 Chapter 3 The Queen Cook It was on a Saturday that the children made their first glorious journey on the wishing carpet. Unless you are too young to read at all, you will know that the next day must have been Sunday. Sunday at 18, Camden Terrace, Camden Town, was always a very pretty day. Father always brought home flowers on Saturday so that the breakfast table was extra beautiful. In November of course the flowers were chrysanthemums, yellow and coppery coloured. Then there were always sausages on toast for breakfast and these are rapture, after six days of Kentish Town Road eggs at 14 are shelling. On this particular Sunday there were fowls for dinner, a kind of food that is generally kept for birthdays and grand occasions and there was an angel pudding. When rice and milk and oranges and white icing do their best to make you happy. After dinner father was very sleepy indeed because he had been working hard all the week but he did not yield to the voice that said, go and have an hour's rest. She nursed the lamb who had a horrid cough that Cook said was whooping cough as sure as eggs and he said, come along kiddies I've got a ripping book from the library called The Golden Age and I'll read it to you. Mother settled herself on the drawing room sofa and said she could listen quite nicely with her eyes shut. The lamb snugged into the armchair corner of daddy's arm and the others got into a happy heap on the hearth rug. At first of course there were too many feet and knees and shoulders and elbows but real comfort was actually settling down on them and the phoenix and the carpet were put away on the back top shelf of their minds, beautiful things that could be taken out and played with later. When a surly, solid knock came at the drawing room door. It opened an angry inch and the Cook's voice said, please may I speak to you a moment. Mother looked at father with a desperate expression then she put her pretty sparkly Sunday shoes down from the sofa and stood up in them and sighed. As good fish in the sea said father chiefly and it was not till much later that the children understood what he meant. Mother went out into the passage which is called the Hall where the umbrella stand is and the picture of the monarch of the Glen in a yellow shining frame with brown spots on the monarch from the damp in the house before last and there was Cook very red and damp in the face and with a clean apron tied on all crooked over the dirty one that she had dished up those dear delightful chickens in. She stood there and she seemed to get redder and damper and she twisted the corner of her apron round her fingers and she said very shortly and fiercely, if you please ma'am I should wish to leave at my day month. Mother leaned against the hat stand. The children could see her looking pale through the crack of the door because she had been very kind to the Cook and had given her a holiday only the day before and it seems her very unkind of the Cook to want to go like this and on a Sunday too. Why what's the matter? Mother said. It's them children the Cook replied and somehow the children all felt that they had known it from the first. They did not remember having done anything extra wrong but it is so frightfully easy to displease a Cook. It's them children there's that their new carpet in their room covered thick with mud both sides beastly yellow mud and sakes alive nose where they got it and all that muck to clean up on a Sunday. It's not my place and it's not my intentions so I don't deceive you ma'am and but for them limbs which they is if ever there was it's not a bad place though I says it and I wouldn't wish to leave but I'm very sorry said mother gently I will speak to the children and you had better think it over and if you really wish to go tell me tomorrow. Next day mother had a quiet talk with Cook and Cook said she didn't mind if she stayed on a bit just to see but meantime the question of the muddy carpet had been gone in too thoroughly by father and mother. Jane's candid explanation that the mud had come from the bottom of a foreign tower where there was buried treasure was received with such chilling disbelief that the others limited their defence to an expression of sorrow and of a determination not to do it again. But father said and mother agree with him because mothers have to agree with fathers and not because it was her own idea that children who coated a carpet on both sides with thick mud and when they were asked for an explanation could only talk silly nonsense that meant Jane's is truthful statement we're not fit to have a carpet at all and indeed shouldn't have one for a week. So the carpet was brushed with tea leaves too which was the only comfort Anthea could think of and folded up and put away in the cupboard at the top of the stairs and daddy put the key in his trousers pocket till Saturday said he never mind said Anthea we've got the phoenix but as it happened they hadn't the phoenix was nowhere to be found and everything had suddenly settled down from the rosy wild beauty of magic happenings to the common damp brownness of ordinary November life in Camden town and there was the nursery floor all bareboards in the middle and brown oil cloth around the outside and the bareness and yellowness of the middle floor showed up the black beetles with terrible distinctness when the poor things came out in the evening as usual to try to make friends with the children but the children never would. The Sunday ended in gloom which even junket for supper in the blue Dresden bowl could hardly lighten at all. Next day the lambs' cough was worse it certainly seemed very hoopy and the doctor came in his brown and carriage everyone tried to bear up under the weight of the sorrow which it was to know that the wishing carpet was locked up and the phoenix mislaid. A good deal of time was spent in looking for the phoenix. It's a bird of its word said Anthea. I'm sure it's not deserted us but you know it had a most awfully long fly from wherever it was to near Rochester and back and I expect the poor things feeling tired out and once rest. I am sure we may trust it. The others tried to feel sure of this too but it was hard. No one could be expected to feel very kindly towards the cook since it was entirely through her making such a fuss about a little foreign mud that the carpet had been taken away. She might have told us said Jane and Panther and I would have cleaned it with tea leaves. She's a cantankerous cat said Robert. I shan't say what I think about her said Anthea primly because it would be evil speaking, lying and slandering. It's not lying to say she's a disagreeable pig and a beastly blue-nosed Boswos said Cyril who had read the eyes of light and intended to talk like Tony as soon as he could teach Robert to talk like Paul. And all the children, even Anthea, agreed that even if she wasn't a blue-nosed Boswos they wished Cook had never been born. But I ask you to believe that they didn't do all the things on purpose which so annoyed the cook during the following week. Though I daresay the things would not have happened if the cook had been a favourite. This is a mystery. Learn it if you can. The things that happened were as follows. Sunday, discovery of foreign mud on both sides of the carpet. Monday, licorice put on to boil with aniseed balls in a saucepan. Anthea did this because she thought it would be good for the lamb's cough. The whole thing forgotten and bottom of saucepan burnt out. It was the little saucepan lined with white that was kept for the baby's milk. Tuesday, a dead mouse found in pantry. Fish slice taken to dig grave with. By regrettable accident fish slice broken. Defence, the cook oughtn't to keep dead mice in pantries. Wednesday, chopped suet left on kitchen table. Robert added chopped soap but he says he thought the suet was soap too. Thursday, broke the kitchen window by falling against it during a perfectly fair game of bandits in the area. Friday, stopped upgrading of kitchen sink with putty and filled sink with water to make a lake to sail paper boats in. Went away and left the tap running. Kitchen, hearth rug and cook's shoes ruined. On Saturday the carpet was restored. There had been plenty of time during the week to decide where it should be asked to go when they did get it back. Mother had gone over to Granny's and had not taken the lamb because he had a bad cough which cook repeatedly said was whooping cough as sure as eggs is eggs. But we'll take him out a ducky darling said enthea. We'll take him somewhere where you can't have whooping cough. Don't be silly Robert if he does talk about it no one will take any notice he's always talking about things he's never seen. So they dressed the lamb and themselves in out of doors clothes and the lamb chuckled and coughed and laughed and coughed again. Poor dear and all the chairs and tables were moved off the carpet by the boys while Jane nursed the lamb and enthea rushed through the house in one last wild hunt for the missing phoenix. It's no use waiting for it she said reappearing breathless in the breakfast room but I know it hasn't deserted us it's a bird of its word. Quite so said the gentle voice of the phoenix from beneath the table. One fell on its knees and looked up and there was the phoenix perched on a crossbar of wood that ran across under the table and had once supported a draw in the happy days before the draw had been used as a boat and its bottom unfortunately trodden out by raggots as really reliable school boots on the feet