 She was seven. I'm back. So I had a video request to do a Topic of how to know when your relationship is over when to leave Okay All this depends on certain things. Are you married? Are you just in a relationship? Do you have children? Are you being provided for? Are you the provider? Okay, so let's just take an example of each so First off if you're just in a relationship, no kids. No one's providing for anybody. Everyone's equal You know when it's time to leave when you don't see yourself with that person in five years The way that they are currently now if you can't imagine your life with somebody in Five years, and that's probably not the person for you if you have been with someone and they keep repeating patterns that are not beneficial to the relationship and It's basically dragging you down or draining you emotionally That's a that's a red flag for you to get out the relationship because Can you imagine five years of that and how much time and energy you will lose? How much of your youth you will lose wasting on someone who? It's not going to be there. You know in the long run. So I Tend to Think that entering into a relationship the first year of that relationship is kind of you know all the red flags will come up You'll know if this person is responsible You'll know if they have their priorities in order You'll know if they are good with money You'll know all these things and if you you know See yourself with this person in the long run because all those things, you know are good Then by all means stay in the relationship But if you see your relationship and headed, you know for a cliff Jump off before y'all both fall. Okay? A lot of people make decisions based on emotion when it comes to relationships But this is a big part of your life. This is a major decision in your life this affects the rest of your life and If you're making those very important decisions based on emotion and not logic, then you're probably going to kind of Make the wrong decision Okay, so when you go to buy a house or a car or apply to a school you Look at things logically. You look at numbers. You look at you know Statistics you look at All the things on paper before You make a big decision. Okay, you check out the neighborhood you check out the You know if this car Lasts or not if it has a warranty if this this isn't that But some people will just hop right into a relationship and stay there even though it's unstable It has no equity which means no future and it has no value to one of the persons in the relationship And you'll stay there just because you're emotionally attached That's like finding a house. That's your perfect dream house Just beautiful has everything you wanted and in a cheap price Okay, you're about to you're about to go close on this house But then you realize it's in a very bad neighborhood And very unsafe and that's why it's so cheap. Do you continue do you close on the house? Do you buy the house even though your security? It's at stake. Your life is basically at risk The value of your home is not going to be as much because of the neighborhood It's it are you still gonna go forward and purchase that house Probably not right? It's the same thing when you when you find a car. Let's say you're you're shopping for a car You find a used car you find a really nice luxury vehicle, but it has like All these miles on it it's been in an accident, but it's been repaired so no one could tell it's been an accident There's no warranty left on it It's expensive. So you know the maintenance is going to be expensive the parts are expensive So if you break down guess what it's coming under your pocket The insurance on it is high. So there you got to go up there but the car is Nice and it brings up your status and you know, it's your dream car Even though it's a few years older and it's like, you know No one the body style hasn't changed and you can get away with it If you really just want it to be flashy and show off Would you buy that car knowing they could break down any day You couldn't afford to fix it and all your money just went into it Would you invest in that vehicle or would you opt? For a more reliable vehicle. That's nice as well, but you're going to be paying more for quality Than you are for flash Which one are you gonna choose now a lot of people are going to choose based off their emotion and what? The outside world thinks about whatever, okay That's why you'll see a lot of broke people with nice cars Sitting in their driveway of you know a roach-infested apartment That's why you'll see a lot of people living, you know in a bad neighborhood In a decent house Because instead of investing in their security and safety They would rather have the big flashy house and risk getting shocked Okay, there are neighborhoods like that by the way. You don't know. Yes. Okay. I was looking at houses a While ago and their perfect house popped up. I'm like, this is everything we need. Oh my god Look this part straight up by the bad side of town or people get rod and shot daily Okay, it was a newly built house. So you would think it would be in a newly built neighborhood But basically what happened is they tore another lock down and built this house up big mistake. Okay So basically what I'm saying is it's time to leave your relationship when the stability It's not gonna be there in your future if there's no equity in it If it's not really worth your investment on paper. Okay, you can fall in love and feel giddy and Passionate and You know all Schoolgirl crush schoolboy crush with anyone that's new and looks good. That's just anybody. Okay but what you can't have is Two people who are going to make logical decisions together who will make sense together Who have their priorities in the correct order? So if you are stuck in a relationship with someone who it's like what we consider a loser And who's not doing anything with their lives and you Realize now that that in love puppy love feeling has worn off and that this person It's not who you wanted them to be or to turn into Or it's not the person that you thought that they would be and you want out But you feel sorry for them because you invested all this time my advice for you is to sit down and have a talk say look I Thought While I was like so deeply in love with you That you would become the man that I envisioned myself being with in the future But you haven't even started on that journey yet You're not even close to it. You're not even trying to become that and I'm going places and I Need certain things in my life that you're not providing right now And we've you know, we've been back and forth. I just think it's time for me to move on I think I've outgrown you. Okay, you can you can say that you've outgrown that person It's not a big deal people out grow each other every day or we've grown apart. We want two separate things, you know tell them why you're leaving them and Hopefully it will help them make a decision on how to improve upon their life So that the next person that they come in contact with won't have