 You've never seen Lauren before. Oh, here I am. Lauren, what is my opinion on... Just kidding, kind of. Kind of like an old couple. So we don't party. We don't drink a whole lot. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Today is a special episode because I'm joined by my amazing girlfriend, Lauren, who is going to actually be interviewing me with your guys' questions. So if you follow me on Instagram or you follow me on Facebook, I put up a post a few days ago and said, Hey, if you could ask me any questions, what questions would those be? And then I was going to answer them. And then I asked Lauren if she wants to ask me and have a conversation about it. So here she is. So welcome to the very 800 episodes until you finally got onto the podcast. Yeah. How does that feel? Good. I can't believe it's taken me this long. Well, it wasn't something you would have been into. I don't think too long ago. I feel like it's something that you've started to get interested in. Yeah. I guess just more open to it. I never really just even thought about it before. Yeah. So I'm excited because you're going to ask their questions and I'm going to ask for your feedback as well. So it's not just going to be me speaking. So should we just dive in? Yeah, let's do it. Okay. So ask me whichever questions you want and then let's dive in. All right. So should I say the name of the person? Should we call them out or not? I mean, if you could pronounce it. I mean, there's no calling out. They're asking a question. So I don't think it's not, it's not like we're saying something bad about them. I'm going to say this first name. I think it's Corinne and she wants to know how to find friends that are supportive or aspiring for growth. Often we get advice to cut off friends who bring us down, but no one tells you where to find like-minded people with whom you can grow together. That's good. So I would say over the past few years, our friend group has changed quite a bit. Yeah, I think so. From when we first started dating, it's actually a lot different because we don't really party like we used to. We're kind of like an old couple. So we don't party. We don't drink a whole lot. We don't eat meat. We don't eat gluten. I mean, alcohol, gluten and meat pretty much cut out almost everything you could do in Austin. And then COVID cuts out all of the rest of it. So the first thing that I would say is meetup.com helps a lot. And then meetup.com is to find anything that you have interest in, volleyball. If you want to see if there's any people that are in your city that play volleyball or, you know, backgammon. If you want to play cards with people, if you want to, you know, sell stuff on the internet, there's always a group of people in your city if it's a decent-sized city that have a meetup. So if you go to meetup.com, I think you have to sign up as a member. I'm pretty sure it's free, though. And you go to meetup.com, you sign up with them and then put in whatever it is and start going to networking events. You and I both hate networking events, but we've still forced ourselves to go to them because you meet some pretty good people. You meet a lot of really weird people as well that just want to hand you the business cards and they want to get business from you for something. But I would say a lot of our friends, if you think about people who could go down the line, a lot of them came from me going to a lot of networking events, meeting people and meeting people and meeting people and then having coffee and having coffee and having coffee with a whole bunch of people. And eventually you find four or five people that are awesome. You hang out with them and then they have friends that are awesome as well. I would say that's probably the easiest way to do it. What's your opinion or what, you know, how have you met people or how have you seen me meet people since starting the podcast five years ago because our friends group has changed from people who used to party a lot to now people who are quite spiritual and also successful entrepreneurs at the same time. So what is your advice in there? You know, I think that part of this might be cliche when they talk about you need to be who you want to meet. So if you're fully become the person that you essentially want to attract, that's helpful because you're just going to naturally start to attract the people that you want to be with and it just happens naturally too. I mean, you do need to put yourself out there obviously because you're not going to just meet anybody naturally sitting at home, which I know right now it's kind of hard. But I mean, you know, when we can get out there and even like you said having those conversations online and stuff, I think putting yourself out there is important. You have to network. Yeah, it's not fun. It's pretty awkward and you're more of an extrovert than I am. Lauren's definitely more of an extrovert than I am. I prefer to just hang out at home a lot. She likes to get out a little bit more, but you know, you got to force yourself to go out and meet people because in reality it's not, it's the old cliches are usually cliches because they're true for a reason. Yeah. And that cliche is it's not what you know, it's who you know is 100% true. If we think about a lot of places that we went and people we've hung out with and things that we've gotten or stuff we may have gotten opportunities to is always because we knew somebody. And so if it's worth it to you to change your network you're going to have to get your ass up and start finding people. Yeah, I learned that in college I think because it's going to make me sound like a sorority girl, but I mean I was and one part of the reason why I joined it was because of the value in meeting people and in college that was a great opportunity to meet people and make connections. I got some of my first jobs because of my sorority sisters and the people that we knew. So I figured that out right out the gates that you just need to put yourself out there and meet people. 