 Hey there friends, how's it going? My name is Kevin and today we're playing similgrilagra. Alright, it's close to that. I can't remember exactly, but you'll find out soon enough. I'm pretty sure I was almost there, like 90%. It's all about invading someone's privacy by looking at their phone after they go missing. Okay, if I ever go missing, do me a favor, just don't look at my phone. Alright, some mysteries are best left unsolved. And sometimes you gotta think about the greater good for humanity. Alright, let's get started at similgrilagra, language selection, English or Irish, I would assume. We'll go with English. Oh my god, Greg, seven missed calls. Get the picture. I am not interested. It's probably like your dad or something. Oh for fuck's sake. Okay, hint, Toby's birthday. Oh my god, Jesus Christ almighty. This phone just jump-scared me. Obviously a fucking Sony. Am I right, guys? Do people hate Sony? Obviously a feckin Samsung. Alright, obviously a feckin iPhone. Okay, just pay attention to whichever one you also hate. I wanna relate to you guys. Okay, I got in somehow. I don't know, the phone's glitching out. Oh my god, take care of your notifications. This is worse than me. Actually, no, no, it's not worse than me. I have three apps on 99+, so no, I'll give you some slack. Alright, is this your Tinder? I'm looking there first. That's where I'll find the real answers. What the hell is this? This isn't Tinder. Oh my god. If you look into my eyes, you can see it looking back. Can you see it? I only see me. Is that what you're scared of? Because I would kind of understand. I don't want to take anyone else. Listen, lady, you're literally recording for your phone just called someone instead of making these over-the-top YouTube vlogs. Don't come find me. Well, thanks for joining me, folks. See you tomorrow. Oh wait, I still gotta make it to 10 minutes. Hold on. I'm coming back, but not for you. It's for me. System restore. Okay, great. Scary video has been deleted, I would hope. Is it common to have a great feck off? Stop messaging me. Is it common to just have a picture of yourself as your wallpaper? Anna, fuck this silent treatment shit. Fuck it so much. Oh my god, Greg, what is your problem? I'm gonna give you a week. A week? Okay, I wanna give you space. It really doesn't look like you're giving me space, Greg. Oh my god, all these messages. Get the picture. Jesus. Do I get to reply? You've got the wrong person. How much of an embarrassing that would be after weeks of messaging and it was a wrong number. Wait, now he thinks it's someone else. Now that I'm finally giving him a bit of sass back, he's like, oh wait, you're not actually Anna. Anna would just roll over. Okay, now he's getting defensive. In case you're unaware we are dating. She's kind of cute. Oh, that's gonna set him off. Wait, oh my god, he insulted his own girlfriend. I said she's kind of cute. And then he said, this is ridiculous. So you don't know, Anna. She's not cute at all. She's extremely ugly. Greg, you're a bit of a bastard. Oh, he wants the video. Can I say no? No, I'm not gonna. Greg, you're trouble. She's better off without you. She can do better. I'm done with this conversation. Oh god damn, he's calling me now. What kind of ringtone is this? Fine, Greg, what do you gotta say? Who the hell is this? After me. Hold on, I'm in rural Ireland. The signal's really bad. I can't really hear you. You're breaking up. Are you ignoring me? Get it. He's got angry issues. Hey, why are you not talking? The reception was bad. Take it off silent mode or something. I think I'm talking to a boomer, guys. I think Greg might be a boomer. Oh, I got a match on Tinder. Hold on. Oh my god, she is over, Greg. Look at this. They're all talking. I'm putting them all on the cold shoulder. I'm talking to you here. I'm going to ignore that one. Let's take a look at the one who just messaged me. Message corrupted. Oh wait, select the words in the correct order to rebuild the message. You see, your first instinct would be a come on, not even a pity laugh, but me, an intellectual, would say, not even pity come on a laugh. Okay, that's not accepted as an answer for some reason. I said I'm not Anna right now. He's saying role playing. I like it. You don't understand. I'm not actually her. Oh wait, okay. Actually, I'm going to encourage this. I'll be your nurse for tonight. Sorry, your blood pressure is really high. I'm going to have to take you to the hospital. I've called an ambulance. I'm calling him out. I'm saying your jokes are terrible, but really it's