 One more live. On your mark, get set, go. This is Dennis Devaney Burke. Welcome to Divine Intimacy Radio, your Radio Haven of Brass, your Hermitage of the Heart, your monastery of the mind where we lift our hearts and minds to heaven to draw upon the wisdom of the saints and help us to navigate the tumult of this life, the challenges of this life. And today we're talking about mental prayer again. It's kind of one of our favorite topics. Yeah, part two. Part two. If you want to, if you've ever wondered what mental prayer is or, you know, heard this conversation about it and it makes you want to know how to do it, the reason I wrote into the deep into the deep finding peace through prayer. I was saying, I actually was, I had the Spanish in my head for some strange reason. Mar Adentro. It does come in Spanish, which is cool. That's right. What it's called in Spanish. How do you say finding peace in prayer? Because Mar Adentro is into the deep. You know, right now. Good try. Like, yeah, it's early. My brain's not quite there. So I wrote that book. The reason I wrote it was we were working with college students at the time. There's a lot of great books about Lectio Divina out there, but not in a single one that I ever found that you just hand to someone and they read it and know exactly what to do. Yeah. Here's the other cool part. We just completed a film series on it that is free. That is the kind of quality of a film series you show to your parish or you do in a small group or whatever spiritual direction.com forward slash. Is it pray, Jordan? Or is it pray? It's just pray. It's pray. So it's spiritualdirection.com forward slash pray. Right. And if you do it, I'll give you this promise. If you show this to your parish and you want me to come and do a zoom drop in to answer questions at the end, if my schedule will allow it. And so I'm turned any down that I can remember. I will do a one hour Q&A with your parish. So spiritualdirection.com forward slash pray and check that out. It's not prayer. It's pray. It's pray. Okay, cool. All right. On to some questions about prayer. I can actually see this. Oh, you can read now. You have your glasses. That's good. Go figure. I actually need them. You want to say you want to read this one? Just to see if you can still read. Which one? Number five? Okay. Number five. Yeah. I think you either quoted a saint or said, quote, if you don't put into practice what you've learned, the opportunity passes you by and doesn't come back. Or in other words, quote, it is dangerous to encounter grace and not to respond to it. You know who else said that? Who? Saint Augustine. I may, well, got it from St. Francis to sales. That doesn't surprise me that Augustine said it too. Be aware of grace that passes by. Right. You might not get another chance to right to engage with it. So would you please expand on this and does this also have to do with making resolutions after mental prayer? I struggle with making resolutions after mental prayer. What should that resolution look like? How specific should it be? Yeah. So I'll do part of that. Yeah. That's too nice. Too vague. As you know, that's the problem. Be nice. Be nice. Don't shoot someone. That's not helpful unless you're inclined to do that sort of thing. It's still not helpful. It's not. Why would you condone violence on this show? I just said, don't shoot someone. I'm not condoning violence. Okay. So what should it be? I forgot what we were talking about here. Be specific about resolutions. Should you have one? No, no, no. Always. So grace that passes you by and then you can do the other one. Okay. Grace that passes you by is this concept that the moment you're in is never going to be repeated again. And if you meet God in that moment, respond to, you know, or that grace that he was trying to give you in that moment doesn't ever come again because the moment's gone. Yeah. So it's really serious. It reminds me of that passage in Hebrews. If today you hear his voice, do not harden your heart. Pardon on your heart. You know, yeah, I mean, it's just a really dangerous thing to do because God is moving. He's speaking to you and you're going, I'm busy. You know, I've got more important things to do. I got bills to pay. Got to do my work. You know, got to fix my lawn mower. Well, what about hell? What about eternity? What about your salvation? What about the reason you exist? I'm too busy. So yeah, not a good idea to let those moments pass you by. Be attentive. Yes. Yes. So the question was about resolutions. Oh, yeah, I'm not a big fan of that. I struggle with making really revelry resolutions after mental prayer. What should it look like and how specific should it be? You know, we talk about, I think you talk about in, into the deep, taking a little nose gay away, a little flower, Francis the sales, a little flower. So, you know, sometimes when you're reading, you know, you're meditating on scripture, a line jumps out to you or moves you or just really has a profound effect on you. You know, that, that in of itself becomes part of it. It's, it's to take that away and perhaps write it on a sticky note that you carry into your day and, you know, you place it in your workspace or on your phone where you can go back to it here and now, you know, here and again, during your day and just let it ruminate within you. That's, that's a type of resolution. If you are convicted against a particular sin, if you realize that you're struggling with avarice or you're struggling with gluttony or sloth or you're struggling with love, if you realize, wow, I've just not loved the way the Lord has loved me. I'm not loving as Christ loves. I need to die to myself more than that is a resolution that you can say, okay, I need to love more. What does that look like specifically? Pick the person that's closest to you, the one that you are called to love most genuinely on a day