100%. There's no secret to it. No. Cool. What else we got? All right. So the next question is what would your best advice be to somebody who wants to quit their job and follow their passion? What do you think my advice be Lauren? You've heard me say this a lot. You've heard me talk about this much more than the average person. Just do it. Yes. That's exactly what I was going to say. Just do it. Jump. Just make the jump. You'll figure it out as you go, but definitely don't waste your time. I would say close. Just do it was exactly what I was thinking. But before you do it, make sure you have enough money because you need to live. My most viral video that I have is called why your job's a waste of your life and it talks about why if you hate your job, you should quit it. But one of the things that I think people really need to realize is don't just quit it tomorrow unless you are financially able to pay your bills because you're not going to make a whole lot of money in the next three months of a brand new business. It takes time, three months, six months, a year sometimes to make money in a business depending on what that business is, but you don't want to quit your job where you are stable at least and don't go and do something and be stressed out about money right away. So what I would recommend is quit your job when you feel like you have a certain amount saved up. So you might say when I get to $10,000 saved, I'll do it and I need to get to $10,000 by the end of this year. Like set an actual money goal, set a deadline of when it's going to happen and then leave in that time. So don't just say, oh, I want to leave my job when I get to $10,000. Give yourself a deadline of when you're going so that you can leave, but also what I would say is figure out exactly what it is that you want to do and whenever you come home, put every ounce of energy into it. So you can work from 9 to 5 and then from 6 o'clock to 11 o'clock, you can literally just go edit. And if you have kids, maybe put the kids about at 8.30 and from 8.30 until 1 a.m. You're working on your side business and I would say either when you have enough money saved or when your side business is paying your bills, is able to pay your bills. If your bills are $3,000 and you're making $3,000 a month and you feel comfortable, well now you can go ahead and leave because that 40 or 50 hours you're spending at work, imagine if you put that into your new job. So you know how much I hate the rat race and you know how much I hate normal society and the stuff that we've been taught. So what is, I'm curious with you about my perspective of what I say to people and the way that I live my life but also the way that I talk to people. We have friends that I want to quit my job and I want to do this. So what is your perspective of my perception? Your perception of my perspective I think is what I said. What I say to people and advice maybe I've given before too. I think it's obviously shifted. This has been a bigger message that I shared after I took that leap so it always resonated with me because I knew that you just have to make that jump and commit to it. Before that though it would have seemed like completely out there and you know I was in a place where I felt like I had worked really hard to be where I was in my career and so leaving that behind felt like I was truly leaving something that I had worked so hard for but now that I'm on the other side of it it was just part of my journey and it was totally necessary for me to have all of those jobs and meet all of those people and all those opportunities but I think it's a great perspective because as much as I appreciate all those experiences I would never turn back because I've gained so much as an individual and I've learned so much and I have so much more confidence and I mean just the personal growth that I've gotten from making that jump was huge So to be clear you used to work for a company up until three years ago when we decided we wanted to go travel so you worked for a social media company and you worked for some helped with marketing but then you also worked for you know basically agencies and stuff like that advertising agencies and by the time that you had left you were making $65,000 a year single woman which is a lot of money to the average person in America the average dual income house makes about $60,000 in America so you were making more than that obviously taxes were then taken out of it and leaving scared the crap out of you but you had to if we were going to travel the world for six months which is what we did which was setting that deadline and like that goal like it had to be done and I helped push in that yeah a lot I needed that push but it was exactly what I needed it was great and I like literally would never turn around now like you could never go back to working I literally was telling a friend this other night I have nightmares that somebody tells me I have to go and sit in an office and it's horrible I just couldn't there's no way you can it's like I told you once you get outside of the bubble of working for someone else you're like I can never do that again and here's the thing you're making way more than you were right now working for yourself traveling you know we're about to leave two days from now to go to Florida for a month that would have never been an opportunity in the past and you make more money doing it which is what's awesome but you have to get to the point where you're just like you got to burn the ships you just have to do it there's no other option a lot of people too were like if I could just match my salary that would be great and I remember thinking the same thing if I'm able to at least just match my salary I'll be happy and the amount of time it took me I matched my salary within a year and that was while we were also traveling all around the world for six months of that so if I would have cut out the six months of traveling and been literally just heads down I sure matched my salary in less time than that and then after that it just grew exponentially not you know waiting for anybody to give me a raise or any of that stuff it was just purely because I decided I wanted to make more money how did I need to pivot what I needed to do on my own so love it you can never go back what else do you have so the moral of the story to answer it is just do it figure out a way to make it happen give yourself a deadline figure out how much money you need to be making or how much money you need to have saved just do it alright so what would you say to a 20 year old college student looking to become self dependent for income and fulfillment drop out of college just kidding kind of depends on what you do drop out of college or don't drop out of college if it's a specialized thing then don't drop out of college if it's something like business administration which is what I was doing just drop out and do something that has to do with business is what I would say but I would say the other thing that I would say is work for Cutco because Cutco really helps me out at 20 years old as well because I was making more selling knives than my teachers where they were teaching me which was a cool thing and that was my first experience of