of Robert. I've been here all the time said the phoenix yawning politely behind its claw. If you wanted me you should have recited the code of invocation. It's seven thousand lines long and written in very pure and beautiful Greek. Couldn't you tell it us in English Ars Aethiah? It's rather long isn't it said Jane jumping the lamb on her knee. Couldn't you make a short English version like Tate and Brady? Oh come along do said Robert holding out his hand. Come along good old phoenix. Good old beautiful phoenix it corrected shyly. Good old beautiful phoenix then. Come along come along said Robert impatiently with his hand still held out. The phoenix fluttered at once onto his wrist. This amiable youth it said to the others has miraculously been able to put the whole meaning of the seven thousand lines of Greek invocation into one English hexameter. A little misplaced some of the words but oh come along come along good old beautiful phoenix not perfect I admit but not bad for a boy of his age well now then said Robert stepping back onto the carpet with the golden phoenix on his wrist you look like the king's falconer said Jane sitting down on the carpet with the baby on her lap Robert tried to go on looking like it Cyril and Anthea stood on the carpet we shall have to get back before dinner said Cyril or cook will blow the gaff she hasn't sneaked since Sunday said Anthea she Robert was beginning when the door burst open and the cook fierce and furious come in like a whirlwind and stood on the corner of the carpet with a broken basin in one hand and a threat in the other which was clenched looky as she cried my only basin and what the powers am I to make the beef steak and kidney pudding in that your ma ordered for your dinners you don't deserve no dinner so you don't I'm awfully sorry cook said Anthea gently it was my fault and I forgot to tell you about it it got broken when we were telling our fortunes with melted lead you know and I meant to tell you meant to tell me replied the cook she was red with anger and really I don't wonder meant to tell well I mean to tell too I've held my tongue this week through because the missus she said to me quiet like we mustn't expect old heads on young shoulders but now I shan't hold it no longer there was the soap you put in our pudding and me and Eliza never so much as breathed it to your ma though well we might and the saucepan and the fish slice and my gracious cats alive what have you got that blessed child dressed up in his outdoors for we aren't going to take him out said Anthea at least she stopped short for though they weren't going to take him out in the Kentish town road they certainly intended to take him elsewhere but not at all where cook meant when she said out this confused the truthful Anthea out said the cook that I'll take care you don't and she snatched the lamb from the lap of Jane while Anthea and Robert caught her by the skirts and apron look here said Cyril in stern desperation will you go away and make your pudding in a pie dish or a flower pot or a hot water can or something not me said the cook briefly and leave this precious poppet for you to give this death a cold to I warn you said Cyril solemnly be aware air yet it be too late late yourself the little popsy wopsy said the cook with angry tenderness they shunt take it out no more they shunt and where did you get that they're yellow foul she pointed to the phoenix even Anthea saw that unless the cook lost her situation the loss would be theirs I wish she said suddenly we were on a sunny southern shore where there can't be any whooping cough she said it through the frightened howls of the lamb and the sturdy scoldings of the cook and instantly the giddy go round and falling lift feeling swept over the whole party and the cook sat down flat on the carpet holding the screaming lamb tight to her stout print covered self and calling on say Bridget to help her she was an Irish woman the moment the tipsy topsy feeling stopped the cook opened her eyes gave one sounding screech and shut them again and Anthea took the opportunity to get the desperately howling lamb into her own arms it's all right she said own paint this got you look at the trees and the sand and the shells and the great big tortoises oh dear how hot it is it certainly was for the trusty carpet had laid itself out on a southern shore that was sunny and no mistake as Robert remarked the greenest of green slopes led up to glorious groves where palm trees and all the tropical flowers and fruits that you read of in westward hoe and fair play were growing in rich profusion between the green green slope and the blue blue sea lay a stretch of sand that looked like a carpet of jeweled cloth of gold for it was not grayish as our northern sand is but yellow and changing opal colored like sunshine and rainbows and at the very moment when the wild whirling blinding deafening tumbling upside down as of the carpet moving stopped the children had the happiness of seeing three large life turtles waddle down to the edge of the sea and disappear in the water and it was hotter than you can possibly imagine unless you think of ovens on a baking day everyone without an instance hesitation tore off its London in November outdoor clothes and Anthea took off the lambs highwayman bluecoat and his three-cornered hat and then his jersey and then the lamb himself suddenly slipped out of his little blue tight breeches and stood up happy and hot in his little white shirt I'm sure it's much warmer than the seaside in the summer said Anthea mother always lets us go barefoot then so the lambs shoes and socks and gaiters came off and he stood digging his happy naked pink toes into the golden smooth sand I'm a little white duck dicky said he a little white duck dickie that swims and splashed quacking into a sandy pool let him said Anthea it can't hurt him oh how hot it is the cook suddenly opened her eyes and screamed shut them screamed again opened her eyes once more and said why drag my cats alive what's all this it's a dream I expect well it's the best I ever dreamed I'll look it up in the dream book tomorrow seaside and trees and a carpet to sit on I never did look here said Cyril it isn't a dream it's real oh yes said cook they always says that in dreams it's real I tell you Robert said stamping his foot I'm not going to tell you how it's done because that's our secret he winked heavily at each of the others in turn but you wouldn't go away and make that pudding so we had to bring you and I hope you like it I do that and no mistake said the cook unexpectedly and it being a dream it don't matter what I say and I will say if it's my last word that of all the aggravating little varmints calm yourself my good woman said the phoenix good woman indeed said the cook good woman yourself then she saw who it was that had spoken well if I ever she said this is something like a dream yellow fowls are talking and all I've heard of such but never did I think to see the day well then said Cyril impatiently sit here and see the day now it's a jolly fine day here you others a council they walked along the shore till they were out of earshot of the cook who still sat gazing about her with a happy dreamy vacant smile look here said Cyril we must roll the carpet up and hide it so that we can get at it at any moment the lamb can be getting rid of his whooping cough all the morning and we can look about and if the savages on this island are cannibals we'll hook it and take her back and if not we'll leave her here is that being kind to servants and animals like the clergyman said asked Jane nor she isn't kind retorted Cyril well anyway said anthea the safest thing is to leave the carpet there with her sitting on it perhaps it'll be a lesson to her and anyway if she thinks it's a dream it won't matter what she says when she gets home so the extra coats and hats and mufflers were piled on the carpet Cyril shouldered the well and happy lamb the phoenix perched on Robert's wrist and the party of explorers prepared to enter the interior the grassy slope was smooth but under the trees there were tangled creepers with bright strange shaped flowers and it was not easy to walk we ought to have an explorer's axe said Robert I shall ask father to give me one for Christmas there were curtains of creepers with centred blossoms hanging from the trees and brilliant birds darted about quite close to their faces now tell me honestly said the phoenix are there any birds here handsomer than I am don't be afraid of hurting my feelings I'm a modest bird I hope not one of them said Robert with conviction is a patch upon you I was never a vain bird said the phoenix but I own that you confirm my own impression I will take a flight it circled in the air for a moment and returning to Robert's wrist went on there is a path to the left and there was so now the children went on through the wood more quickly and comfortably the girls picking flowers and the lamb inviting the pretty dickies to observe that he himself was a little white real water wet duck and all this time he hadn't whooping coughed once the path turned and twisted and always threading their way a meter tangler flowers the children suddenly passed a corner and found themselves in a forest clearing where there were a lot of pointed huts the huts as they knew at once of savages the boldest heart beat more quickly suppose they were cannibals it was a long way back to the carpet how don't we better go back said Jane go now she said and her voice trembled a