 Your Coca-Cola bottler presents Claudia based on the famous play and novels by Rose Franken Brought to you transcribed Monday through Friday by your friendly neighbor who bottles Coca-Cola Relax and while you're listening refresh yourself. Have a Coke and now Claudia Mr. Warren, Mr. Warren, funny his wife said he was out here in the barn. Mr. Warren Warm and friendly and a cow barn on a nippy morning. My ears are still tingly David, did you ever see so many cows? Yes You have got a green light of envy in your eyes. Look, we're only going to have one card Your young folks are here bright and early. Yes. Thank you for the telephoning us this morning about your decision to let us have one of your cows Yes, Jared and I talked it over after you left yesterday Maybe he's right Trouble with me and cows is I don't like to sell the good ones and I raise only good ones It's to be sort of a case of too much of a good thing even with good things there can be too much But the cow I sell you won't be too much like selling the cow and she'd be right on the next farm We're here in the cow barn, Mr. Tucker He ain't bought nothing yet. You ain't said yes on the cow yet. Nope. We just got here. It's good. It's good Why don't you two youngings wait for me? That's high-tailed over here like two frisky calves let out to a new pasture You ain't cut your eye teeth neither of you when it comes to cows without the advice and guidance of an expert You'll you'll get your hide scum. I suppose Jared you think you're whispering. Yeah or so bullfrog If there's anybody in Eastbrook, you got to watch out for a shot trade He'd be you not me speak of the devil and he'll hear you Matthew with what I said applies to you take it to heart and mend your ways If it don't then don't feel your toes got stepped on It's funny how tender a man's toes can get yeah speaking of tender toes Ain't you time to forget in that saw you sold me that was burned and never had no pigs Ain't you forgetting it. I didn't want to sell her you most busted your britches you had to buy or so I didn't say she was better. You didn't ask. Yeah, what would I be wanting with a barren sow? How should I know? World's full of darned fools. Maybe you wanted to keep her for a pet Anyway, I didn't charge you more and she was worth for me much Hadn't been so eager to skin me the price I was asking would have been less look mr. Warren mr. Tucker Claudia and I want to buy a cow, but we don't want to be the occasion for two neighbors to have ill feelings two neighbors between home We live who's corn we ain't corn. Jerry talks a lot, but he don't mean nothing by it Oh, I don't hey, well, let me tell you one thing that Mr. Warren Just what cow did you have in mind selling? No, probably some old multi and bag of bones with the heaves and staggers and blind on Well, I was going to let you pick your choice out of the four animals this end of the line Oh called out your poor ones did you but after Jerry's remarks I sort of think I'll let you pick any animal in the herd. It's like your fancy, of course We have to negotiate the price thought there was some hitch and kink into it. We might pick out your best time Miss Norton, you'll be buying the very good cow. I'm sure we would Why don't you just look up and down the line by yourselves? I got some feet to throw down to the calves and when I come back I'll tell you anything you want to know Trap the old fox at time sometimes you use honey to sweeten them up sometimes vinegar to rile them prefer vinegar myself Hey God danged if we ain't gonna buy the best cow in the county, but it doesn't seem fair to mr. Warren Mr. Tucker fair fair fair Matt Warren will never star for anything you do to him. Come on. Come on. Come on times away What do you think of this one here? Oh, I think she's nice babes in the woods should be babes in the woods blade in the foot Thin in the shoulder droopy in the eye long in the couple slapped into the ribs other poor attached She's seven years old in a tail shot wouldn't look twice this pal That's a pretty overall and complete diagnosis. Mr. Tucker. I can diagnose you cow. All right You got yourselves an expert. I didn't know there could be that much wrong with a cow and still be alive Oh cows go she ain't bad, but she's a long long way from the best now for Matt Warren comes back We got to apply some of this here thing called a Psychology on a call this is something I would like to see no no no no not on a cow on Matt Warren We got to put ourselves in Warren's place and see what he would do What would you do if you were selling cows? Well, I I don't know. I've never sold cows Where would you look for his best cows son? I don't think I follow you. Oh, just like I said you tour babes in the woods babes in the woods Warren will have his best cows tucked away off in the far end of the barn in the dark We'd pass him by without any notice come along now. That's a pretty fundamental lesson in psychology new men make things so involved Women are more direct. Oh, look at look just just like I said look this here like Brindle there in the corner There's a cow That's a real cow to me all cows are gray in the dark a little garbled but an apt quotation However, believe me darling. This is quite a lot of cow watch that you say watch that Speak up you youngins if you don't like that cow. You don't know nothing about cows Oh, I like her but not knowing much about cows. I don't know why I'm supposed to like her I'll just look at her bill neat and compact right womanly. She is right woman matter confirmation That's a big word cover a lot of sins and fail and son Take a cow point by point and then add them up. Well, let's see Got a long tail That's supposed to be good you tell her son tell her tell her well in the summertime Claudia when the flies are bad a cow with a Short tail can switch them off See you're I'm a good cow this Here's a one this year one. Here's your