to day basis and figure out what that means. And, you know, I, there was this beautiful woman that came for, for prayer and I'll never, you know, reveal anybody's name or anything like that. Just really lovely person and very high Martha syndrome, just rushing around, lots to do. And, and it, you know, it comes out of woundedness, this need to, to move, move, move, business, right? And her husband said, you know, I really wish you'd just have a cup of coffee. Can you just have a cup of coffee? And so after the healing, you know, it was, it was a sweet moment. I said, sit down and have a cup of coffee. Yeah. Like that's an act of love because your spouse wants to be with you, be, you know, respond to that and you'll be surprised what the Lord does with it, right? Just sitting across from one another, looking at each other and talking about the day over a cup of coffee is a, can be a tremendous act of love, you know. So just things, whatever it is that the Lord's working on you and inviting you to do that's inspired in, in your prayer time. Do that. Ask, be attentive, write it down, act on it. And if it's super significant, put it into your rule of life so that you continue to do it and receive all the graces from it. I don't know what you think about this. I think that's more important early on in prayer than later. Okay. For me, now it's just maybe my own prayer life and the way that my prayer life works. Have you asked your wife about that? I'm at, you're my wife. I'm talking, I'm asking you. So the, for me, my rule of life is very constant. I know what I'm working on. I find the resolution thing. Now I like the nose gay things, weird, old-fashioned phrase, which just means- It's the name of a particular flower. Well, it's the name of a tuft of flowers. It can be a mixture of flowers together. So I like that. But I've got enough to work on in my rule of life and my, my focus is pretty specific. Now, if it was something that really jumped out at me, like not too long ago, I had an actual locution of slow to speak. And so that went into my prayer book. But I don't, maybe it's that I don't experience that a lot. I don't know. Maybe it's just me. Yeah. You're always in the desert. Most of the time. Yeah. In the desert. Yeah. I think, I think it depends on you. If you're, if you're getting a lot of that, and you can take those and, and it's not piling on to what you already committed to. And it's in keeping with Galatians 5, 22 and 23, that it's of the Lord. It's, it's something that leads to greater faith, hope and love. You know, it just depends if the Lord works specifically, he works big picture, and then he works specifically with a soul for whatever they need. And I know folks that get beautiful little things all the time. Yeah. It just, I struggle with this idea of focus here, focus here today, focus, no, focus over there. Oh, over there. What was over there? You know. Yeah. That's a guy thing. For, for a girl, it's, it's, you know, for a woman, it's not a focus. It's more of a, it's more of a musing. It's more of a, of pondering in the heart, I think, is, is how I would look at it. Yeah. So, you know, she pondered all these things in her heart like Mary, right? She took these beautiful thoughts, these beautiful loves and touches and consolations and inspirations to greater faith, hope and love. And she tucked them into her heart, and that grace tucked into the heart then starts to bear fruit, right? Yeah. It doesn't necessarily have to be written down. It can be if it's specific, but if it's more in general of, oh, I'm, I'm just, I'm going to carry this joy, you know, as I'm, as I'm reading about the joy of, of Mary running to see Elizabeth, you know, after the Annunciation, and that causes joy in me, I'm going to carry that joy into my day. But that's different than resolutions, but regardless, regardless, because I'm agreeing with what you're saying, you're saying all that. Yes. But, you know, here's the bottom line. Do what best leads you to love. I think what's more important is you have a rule of life. If you don't want to know how to get a rule of life, I'm going to be producing a new book on it. But I talk about it a bit in navigating the interior life, which was my first book long, long ago. One of the best Catholic book award of the year, which was kind of dumb, but because Benedict's infancy narratives, it always bothers me. You know what you should say is, praise the Lord. Praise the Lord. Yeah, but it just isn't right. Just praise the Lord. Just praise the Lord. He's the Pope. His book should win the best book. The Lord allowed it. So you're going to argue with the Lord. No, no, it's fine. It's all good. It's all good. It gave us the funds to start this. There you go. The Avala Institute. There you go. The Pope didn't need the funds that year. That's a good point, I think. I don't know. It's getting a little weird around here. Okay, next question. No, we got to go to break. So when we get back, we'll continue asking questions about prayer. We'll be right back. So we're going to do 13 in the next segment. So for those who are hanging with us, Eche Homo, Lenten Retreat this Friday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday, March 21st through the 23rd online event, spiritualdirection.com forward slash events. Lots of amazing speakers. There's one you've never heard about, and I want you to pay attention to. Listen to the talk by Father Chase Hildenbrink. Father Chase Hildenbrink. He is spectacular, amazing vocation director. So anyway, lots of other great speakers. Check it out, spiritualdirection.com forward slash events and angels and demons, of course, coming up in the Avala Institute Tuesday, April 30th, 2024. My senior child's Pope, going to discuss the reality and nature of angelic beings and then about possession and exorcism. So check that out, abala-institute.org. And before we head