 All right, let's play some full here a sound You have no idea what it's like to be a card See these horrors Do nothing You have no idea what it's like to be a card. All right. All right, so hold on. Let me make this in closer. There you go. I would probably I Know we're going back and forth on this but he's just on the edge of that eye I think it will probably be okay to bring him in just a bit more Just getting just to the eyes actually fully in there. Just kind of uncomfortable unless you would go Something like this, but again, it just feels slightly Uncomfortable there. So I would just bring him in just a bit more and it helps and then and if you want to get out of this Responsibility even more no idea while this whole shot is happening You could have like a slight slight pan over You know, I mean that could be something that could be done afterwards with the camera Now animation wise there are two things You have no idea what it's like to be a card There's something where like the mouth is it's just a bit too turn the sign off It's it's very broad in terms of when he talks in terms of How Low hello, can you go like how far down you go with the jaw? Especially when you come back up to end on the linear key it just makes it very poppy and chattery same thing here you open and It actually I never animated with this guy. This feels more like a translate than a rotate But it's still it's it's fairly broad And especially here it gets into very poppy things when you have something this wide and then closes over one frame And it's the same thing here like this. This just gets really big. This is more like Someone yelling but given his energy like you're like within like This and halfway this realm And again, you just especially something that probably you don't want to go down and hit the linear key Especially here it gets really fast and poppy like this is a one-frame pop And again, it's just maybe suppose the envelopeing, but it just looks like it's a translate versus a rotate It's kind of weird It just goes too Too far in the up and down and then the other thing is it seems very hiccupy and what the chest and the head are doing I get this Actually through here and you can track the nose if I go Onion skinning here and I know there's a rotation in the head as well. So it's not Just the body here. Oops. That was That was some lazy tracking on my end You can see here just the way This is so boring to watch That's something you have to do on your end as well Track all this and you can kind of see The speed changes and kind of the up and downs Oh that knows it just gets very messy and dirty and it's same thing here And sometimes it's more visible when you scrub for you as you test and you go fast. You can see it too But for instance here As that nose goes up you go up and up and then we hit that wall Now you play this in real time So that to me is the biggest thing a lot of hard edges in terms of what the head is doing Even on the down here right there You can see how Track that part with streak here My awful track you bam this really hits this invisible wall right there Other than that like I like what you have, you know in terms of Him looking down having the tremors there in the mouth How will shake there like and like no no no over with the lean and then coming back And being in there you might even Get comfortable with something like that framing wise get go even further give this cut even more of a Punching I think this might be too much could almost do it Between these two Just really pushed out, you know, and then you get to see all your Let's go back here your eye darts Which are really They're a bit too busy like this gets really high frequency like your darts will be dart dart dart dart And this is now pop pop pop pop pop pop pop there's so much stuff going in there So I think that's a general feel Of this submission is that it's just it's cool. I like it. There's good stuff in it. It just has a layer of dirt If that's a word to use we're just things get very messy Just arc wise and spacing wise where it just feels like there are too many keys If for something that would have you know, like some curves You suddenly have too many here keys and then something in here and then something in there and It gives it that story feel That's the biggest thing to me Other than that if you look at Let's check in here eyebrows Same thing here right through there. It gets a bit busy Where's a lot of stuff going on in the middle also generally when you have a big eyebrow moves You want to pin those outer brows? And do mostly inner and mid and a little bit up and down So if that's your brow and then let's put it here like that's your brow here, right? And then the brow goes up. It's mostly like that Where you're going to have a lot in the middle Of course the inner and then like the outside like this point can go maybe to here To pin in the big give it some fleshiness, but once you start moving everything It just feels like this big chunk of geometry Moving up and down so watch out for that too It feels better here. See here you got it but it feels better. It's mostly the inner and the middle Maybe it's just an angle thing because that's the way it's modeled It helps that this is pinned here But I would still be careful. I still see a lot of right there Don't tone that down there. Watch out at the very end You just everything this has a really sharp Stopping everything and this could be because it's visually the whole head stops Which then the eyebrow maybe supposed to pose like on the same key and then the inherits that sudden stop So I would say that is that Now let me look at the other one and bring back this sound here I'm in love with your brother-in-law. You're in love with your own brother one of the army No, your sister's husband Michael