blend of cow if you didn't know Jared You wouldn't be asking she's fair cow. She's a fine fair Little under fleshed ain't she makes milk with a feed not be still a might more wait for her age She says she's got some age into her coming five only five you say Look stood to save your time. Um, you said you had some cows, Mr. Warren. I wonder if I can see They're right behind the door, Mrs. Norton. I'll just look at them darling while you and Mr. Warren That's a woman pray there. They're suckers for small things tabs and little piglets and little baby chicks and all them little things they sort of gravitate to him Say You wouldn't have been hiding this bull into cow. Would you Matt? I'm exactly Stand here in the dark. We might pass her by Well, you might have liked something better sooner. You mean not better This here's a cow. Mr. Norton. You might pass in your eye, too She'll milk you close to 30 pound a day You're better 40 when she's fresh. She'll milk you seven or eight thousand pounds in a year ten thousand four twenty last year That's quite a cow probably average better and four percent butter fat good jerseys a butter factory five point three Percent last lactation and she's no more and I should say a six year Comment five on the 21st of January Matthew you didn't tell a single lie Mr. Norton I tried to trip him but he give you the whole truth Stories printed with a record in last month's herdbook. Mr. Warren if you'd be willing to sell And I got married I made an agreement with you. You could buy any cow I got Now don't back away from the word once I give it give the devil is to I got that to say for Matthew here Nevertheless, mr. Warren, I I wouldn't like you to feel bound by what you said if you'd like to leave out this cow Well, when you got an advantage keep a hold out there not my thank you for saying what you did it was right Maybelly and don't believe Jared. This is mean and as cantankerous as he makes out to be he and I'll be just as mean and Cantankerous as I want to be don't you try to honey me up go on sell your cow buy your cow see if I care Now have said it Jared You haven't bought it. What are you bettering about girl to change your mind women women women and they're changing mine You haven't bought it yet. Well, I I guess you could say I've never been quite so close to buying well then don't why I've just seen the car. I want to buy mr. Warren a seller don't known from nothing about cows and all be yourself She's found the cow. She's got to have baby Probably seen a bull calf and hitched her fancy on please come and look at a day And you won't want to look at any other cow Alright, that's this this this is the craziest cow trading. I ever been mixed up into look There she is Come girl. Come on girl Isn't she beautiful? I'll be gal dang Just just simply gal dang Babes in the woods in a guiding angel eat you Miss Norton. I know you don't know nothing about cows, but will you kindly tell me how no one nothing about cows You come to pick this one. Well, I I know it sounds sort of silly, but David you won't laugh at me. No darling. I won't laugh at you Well, she has such nice eyes and such a sweet expression on her face And she's so pretty looking and graceful when she walks and and She follows me and she seems to like me Don't you girl? See Well, I'll be gal dang. Well, she looks like a good cow. I Thought you sold her Matthew. Yeah, I dick it around some but Finally backed away from the trade So they didn't like to sell her Well, I guess I've sold her now Tell the Norton's about her Matthew She's the Queen the Queen She's that which there ain't no better than She's the none Pirelli Long meadow majesty smoky smile She won a hat full of silver medals and enough gold medals to make a necklace out and Say uh Say say it again miss Norton say what what you said about this here cow Did she had nice eyes and a sweet expression nice eyes and the sweet expression She picks the girls dang this cow in the country miss Norton You couldn't have said no finest thing about the Queen Well, sir Mr.. Norton I I hope I Hope I hope you've learned your lesson. I have What lesson mr.. Tucker When you and I go out buying cows we take Mrs.. Norton with us all she has to do is look in their eyes One of the pleasures of having a home is being able to ask folks in for an evening's visit But that pleasure escapes women who think they have to go to no end of trouble preparing refreshments Next time you invite people over make things easy for yourself serve ice-cold coca-cola Your guests will enjoy the pause that refreshes and so will you order a case of coke and your hospitality Preparations are made Danged ever here tell us such thing. No, I never did mr.. Tucker pretty looking inside swaps graceful by Jiminy Cricket She picks the best cow in the herd Well son you and I know you tell a good cow by it's it But mrs.. Norton only has to look in their eyes Well that she did that she did little lady has a great flair for cow flesh a great flair, but what's the butt? But there's many slip-tweaks a cup and a lip or as you might say it tween picking out a fine cow and green to the Pricemer when we get to that point tomorrow, then the real trading begin well You couldn't keep me away, mr.. Tucker when you and Matthew Warren really go to Trayton. I'll bet you that's something and I'll be there Every day Monday through Friday Claudia comes to you transcribed with the best wishes of your friendly neighbor who bottles coca-cola So listen again tomorrow at the same time And now this is Joe King saying au revoir and remember Whoever you are whatever you do wherever you may be When you think of refreshment think of coca-cola For coca-cola makes any pause the pause that refreshes and ice-cold coca-cola is everywhere This broadcast of Claudia was supervised and directed by William Brown Maloney and Now here's a word from your friendly neighbor who bottles coca-cola