being entrepreneur because I was able to run my office I was able to be in charge of my income it was basically 100% commission so I was in charge of how much money I made but you know I went from delivering pizzas to people's houses and making like $17,000 a year to within 18 months making $177,000 working for them so it could be Cutco, it could be selling solar, it could be any form of sales is what I would recommend if somebody can get into sales there's a reason why they say sales people are never out of a job is because the company always needs a great sales person so if somebody can get really good at sales at 20 years old they're set I would also say that starting your own business sales is absolutely 100% necessary so it's the foundation of your own business you know even for you you're not really like picking up the phone and cold calling people or anything like that but there are sales tactics that are when you're presenting a quote to somebody that you have to go over so at 20 years old I would say if you're passionate about what you're doing staying in school if you're trying to figure out what you're doing I am of the belief that school is not the place to figure it out I think the real world is the place to figure it out a lot of people are like go to college and figure it out bullshit take that exact amount of money and go to every single conference that you possibly can for a year that interests you pay half the amount of money meet people who are already making $500,000 a year selling widgets online and you're like fuck college I could sell widgets online and make out of the average American whatever it is go to a conference that interests you meet people who are in that industry that's where I would want to meet people I wouldn't want to go and meet other people who are also broke college students like myself right so if I were to go back at 20 years old I would still sell Kiteco which is you know I sold labs in people's houses but I would do is I actually would have dropped out of college sooner and taken all the money that I was putting into college and I would have gone to as many events as possible I would have gone to you know online events I would have gone to sales I would have gone to you know music events events not music like go and see someone perform live but go and figure out the music industry and meet people who work for Fender or Gibson and all of those and figure out what I wanted to do because once again it goes back to who you know not what you know and if you know a lot of people that earn those industries and you meet somebody at 20 years old that's 35 years old making a quarter million dollars a year selling widgets online and they want to mentor you just because they like you and they see something in you you're going to be 10 times more successful 10 times faster so that would be my quick tip what about you what would you say well the second part to that was not just income but fulfillment so that I think kind of also can you know what if sales isn't for sure fulfilling for them sales is not easy sales stocks that's why it pays a lot so that's the first thing I don't know if it's fulfilling but but it does teach you a lot teach you a lot about communication teaches you a lot about persuasion teaches you a lot about how to run a business because essentially if you're a sales person you're a business running your own business inside of a business but going to fulfillment yeah you should be doing something that you want to do you know and there's a lot of people that go to college because their parents tell them they should go to college and they're in a degree trying to get a degree that they don't even truly want one of two things a lot of times number one they know they can make a lot of money doing it and if you ever just go after money you're not going to love what you do or number two their parents are telling them they should do that and so if you are in that situation I would say it's better off that you figure out what you're actually passionate about take a year off if you need to like my mom said something to me when she basically helped me drop out of college she kind of talked me into it she goes well school is always going to be there like you can go back next year if you want and I was like yeah you're right so let me drop out my mom helps me drop out which was kind of one of the cool things but she said school will always be there you can always go back and so if you take a year off and just discover who you are or save up and go travel you know a lot of people figure out what they want to do when they're traveling you know I would have never moved to Austin had I never gone and traveled you know quit my job backpacked for three months gone around the world and then come here and then meet people that kind of spark the idea of oh I should do some stuff online you know so it's kind of like the dots connected because of all that so maybe you're traveling is part of it do something that you truly want to do figure out how to edit videos and put them on youtube make a podcast just start trying things I think that's it right just try things if you don't know what brings you fulfillment 100% but you probably do know you just think that you can't make money doing it right but right and people make money in the craziest ways I mean I make money in a crazy way if you think about it right like when I first started this podcast would you ever have thought it got to this point well yeah really when I was when I was when I was inside of my room rented I started this podcast in my bedroom rented in a bedroom of a room that I rented from my friend inside of his house with this microphone and now I just have another one so you thought that you you thought that it could have been to this point I thought it was possible did I think it was 100% for sure going to happen I mean I don't think that I really had any expectations around it I just knew it was something you wanted to do so I was like yeah go for it but you know I'm not surprised you know just because I I guess for me like I've seen how hard you've worked for so long and you know I've seen the dedication and so it's not surprising to me at all yeah well thanks alright are we moving on to the next let's see what else we got alright so what are some other personal development podcasts you recommend Lauren what's the only other podcast that I ever listen to Joe Rogan we listen to Joe Rogan sometimes we listen to Joe Rogan clips we don't actually listen to his entire whole thing what do I listen to so give everybody the breakdown of how our morning usually goes at least