Help Gustav relief by going to BarackObama.com and donating to a disaster charity!!!
ALSO SEE: "Pray for Diarrhea"
"Pray for a Tornado"
Submit time segments and snarky comments and I'll add some more to the video.
"Hi, I'm Stuart Shephard, this is Stoplight.
Would it be.
Would it be wrong to ask people to pray?
Would it be wrong if we asked people to pray for rain?
(Notice how he speaks the next lines while plaintively looking up in the sky towards God...)
OK, not just rain, abundant rain, TORRENTIAL RAIN! Urban and small stream flood advisory rain!
Would it be wrong if we prayed for rain on say a particular night at say a particular location? Oh, I'd say the evening of August 28 right here at Mile High Stadium in Denver.
During the prime time TV hour when a certain presumtive nominee is set to give a certain acceptance speech at a certain Democratic National Convention.
I'm talking "umbrella ain't gonna help ya"-rain. Not flood people out of their houses rain, just good 'ol swamp the intersections rain. We're not asking for hail the size of canned hams or lightning bolts to set the bunting on fire. Just rain. Beautiful rain. Network cameras can't see the podium rain. Attendees can't walk back to the indoor arena without wishing for hip waders rain.
I know. You might ask: Why would I pray for that? [Because you're an evil, cynical, filthy piece of trash who wishes ill upon others. You are what is wrong with the world. You're a disgrace to the God and religion you claim to represent.]
Well, I'm still pro-life. And I'm still in favor of marriage being only between one man and one woman. And I'd like the next president who will select justices for the US Supreme Court to agree.
So I'm praying for unexpected, unanticipated, unforcasted rain that starts two minutes before the speech is set to begin.
Would it be wrong to pray for rain?
I don't have any special insights or special connections. I'm just an ordinary guy who's looking for people-lot's of people who feel like I do--to pray for rain.
Now I know there'll probably be people who pray for 72 degrees and clear skies, but this isn't a contest. But if god decides--and it's always up to god to decide--if god decides that rain of bibilical proprortions would be a good and proper meteorological condition for that evening. We'll see it, and we'll say that it is good.
And if he decides it's not really necessary; I'm OK with that. I'll still trust in his wisdom and I'll rest peacefully knowing that lots of us offered up a humble prayer request.
Would it be so wrong if we asked people to pray for rain?"
Yes Stewart, it would be wrong. And God is letting you know that by sending Gustav during "your" convention. He hates what you and your ilk have done to our planet over the past decades. You pray for ill upon your neighbor? Well prepare to meet your own political reaping this November.