little suppose they eat us nonsense pussy said Cyril firmly look there's a goat tied up that shows they don't eat people let's go on and say we missionaries Robert suggested I shouldn't advise that said the phoenix very earnestly why not well for one thing it isn't true replied the golden bird it was while they stood hesitating on the edge of the clearing that a tall man suddenly came out of one of the huts he had hardly any clothes and his body all over was a dark and beautiful coppery color just like the chrysanthemums father had brought home on Saturday in his hand he held a spear the whites of his eyes and the white of his teeth were the only light things about him except that where the sun shone on his shiny brown body it looked white too if you will look carefully at the next shiny savage you meet with next to nothing on you will see it once if the sun happens to be shining at the time that I am right about this the savage looked at the children concealment was impossible he uttered a shout that was more like than anything else the children had ever heard and at once brown coppery people leapt out of every hut and swarmed like ants about the clearing there was no time for discussion and no one wanted to discuss anything anyhow whether these coppery people were cannibals or not now seemed to matter very little without an instant's hesitation the four children turned and ran back along the forest path the only pause was ampheus she stood back to let Cyril pass because he was carrying the lamb who screamed with delight he had not whooping coughed a single once since the carpet landed him on the island gee up squirrel gee gee he shouted and Cyril did gee up the path was a shorter cut to the beach than the creeper covered way by which they had come and almost directly they saw through the trees the shining blue and gold and opal of sand and sea stick to it cried Cyril breathlessly they did stick to it they tore down the sands they could hear behind them as they ran the patter of feet which they knew too well were copper coloured the sands were golden and opal coloured and bear there were wreaths of tropic seaweed there were rich tropic shells of the kind you would not buy in the kentish town road under at least 15 pence a pair there were turtles basking lumpily on the water's edge but no cook no clothes and no carpet on on into the sea gas Cyril they must hate water I've heard savages always dirty their feet were splashing in the warm shallows before his breathless words were ended the calm baby waves were easy to go through it is warm work running for your life in the tropics and the coolness of the water was delicious they were up to their armpits now and Jane was up to her chin look said the phoenix what are they pointing at the children turned and there a little to the west was a head a head they knew with a crooked cap upon it it was the head of the cook for some reason or other the savages had stopped at the water's edge and we're all talking at the top of their voices and all were pointing copper coloured fingers stiff with interest and excitement at the head of the cook the children hurried toward her as quickly as the water would let them what on earth did you come out here for Robert shouted and where on earth's the carpet it's not on earth bless you replied the cook happily it's under me in the water I got a bit warm setting there in the sun and I just says I wish I was in a cold bath just like that and next minute here I was it's all part of the dream everyone at once saw how extremely fortunate it was that the carpet it had the sense to take the cook to the nearest and largest bath the sea and how terrible it would have been if the carpet had taken itself and her to the stuffy little bathroom of the house in Camden town excuse me said the phoenix soft voice breaking in on the general sigh of relief but I think these brown people want your cook to to eat whisper Jane as well as she could through the water which the plunging lamb was stashing in her face with happy fat hands and feet hardly rejoined the bird who wants cooks to eat cooks are engaged not eaten they wish to engage her how can you understand what they say ask you or doubtfully it's as easy as kissing your claw replied the bird I speak and understand all languages even that of your cook which is difficult and unpleasing it's quite easy when you know how it's done it just comes to you I should advise you to beach the carpet and land the cargo the cook I mean you can take my word for it the copper colored ones will not harm you now it is impossible not to take the word of a phoenix when it tells you to so the children at once got hold of the corners of the carpet and pulling it from under the cook towed it slowly in through the shallowing water and at last spread it on the sand the cook who had followed instantly sat down on it and at once the copper colored natives now strangely humbled formed a ring round the carpet and fell on their faces on the rainbow and gold sand the tallest savage spoke in this position which must have been very awkward for him and Jane noticed that it took him quite a long time to get the sand out of his mouth afterwards he says the phoenix remarked after some time that they wish to engage your cook permanently without a character as anthia who had heard her mother speak of such things they do not wish to engage her as a cook but as queen and queens need not have characters there was a breathless pause well said zero of all the choices but there's no accounting for tastes everyone laughed at the idea of the cooks being engaged as queen they could not help it I do not advise laughter warned the phoenix ruffling out his golden feathers which were extremely wet and it's not their own choice it seems that there is an ancient prophecy of this copper colored tribe that a great queen should someday arise out of the sea with a white crown on her head and and well you see there's the crown it pointed its claw at the cook's cap and a very dirty cap it was because it was the end of the week that's the white crown it said at least it's nearly white very white indeed compared to the color they are and anyway it's quite white enough Cyril addressed the cook look here said he these brown people want you to be their queen they're only savages and they don't know any better now would you really like to stay or if you promise not to be so jolly aggravating at home and not to tell anyone a word about today will take you back to Camden town no you don't said the cook in firm undoubting tones I've always wanted to be the queen God bless her and I always thought what a good one I should make and now I'm going to if it's only in a dream it's well worthwhile and I don't go back to that nasty underground kitchen and me blamed for everything that I don't not till the dreams finished and I wake up with that nasty Bella rang tanging in my ears so I tell you are you sure and you anxiously asked the phoenix that she will be quite safe here she will find the nest of a queen a very precious and soft thing said the bird Sonamly there you hear said Cyril you're in for a precious soft thing so mind you're a good queen cook it's more than you any right to expect but long may you rain some of the cook's copper colored subjects now advanced from the forest with long garlands of beautiful flowers white and sweet-centred and hung them respectfully round the neck of the new sovereign what all them lovely boat case for me exclaimed the enraptured cook well this here is something like a dream I must say she sat up very straight on the carpet and the copper colored ones themselves reathed in garlets of the gayest flowers madly stuck parrot feathers in their hair and began to dance it was a dance such as you have never seen it made the children feel almost sure that the cook was right and that they were all in a dream small strange shaped drums were beaten odd sounding songs were sung and the dance got faster and faster and otter and otter till at last all the dancers fell on the sand tied out the new queen with her white crown cap all on one side clapped wildly bravo she cried bravo it's better than the Albert Edward music hall in the Kentish town road go it again but the phoenix would not translate this request into the copper colored language and when the savages had recovered their breath they implored their queen to leave her white escort and come with them to their huts the finest shall be yours oh queen they said well so long said the cook getting heavily onto her feet when the phoenix had translated this request no more kitchens and addicts for me thank you I'm off to my royal palace I am and I only wish this here dream would keep on forever and ever she picked up the ends of the garlands that trailed round her feet and the children had one last glimpse of her striped stockings and worn elastic side boots before she disappeared into the shadows of the forest surrounded by her dusky retainers singing songs of rejoicing as they went well said Cyril I suppose she's all right but they don't seem to count us for much one way or the other oh said the phoenix they think you're merely dreams the prophecy said that the queen would arise from the waves with a white crown and surrounded by white dream children that's about what they think you are and what about dinner said Robert abruptly there won't be any dinner with no cook and no pudding basin and they reminded him but there's always bread and butter let's go home said Cyril the lamb was furiously unwishful to be