the first I usually wake up first you come downstairs you have Toby in your hands because Toby sleeps next to you yeah so Toby and I come downstairs to find you listening to Ram Dass already you lay out the blanket to camouflage your lap so that Toby doesn't think that you're you but you're just like a nice little fluffy bed because otherwise you won't like with you tea and just listening to Ram Dass that's it so I don't listen to it's funny because as somebody who has a podcast I don't listen to a whole lot of podcasts I only listen to Ram Dass because I guess I don't want to say like I've because it's definitely not true I've learned everything with personal development but I've been in it for so long I feel like I you know and I've made 100 episodes like I already know what someone's going to say or I have a pretty good idea of what they're talking about so I'm not really into personal development or business podcasts what I'm into at this point is spirituality and learning more about it and Ram Dass is just the person for me because Ram Dass is extremely analytical because he was a Harvard professor and then he was kicked out of Harvard for giving LSD to his students back in the 60s and then he went on this crazy spiritual route so he can be very spiritual but also very analytical and kind of ties it together he's not everyone's cup of tea but I mean he's got 175 episodes I started listening to him like 6 months ago and I've done every single one of them so for me it's just what I listen to in the morning because it kind of sets my mind right to thinking that there's more out there than just going and being successful and making money and running a business but more being connected to all that there is so that's it for me we listen to Joe Rogan clip sometimes sometimes we're on a long drive we listen to Joe Rogan but more than anything else it's Ram Dass and Ram Dass only yeah Ram Dass on a daily basis for sure Ram Dass here and now is what it's called so that's what I listen to he also keeps it real like he's not trying to I don't know I mean sometimes you feel like spiritual teachers can be so I don't know like not as relatable in some cases but that's not the deal with Ram Dass at all he's also really good about it for me personally I'm sure that's an appeal for you whenever he talks about his dad sometimes he says he has a shit eating grin he just keeps it real in that way where he's like oh he isn't too out there most of the time he can get out there though what else we got alright so they said I'm having trouble with procrastination since the beginning of the pandemic I used to be an active person but these days I'm I guess they're not from America but I'm wrecked to do everything sounds awkward coming from me I'm sure it sounds better with an accent what would you do to become an active person again what do you think let's go for you first what tips would you give somebody to be active again you know I think it would be kind of about coming up with a plan so they're in a pattern because everything got crazy and there's just a shift and so now they're in that loop but if they decided I want to do X, Y and Z and they came up with a daily plan on how to fit that into their schedule and maybe have an accountability buddy to like say hey we're gonna you know I need you to be somebody who reminds me or holds me accountable to getting this done and then just keep knocking it out daily they probably don't have a plan they probably aren't good at time management those are the two things I can think of and they probably don't have a why behind why they want to do it the way you do one thing is the way you do everything so if you're slacking in your routines, you're slacking in your everything, literally your business, your finances your relationships, you're being a parent the way you do one thing is the way you do everything and if something really matters to you you'll get it done you'll always get it done, 100% if I were to tell everybody here that they had to do XYZ or everybody that they love dies by tomorrow they'll get whatever XYZ is done they'll figure out a way to get it done and the reason why is because there's just enough importance behind it so if you feel like you're stuck and you're not doing what you need to do main reason why probably is because you don't have a strong enough why you don't know the reason so if you're like oh my body's gone to shit since COVID hit well you probably don't care enough about your body and you need to think to yourself well how why is it worth me why is it worth for me to take time out of my day to work on my body right if your reading has gone to shit well it's probably because the same thing you don't care enough about your reading so what would what would your life look like if you read every single day for the next five years what where would you be five years from today and start thinking about that and then your why become stronger if you're you know if we're going back to the body if you're overweight and you're trying to lose weight well don't think about you losing weight but think about the fact you're trying to stay around to like your daughter down the aisle right like that type of stuff is what motivates people so if someone's sitting around and they're completely unmotivated they don't have anything that motivates them they need to number one figure out their why what is your why behind the thing that you want to do number two you need to come up with a plan number three you just got to freaking execute right in the way that you execute is when you don't feel good what I always say is inaction causes more inaction if you're sitting on the couch scrolling on Instagram you're not going to it's harder to get up when you're scrolling on Instagram than it is if you're already up and moving action creates more action inaction creates inaction so if you're laying on the couch trying to get motivated just get up and do 15 push-ups do 50 jumping jacks go for a run around the block even though you don't want to move your freaking feet and when your heart rate gets up and your blood starts pumping you start to get endorphins in your body well then that little bit of action creates more action the worst thing you could do is sit on the couch and just keep thinking because thinking has never gotten anybody anywhere thinking with some action has gotten people to where they need to go so I would just say have a why develop a plan take action yep I agree you concur great okay so Scotty wants to know when should I know when to cut someone out of my life and how do I do that properly so if you're already thinking