 You may be familiar from your childhood with the expression sticks and stones may break my bones But words can never harm me While that's a great sentiment to share with kids as they try and get over being called names and things We all know that's really a bunch of crap right sticks and stones can hurt your bones But so can words words can hurt very badly They can also help and that's the great thing about language But but language has a tremendous impact and that's what I want to focus on in this video The impact that language has in our life and the impact of verbal communication in our lives, so Let's start by talking about the impact as it relates to naming and identity We you know that names have a tremendous impact. That's why parents spend so much time agonizing over what to name their kids right and so But but it has to do with identity and can Have a very strong impact there and not just on individuals But on what we name groups for example think about the impact of of the names that have been associated with African Americans over the years and where those kind of Names for that group have come from Who established that name and who's able to choose that name and taking the power back in those names and and the pride that went Along with that identity of any group. It's not just African Americans, but any Cultural group even you know as we look at women We don't use the expression gruel anymore like they did in the 60s He's just call have the girl do it have the you know in the office You might just so have the have the girl do it or the girls will take care of it We don't use that anymore because it has a different Meaning that name and identity has a different impact and different purpose, right? so naming as an individual and as a group can have a tremendous impact and language can Be very powerful in that regard We also look at affiliation language can signal affiliation with a group or can signal Disaffiliation with a group meaning separation from that group. So for example, we look at affiliation When someone adopts the language of a particular group, it's something we call convergence They accept that and they really that indicates that they're Desire so being a part of that group You see this a lot for example in the military the military all the branches of the military kind of had their own language Right that they use different words for specific things and they really indoctrinate people when you enter the military You were trained to use these words part of that is is for clarity when they're talking about things, but the other part is for Affiliation for that convergence. They want people to really use that language to signal that they are a part That particular branch of the military that part they're part of that unit They're kind of buying in to that affiliation as opposed to if you know There are groups that may have language that you refuse to to use that you refuse to adopt that is what we call Divergence signaling, you know a lack of affiliation. I am not a part of this group and so I'm not adopting that language So language can be very powerful in the sense of affiliation as well it can also as we don't have a great deal of power in terms of Establishing power and when we use a particular type of language We use that to express power over somebody else or to establish power over somebody else Conversely can be used for politeness language can be very Helpful in in being polite the way we choose to phrase something that really indicates kind of are we giving an order and establishing power Or are we asking for something? Are we being polite? Are we you know that so the different words that we choose can can really signal different things there? And then finally, we know that languages obviously very much a part of sexism and racism Will be choose particular language it indicates, you know sexist or racist views and so forth and where the lack of those things would identify more More evolved view of those things so sexism and racism very much connected to language and language has a very big impact on those areas Language also has an impact in terms of precision and vagueness Language can be very very precise or it can be very vague and abstract So what we think look at things like ambiguous language sometimes we choose to be Unclear and we use that as a strategy and other times where ambiguous we don't mean to be and it causes confusion But we need to be aware of that We can also look at abstraction against we can make choices regarding abstraction. There's what we call the ladder of abstraction Which you can see here and that You know one end of the ladder has very abstract language and an abstract idea of more vague The other end is more concrete detail very specific So if we look at the word war more is very abstract mean a lot of things from you know armed conflicts to the game That you play with cards and even if we just narrow down to armed conflict There's a lots of different wars, right? But if we could get more and more specific as we go down the ladder of abstraction toward that concreteness We see that we can be more specific by identifying World War two for example that excludes all the other wars and focuses on that one Still a lot there though We can be more specific by talking about D-Day or specifically the beaches at Normandy, right? So we get more and more concrete as we get to the other end of that ladder and get away from abstraction I'll get abstraction sometimes as a strategy depends on what we're trying to accomplish Sometimes we want more abstract language and other times we ought to be more concrete So we need to make appropriate choices with our language in that regard Sometimes we also use euphemism as a form of vagueness, right? It's sometimes not pleasant to talk about things like when somebody dies. It's it's it's can be Not an easy topic to address so we use words that are a little softer expressions that are a little softer We call that euphemism so instead of saying somebody died may maybe we say they passed away or they passed on They've they've gone to heaven so forth Those are euphemisms all to express the fact that somebody's no longer living but it softens that up a little bit What's our relative language if I were to ask you, you know, did you come from a small town? Some people would raise their hands and say yes, and then we would ask, you know We can ask how small a town and some people would say, you know Well, I'm from a town of only fifty thousand people and they consider that small other people would say one from a 500 people and that's obviously small but really just depends on you know If you're from that town of fifty thousand people, but that town is near a city of, you know, two million people Then it's gonna seem small right in in comparison. So language is relative or if I said, you know, I'll be there soon What does that mean soon as a relative for me? It may mean tomorrow and for you It may mean in five minutes. So language is relative can vary in that precision of vagueness as well Well, so the precision of vagueness of what we call static evaluation Which which kind of implies that something never changes that we once we have an opinion of something We assume that and a person for example, we may assume that that it never changes that person never changes But we know that's not true so we need to be cautious of saying well this person is this and Expressing that in absolutes Whereas we want to say well, you know in my opinion or last time I was around this person They were kind of like this As opposed to this this constant because very little in life is absolutely constant So we need to be cautious when we're using static evaluation We know that language also has an impact in terms of gender So there's two different approaches that people take this one is that there are significant differences in Between the genders and language. It's where you can put the idea You know this whole book that men are from Mars women are from Venus like they're so different Fundamentally different You know masculine and feminine communication are so different that they're from different worlds The other approach though says they're not that different It's more like men are from North Dakota and women are from South Dakota But there are minor differences, right? And you know in the end we the verdict is that you know We're coming more and more around to is that Gender really isn't something that is in communication isn't something that's that's hardwired into either the genders That it's more about socialization that over hundreds of years men and and you know the masculine gender have been Socialized to communicate in a certain way and the same is true for those with a feminine gender have been socialized to Communicate in a particular way, right? So But it's not really about masculine versus feminates about what have you been taught to do and how you've been socialized as a Communicator and so those differences really don't exist in you know in a hardwired sense In men women or masculine and feminine genders they exist in the way that we've been taught to communicate Which makes those differences really? More minor than than major There are things that can be overcame can be changed and have changed over time So now that we know a little bit more about the impact of language. Hopefully you'll You'll Consider that more as we use verbal communication as we consider the way that we use language specifically And and just bear in mind the impact the language have that it can be just as powerful as those sticks and stones If you have questions about The impact of language or anything else related to communication. Please feel free to email me I'd love to hear from you there in the meantime I hope that you will give great consideration to your language use and the impact that that can have as a communicator You