back, the last thing I'll tell you is this show is sponsored by Holy Habits app. If you want to be holy and you want to be virtuous and you want accountability and you want clarity, get the app and the Catholic community of apostolate VA. So let's go back to the show and your markets at go. This is Dan and Stephanie Burke. Welcome back to Divine Intimacy Radio talking about questions and answers regarding prayer. I think you should read this next one and you answer this one. Why don't you read it and I'll answer it? Okay. Okay. Are our commitments after small groups supposed to be related to what we discussed and discerned or are general commitments okay as well? If we apply what we have discussed in order to formulate commitments, is that more conducive to bringing about growth and drawing closer to our Lord than just making random commitments? Would you please explain how we make our commitments more personal, concrete and actionable? How can we make them more specific in order to evaluate at the next meeting if they are fulfilled, partially fulfilled or not fulfilled? How specific should they be? So what she's talking about is this is a person who runs a small gospel encounter group. So what they're doing is they're meeting every other week and we have these all over the world in apostolate VA and what they're doing is they're teaching people how to encounter Jesus in the gospel. When they encounter him and something moves them, they're called to make a commitment. It's kind of like the last question, but that was more in private prayer. This is in a group setting and you should it be related to what we discuss or general commitments okay. It always should be related to what you discover in and through reflecting on Jesus. That's the whole point is connect your heart and mind to Jesus. That's why it's a gospel encounter group, not a New Testament encounter group in terms of the letters of Paul or whatever. We're trying to come to know Jesus. And then you live it out personally. Right, right. You live it out personally. So the best way to make sure your commitments are good is use the acronym SMART. Specific, measurable, actionable, realistic, and time bound. So here's where here's what doesn't work. I just want to be nicer. This would happen in one of my groups. I'm going to be nicer to my wife. I told the guys, you know, guys talk to each other like this. I said, Oh, isn't that cute? How are you going to do that? Oh, I'm just going to be nicer to my wife. You're not leaving here with that kind of silly resolution, which is going to result in nothing. And I said, what is your wife hate that you do? What irritates your wife? And he said, why leave my underwear on the floor? So that's a way to be nice to your wife. Specific underwear, floor, not on the floor, on the floor, measurable, on the floor, not on the floor. Is it there? Is it not? It's binary. Actionable. Can you do something about it? Yes. Reasonable. You have total control of the circumstances. Yes. Time bound. Every day, I'm going to check before I go to bed to be nice. So that's just an example of how to do it. Yeah. Easy breezy. Easy breezy. Okay. Would you please explain the difference between judgment and discernment? Okay. So I will judge whether this your answer is correct or not. I'll discern if your answers from the Lord or from the devil. No, I mean, so judgment is synonymous with the word assessment. But what it means is we're actually called to assess and to make judgments. We're not called to condemn, which is what Jesus was really talking about there. Or judge a heart. And we know that because when he says judge not what should be judged, the next passage is talking about don't cast your pearls before swine, which means he's saying there are people who are equivalent to swine in the sense that if you try to give them good things, they will ruin them. They'll destroy them and they'll just digest them into a pile of whatever. So he's saying the difference between if you want to say condemning and discerning, that's one way to ask the question. Or is it assessing and discerning? Yeah. Assessing is using like just human logic and, you know, your rational capabilities and, you know, the teachings of the church or whatever. Discerning means that you're using the rules of discernment typically. I mean, not for people with the gifts of discernment, but you're using the rules of discernment or you're using the principles taught in the New Testament about testing all things and discerning, you know, unholding fast, that which is good. So assessment is just using common logic reasoning. Discerning is using a more specific set of tools that the church gives us to determine whether or not something is from a demon or from an angel. Yeah. And I think you're really also talking about, in general, two different things. So a judgment or an assessment might be on an action, like, you know, like what's going on, right? What's going on in this situation? Is it good? Is it bad? Is it in control? Out of control? Is it productive? Is it destructive? We can look at actions of individuals and say this is, and we can judge that they're not holy actions, right? We're not condemning the person. But we're not condemning the person, nor are we judging the heart. Right. Because we don't know, you know, it's that whole old adage of, you know, don't judge someone until you've walked a mile in their shoes. And until you understand what's at the very core of their being. And none of us can be with every person from the moment they're conceived to understand what they've undergone, what's been afflicted on them, or what they've afflicted themselves with, what they've cooperated with, that may have caused them to behave the way they behave. So what if you have a good man with bad shoes? Yeah. Okay. Next question. Okay. Next question. We're a bad man with good shoes. Is there a