dressed in his warm clothes again but Anthea and Jane managed it by force disguised as coaxing and he never once whooping coughed then everyone put on its own warm things and took its place on the carpet a sound of uncouth singing still came from beyond the trees where the copper-colored natives were crooning songs of admiration and respect to their white crowned queen then Anthea said home just as duchesses and other people do to their coachmen and the intelligent carpet in one whirling moment laid itself down in its proper place on the nursery floor and at that very moment Eliza opened the door and said cooks gone I can't find her anywhere and there's no dinner ready she hasn't taken her box nor yet her outdoor things she just ran out to see the time I shouldn't wonder the kitchen clock never did give her satisfaction and she's got run over or fell down in a fit as likely as not you'll have to put out with the cold bacon for your dinners and what on earth you've got your outdoor things on for I don't know and then I'll slip out and see if they know anything about her at the police station but nobody ever knew anything about the cook anymore except the children and later one other person mother was so upset at losing the cook and so anxious about her that Anthea felt almost miserable as though she had done something very wrong indeed she woke several times in the night and at last decided that she would ask the phoenix to let her tell her mother all about it but there was no opportunity to do this next day because the phoenix as usual had gone to sleep in some out-of-the-way spot after asking as a special favor not to be disturbed for 24 hours the lamb never whooping coughed once all that Sunday and mother and father said what good medicine it was that the doctor had given him but the children knew that it was the southern shore where you can't have whooping cough that had cured him the lamb babbled of coloured sand and water but no one took any notice of that he often talked to things that hadn't happened it was on Monday morning very early indeed that Anthea woke and suddenly made up her mind she crept downstairs in her night gown it was very chilly sat down on the carpet and with a beating heart wished herself on the sunny shore where you can't have whooping cough and next moment there she was the sand was splendidly warm she could feel it at once even through the carpet she folded the carpet and put it over her shoulders like a shawl for she was determined not to be parted from it for a single instant no matter how hot it might be to wear then trembling a little and trying to keep up her courage by saying over and over it is my duty it is my duty she went up the forest path well here you are again said the cook directly as she saw Anthea this dream to us keep on the cook was dressed in a white robe she had no shoes and stockings and no cap and she was sitting under a screen of palm leaves for it was afternoon in the island and blazing hot she wore a flower wreath on her hair and copper-coloured boys were fanning her with peacock's feathers they've got the cap put away she said they seemed to think a lot of it never saw one before I expect are you happy us Anthea panting the sight of the cook as Queen quite took her breath away I believe you my dear said the cook heartily nothing to do unless you want to but I'm getting rested now tomorrow I'm going to start cleaning out my hut if the dream keeps on and I shall teach them cooking they burns everything to a cinder now unless they eats it raw but can you talk to them law lover duck yes the happy cook Queen replied it's quite easy to pick up I always thought I should be quick at foreign languages I've taught them to understand dinner and I want a drink and you leave me be already then you don't want anything and they asked earnestly and anxiously not me miss except if you'd only go away I'm afraid of me waking up with that bell are going if you keep on stopping here are talking to me long as this here dream keeps up I'm as happy as a queen goodbye then said anthea gaily for her conscience was clear now she hurried into the wood threw herself on the ground and said home and there she was rolled in the carpet of the nursery floor she's all right anyhow said anthea and went back to bed I'm glad somebody's pleased but mother will never believe me when I tell her the story is indeed a little difficult to believe still you might try end of chapter 3 the Queen cook chapter 4 of the Phoenix in the carpet this is a LibriVox recording all LibriVox recordings are in the public domain for more information or to volunteer please visit LibriVox.org recording by Kay Hindel the Phoenix in the carpet by E. Nespot chapter 4 two bazaars mother was really a great dear she was pretty and she was loving and most frightfully good when you were ill and always kind and almost always just that is she was just when she understood things but of course she did not always understand things no one always understands everything and mothers are not angels though a good many of them come pretty near it the children knew that mother always wanted to do what was best for them even if she was not clever enough to know exactly what was the best that was why all of them but much more particularly and Thea felt rather uncomfortable keeping the great secret from her of the wishing carpet and the Phoenix and and Thea whose inside mind was made so that she was able to be much more uncomfortable than the others had decided that she must tell her mother the truth however little likely it was that her mother would believe it and then I shall have done what's right she said to the Phoenix and if she doesn't believe me it won't be my fault will it not in the least said the golden bird and she won't so you're quite safe and Thea chose a time when she was doing her home lessons they were algebra and Latin German English and Euclid and she asked her mother whether she might come and do them in the drawing room so as to be quiet she said to her mother and to herself she said and that's not the real reason I hope I shan't grow up a liar mother said of course dairy and and thea started swimming through a sea of X's and Y's and Z's mother was sitting at the mahogany Bureau writing letters mother dear said and Thea yes love a duck said mother about cook said and Thea I know where she is do you dear said mother well I wouldn't take her back after the way she has behaved it's not her fault said and Thea may I tell you about it from the beginning mother laid down her pen and her nice face had a resigned expression as you know a resigned expression always makes you want not to tell anybody anything it's like this said and Thea in a hurry that egg you know that came in the carpet we put it in the fire and it hatched into the phoenix and the carpet was a wishing carpet and a very nice game darling said mother taking up her pen now do be quiet I've got a lot of letters to write I'm going to Bournemouth tomorrow with the lamb and there's that bizarre and Thea went back to X Y and Z and mother's pen scratched busily but mother said and Thea when mother put down the pen to lick an envelope the carpet takes us wherever we like and I wish it would take you where you could get a few nice eastern things for my bizarre said mother I promise them and I've no time to go to liberties now it shall said and Thea but mother well dear said her mother a little impatiently for she had taken up her pen again the carpet took us to a place where you couldn't have whooping cough and the lamb hasn't whooped since and we took cook because she was so tiresome and then she would stay and be queen of the savages they thought her cap was a crown and darling one said mother you know I love to hear the things you make up but I am most awfully busy but it's true said and Thea desperately you shouldn't say that my sweet said mother gently and then and Thea knew it was hopeless are you going away for long asked and Thea I've got a cold said mother and daddy's anxious about it and the lambs cough he hasn't cough since Saturday the lambs elder sister interrupted I wish I could think so mother replied and daddy's got to go to Scotland I do hope you'll be good children we will we will said and Thea fervently when's the bizarre on Saturday said mother at the schools oh don't talk anymore there's a treasure my head's going round and I've forgotten how to spell whooping cough mother and the lamb went away and father went away and there was a new cook who looks so like a frightened rabbit that no one had the heart to do anything to frighten her anymore than seem natural to her the Phoenix beg to be excused it said it wanted a week's rest and asked that it might not be disturbed and it hid its golden gleaming self and nobody could find it so that when Wednesday afternoon brought an unexpected holiday and everyone decided to go somewhere on the carpet the journey had to be undertaken without the Phoenix they were debarred from any carpet excursions in the evening by a sudden promise to mother exacted in the agitation of parting that they would not be out after six at night except on Saturday when they were to go to the bazaar and were pledged to put on their best clothes to wash themselves to the utter most and to clean their nails not with scissors which are scratchy and bad but with flat sharpened ends of wooden matches which do no harm to anyone's nails let's go and see the lamb said Jane but everyone was agreed that if they appeared suddenly in Bournemouth it