just projecting onto other people what I feel about myself. I'm kind of done with this guy. Can I do anything else on this phone? Oh my god. Why is he so needy? Wait, what is Toby's birthday again? I can't remember. Oh, now he's asking who's Greg, her husband. I'm going one step further. Then he's getting pissed off. You're going to dig a little deeper. Is her email open? Why am I even talking to this dude? Jesus Christ, Greg. You're scaring the Jesus out of me. What do you want now? Hello? Oh my god. I know you're there. She actually can do so much better than you, Greg. You're such a little... Fack off. I'm done with him. I actually hate him. I don't hate a lot of people. This is video log number one. Oh, she's a YouTuber. Pathetic. Is this supposed to be therapeutic? Okay, that was an awful vlog. I'm not liking or subscribing. I told Greg I don't really care about his trauma. And he's saying that I'm still here, so that says something. So now I'm going to say about Taylor on Tinder over there. Now he's pissed. Oh, now he's very pissed. How fast does this guy type? God damn. He may be psychotic, but that is kind of impressive. Okay, so Toby's her cat. So I just need to find out her cat's birthday, which should be simple. And then I can access her emails. All right, let's take a look. People take pictures of their cats. Camera. Oh, there's a little cat. Eighth of July. Eighth of July. Okay, make it more about the cat. Less about you. No one wants to see you. They want to see the cat again. Please. The cat's not even in focus there. Oh, a match. Oh, yeah, I got distracted again. Hold on. I should keep swiping. Oh, another match. Jesus, things are really going well for Amanda. You know, apart from the whole missing, possibly kidnapped or dead thing. I found a birthday one. Yay. How do I do this? I do not understand what is going on here. What are we supposed to do? Okay. Randomly clicking on things saves the day once again. Okay. Eighth of July. Perfect. We've gotten the cat's birthday. Never thought I would care about a cat's birthday, but yet here we are. When it comes to invading people's privacy, then I care. Why is Taylor so obsessive between him and Greg? This woman probably ran away herself. No wonder she would say, don't find me in that video message. These people would drive you nuts. I'm going to talk to other people. Explore Amanda's options for her. Hey, cool name. Where'd you get it? I hated my previous name. Changed it. Can't be that bad. What was it before? Anus. You're funny. Wait. No, that's actually my name though. Call me Anus. Now that I've successfully wasted his time, I'm going to say not interested. Help, I'm a complete time waster. That's it. I'm done. You have been reported for a negative attitude. I like how he decided that's it. I'm done. I don't want you anymore when I clearly neglected him. She even looking for love. Shouldn't I be looking for an Anna? Kind of ignoring the important thing here. Welcome to Faris and Kane, your personal shopper directory. God, that's creepy. Press one to request for a shopper. Yeah, dress me please. I have absolutely no fashion sense. I'm wearing a whiskey t-shirt. Please help me. Press one for robes and cloaks. Yeah, I could use a cloak actually. Please hold. Ah, that's nice. I love video games that put you on hold. Ah, yes. Hold music. My second favorite genre. Only second to royalty free music. They're one and the same really, I guess. Ah, forgetting another loop of it. How nice. Ah, that's good. This song slaps too. Wouldn't mind breaking out a dance. You know, I won't break out a dance for that. I wrote a blog post a while ago about why I f***ing hate video games. Because this is what it does. It appeals like the male fantasy. Yeah, alright. Okay, this is a fun game. Okay, moms and whatever moods again. I don't want to talk to you. What am I supposed to do now? I'm kind of at a dead end. Let's edit my profile on Sparrow. I'm switching back to Anus. My age is 12. How could I make all those people who have matched with me into predators? Then I'm going to call the cops. Work slash studies. Currently learning about colors. There we go. That's something a 12 year old does, right? Tagline. You're now on a list. How f***ing long is this bio? What's going on for ages? I'm both hitting the backspace and tapping their backspace to just try and get it done. Finally, we're there. Alright, about. I'm 12. And I like arts and crafts. That's all that's in my interests. Submit. Well, I need five interests. God damn it. No one could be that interesting. Alright, arts