 Howdy how's it going? My name's Davy Chappie and it's time to get green with Envy because we're going to be talking about the enemy that is supposed to be threatening but never actually is, the orcs. I'm going to go over the lifestyle of the orc as presented in Vola's God of Monsters and I'm going to go over the abilities of both the orc and the half orc as playable races. As always keep in mind that a lot of this is just my opinion so if my words are confusing and make you want to hit me, welcome to the club and feel free to play your orcs however you want. But with that out of the way, let's begin. So orcs are actually a very straightforward race society-wise. In their eyes you are either strong or weak, you are either alive or you are dead. And no matter what, if you're alive you praise the gods for enabling you to survive but if you are dead everyone else praises the gods for ridding them of your weakness. Orcs only know of three things- fighting, fornicating, and praising the gods. Being born as an orc is a shithand to be dealt. As if you don't prove yourself capable with a weapon as soon as your little grubby hands can grip one, you will quickly be killed so that a different little psychopath can have your place. As you grow up the only thing that you do for fun is go out and raid roads, villages, small towns, something that you can make a day out of so that you can bring supplies back to camp and rest for a moment before going out to raid again. See, orcs believe that if they prove themselves as superior warriors they will be allowed to serve their almighty god Grumpsch after death by aiding him on the plane of Acheron in his never-ending war against Maglubiet and his goblinoid host. That's why, like the little psychopaths they are, any orcs that die worthy deaths in victorious battle are venerated by having their skull removed from their body and punched right in the eye with the intention of breaking it to represent Grumpsch who after a battle with the elven god Corlan lost one of his eyes. However those orcs who die in battle that their side did not win are left behind for they have proven themselves too weak to survive and are thusly forgotten. And in addition to just plain stab murdering any orc that slaves an elf in Grumpsch's name will then have the opportunity to prove themselves to him to which they do the only reasonable thing and stab their own eye out of their head so that they can also have poor depth of perception like old one eye. Although to be fair doing this will please him and influence him to grant that orc magical powers so as long as that orc can manage to murder the elf properly it's worth. Luckily for the orcs their presence in battle is actually pretty dangerous what they lack in decent health care and child safety regulations they more than make up for in straightforwardness and sheer numbers as they choose to attack any settlement that they believe they can beat and if they don't believe they can beat it they just kill everything going in or out until attrition rots the settlement to the point that they can beat it. In this way orcs channel Grumpsch's sons Ilneval the god of cunning and Bogtru the god of brutality who serve under Grumpsch in the same way that normal orcs serve under their war chief when orcs are finished killing and looting a place they then pile everything useful into their war wagon which is a previously pilfered wagon that acts as the symbol of a successful raid. The more full the wagon the more pride the orcs have in the raid and the best war wagons are the ones that only the strongest and mightiest orcs can manage to push. When a warband comes home the orcs take their spoils out of the wagon and put it to use in the tribe making orcs notably more parasitic than other intelligent monstrous races especially given that the orcs tribes only main export in the world is more orcs and holy birds and bees do they pump out a lot of orcs orcs don't make love orcs fuck and they fuck a lot but despite the normal stereotype orcs don't actually just go around fucking you your house and the horse you rode in on they actually don't like breeding with anything other than each other and the only exception to this is when an orc meets a human of unparalleled strength and might the orc will try to forge a bond with that human and solidify their unity with progeny creating the half orcs that we all know and hate all for the sole purpose of making as many new orcs as possible to replace the already ridiculous number of orcs that die to raids disease and bands of merry adventurers orc babies are maintained by the followers of luthic the wife of grumpsch and the followers job to make sure that the little welp stay in as much trouble as possible as they grow up to either be strong or die and speaking of death while orcs don't really fear it and they have a strict you either meet grumpsh or you don't mentality about the concept that doesn't mean that it doesn't have a place in their lives like I said before when worthy orcs die their skulls are ceremoniously punched and caved in but the orcs that normally do the punching are the followers of your choice the orc God of death and disease see when orcs aren't strong enough to not be bad at being orcs they still have a chance at being useful in the form of being the tribe's de facto mortuary system wherein they do the aforementioned skull punching and also take the rest of the orc body and crafted into furniture and structuring showing that orcs are the most eco friendly of the races and also that if an orc is a true and proud enough warrior they may one day have the honor of becoming a comfy chair given that your trust himself doesn't have a mouth those unfortunate enough to emulate him cut out their own tongues just like how grumpsh followers gouge out their eyes the only other use that your choices orcs have is when an orc starts to get diseased by the weathers of life your choices orcs help them the only way they can by taking them deep into the tribe and popping them full of more disease so that the tribe is ever in danger they can send those wound oh boys to die first and hopefully explode on the attackers and get them sick too now with extreme tactics like send the sick out first you wouldn't really expect the orcish race to have particularly grand enough ideas to form something like say a secret shadow organization but that's where you're wrong kiddo because the last orcish god is named chargas which is the orcish word for edgelord if an orc isn't strong enough to survive but shows a cunning aptitude beyond cleaning up after the dead that orc is brought before chargas is chosen and tested in success they are inducted into the cult of chargas and made to watch over the tribe to ensure that the gods are being venerated properly as well as killing any orcs that show weakness or failure that might destabilize the tribe however in failure the small tiny baby orc is eaten yep orcs eat babies it's right there in the book they also have a propensity for flying on giant bats in the night and assassinating important enemies of the tribe but they only do this on the direct order of the warship and even then the price that they demand in return for this most dishonorable order by the leader of the tribe no less will be great but more dangerous still than working with the most violent murderous of the orcish pantheon is to abandon the gods entirely nor orc tribe would willingly do this except in the most dire of circumstances but when a tribe is at its most dire straits when all hope is lost when the gods themselves will not look upon them a sign comes to the orcs a sign in the form of the abyssal demon lord boffam it should the orc tribe turn away from their gods and swear loyalty to him boffam it will reward the tribes unborn with the demonic blessing something to make them half demon half orc this newly born creature will be called tannarok and it is every bit as dangerous as it sounds their might is unsurmountable by any orc and their three tenants are held with a tighter grip they praise boffam it they mate so that they may make more tannaroks and they fight forever they fight so often and so fiercely that when the fight is over they will fight even their own side and i don't think i need to tell you that if any other orcish tribe discovers a tannarok anywhere it will become that tribe's single purpose to annihilate it and to help orcs with their fun fluffy murdering spree playable stats include a bonus to strengthen con a natural reduction in intelligence dark vision the powerful build trait proficiency and intimidation and the aggressive feature which lets them charge straight for their enemies and makes them obnoxiously fast if you see my kobold guide you know that i really hate the ability score negatives but i won't rehash that whole spiel again just know that in a game where almost no other race gets negatives despite their race traditionally having them you can just as easily rule that playable orcs shouldn't have them either now on the flip side half orcs also get a bonus to strengthen con as well as dark vision and proficiency and intimidation but in place of the orcs powerful build and aggressive traits half orcs add an extra dice to critical hits and they also keep one hp the first time that they're knocked down to zero once per long rest now that ability to stay up during a fight is really really good since i found that my players tend to stay in fights just one turn longer than they really should and this ability gives you a little padding for that other than that you're really not going to feel the extra crit damage that often on account of crits being rare and even then a poor role will make you feel like it didn't really affect much but it's still a cool ability to have for the occasions where it does help but that'll about do it i hope you enjoyed this video remember to review that subscribe button don't cut your eye out in ritualistic sacrifice and if you want my war wagon to be the thickest in town my patreon is always being watched by the old gods but yeah devio