decisions. Personally, I think I would do that because they're already getting pain medications. So the second needle stick shouldn't be as much. But the second needle stick would be the sleeping medication that puts them to sleep before they give them the shot that stops their heart. So I think in the last episode, I even said, you know, I think I even put in the bottom, in the lower third, that you can ask for, you know, an anti-anxiety medication first. And there's problems with asking for it before that comes over. But you can ask them to separate those medications out if you feel that your cat or dog would, you know, might react to that. So I did want to address that. And I thank you for talking. And there's a couple of other things, Alicia, that you and I had spoken about that I wanted to mention is making sure we kind of looked at the heels of it instead have somebody there with you. But I don't think I pressed it hard enough that it's really important to have someone close to you to help you through the process. If you live alone, maybe have somebody that's really close to you, stay the night with you. And when I say somebody close to you, I'm talking about somebody that you don't have to talk to if you don't want to, that you can just be in their company, you know what I mean? Those type of people. And, you know, because it's going to be, as we're going to talk about today, it's going to be hard once that leaves. So you want somebody there to help you through that process, but also who will stay with you. And the other thing is, I don't think we mentioned, is making sure that if you have other animals in the house, make sure to let them see the body of the animal who is transitioning, because it helps them deal with it. And you can prepare them for it by telling them in your own words or having a communicator tell them, you know, either before or after, you know, but always remember that those animals who are remaining, they've got a bit of confusion, they're going through their grief. And, you know, I'm sure that we will end up talking about that as well. In this episode, which I'm calling dealing with the aftermath, and that initial aftermath, because you know, Alicia, how hard that is, it's hard on everybody, whether we've been through it a million times, or whether we've only been through it, you know, whether it's our first time. I have, when Chiqui passed, I had my best friend as a support, so that she took off everything, and I didn't have to think about anything. Yeah, can you give us some tips when what to do when the vet leaves with the body, and you are all alone, and you don't know what to do because we get confused and we are lost, you know? Yeah, we are, we're completely lost. Yeah, so, you know, that's why I said have that support, you know, I mean, you know, I know that when I am working with somebody and I'm helping that animal cross, I will always tell them I'm not going to call you afterwards, because I figure they're not going to want to talk to me, you know? I mean, I will, I'll write them an email, and I'll say, when you're ready, you can call me. But, you know, you want to have somebody close by with you that you can just be with. And I think that's really important, too. Somebody you don't have to talk to, somebody you don't have to explain yourself to, you know, and it's going to be hard to sleep that night, you know? I mean, depending on what time you have it done, I mean, if it's earlier on in the day, maybe you can go out and take a walk in nature, whatever, if it's later on in the day, you know, if you don't have a substance abuse problem, I want to make sure they're clear there, but if you have, you know, if you want to have a glass of wine, if you have, you know, prescription for anti-anxiety, meds like Valium or something. And if you don't have any of that stuff, or you don't, you don't, you do have a substance abuse problem, there are other things like tryptophan is a naturally occurring amino acid in the body and coms, you down valerian root is something that's kind of a natural anti-anxiety and knowing that your animal is there and knowing that your animal is out of pain and not suffering. Yeah, definitely. And what else do you suggest to go through the following days when, you know, when you don't have your pet already with you anymore? Yeah, and I think that's where I say, like, you know, first of all, if you work, there's nothing wrong with, if you can do it, take some time off from work. I mean, you've had a death in the family. Now, other people might look at that and say, oh, it's not the same thing. Well, it is, you know, you have had a death in the family, your child has gone away, you know, so if you have, you know, if you can afford it, if you have the sick time, if you're able to take some time off work, you know, maybe, like I say, go take a walk out in nature, be away from everything that makes you, that reminds you of your animal, you know. Do little things, like I remember when Cuba passed, we went to the beach and I have pictures, I, you know, we drew a big heart, you know, in the sand and wrote his name and, you know, we did a little honoring of that to him, you know, and picked up rocks that we have to this day that meant something to us. And, you know, I mean, of course, if you have animals left in the house, you need to, you know, split your time and make sure that they're not feeling left alone, but so you have to take care of yourself and do the things that you need to do, but you also need to be there for them as well, and honoring their grief. But I think, you know, just taking care of yourself and taking some time for yourself, don't just sit and wallow, you know, I mean, that's the easiest thing to do is to just sit and wallow. But those first few days, even, you know, I mean, think of this, if you've ever had a human in your life past, you know, I mean, of course, humans, everybody you know comes