story? No, no, no, no, that we can't do that. We're gonna jump to number 10. Oh, okay. Okay. Okay. Number, number 10? Yeah. Oh, okay. Wow. We skipped a bunch here. Okay. What does living at the pace of prayer mean? Well, it depends on if it's a drive by rosary, or if it's contemplative prayer, living by the pace of prayer. If it's a drive by rosary, it's, you know, like zipping around, Martha on steroids, and never taking time to love anybody or encounter anybody, certainly not the Lord. So we got things to do. And Lord, can't you make her get up and help me? So there's a, that's not what we're talking about. No. So not even close. So there's a little story behind this phrase that I came up with living at the pace of prayer. So 30 years ago, I came out of a pretty problematic childhood and very intense. And I was a very intense person. I used to literally run everywhere, get out of my car, run, I was just trying to make use of all the time. And, you know, I always felt behind and whatever it was just a psychotic time of my life. And then I stumbled across a book. I can't remember the title, but it was about distress and use stress and what it does to the body. And it talked about how that even positive stress can be very destructive at too much, you know, too much positive stress. Anyway, it just made me realize that I was living in kind of a foolish way. And my intensity wasn't going long in the long run. It was going to do me a lot of harm. And I was also at the time trying to develop a prayer life and devotional life to the Lord. And I realized at some point that there was this intensity level that if I operated at that level, or above it, I was not able to work and pray at the same time. And I also recognized at the same time, there was an intensity level whereby I could work and pray simultaneously, or be aware of the presence of God. And when I was moving faster than the pace of prayer, what do you think my temperament was like? Well, I was irritable. I was, you know, not as kind and patient with people. I was more efficient. If I was moving slower than that intensity level, because I'm aware of God, I'm aware I'm talking to the daughter of the king, which is my wife, and not just someone who I work with, you know, who's there to get stuff done for me. It's a totally different orientation. So I made it a goal in my life to shift to operating at a pace of prayer. And I have slowed down if that period of my life was 500 miles an hour, I think I'm at least down to, you know, 40 at this stage in my life, both because I'm older and tireder. Is that a word? Tireder? No. Older and more tired than I was before, but also just learned that it doesn't pay. And it's, you know, living a life at the pace of prayer means, as you noted, I don't remember our last show, but one of our phrases that we firmly believe in is all things for God, begin before God on our knees. And so the goal is constantly worshiping him and being aware of him and praising him and being grateful to him as, and being loving, loving him and easy, easy communication with him is when the, and the analogy just as an illustration, we have this lawnmower here at the retreat center that is lightning fast, like dangerous fast. It's made for huge golf courses where you got a lot to mow and in a little bit of time. And it's fun because it does burnouts and you can, you can drift it and, you know, and so there are times when I just like, I do not want to mow. And so I go incredibly fast and I'm, you know, sliding all over the place, but I'm getting it done quick. There is no prayer happening in that moment. Why? Because my senses are overloaded. I'm going so fast and things are so intense, and I got to turn at a specific time and I've got to, you know, make sure I'm hitting all the right places. I don't run into a tree, you know, all of these things. And so most of the time when I mow, it's slow because I want to be able to, I don't, I don't want to have to absorb the entire D of my faculties with the action that I'm focused on. I want some of that to be committed to the Lord. And so I have to slow down to the, to a maximum of intensity and then back off a little bit to where I can still pray and get work done. Yeah, it doesn't mean acting like a turtle. It just means behaving and acting and moving and working in a way that you can still, that you're still aware of the Lord and still aware of who's you are and his presence in other people. So we have time for one quick last question and it's quick. In the book, particular exam and rooting out hidden faults, it speaks about making frequent acts of humility and seeking humiliations. What does that mean and how do we do that? Other than being married to me, which only one person can, what, what would be general truth about doing humiliations? Well, frequent acts of humility would be putting others before yourself. Seeing others as the, I love this, this little thing is kind of a visual of others equals Jesus and understanding that, you know, I am the servant of all. And, and so if I act in that way, that it's an act of humility to act as a servant to all. There's nothing beneath me. I should be seeking to serve others and to love them as I would desire to love and serve Jesus. So that's, that's one way. Others is have mercy on me, Lord, a sinner. Just that simple prayer. Yeah, have mercy on me, Lord, a sinner. That's a, that's an act of humiliation or prayer of humiliation. With that, we've got to wrap it up. Okay, check out Holy Habits app. If you want to grow and gain some accountability, check out apostoliva.org. If you want Catholic community that's on by ya. And with that, that's it. Won't you take us out until next time? May the God of peace make you perfect in holiness. May he preserve you whole and entire spirit, soul and body irreproachable of the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. Amen. Amen.