would frighten mother out of her wits if not into a fit so they sat on the carpet and thought and thought and thought till they almost began to squint look here said Cyril I know please carpet take us somewhere where we can see the lamb and mother and no one can see us except the lamb said Jane quickly and the next moment they found themselves recovering from the upside down movement and they were sitting on the carpet and the carpet was laid out over another thick soft carpet of brown pine needles there were green pine trees overhead and a swift clear little stream that was running as fast as ever it could between steep banks and there sitting on the pine needle carpet was mother without her hat and the sun was shining brightly although it was November and there was the lamb as jolly as jolly and not whooping at all the carpets deceived us said Robert gloomily mother will see us directly she turns her head but the faithful carpet had not deceived them mother turned her dear head and looked straight at them and did not see them we're invisible Cyril whispered what awful larks but to the girls it was not larks at all it was horrible to have mother looking straight at them and her face keeping the same just as though they weren't there I don't like it said Jane mother never looked at us like that before just as if she didn't love us as if we were somebody else's children and not very nice ones either as if she didn't care whether she saw us or not it is horrid said anthea almost in tears but at this moment the lamb saw them and plunged towards the carpet shrieking panty own panty and pussy and squiggle and bobs oh oh and Thea caught him and kissed him so did Jane they could not help it he looked such a darling with his blue three-cornered hat all on one side and his precious face all dirty quite in the old familiar way I love you panty I love you and you and you and you cried the lamb it was a delicious moment even the boys thumped their baby brother joyously on the back then and Thea glanced at mother and mother's face was a pale sea green color and she was staring at the lamb as if she thought he had gone mad and indeed that was exactly what she did think my lamb my precious come to mother she cried and jumped up and ran to the baby she was so quick that the invisible children had to leap back or she would have felt them and to feel what you can't see is the worst sort of ghost feeling mother picked up the lamb and hurried away from the pinewood let's go home said Jane after a miserable silence it feels just exactly as if mother didn't love us but they couldn't bear to go home till they had seen mother meet another lady and knew that she was safe you cannot leave your mother to go green in the face in a distant pinewood far from all human aid and then go home on your wishing carpet as though nothing had happened when mother seems safe the children returned to the carpet and said home and home they went I don't care about being invisible myself said Cyril at least not with my own family it would be different if you were a prince or a bandit or a burglar and now the thoughts of all four dwelt fondly on the dear greenish face of mother I wish she hadn't gone away said Jane the house is simply beastly without her I think we ought to do what she said and the a put in I saw something in a book the other day about the wishes of the departed being sacred that means when they've departed farther off said Cyril India's coral or Greenland's icy don't you know not Bournemouth besides we don't know what her wishes are she said and the a was very much inclined to cry she said get Indian things for my bizarre but I know she thought we couldn't and it was only play let's get them all the same said Robert we'll go the first thing on Saturday morning and on Saturday morning the first thing they went there was no finding the phoenix so they sat on the beautiful wishing carpet and said we want Indian things for mother's bizarre will you please take us where people will give us heaps of Indian things the docile carpets swirled their senses away and restored them on the outskirts of a gleaming white Indian town they knew it was Indian at once by the shape of the domes and roofs and besides a man went by on an elephant and two English soldiers went along the road talking like in Mr. Kipling's books so after that no one could have had any doubt as to where they were they rolled up the carpet and Robert carried it and they walked bodily into the town it was very warm and once more they had to take off their London and November coats and carry them on their arms the streets were narrow and strange and the clothes of the people in the streets were stranger and the talk of the people was strangest of all I can't understand a word said Cyril how on earth are we to ask for things for our bizarre and their poor people too said Jane I'm sure they are what we want is a raja or something Robert was beginning to unroll the carpet but the others stopped him imploring and not to waste a wish we asked the carpet to take us where we could get Indian things for bazaars said anthea and it will her faith was justified just as she finished speaking a very brown gentleman in a turban came up to them and bowed deeply he spoke and they thrilled the sound of English words my Ronnie she think you very nice childs she asks do you lose yourselves and do you desire to sell carpet she see you from her polky you come see her yes they followed the stranger who seemed to have a great many more teeth than a smile than our usual and he led them through crooked streets to the Ronnie's palace I'm not going to describe the Ronnie's palace because I really have never seen the palace of a Ronnie and Mr Kipling has so you can read about it in his books but I know exactly what happened there the old Ronnie sat on a low cushion seat and there were a lot of other ladies with her all in trousers and veils and sparkling with tinsel and gold and jewels and the brown turban gentleman stood behind a sort of carved screen and interpreted what the children said and what the queen said and when the queen asked to buy the carpet the children said no why asked the Ronnie and Jane briefly said why and the interpreter interpreted the queen spoke and then the interpreter said my mistress says it is a good story and you tell it all through without thought of time and they had to it made a long story especially as it had all to be told twice once by Cyril and once by the interpreter Cyril rather enjoyed himself he warmed to his work and told the tale of the phoenix in the carpet and the lone tower and the queen cook in language that grew insensibly more and more Arabian nightsy and the Ronnie and her ladies listened to the interpreter and rolled about on their fat cushions with laughter when the story was ended she spoke and the interpreter explained that she had said little one Thou art a heaven-born teller of tales and she threw him a string of turquoises from around her neck oh how lovely cried Jane and anthea Cyril bowed several times then cleared his throat and said thank her very very much but I would much rather she gave me some of the cheap things in the bazaar teller I want them to sell again and give the money to buy clothes for poor people who haven't any tell him he has my leave to sell my gift and clothe the naked with its price at the queen when this was translated but Cyril said very firmly no thank you the things have got to be sold today at our bazaar and no one would buy a turquoise necklace at an English bazaar they'd think it was sham or else they'd want to know where we got it so then the queen sent out for a little pretty things and her servants piled the carpet with them I must need lend you an elephant to carry them away she said laughing but anthea said if the queen will lend us a comb and let us wash our hands and faces she shall see a magic thing we in the carpet and all these brass trays and pots and carved things and stuffs and things will just vanish away like smoke the queen clapped her hands at this idea and lent the children a sandalwood comb inlaid with ivory lotus flowers and they washed their faces and hands in silver basins then Cyril made a very polite farewell speech and quite suddenly he ended with the words and I wish we were at the bazaar at our schools and of course they were and the queen and her ladies were left with their mouths open gazing at the bare space on the inlaid marble floor where the carpet and the children had been that is magic if ever magic was said the queen delighted with the incident which indeed has given the ladies of that court something to talk about on wet days ever since Cyril's stories had taken some time so had the meal of strange sweet foods that they had had while the little pretty things were being bought and the gas in the school room was already lighted outside the winter dusk was stealing down among the candid townhouses I'm glad we got washed in India said Cyril we should have been awfully late if we'd had to go home and scrub besides Robert said it's much warmer washing in India I shouldn't mind it so much if we live there the thoughtful carpet had dumped the children down in a dusky space behind the point where the corners of two stalls met the floor was littered with string and brown paper and baskets and boxes were heaped along the wall the children crept out under a stall covered with all sorts of table covers and mats and things embroidered beautifully by idle ladies with no real work to do they got out at the