over and, you know, those first few days, the first day, especially your house is filled with people and stuff like that, well, it's not going to be like that. But, you know, if you can have, you know, some, a few close friends or one close friend be with you, you know, to just those first few days, you just have to keep, you're never going to keep your mind off of things, but sometimes you need that distraction by going out and being in nature. And I don't even want to call it a distraction, because you're not going to be not thinking of them. But it's a way to process it, if you're someplace where you can, you know, you know, if you can stay busy in something that you're doing that makes you happy, you know, things day by day, without no rush, it's okay to feel pain. Yes, it's okay to feel pain. It's okay to accept it. And just because somebody tells you it's not, you know, oh, a million times, how many times did you hear after, after cheeky side, how many times did you hear it's just a, it's just a cat, you know, why are you being so overly reactive? It's just a cat. No, it's not just a cat. In fact, I was filling out something today with the vet, we have a home vet and she's going to be coming over. And I loved the the intake form because she said, what do you think of your animal is your animal, your child, a beloved family member, Justin, just a pet, you know, I mean, she had this whole, of course, I didn't even read the rest of them, because it's like all my animals are my kids, you know, so, you know, and the people, I'm assuming the people that are watching this, that's how you feel as well. And I hate to use the word should, but you know, we adopt them and they are our children. So just because somebody else doesn't understand it, just ignore it, you know, you understand that if for nothing else, if for nothing else, you know that you have two people who understand you and that's me and Alicia. Hey, I'm talking to you right here, right now, you who are feeling like you have nobody that understands how you are feeling about the loss of your animal, and you have at least two people right here, me and Alicia. So, you know, don't even give those people the time of day, they don't understand, they could never understand, and your pain is your pain, your grief is your grief, and it's real, and it's legitimate, and it's valid. Yes, and also, there's a point that we will receive the ashes, so can you explain a little bit what to expect when they when we receive the ashes? Yeah, you know, I mean, I think there's going to be a period of time before that, you know, because sometimes it can be up to two weeks, you know, a week or two before you can receive the ashes, and I just want to underscore that in those two weeks before you receive the ashes, you really need to take things day by day, you know, there's going to be, you know, it's going to be a blur for you, I mean, if you can wake up and take a shower, that's going to be, you know, that's going to be a big thing right there. If you can get up and take a shower and start your day, then that's really important, and you do what you need to do moment by moment, because that time in between the time that they take your animals, your animals body away in the time that you receive the ashes is a real weird spot, you know, I mean, I know that when we finally got Cuba's ashes back, I felt like, oh, he's he's finally coming home. But those two weeks in between, it's very odd, you know, I mean, there's there, it's it's you're kind of off center. So you want to make sure that you do what you need to do moment by moment, and don't rush to throw things away, you know, some people will rush or some people will push you into rushing to get rid of all their things and get past what you, you know, what is going to take way longer than what they want for you to get past. So regardless of their advice, they're going to tell you right away to go get another animal, you know, I mean, if if you're if you're human child past, would you if somebody's human child past, would you tell them just go down to the orphanage and get another one? No, you would not. It's your child, you have to grieve your child. And you know, that's the one thing that's that's different with with human beings. I think if I remember correctly, we like when my dad died, I thought we got his ashes back pretty quickly. I mean, when a human being dies, you kind of go through that process, the memorial process, and all of those things pretty quickly. And you have a lot of people around and all of this stuff. But with an animal, you've got it's, you know, you maybe got somebody to help you the first day. And then you've got these like two weeks before you get the ashes back. And you're just like, you don't really know, you know, what to do. So, you know, don't just know that you don't have to rush into anything. And when that time does come to pick up their ashes, I you maybe you can have if you can't do it, maybe you can find somebody to go pick them up for you. Now, Alicia, I know you said that that in your case, the vet brought them to your home. Yeah, so I've never had that experience. And I think the only time I ever remember picking up ashes was when I did it for my mom. Every time that I've had to do it, it's somebody's done it for me. My husband has done it or my mom's done it for me. It's a it's a it's a very difficult thing to do. But like I say, you know, I remember when Cuba came home, I remember waiting for Michael to get home because I just I got that little box and it's it's so traumatic. But I just felt like he was home. You know, so if you can, so if you can switch it, you know, switch it so that you can think of it like that, it's important. And, and you know, it's important to that. I suppose we talked about some of this the last time that did we talk the last time about the boxes and the different types of boxes? I think that we will come to talk