that you want to cut someone out of your life they probably already should be out of your life it's a pretty good chance this is tricky because it depends on who the person is if they're in your family it's not very easy to cut someone out of your family now it is possible to cut somebody out I made a video about toxic people not too long ago in how if somebody is toxic they should be gone they should be out of your life and if they talk down to you if they make you feel bad about yourself if they try to hold you down they make you feel worse of a person whatever it is they need to be gone they're just not worth your time now what if that's one of your parents what if that's your sister what if that's your aunt or uncle but I said if somebody brings you down enough to the point where they're messing up your future and your present you have to figure out if they're worth staying in your life or not and a lot of people like but my mom did XYZ for me and I understand that I get it but at the same time you know just because that doesn't mean you deserve to live a life of misery with someone who makes you feel like shit like there is no reason to be around someone who makes you feel like shit once you turn 18, 20 years old you can get people out of your life that don't serve you anymore and that's the fact of the matter and I do you want to that's up to you and when I put that out there a bunch of people were like oh yeah but if they were able to not talk to their dad again or not talk to their mom if you saw some of the messages that I've gotten from people of what their parents have done or do to them currently you'd be disgusted with people you'd be like they should absolutely 100% not talk to that person ever again the things that people have been through the physical abuse, mental abuse sexual abuse that people have been to and you're telling me that they should just continue to put themselves through that because here's the deal if they have trauma from the past from that person every moment that they see them and every moment that their subconscious takes over and they're just sitting around doing nothing so if your life is worth it to you at some point in time you have to go alright this person might need to go and how to get rid of them you don't have to get rid of people right away but you can slowly start to get people out of your life it's possible you don't have to get people out of your life 100% but if someone's in your life 95% right now can you go to 90 and can you go to 85 and then 80 75, 60, 50 and then get them down to 5 or 10 your life is just going to be so much easier when you open it up now you have more time for people like we talked we started off the episode who inspire you, who bring you up who talk amazing about you who say good things who make you feel better about yourself and at that point in time when you have that confidence coming from the people that you surround yourself with then you can go out and do whatever it is that you want to in the world what are your thoughts I have a lot of thoughts I feel like part of it is that your happiness is your responsibility and so you have to fully take responsibility of owning what you allow in your life and also like I'm going to sound a little woo wooy but you have to protect your energy and if it's a matter of someone that you can't just remove from your life 100% start to set boundaries for yourself and become familiar with what that looks like and how you can keep boundaries in place to protect your energy because that's going to be really important too for sure set boundaries if you're going to stay around somebody at least figure out what the boundaries are and if you guys want to see this if you guys want to see me and Lauren talking and listening on the podcast you can always go to my youtube and you can look at the video that will be uploaded so you can see both of us you've never seen Lauren before here I am hey if you're enjoying this video do me a favor and hit that like button down below it helps with the youtube algorithm so that more people can see this message because it helps us get it out organically so hit that like button and I appreciate you alright did you ever face any challenges when it came to trying to communicate effectively with other people be it personally or professionally if so how slash what did you do to overcome those challenges p.s. I gained so much valuable insight from your podcast they have helped me so much thank you for doing what you do how sweet Lauren what is my opinion on being professional and professionalism emails and speaking professional I don't think you really want that much to do with it what I agree you're not into writing emails especially like the hi Nancy hope you had a great weekend how's the fam any of the small talk that's just definitely not going to happen no an email is just if you write an email it's going to be straight to the point just basic info no frilly nothing I mean I think that with you you're just very much yourself which is good because obviously you're authentic but it tends to be blatant and just like direct to the point yeah I think you just get the real Rob all the time yeah I would say that it's just you know I've never Lauren Lauren took communications in college graduated from college in communications she did PR and she did this stuff she knows how to write the perfect emails and I remember for a while you would see what I would do and be like that's not a good email I was helping you write emails at one point you were because I was like does this sound right because I don't even care to put the time into being fake because I just don't like and that's one of the things that people say like if they're listening to my podcast or they meet me in person or they see my videos or they're inside of one of my courses they're like you're literally the same person all the time and that's just because I just don't see any reason to be somebody else so the best tip I would give somebody is if you got to be professional be professional but don't ever not be yourself yeah that's what I would say because there's a lot of people that are in business that are complete like there's a lot of people that are in my business that you could literally that are in person development or podcasting and you could you know the mic turns on and there's somebody else turns off and they're a completely different person and you've met people and you're like who the hell like how is that person yeah I don't enjoy that yeah and so for me it's just like I don't I don't care about constructs enough human constructs made up by people that