 I understand why you don't like this movie. I mean, one, there's no explosions. Arnold Schwarzenegger doesn't play a cameo, which I know is heartless for you right away. What does that even mean? This is like the nirvana of movies for me. You know, like, it's one of those things where I'm supposed to like it. I'm not going to even hold it onto that trick. Everybody else is supposed to like it, but when I finally watch it, it just seems really pointless and boring. It's like a conversation with you. It's like this. There was explosions within explosions. I saw a mother explosion walking a baby explosion down the street. I mean, this movie is just explosions as far as I'm concerned. What the hell is Maggie Gyllenhaal doing in here? Replacing Katie Holmes? There's nothing I hate more than when a series replaces the actor-actress halfway through as the same character. They're replacing the beautiful Katie Holmes with fugly Maggie Gyllenhaal. Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me? Megan Gyllenhaal is no better or no worse than Katie Holmes. And the best part about that whole rant that you just went on is that half way through the movie, they take the most annoying character and they kill her. This week, Adam and I are taking on- What the hell is this? Oh, I didn't know you were still here. I thought maybe you were sick. I was in the car, so we're going to get dinner and then we're going to go do the District 9 review. Is this supposed to be me? It's got Will Ferrell's leading guy, but this movie just, it was all hype and little execution. This movie is one of the top five Christmas movies of all time. Wow! Of all time. Boom. The snow is meant to be like a cotton ball. It's fun for kids. Is this a Rudolph's red nose rainbow? The cops can't go inside of the park. Is there an invisible force field? Oh, but wait, the dumb ass kid with the hat can go in there. Turn your hat normal. I hate you. It's a hell of a way to die. Melting to death. You said it took 17 hours. Frosty felt everything. God, you think that's pain? Try doing a movie feuds episode with you. Hey-oh! Yeah, the voice acting wasn't great. It actually sounded like it was voiced by like 30-year-old men. And, you know, at some points you can almost hear them grunting in the background. It's really strange. I feel like we could have done a better job. In fact, we actually did. We recruited this entire film and we're going to give you a little sneak peek of that right now. Enjoy. Oh, hey Kara, we should hop on this train together. I just think I should maybe call my mom first. No, no, no, no, no. Just hop on this train. It'll be good. Maybe leave a note or something. No, no, no, no. Remember I told your parents they all suck? Yeah, come on, come on, come with me. I guess it would be alright. No, no, no. Take a couple of these pills. I'll knock you right out. We'll be there in no time. You're gonna weed on you? Hey, what? I'm not a big fan of the Harry Potter series. Wow! I know! This week, Adam and I are taking on the 1995 action flick Mortal Kombat! Play the music. Let's fight again. That's right. There's more cheese in this movie than Lambeau Field on a Sunday. I really... I don't think so. It's parts of 7 and combines them into one just terribly nasty sandwich. And really, again, with the broom, Adam. Clearly we were having so much fun. We were just talking about you. There's a kid out here. This movie's two hours long and it really could have just been maybe an hour and a half, hour and 20 minutes. I guess I don't know. Ten minutes. Just quick. I'll be short on adult swim. The Blizzard, maybe the 30s time setting. It really throws you off because you don't really know what you're watching. And all of a sudden it cuts the opening credits of Rudolph. I've always boggled my mind. I mean, they could have thrown Jimmy Smits in there at eating a Carl's Jr. double cheeseburger in black and white. Jimmy Smits? He's an acclaimed actor. I mean, we're talking Dexter season 3's and the new Star Wars movies. Wait, hold on, hold on. The new Star Wars movies, they're not Star Wars movies. They're sci-fi movies loosely based on the Star Wars stories. Okay, yeah, I'll give you that. I'll give you that. That's right. And in my opinion, this whole thing should have been about him. It really should have just been called The Cornelius Story, How Yukon Cornelius Saved Christmas, featuring Rudolph and a gay dentist friend. Poor decisions. We have to keep this thing going and Danny Glover ends up getting his throat sliced by Willie Coyote. Like, I don't... Oh, it's frustrating. And then his partner, Joe Somebody, runs out of the building and a shotgun brigade rains down on him because now he's home alone. This movie's home alone. And now it's in 3D? I don't need to see that. I won't see that. I love this entire franchise. I'll go head to head on every single one of the movies. I won't talk about this ever again. Yeah. Ever again. Oh my God. What are they going to do? He doesn't have the key. You think the hero's going to save the day and now they have to just hope along with the audience. I was just hoping this movie would end. I just wish I had three wishes. I'd use one of them to get rid of Adam. And then I'd give the other two to starving children because I have everything I need already. So I'm not sure if we'll ever see that eye on this one. But the one thing we do know is that