and crafts, dancing, pets and animals, gaming. I'm a gamer. Movies. No matches. Why? Anus. I'm 12. Currently learning about colors. You're now on a list. And a little smile. Alright, I'm trying to log into another app. I'm just resetting her passwords. Oh wait, what the hell? Oh my God, it worked. I'm getting a phone call. F***. No, it was actually just someone after reporting me for setting up a 12 year old on Spark, but it's all good. I lied my way out of it. Oh God, security question. You need to answer these questions. What is your mom's maiden name? It's never Anus, is it? Oh, f***, okay. We're going to have to figure this out. Oh, here, an email from mom. Lauren Hardy, is that it? What is your favorite movie? Oh God, dammit. I don't suppose it's the same answer. Laurel and Hardy, is it? What the hell was that? Jesus Christ, I think I found Anus. She's in my right ear. Oh, it's like Twitter. Okay, oh wait, is this the same Taylor from the Spark app or whatever? How do you win a war on drugs? It's hard to win a war without drugs. Look, Taylor, I'm calling you out. There we go. Taylor matched with me on Spark. Oh my God, this random Jackie C between Bob Ross. Okay, Taylor matched with a 12 year old. Jessica says, you're obsessed with me. I get it. Taylor is obsessed with me and I am 12. I'm just really trying to ruin this guy's life. Oh my God, Lord, this game's f***ing jump scares. Like, there's no f***ing need. All right, I'm telling Greg, she literally just made a new post. Awesome, send it to me. Send a photo. Oh, is this the demented one? Yeah, send a man instead. No, this is not right. He's totally underwhelmed by this video. He's like, oh wait, I see it too. One of my friends reposted it. That's her place. Did you not pay attention to this one where she's just manically crying? Oh my God, now Greg wants a code from her phone. Don't make me wait. I just don't care about him. Let me send something else. Oh, there we go. I found this. This is perfect. Send this. I don't know Greg's full name but he's not going to tell me. Why is everything a f***ing mystery? Make sure to use my full name. You know I'm a stranger. Why aren't you telling me the full name? God, he's got so many needy messages here too. Greg Summers, there we go. Found him. All right, now he can get into her house and check if she's there. Judging by her jabber post, she should be. I can hear someone inside. Doesn't sound like her. I'm going in. Good luck. That's what I'm going with. Go on in. He's like something's wrong. There was this voice or a sound. I'm recording this. Must be Toby. He just ran off as the cat. I'm just trying to get him to go in there and die to this murderer. Oh no, he's sending me an audio clip of what he heard. I don't want to be jump-scared again. That's the neighbors. They're getting freaky. They're also Sims by the sound of it. That didn't sound like English. I'm blaming ghosts. Mystery solved. He's like, that is your explanation? He's calling me stupid. Someone requested a remote wipe from the PC. Greg, are you doing this? Is this because of the ghosts thing? Because there are no stupid answers. Oh no, wait. There are no stupid questions. There are definitely stupid answers. I'm here giving him a talking to. I've fallen out with him. I'm calling him hopeless now. I'm saying it would be nice to feel appreciated when the phone is freaking out. Okay. Now he's apologizing. Good. Thank you. I'd like to be appreciated. Can we please walk together to find my missing girlfriend? Please, no. I'm leaving you for Taylor. I've decided that Anna is now dating Taylor. The phone's rebooting. I don't think I solved anything. I just ruined a lot of lives as usual. But I guess that's the end of the episode. I don't know if this is actually supposed to happen. It looks like it is because I can just set up a new user here. And I'm guessing there's going to be still things on it. What do you mean full name, please? Turk is a full name. We're going to leave it there. If you do want to see more of this, let me know. I'd be open to playing more of it. We could try and figure it out, either here or on stream. If you want to check out more of my videos, I post every single day. And as I said, I also stream over on Twitch. The link for that is in the description. But we've kind of run out of time. So poor Anna is just going to be left out there with some murderer or ghost or whatever it might be for the time being. I hope you enjoyed the episode though. I really appreciate you watching. And I hope to see you next time. Bye for now.