to have that same talk with them And if you're the person that's getting left, you know If someone's breaking up with you because you're not doing anything with yourself That should be a wake-up call to you. You know people don't leave loving relationships for no reason. Okay, people don't live Leave loving relationships unless it's missing something. Okay, people would cheat off through up and through a relationship But they won't leave it only time that people leave a relationship is when they're not benefiting benefiting from it anymore Okay, they don't feel a hole. They don't feel fulfilled. They don't feel equal They don't feel like, you know, you're offering them anything. They can't get by themselves or from somebody else, but even more so It's time to leave a relationship when you're no longer being benefited by it emotionally financially or spiritually, you know Some people grow spiritually and they have to leave their partner because their partner still stuck in a certain mindset that the other person Evolved from and just doesn't work anymore. I have so many people come to me and say, I wish my partner would get on board with, you know You know how I think and feel spiritually, but they're just stuck here and let me tell y'all that's not really a good reason to leave anybody because You evolved and they didn't spiritually when y'all got into the relationship y'all are both on the same level And it could work to your advantage Actually to have someone who's not as spiritual as you because they see things from a different perspective You know, some people get real spiritual and real blinded or real paranoid or overly Into conspiracy while the other person is still kind of grounded in the in the world And they see other things that are going on And they can keep you grounded as well as you can lift them and open their eyes on certain issues So it's kind of good to have someone who's not just like you. Okay You don't want a twin like a lot of people ask me about twin flames twin flames are basically They don't really incarnate on the earth at the same time And if you met your twin flame, you will probably hate their guts because they'd be too much like you Okay, you need a little bit of a difference, you know So I think it has become more of a term of endurment Rather than what it really is Okay So I would stop using that term so loosely and you know, a lot of people use that but I don't use it because I know what it really means So when you meet the one for you or the one that was compatible with you then You're gonna know and you're and if you have issues in that relationship You're gonna fight for it You're gonna stick through it because you see yourself in five years with this person like oh, they're going places I'm not going nowhere. I'm staying here. Okay. Oh, no. No, she's you know, she's a good woman I know I'm not going anywhere. I know that we don't get along right now, but She has potential. She has a future. I see her in five years Now if you can't say this about your partner and you're just stuck in an unfulfilling relationship, it's time to go Okay, I see A lot of people who are miserable in their relationships, but their partners have so much potential they're not going nowhere They're like, mm-hmm Just like that Beyonce song, you know, she's gonna be rocking chinchilla coats if I let you go Basically, she's saying if I let my man go then he's gonna be given, you know, all the stuff that I have You know Endured and and worked towards with this man to another woman. I'm not leaving. I'm not going to where I've invested too much into this relationship to leave So a lot of people feel like they've invested too much financially And as far as time and youth to actually leave the relationship. So either they find a way to work with it To think differently about the relationship to accept certain things about the relationship Or to see it in a whole new light, you know For what it is and detach either Emotionally and use more logic, you know treat it as a business because a lot of times that that lovey-dovey Puppy loves stuff hand-holding, you know, all that kind of stuff wears off over time, you know, and You say, okay, look, why am I still here? This is why I'm here This this this you can name a thousand reasons why you're still there and why it's benefiting you So you're not going to break up with that relationship But if you can name five things that's bringing you down, oh my credit's getting bad. Oh this this and that He cheats. He beats me He he doesn't you know, he doesn't spend time with the kids, you know, uh He let the dog out and the dog got hit by a car. Uh, you know, it just named everything, uh He lost his job, uh He went to jail. Um, he got court fees. He has medical bills. We don't have insurance If that's all up in your relationship The time to leave is now, okay I know people say through thick and thin But how thin are you going to wear yourself? Okay, sometimes self-preservation is the best option. Okay, now if you're if you're dealing with, uh, You know, someone who you fell in love with and that's why you married them or got into the relationship with it Because you truly love them and that love is worn off and there's nothing else Then of course you're going to be faster to leave than someone who entered into a relationship Based on financial security because they never went into the relationship for love in the first place They went for that security and until that security runs out. They don't really care. They're not going anywhere They're like whatever whatever has that marry you for love. I married you for money So a lot of people will stay in relationships based on the reason they entered into them. Okay You know, a lot of people see things from different perspectives. Oh, why don't you stay with him? He does this to you he cheats. He he lies. He does this He does a call and then you'll see someone who calls and it's honest, but the lights are out You're sitting in the dark with no food. Okay, so you got to make a decision Um people have certain reasons why they stay with their significant other. Um Some people will say, oh, I'm with a married man and I'm dating a married man and I can't leave him I'm in love with him But think about in five years. Are you going to be with that man still? Is he going to find a new person a new mistress? Is his wife going to find out and if his wife finds out takes everything from him and he can't even afford a mistress anymore Are you still going to want to be with him if he's like kicked out living in, you know one bedroom apartment With, you know, a lesser car than he has now. You can't take care of you or take you out. Are you still going to love him? um you know And I'm all for people doing what they want to do But when it's time to leave the relationship, you got to look for the red flags and look forward five years If it's not good bounce Okay, all right. I hope that this helped someone And if you have any questions or if you want to tell your story, um, put in the comment