are no smarter than you and I and dealing with them enough to change who I am so for me I'm gonna give the answer that nobody really was expecting or wanted to hear I don't really care to be business professional too often like is there times yes there is some time and stuff but I don't I think that one of the things that people really do those is they give up part of themselves to be what everyone else wants them to be and that's in business but it's also in like normal life people just they aren't fully 100% authentic to who they are and then 10 years down the road they don't even know who they are anymore because they've been somebody else for other people because they care about other people's perceptions and judgments of them too much and I think if you start to go down that road it can get pretty hairy where you start to lose yourself because you're trying to be someone else for other people and you know in my opinion I might be the worst and e-mailer in the world but it's just because I just don't care to be that way and that's the good thing about running your own business is you don't have to I can hire somebody to send emails for me that's the other great thing about it is when you have your own business you don't have to act a certain way if you are in a business and you work for a company you got to do what your boss tells you to do so figure out whatever that is try to be as authentic as you can inside of that construct of a business and if you got to say hope you had a great weekend before you actually get to the real freaking point of the whole e-mail you know what when I say that to people it's because I genuinely hope they did but I will say this so even though that isn't part of what you do there's the other side of professionalism in terms of respecting people's time and you do that making sure you're providing value to the people that you're working with never asking for something if you're not going to be able to provide value and exchange evenly that type of a thing you have all that down you're just basically saying I'm not going to add fluffy unnecessary stuff to our communication but you're very respectful of people's time you're always on time all of that kind of stuff that's important and you do stick to that and we're only talking about e-mails at this point too there's also the other thing of when you're communicating with somebody verbally and the way that you communicate with someone verbally and I just fully believe in authenticity and even if you don't act the way you're quote-unquote supposed to in business I think that just being yourself will get more people's respect even if that person is a higher up than you in your business or in your company or whatever it is I try to be as respectful as I can for people's time Lauren knows I hate being late it literally drives me insane it gives me like an anxiety attack to be late like stresses me out because like when I was raised by my mom every clock was a different time between 5 to 10 minutes ahead so if you shut up on time you know that you were between 5 to 10 minutes early so when it comes down to being respectful of people's time all of that stuff there's also just like I feel like when you get to a certain point in business like you're a CEO of a company you kind of just want to be around more real people because there's so many ass-kissers in your company and I think that sometimes when you are more real and very respectful people just connect with that and they notice a part of themselves in it as well I notice that the most CEOs or some of the most successful people that I know are not like business type people right they don't speak business it's kind of like the people that have managers above them are the ones that have to be business so that the managers don't judge them or get mad at them for it they don't see suite of companies usually they're not businessy at all they're usually the least businessy out of the entire company they do whatever the hell they want they talk however they want because they know that they can be themselves because nobody's going to fire them so I don't know it's just an interesting thing to think about as far as like who you actually truly are and who you want to be and show up for other people yep stop listening stop reading stop learning I had an episode years ago that was called stop what was it called stop studying start training I think it was something along those lines where it's just like sometimes it's like it's like it's like it's just like sometimes we trick ourselves to think that we're being productive when in reality we are learning too much right like I even I mean besides like a couple parts of books I haven't read a book in a couple years and the reason why is because I don't not because I don't need to read books but because they're not at this point in my life serving me for what it is I'm trying to do and there was a point that I realized that I was reading too much and I was watching too much and learning too much and I wasn't taking enough action and a lot of times I think a lot of people will will mask their fear for instance they'll mask their fear of rejection or their fear of failure with I'm not ready yet so I need to keep learning so then what they do is they don't take any action so they tell themselves I need to read another book I need to go get another degree another certification another thing to put up on the wall that tells me that I'm good enough but in reality you don't need to do any of that stuff anymore you don't need to read any more books you don't need to listen to any more podcasts you don't need to do any of that stuff what you need to do is you just need to get your your butt up in the morning and start working as hard as you possibly can for whatever it is that you want so there's a point where you have to ask yourself am I just wasting my time learning at this point when I should be taking action and I mean I have I know some people that make crazy amounts of money that are ex-cons they never went to college they never graduated high school but they have hard core work ethic they learn what they need to learn they get around the right people and then they work harder than anybody else and I have one person specific I'm not going to say who it is but he's an ex-con he makes probably a hundred million dollars a year he didn't graduate high school he doesn't take action he's up you see him every single day on his instagram stories 5am at the gym not sleeping in 5am at the gym then he goes to work and you know people are like oh man I love to have his life with the Rolls Royce and with the crazy