in this podcast. Yeah, well, so that's another thing that, you know, I mean, you're going to need to tell them tell the vet before they take the body. And I'm sorry that some of this stuff got pushed over to this one, but we do want to cover it. You know, in the olden days, when I first started having to euthanize my animals, you just get them back in this ugly metal box. And I mean, it was actually the same my dad, it was it was actually the same type of boxes I got my dad ashes back. But now more often, they'll come in this like wooden box and they'll ask you before you tell them yes, I want them cremated or whatever. Some of them will engrave their names on it. So they're really nice. So it's one of those things. Well, you know, I used to go and bury the ashes or scatter the ashes and then not know what to do with the box. Well, now the box is so nice. You can make an altar with it. You know, you can put their pictures up. But even more new is if it's something that you would want to do something with berry or spread their ashes, there are biodegradable boxes as well. And, you know, they, you know, you might have to order them in advance. I don't think they're they're standard at any place, but you can ask for them. But I know that, for instance, I have my two cats, Cuban, Makana, we have an altar for them. And we actually have it in our wills that when I die, that I'm going to be buried well cremated and buried. All of our ashes are going to be scattered together. Yeah, when I received cheeky sashes, I made an altar. I like the candle to her. Oh, that's nice. So, you know, and but yes, I think that the grieving part is very difficult for most of us. And having a podcast like this. And podcasts and, you know, and people like that that educated like you telling us what to expect that help us a lot. And I really appreciate it. Oh, that's good. That's good. Yeah. And so you have an altar. Do you have any plans for what? I mean, do you have a will? Do you have anything that what happens to cheeky when something happens to you? No, but I told everybody that when I die, I want carashes with me. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And you know, and there are other things too. You know, like I say, I used to go and bury my ashes, my cat's ashes, and then I would plant a tree over them so that I always there was something always growing. But there are some people like there are places now that, you know, you can get you can get jewelry or gems made out of the ashes. Now, this isn't my thing, really. But some people, yeah, I mean, it's just a personal thing. But they make really beautiful things. They make blown glass things. They make little jewelry. Some things they can be just like a little piece of jewelry where there's some of the ashes are in it. Some things that the jewelry is actually made out of the ashes. So, you know, you have a lot of options if you if that's something that that is, you know, that feels right to you, that you feel like you would always carry them around with you, then you can you can do that too. But know that there are all of these options around, you know, I mean, there's just a lot of different options for what you can do. Also, in my case, I have a cheeky skirt in one of the Yeah, fur. I got some fur, Makana as well. Yeah, in the little thing. And yeah, you can get it made into like little I forget what it's called. It's not plastic. It's resin. Yeah, they put like in a resin, they make a resin jewelry out of it or something like that. Yeah. Yeah, that's awesome. It's important. And you know, I mean, it's you know, years down the line, you know, you may, you know, be in a different place, but every once in a while, you run across that little box that you have their fur in or something. And it's important, you know, if it's important to you, you know, just make sure to do what's important to you. Yes. And for example, I had the hair next to me, plus the box and all these masters like Buddha and Jesus and everybody's there. Yeah, it's going to be personal for everybody. Yes. So I know that we have you had a lot of videos about grieving. Where can we go and find your videos of grieving? Yeah. So yeah, I've done a lot of grieving videos where we're talking about grieving as a whole, as opposed to what we're talking about here, which is just, you know, the immediate aftermath. And I will link those in the description below. There's also I also have a blog post. I think it's called 12, 12 things that you can do to get over the loss of a pet or something like that. And I really need to change pet to animal, but you know, that was a long time ago. But it's, you know, it just gives you some tips on things to do and to help you. I mean, we've I've done a lot of those. I'm sure we'll do a lot more on on grieving. But yeah, I will, I will post those in the district description and you can and you can look through my videos as well. You know, you could go to the videos tab on my YouTube. Okay. I'm working with find your book. Yeah, my book is called pause talking, a course in communicating with animals. And yes, we can you can find that that on Amazon and Apple books. And as far as contacting me personally, you can find me at pause talk.net. Thank you, Lisa. That's amazing. Thank you. Okay, sweetie. Well, you guys, thank you so much. I hope this has given you some of the information that you need. And looking forward to our next podcast and our next video cast, we're going to talk about once your animal is on the other side, how do you know that they're around and all of that type of stuff. So look forward to that. I look forward to seeing you again. If you are enjoying these video casts, please hit that like button and the subscribe. And if you want to be notified of other videos in the future, hit the bell. And and we appreciate you being here. And we look forward to seeing you again. So thank you, Alicia. And thank you. Bye. Bye. Bye.