end displacing a sideboard cloth adorned with a tasteful pattern of blue geraniums the girls got out unobserved and so did Cyril but Robert as he cautiously emerged was actually walked on by mrs. Biddle who kept the stall her large solid foot stood firmly on the small solid hand of Robert and who can blame Robert if he did yell a little a crowd instantly collected yells are very unusual at bazaars and everyone was intensely interested it was several seconds before the three free children could make mrs. Biddle understand that what she was walking on was not a school room floor or even as she presently supposed a dropped pin cushion but the living hand of a suffering child when she became aware that she really had hurt him she grew very angry indeed when people have hurt other people by accident the one who does the hurting is always much the angriest i wonder why i am very sorry i'm sure said mrs. Biddle but she spoke more in anger than in sorrow come out whatever do you mean by creeping about under the stalls like earwigs we were looking at the things in the corner such nasty prying ways said mrs. Biddle will never make you successful in life there's nothing there but packing in dust oh isn't there said jane that's all you know little girl don't be rude said mrs. Biddle flushing violet she doesn't mean to be but there are some nice things there all the same said Cyril who suddenly felt how impossible it was to inform the listening crowd that all the treasures piled on the carpet were mother's contributions to the bazaar no one would believe it and if they did and wrote to thank mother she would think well goodness only knew what she would think the other three children felt the same i should like to see them said a very nice lady whose friends had disappointed her and hoped that these might be belated contributions to her poorly furnished stall she looked inquiringly at robert who said with pleasure don't mention it and dived back under mrs. Biddle's stall i wonder you encourage such behavior said mrs. Biddle i always speak my mind as you know mrs. P smarsh and i must say i am surprised she turned to the crowd there is no entertainment here she said sternly a very naughty little boy has accidentally hurt himself but only slightly will you please disperse it will only encourage him in naughtiness if he finds himself the center of attraction the crowd slowly dispersed anthea speechless with fury heard a nice curate say poor little beggar and loved the curate at once and forever then robert wriggled out from under the stall with some benares brass and some inlaid sandalwood boxes liberty cried miss p smarsh then charles has not forgotten after all excuse me said mrs. Biddle with fierce politeness these objects are deposited behind my stall some unknown donor who does goodbye stealth and would blush if he could hear you claim the things of course they are for me my stall touches yours at the corner said poor miss p smarsh timidly and my cousin did promise the children sidled away from the unequal contest and mingled with the crowd their feelings were too deep for words till at last robert said that stiff-starched pig and after all our trouble i'm hoarse with gassing to that trouser lady in india the pig ladies very very nasty said jane it was anthea who said in a hurry to undertone she isn't very nice and miss p smarsh is pretty and nice too who's got a pencil it was a long crawl under three stalls but anthea did it a large piece of pale blue paper lay among the rubbish in the corner she folded it into a square and wrote upon it licking the pencil at every word to make it mark quite blackly all these indian things are for pretty nice miss p smarsh's stall she thought of adding there is nothing for mrs. Biddle but she saw that this might lead to suspicion so she wrote hastily from an unknown donna and crept back among the boards and trestles to join the others so that when mrs. Biddle appealed to the bazaar committee and the corner of the stall was lifted and shifted so that stout clergyman and heavy ladies could get to the corner without creeping under stalls the blue paper was discovered and all the splendid shining indian things were given over to miss p smarsh and she sold them all and got 35 pounds for them i don't understand about that blue paper said mrs. Biddle it looks to me like the work of a lunatic and saying you are nice and pretty it's not the work of a sane person anthea and jane begged miss p smarsh to let them help her to sell the things because it was their brother who had announced the good news that the things had come miss p smarsh was very willing for now her stall that had been so neglected was surrounded by people who wanted to buy and she was glad to be helped the children noted that mrs. Biddle had not more to do in the way of selling than she could manage quite well i hope they were not glad for you should forgive your enemies even if they walk on your hands and then say it is all your naughty fault but i am afraid they were not so sorry as they ought to have been it took some time to arrange the things on the stall the carpet was spread over it and the dark color showed up the brass and silver and ivory things it was a happy and busy afternoon and when miss p smarsh and the girls had sold every single one of the little pretty things from the indian bazaar far far away and the and jane went off with the boys to fish in the fish pond and dive into the brand pie and hear the cardboard band and the phonograph and the chorus of singing birds that was done behind a screen with glass tubes and glasses of water they had a beautiful tea suddenly presented to them by the nice curate and miss p smarsh joined them before they had had more than three cakes each it was a merry party and the curate was extremely pleasant everyone even to miss p smarsh as jane said afterwards we ought to get back to the stall said anthea when no one could possibly eat anymore and the curate was talking in a low voice to miss p smarsh about after easter there's nothing to go back for said miss p smarsh gaily thanks to you dear children we've sold everything there's there's the carpet said siril oh said miss p smarsh radiantly don't bother about the carpet i've sold even that mrs. bittle gave me ten shillings for it she said it would do for her servant's bedroom why said jane her servants don't have carpets we had cooked from her and she told us so no scandal about queen elizabeth if you please said the curate cheerfully and miss p smarsh laughed and looked at him as though she had never dreamed that anyone could be so amusing but the others were struck dumb how could they say the carpet is ours for who brings carpets to bazaars the children were now thoroughly wretched but i am glad to say that their wretchedness did not make them forget their manners as it does sometimes even with grown-up people who ought to know ever so much better they said thank you very much for the jolly tea and thanks for being so jolly and thanks awfully for giving us such a jolly time for the curate had stood fish ponds and brand pies and phonographs and the course of singing birds and it stood them like a man and the girls hugged miss p smarsh and as they went away they heard the curate say jolly little kids yes but what about will you let it be directly after easter ah do say you will and jane ran back and said before anthea could drag her away what are you going to do after easter miss p smarsh smiled and looked very pretty indeed and the curate said i hope i am going to take a trip to the fortunate islands i wish we could take you on the wishing carpet said jane thank you said the curate but i'm afraid i can't wait for that i must go to the fortunate islands before they make me a bishop i should have no time afterwards i've always thought that i should marry a bishop said jane his aprons would come in so useful wouldn't you like to marry a bishop miss p smarsh it was then that they dragged her away as it was robert's hand that mrs. bittle had walked on it was decided that he had better not recall the incident to our mind and so make her angry again and thea and jane had helped to sell the things that the rival stole so they were not likely to be popular a hasty council of four decided that mrs. bittle would hate saro less than she would hate the others so the others mingled with the crowd and it was he who said to her mrs. bittle we meant to have that carpet would you sell it to us we would give you certainly not said mrs. bittle go away little boy there was that in her tone which showed seral all too plainly the hopelessness of persuasion he found the others and said it's no use she's like a lioness robbed of its puppies we must watch where it goes and and thea i don't care what you say it's our own carpet it wouldn't be burglary it would be a sort of forlorn hope rescue party heroic and daring and dashing and not wrong at all the children still wandered among the gay crowd but there was no pleasure there for them anymore the chorus of singing birds sounded just like glass tubes being blown through water and the phonograph simply made a horrid noise so that you could hardly hear yourself speak and the people were buying things they couldn't possibly want and it all seemed very stupid and mrs. bittle had bought the wishing carpet for ten shillings and the whole of life was sad and gray and dusty and smelt of slight gas escapes and hot people and cake and crumbs and all the children were very tired indeed they found a corner within side of the