you got a chance to say your piece. Leave us a comment below. Hey, are we doing this? Yeah, just... You're actually early. I was hoping to have this done before you got here. I'm like too much early. Do I even have to ask? Um... You know, I'm just kind of doing a color separation type of thing. Sort of a yin-yang, short moods, you know. Can we talk about this later? Yeah, that's fine. Let me just knock out a quick base and then we'll get started on the... Oh, it shouldn't take me long. We're in Arizona, hour and 30 minutes. The credits are all in. I'm happy and I leave. Did you want them to just race all over the world? Is that what you're looking for? Is it a geography test? In a COGS movie, to have them race would be refreshing. But what a lax in that, it makes up for its fun. Disappointment. Let's start this critic clash with the quote from Tom Charity. I am legend doesn't look like a CGI extravaganza. I'm sorry, what movie were you watching? That's all this is. It's all CGI. I don't even know if the dog was real. I've been a fan of his since Fresh Prince of Bel Air when he was Ice Trey. Wow, what an obscure reference. Why do you know that? Don't test my knowledge of Fresh Prince. Transformer style destruction, you know, just... He's in the background like flipping switches. He's just clapping. He's the only guy that really loves this movie. I get this. Excellent. I get this movie. I would have written it the exact same way. Without a writer. No! Crap it Tony, take it! An indie horror film that won a ton of awards, went to the big screen. Just a good rags to riches story here. I was thrilled. Rags to riches. I already saw this rag. It was called Blair Witch Project. I hated it then, I hate it now. Really? That's your comparison? The handy cam thing is the only thing you're going off. I'm just comparing the dirty rags. Indie acting. Okay, well what I saw was a couple bitching at each other the whole time. If I want to see a fat white woman bitch, I'll just go to the local Walmart guest services section and cut in front of her. I didn't even think she was that fat. Well, you also thought this movie was good, so we're both lying today. Timing. Hi, Fidelity. It's a movie. Hi, Fidelity, Sir John Cusack. He's not a sir. But this is more than just reviews, this is movie feuds. What? Was that the new tagline? You just changed it up? Oh, producer didn't tell you? I'm trying to get you off the show for a while. You know, I guess I just like a warm, natural warmth throughout the holidays. A warm, natural warmth. A candlelight vigil. Well, Corey's obviously diving way too much into this Kevin Mythos. Mythos? I just want to say Mythos. How many words are you going to make up this room? I just want to say Mythos. That's a word. It's like mythology. It doesn't mathos, ethos, mythos. It's all the same to you. Let us know what you think. Pause for drama? I was going to say, let us know what you think. What do you think? This weekend movie. Let me just pause here for a minute and just say one thing. I understand that you're writing this movie and it's part one of part two, but just because you put part... Alright, do that. I was going to say it anyway, but I'm not. Let me just pause here for a second. I understand that's what you do when you've got a lot of boobs. Let me just pause here for a second. I understand that there's... I don't know how to read that. I understand that there's like a bazillion books. There's seven. But I don't understand why they have to do like every movie literally into a book. What? What is going on here? Are you literally in the book? You got Sonya Blade taking on Kano. It's a cool scene in the beach. Shang Tsung's telling her to go on. He's pushing her to take it to the limit one more time. Right out of the gate... Wow. I did enjoy it in every movie. Right out of the gate. Come and see this. Well, everybody knows the story of the... That's trying to go over the top there. We definitely enjoyed this film. And you know, right around the hour mark at the length, anybody can really watch it. You know, it's not too long for the old people. He also got rid of Simba for a while. But let's break Scar down. He's a prick. He's a prick. He's just a bad person. Today, Adam and I square off on Wally. An old time flick, but apparently it's still got a little kick to it. A whole time. It's like three years old. What is old to you now? We're keeping that in. We're keeping that in. Why? Why are you keeping that in? Today, Adam and I square off on... Today, Adam... What's your name? Start over. Yeah, I'm Adam. Peter. Peter Parker. But as an indie horror film, it's about as good as it gets. Jack Nicholson. Not quite up to... Really? I don't know what that means. As good as it gets? It's not quite Jack Nicholson. As good as it gets. I haven't said much. And you know, not to kick a homeless guy while he's... What? You know, I've been keeping mum. What? You know, Sea Dog, I've been mum most of this episode. You don't look at me. I'm not. Why are you so dumb? You know, Sea Dog, I've been mum most of this episode, and I don't want to kick a homeless man while he's down, but... Not to be the dead homeless man. Which one's better? Why do you have to choose between the two? Now I'm just waiting to know which one you'd go with. You got me intrigued. You know, Sea Dog, I've been mum most of this episode, and I don't want to beat a homeless guy.