house in LA and with the private jet and all of those things but sometimes you have to just go do I need to stop reading do I need to stop listening to podcasts and figure out how to actually do things right I had in my course where I teach people how to grow coaching businesses I had somebody say yesterday inside of the Facebook group she said how do we deal with the no sale that it comes in because I'm starting to feel down about myself about this no sale I just had I've had more no sales in my career of selling stuff than I've had sales LeBron James has missed more shots than he's made you know if you're an incredible basketball player you miss 55% of your shots if you're like the best you miss 55% which means you miss more than you make if you're one of the best baseball players in the world you strike out 70 to 75% of the time that you're at bat right like you have to realize you have to miss shots you have to screw up in order to make shots and it's like Wayne Gretzky says you miss 100% of shots you don't take if you're sitting around and learning too much to this point you're not taking shots you're watching film right like the best basketball players and you know the best basketball players watch film they watch every single game they learn they get better but if you're not going out on the court you're basically just watching film all the time and you can't get better just by watching film it's a required part of becoming successful but you gotta get on the court you gotta screw up you gotta learn how to dribble you gotta miss some shots in order to make sure you get your shots right so what I would say is stop learning for the next two months and then just take hardcore action towards whatever it is you need to do yeah you like that? I like that do you have anything to add to that? I don't think I have anything different I mean really it's like sometimes I feel like the lessons and things that I've learned have taken on a whole new meaning once I've actually had to put them into practice like when I'm actually faced with a challenge then it's like I reach into my toolbox and I'm like this is when I really need to pull out this and before you know reading it or hearing about it it all sounds great but until you're actually faced with having to use those tools it's just going to be an idea that's all cool and stuff but yeah I mean you'll have a much deeper understanding of everything you're learning once you're putting it into practice it means so much more yeah you just have to jump in love it alright what's next hey Rob I run a production company creating content for people and businesses I find myself procrastinating due to constant doubts of my age and if all of this time I'm putting into work will be worth it in the long shot I'm 20 I of course know that there will be that it will be worth it but that doesn't stop my mentality from dragging me to a halt do you have any practices I should adopt in order to combat these thoughts that destroy my productivity well it's more self it's self doubt is all that it really is which everybody has self doubt your self doubt happens to be in your age so when I started my first business in Cutco I was 20 when I first started interviewing people for the position I was 20 years old and I was interviewing people 20 25 30 40 sometimes 60 years old and and I remember people would come in and I would they'd go through an interview and they'd be interviewed with me and they'd be a good fit and they'd be like hey I just have a problem with the fact that you're 20 years or 40 years younger than me and you're going to be my trainer and this was 2000 2006 2007 2008 so LeBron James is like 21 22 at the time right so but he was still pretty much the best basketball player that was out there and so people came in and they were like you know I have a problem with the fact that I'm going to be learning from you and you're so much younger than me I don't know if you have experience and I said okay well you know I have a question for you if LeBron James came in here right now it's 22 years old and said hey Lauren I want to teach you how to play basketball would you go you're not old enough I only learn from people that are my age and they're like no of course not and I go they're like why I asked them why and they're like well because it's the best basketball player in the world and I look in the eyes and I'd say yeah I'm one of the best in the world too so do you want to work with me or not because I really don't care and when you're that real with people people are like oh shit this person's like like people you can tell when someone's serious about something so I don't care what somebody does at 20 years old but there's some people that I know they're 20 years old that are crushing it as CEOs at their own companies and they have you know I know somebody who's 20 years old and they have like 20 employees but nobody looks at them and like oh no I'm not going to work with them because they're younger than me so I think it comes down to confidence more than anything else of how to actually believe in yourself and for this podcast I was 28 years old and I thought to myself like who's going to want to get life advice and mindset advice from a 28 year old what 40, 45, 50, 60 year old would want to listen to a 28 year old and it kept me from making the podcast for about 5 months and then I was just like I'm going to do it and if somebody wants to listen to me they can you know now I'm 34 years old but if you look at the demographics of this of who listens to this my largest age group is 25 to 44 like 60% of people who listen to this podcast are 25 to 44 which means there's people that are 10 years older than me that are listening to this podcast there's also people that are in groups and courses that I've done and they're 50, 60, 70 years old and they've gotten something from it but what I think it comes down to is how humble somebody is to go age is nothing but a number because you could be 20 years old and have 4 years of experience at something 5 years of experience at something my business partner that I have that we're making a t-shirt company he was a millionaire by 17 years old you're going to go oh no I don't want to learn from a 17 year old on how to make money when you have $500 in the bank and he's got a million or you're going to put yourself and be humble and go yeah maybe I should put my tail between my legs and learn from this person it could be about making money, it could be business it could be spirituality we've all got issues where we're holding ourselves back yours is just disguised your insecurities are hiding