Michael. No, that's your sister's brother. No, I'm my sister's brother You're in love with me me. I'm in love with Tobias my brother-in-law That's a long clip though. So my concern for this you have 16 seconds of this where That's cool in terms of mechanics, but one of the issues is that this is straight towards camera Imagine that horse would come from here and go here. So we have more of You know the backside here and you can see one more leg A bit of a tail something something and a bit, you know part of that neck And then the head there does my horse by the way Even it comes in from the side and then and then kind of rests You know, so you're you're starting like that's your ending pose, but a bit more Over because right now you go through that and it's Like there's no more change. There's something weird that's separate here in the backside in the middle But it's mostly that and then the other guy There's good stuff in terms of how wide you go In terms of this one. It's getting back here like there's good change there But what I'm looking at this what I would do is Bring this over right in the butt over there. It's a bit more three-quarters. So we get to see the nice Full mechanics because this is almost like some guy with legs With a horse costume. I mean, you don't quite see the structure And then once Maybe till here maybe till army and then after that To me it seems like oh, okay, okay, let's Yeah, I can't zoom in and pan. So let's just do it messily like Okay More like that. No your sister's husband. I mean you could even go Even go more Michael Michael. No, that's your sister's brother. No, I'm my sister's brother. You're not with me me Then you would have to I'm in love with Tobias. You know for her ending there. Whoops. I knew that's gonna happen. This was my multiple screens here My brother, right? So for her it's mostly within that region. And if you go after him No, your sister's husband your sister's husband and then you can cut to him And he is more Michael Michael Might be tricky because how far down he goes might just be slightly adjusted But I mean if you go by thirds it might just be more like this, right? If you want to keep those my crappily drawn thirds here But if that's him Michael Michael, it would still work. See that he's still Uh, whereas my delete So that would still work framing wise. No, that's your sister's brother. No, I'm my sister Then if you go back to him, right, it would have to be More like that Now I'm my sister's brother. You're in love with me me. I'm in love with Tobias my brother-in-law So and then the other thing is it It doesn't mean that you're gonna have to cut I mean if you do this, this is a wild suggestion just because you know, you're starting to disregard or I'm throwing away half of the animation, right, but You also don't have to go back and forth whenever she is talking cut He is talking cut. There could also be a moment of Michael You know when he goes here Michael We stay on her Michael. So we just watch her listen to what that guy is saying. Anyway, just throwing that out there Because right now it seems like let's turn us the all you're off It's a lot of um talking heads and because there's nothing else going on in terms of Mechanics of a horse It's almost like this is interesting. I like it because it's fun to have you know, it's not just a human But at the same time you could also totally just do this with humans. Like what's the point of having? A horse in here, I know this is this is a silly thing because you can use any rake Why not? Why wouldn't it be two horses talking? It's always such a more interesting than because you usually see humans But the bummer is that you're using this fun rake But then we only have this in terms of body mechanics and after that it's mostly in here And I think if you're doing this and we're not seeing more Of the horse maybe turn and maybe there's something in here where the horse then rests imagine She rests her her head on this is all like bummed out like why why why am I listening to you if you're being so obtuse You know where you use the set and we can play with with the scene and she moves around and we see more with the horse mechanics If it then ends up being just talking heads, that's why I'm mentioning Well, then let's just focus on the heads then let's start cutting back and forth So you can really highlight the awesome facial animation If that makes sense. Anyway, it's I know it's a very destructive note So I'm gonna leave it at that and then you can tell me what you want to do how you want to proceed um And I think cutting would also help You know the 16 seconds of constantly one thing was imagine I mean you can take this now and just and just cut back and forth Do this play blast put that into whatever software you have and then zoom in and see how that feels when you cut back and forth Then this could be both of them Then cut to her and then cut to him and then cut to both again Anyway, like you can do a bunch of stuff and you can see how that feels and the energy is going to be higher Because you're going to see this shot go. That's cool. That's cool. Okay. Okay. We're staying with them. We're staying with them Okay, okay versus. Okay, that's cool. Okay. Okay. Oh close up. Oh another close That's funny. Oh, we're back to you know bend them both. Oh final close up in you know new acting and blah, blah, blah, blah I think that's going to keep that energy of the shot up instead of Of of staying 16 seconds with one long thing. Anyway, I'm rambling. I'm going to leave it at that Tell me what you think and we can go from there. Thanks All right, there's an email you can sign up you can start whenever you want you can submit whatever you want You get 16 submissions either way a like and subscribe would be awesome. All right. Thank you