carpet and there they waited miserably till it was far beyond their proper bedtime and when it was ten the people who had bought things went away but the people who had been selling stayed to count up their money and to jaw about it said robert i'll never go to another bazaar as long as i live my hand is swollen as big as a pudding i expect the nails in her horrible boots were poisoned just then someone who seemed to have a right to interfere said everything is over now you had better go home so they went and they waited on the pavement under the gas lamp where ragged children had been standing all evening to listen to the band and their feet slipped about in the greasy mud till mrs. bittle came out and was driven away in a cab with the many things she hadn't sold and the few things she had bought among others the carpet the other stall holders left their things at the school till monday morning but mrs. bittle was afraid someone would steal some of them so she took them in a cab the children now too desperate to care for mud or appearances hung on behind the cab till it reached mrs. bittle's house when she and the carpet had gone in and the door was shut and thea said don't let's burgle i mean do daring and dashing rescue acts till we've given her a chance let's ring and ask to see her the others hated to do this but at last they agreed on condition that anthea would not make any silly fuss about the burglary afterwards if it really had to come to that so they knocked and rang and a scared looking parlor maid opened the front door while they were asking for mrs. bittle they saw her she was in the dining room and she had already pushed back the table and spread out the carpet to see how it looked on the floor i knew she didn't want it for her servant's bedroom jane muttered anthea walked straight past the uncomfortable parlor maid and the others followed her mrs. bittle had her back to them and was smoothing down the carpet with the same boot that had trampled on the hand of robert so that they were all in the room and siril with great presence of mind had shut the door before she saw them who is it jane she asked in a sour voice and turning suddenly she saw who it was once more her face grew violet a deep dark violet you wicked daring little things she cried how dare you come here at this time of night to be off or i'll send for the police don't be angry said anthea soothingly we only wanted to ask you to let us have the carpet we have quite 12 shillings between us and how dare you cried mrs. bittle and her voice shook with angriness you do look horrid said jane suddenly mrs. bittle actually stamped that booted front of hers you rude bare-faced child she said anthea almost shook jane but jane pushed forward in spite of her it really is our nursery carpet she said you can ask anyone if it isn't let's wish ourselves home said siril in a whisper no go robert whispered back she'd be there too and raving mad as likely as not horrid thing i hate her i wish mrs. bittle was in an angelic good temper cried anthea suddenly it's worth trying she said to herself mrs. bittle's face grew from purple to violet and from violet to mauve and from mauve to pink then she smiled quite a jolly smile why so i am she said what a funny idea why shouldn't i be in a good temper my dears once more the carpet had done its work and not on mrs. bittle alone the children felt suddenly good and happy you're a jolly good sort said siril i see that now i'm sorry we vexed you with the bazaar today not another word said the changed mrs. bittle of course you shall have the carpet my dears if you've taken such a fancy to it no no i won't have more than the ten shillings i paid it does seem hard to ask you for it after you bought it at the bazaar said anthea but it really is our nursery carpet it got to the bazaar by mistake with some other things did it really now how vexing said mrs. bittle kindly well my dears i can very well give the extra ten shillings so you can take your carpet and we'll say no more about it have a piece of cake before you go i'm so sorry i stepped on your hand my boy is it all right now yes thank you said robert i say you are good not at all said mrs. bittle heartily i'm delighted to be able to give any little pleasure to you dear children and she helped them to roll up the carpet and the boys carried it away between them you are a dear said anthea and she and mrs. bittle kissed each other heartily well said cirrell as they went along the street yes said robert and the odd part is that you feel just as if it was real her being so jolly i mean and not only the carpet making her nice perhaps it is real said anthea only it was covered up with crossness and tiredness and things and the carpet took them away i hope it'll keep them away said jane she isn't ugly at all when she laughs the carpet has done many wonders in its day but the case of mrs. bittle is i think the most wonderful from that day she was never anything like so disagreeable as she was before and she sent a lovely silver teapot and a kind letter to miss p's marsh when the pretty lady married the nice curate just after easter it was and they went to italy for their honeymoon end of chapter four recording by k hindle ifica new york may 2008 chapter five of the phoenix and the carpet this is a libra vox recording all libra vox recordings are in the public domain for more information or to volunteer please visit libra vox dot org recording by k hindle with an advance apology for the butchering of cockney the phoenix and the carpet by e nesbit chapter five the temple i wish we could find the phoenix said jane it's much better company than the carpet beastly ungrateful little kids are said zero no i'm not only the carpet never says anything and it's so helpless it doesn't seem able to take care of itself it gets sold and taken into the sea and things like that you wouldn't catch the phoenix getting sold it was two days after the bazaar everyone was a little cross some days are like that usually mondays by the way and this was a monday i shouldn't wonder if your precious phoenix had gone off for good said zero and i don't know that i blame it look at the weather it's not worth looking at said robert and indeed it wasn't the phoenix hasn't gone i'm sure it hasn't said anthea i'll have another look for it anthea looked under tables and chairs and in boxes and baskets in mother's work bag and father's portmanteau but still the phoenix showed not so much as the tip of one shining feather then suddenly robert remembered how the whole of the greek invocation song of seven thousand lines had been condensed by him into one english hexameter so he stood on the carpet and enchanted oh come along come along you good old beautiful phoenix and almost at once there was a rustle of wings down the kitchen stairs and the phoenix sailed in on wide gold wings where on earth have you been said anthea i've looked everywhere for you not everywhere replied the bird because you did not look in the place where i was confess that that hallowed spot was overlooked by you what hallowed spot asked seril a little impatiently for time was hastening on in the wishing carpet still idle the spot said the phoenix which i hallowed by my golden presence was the leutron the what the bath the place of washing i'm sure you weren't said jane i looked there three times and moved all the towels i was concealed said the phoenix on the summit of a metal column enchanted i should judge for it felt warm to my golden toes as though the glorious son of the desert shown ever upon it oh you mean the cylinder said seril it has a rather comforting feel this weather and now where shall we go and then of course the usual discussion broke out as to where they should go and what they should do and naturally everyone wanted to do something that the others did not care about i am the eldest seril remarked let's go to the north pole this weather likely robert rejoined let's go to the equator i think the diamond minds of gulkanda would be nice said anthea don't you agree jane no i don't retorted jane i don't agree with you i don't agree with anybody the phoenix raised a warning claw if you cannot agree among yourselves i fear i shall have to leave you it said well where shall we go you decide said all if i were you said the bird thoughtfully i should give the carpet a rest besides you'll lose the use of your legs if you go everywhere by carpet can't you take me out and explain your ugly city to me we will if it clears up said robert enthusiasm just look at the rain and why should we give the carpet a rest are you greedy and grasping and heartless and selfish asked the bird sharply no said robert with indignation well then said the phoenix and as to the rain well i am not fond of rain myself if the sun knew i was here he's very fond of shining on me because i look so bright and golden he always says i repay a little attention haven't you some form of word suitable for use in wet weather there's rain rain go away said anthea but it never does go perhaps you don't say the invocation properly said the bird rain rain go away come again another day little baby wants to play said anthea that's quite wrong and if you say it in that sort of dull way i can quite understand the rain not taking any notice you should open the window and shout as loud as you can rain rain go away come again another day now we want the sun and so pretty rain be kind and go you should always speak politely to people when you want them to do things and especially