themselves and not being old enough we've all got our insecurities in different ways sometimes it's not pretty enough not smart enough not old enough whatever it is we all disguise in some sort of way and this one just happens to be age so age doesn't matter doesn't matter how old you are and the one thing that I remember my boss telling me when I was younger is he said just outwork everybody because if you work harder than anybody else you'll get everyone's respect I was like alright cool so I just tried to outwork every single person I could because people respect somebody who works really hard like people respect somebody who works really hard because most people can't drive themselves to do it so that alone shows that you're different than the average person so that's my thoughts on it I mean it's crazy because it happens on both sides of the spectrum I've talked to people who are you know in their 60s and 70s and they're like why would anybody listen to me I'm just this old person and so I mean it's like you said it's just an idea that people have come up with in their own head based on fear or their self-doubt whatever limiting belief it is that they're holding but we talked about this earlier too about if you were to ask yourself who out there needs my help and like there's people who really need what it is that you have to offer and like with you for instance you were having some doubts about starting the podcast because Tony Robbins like he's out there killing it, been doing it for years why is there space for Rob Dial and so you know for anybody who's listening to this who's been impacted by the podcast or anything that you've done you know they wouldn't have been if you would have continued down that thought process so you know there's people out there that really need what you have to offer and your limiting beliefs are holding you back are holding them back from getting your help which means you're being selfish because you have value that you could give the world but you're too busy thinking about yourself and your own insecurities to not give it to them which means you're selfish well it's also just temporary discomfort right because you're going to start to do something and it's going to become second nature and you will have you know cross that bridge and it'll become easier I mean there was a point in time where you hated talking on camera and you didn't necessarily like doing it and it was awkward and weird but that's not the case anymore I know now we got two cameras looking nice right now so yeah it's also just temporary discomfort that you will get past it's well worth it for all the people that you're going to end up helping in the long run so everybody likes talking in front of camera when they first do I'm sure I'm going to hate this when I see it you're not even going to let you look at it because you're going to hate it so much I'm not going to like the way it sounds the way it looks but it's like you know whatever you just got to let it happen yeah it'll be fine let's do one more what's the best one that you have there oh this is the last one and it's the best one okay perfect okay so if this was your last day on earth what two meals what I have and where would they be that's so funny that you said two because I know that there's two that it would be and I don't know which one if you had to pick one I couldn't pick one so you got to tell us what two there would be both of them are in Italy one is in Florence and one is in Rome so there's the best pizza on the planet at a place called El Pizziolo and it's amazing and that's in Florence so that's for sure one of them I would get the diavola it has meat on it it has dairy it has gluten it has all of it all of the things that I don't eat it has I don't eat gluten it has gluten I don't eat dairy it has dairy I don't eat meat it has meat but if it's my last day on earth I would just have to do it the other one is the carbonara that come on you got it oh no I know the name of it da Enzo so if you guys ever go to Florence or Rome you have to go if you're in Rome it's a place called daenzo d a space e n z o it is the best food hands down I've ever had in my entire life we've eaten all over the world and their carbonara is mind blowing it's insane how good it is I did not know food it's funny because when you get to Italy you don't know how that food could be so good and then when you get to daenzo you didn't know that it could be even better and so we've been there we've been to Rome probably seven times together how many times do you think we've eaten at daenzo I don't know how many times we've eaten there we've eaten there multiple nights in a row oh yeah for sure because it's worth it I mean it's the kind of place where you wait outside for potentially an hour we've waited over an hour to get in there and we are happy to wait every single time because it is so worth it it's amazing and then the other place is called il pizza yolo pizza yolo pizza yolo and that's in Florence and we always get the diavola and it's hands down the best pizza ever it's got that really fresh basil on it it's just a whole different story because basil in Italy is like everything else in Italy it's just amazing we've literally gone and taken trips to Rome and Florence just to eat at those two places so those would be the two places if it was my last day on earth I would start in Rome I would wake up oh here we go there's another one I just thought about it you want to know the answer to this one too we would wake up in Rome and then what would I do a mecanismo a cappuccino and a croissant for sure it's a place called mecanismo that is in Trastevri which is in Rome it's a neighborhood in Rome I would get 100% a cappuccino and then I would get two croissants I would get their croissants then I guess if we're already there we'd have to have lunch there so we'd go and get the carbonara then we'd have to take the speed train an hour and a half north to Florence then I would have the diavolo pizza at Pizziola and then I would die happy because that would be the best day of food ever sure I'm so hungry and now I'm just dreaming and it's almost August bless you it's going to be one more everybody oh I think we're good it's basically three every single time usually so yeah it's August we were supposed to be in Italy for a month all of April until so COVID thing hit if we can't go in April I guess we'll go in October don't know if that's going to happen our two months that we usually travel to Rome doesn't look like it's happening we'll go the second we'll be able to go back to Italy Rob and Lauren will be on the plane