when it's going away that you want them to do and today you might add shine great sun the lovely fiend nix is here and wants to be shown on splendid sun by thee that's poetry said seril decidedly it's like it said the more cautious robert i was obliged to put in lovely said the phoenix modestly to make the line long enough there are plenty of nasty words just that length said jane but everyone else said hush and then they opened the window and shouted the seven lines as loud as they could and the phoenix said all the words with them except lovely and when they came to that it looked down and coughed bashfully the rain hesitated a moment and then went away that's true politeness said the phoenix and the next moment it was perched on the window ledge opening and shutting its radiant wings and flapping out its golden feathers in such a flood of glorious sunshine as you sometimes have its sunset in autumn time people said afterwards that there had not been such sunshine in december for years and years and years and now said the bird we will go out into the city and you shall take me to see one of my temples your temples i gather from the carpet that i have many temples in this land i don't see how you can find anything out from it said jane it never speaks all the same you can pick up things from a carpet said the bird i've seen you do it and i've picked up several pieces of information in this way that papyrus on which you showed me my picture i understand that it bears on it the name of the street of your city in which my finest temple stands with my image graved in stone and metal over against its portal you mean the fire insurance office said robert it's not really a temple and they don't excuse me said the phoenix coldly you are wholly misinformed it is a temple and they do don't let's waste the sunshine said anthia we might argue as we go along to save time so the phoenix consented to make itself a nest in the breast of roberts norfolk jacket and they all went out into the splendid sunshine the best way to the temple of the phoenix seemed to be to take the tram and on top of it the children talked while the phoenix now and then put out a wary beak cocked a cautious eye and contradicted what the children were saying it was a delicious ride and the children felt how lucky they were to have money to pay for it they went with the tram as far as it went and when it did not go any farther they stopped it to and got off the tram stops at the end of gray's inn road and it was syril who thought that one might well find a shortcut to the phoenix office through the little streets and courts that lie tightly packed between feather lane and ludgate circus of course he was quite mistaken and as robert told him at the time and afterwards robert did not forbear to remind his brother how he had said so the streets were small and stuffy and ugly and crowded with printers boys and binders girls coming out from work and these stared so hard at the pretty red coats and caps of the sisters that they wish they had gone some other way and the printers and binders made very personal remarks advising jane to get her haircut and inquiring where anthea had bought that hat jane and anthea scorned to reply and syril and robert found that they were hardly a match for the rough crowd they could think of nothing nasty enough to say they turned a corner sharply and then anthea pulled jane into an archway and then inside a door and syril and robert quickly followed and the jeering crowd passed by without seeing them anthea drew a long breath how awful she said i didn't know there were such people except in books it was a bit thick but that's partly you girls fault coming out in those flashy coats we thought we ought to when we were going out with the phoenix jane said and the bird said quite right too and unconsciously put out his head to give her a wink of encouragement at the same instant a dirty hand reached through the grim balustrade of the staircase beside them and clutched the phoenix and a hoarse voice said i say her bloat if this ain't our paul parrot what we lost thank you very much lady for bringing him home to roost the four turned swiftly two large and ragged boys were crouched amid the dark shadows of the stairs they were much larger than robert and syril and one of them had snatched the phoenix away and was holding it high above their heads give me that bird said syril sternly it's ours good afternoon and thank you the boy went on with maddening mockery sorry i can't give your tuppence for your trouble but i've had to spend my fortune advertising for my valuable bird in all the newspapers you can call for the reward next year look out ike said his friend a little anxiously it have a beak on it it's other parties as i'll have a beak on them presently said ike darkly if they come a try and to lay claims on my paul parrot you just shut up erb now then you four little gals get out outer this little girls cried robert all little girl you he sprang up three stairs and hid out there was a squawk the most birdlike noise anyone had ever heard from the phoenix and a fluttering and a laugh in the darkness and ike said there now you've been in gone and struck my paul parrot right in the feathers struck him something cruel you have robert stamped with fury syril felt himself growing pale with rage and with the effort of screwing up his brain to make it clever enough to think of some way of being even with those boys anthion jane were as angry as the boys but it made them want to cry yet it was anthia who said do please let us have the bird do please get along and leave us and our bird alone if you don't said anthia i shall fetch the police you better said he who was named erb say ike you twist the bloomin pigeon's neck he ain't worth tuppence oh no cried jane don't hurt it oh don't it's such a pat i won't hurt it said ike i'm ashamed of you erb for to think of such a thing arfa shiner miss and the bird is yours for life half a what's asked anthia arfa shiner quid thicken aphosov then i haven't got it and besides it's our bird said anthia oh don't talk to him said syril and then jane said suddenly phoenix dear phoenix we can't do anything you must manage it with pleasure said the phoenix and ike nearly dropped it in his amazement i say it do talk something like he said youths said the phoenix sons of misfortune hear my words my eyes said ike look out ike said erb you'll throttle the joker and i see it once he was worth his weight in flimsies harken oh iconoclasties the spiser of sacred images and thou urbanus dweller in the sordid city forbear this adventure lest a worse thing befall lover said ike ain't it been and taught at school and just restore me to my young acolytes and escape unscathed retain me and they must have got all this up case the poly got pinched said ike lord love me the artfulness of them youngins i say slosh him in the gaziche and get cleared off with the swags what i say urged herbert right oh said isek forbear repeated the phoenix sternly who pinched the click off the old bloke and alderman burry it added in a changed tone who sneaked the nose rag out of the young gales and in bell court who stole it said ike you ugly leaf go of me bash him off erb he'll have my blooming eyes outer me ed there were howls a scuffle a flutter ike and erb fled up the stairs and the phoenix swept out through the doorway the children followed and the phoenix settled on robert like a butterfly on a rose as anthea said afterwards and wriggled into the breast of his Norfolk jacket like an eel into mud as sero later said why ever didn't you burn him you could have couldn't you asked robert when the hurried flight through the narrow courts had ended in the safe wideness of faringdon street i could have of course said the bird but i didn't think it would be dignified to allow myself to get warm about a little thing like that the fates after all have not been illiberal to me i have a good many friends among the london sparrows and i have a beacon clause these happenings had somewhat shaken the adventurous temper of the children and the phoenix had to exert its golden self to harden them up presently the children came to a great house in lombard street and there on each side of the door was the image of the phoenix carved in stone and set forth on shining brass were the words phoenix fire office one moment said the bird fire for altars i suppose i don't know said robert he was beginning to feel shy and that always made him rather cross oh yes you do seral contradicted when people's houses are burnt down the phoenix gives them new houses father told me i asked him the house then like the phoenix rises from its ashes well have my priest dealt with the sons of men the sons of men pay you know said anthia but it's only a little every year that is to maintain my priest said the bird who in the hour of affliction heal sorrows and rebuild houses lead on inquire for the high priest i will not break upon them too suddenly in all my glory noble and honored deserving are they who make us not the evil deeds of the lame footed and unpleasing heffestus i don't know what you're talking about and i wish you wouldn't muddle us with new names fire just happens nobody does it not as a deed you know seral explained if they did the phoenix wouldn't help them because it is a crime to set fire to things arsenic or something they call it because it's as bad as poisoning people the phoenix wouldn't help them father told me it wouldn't my priest do well said the phoenix lead on i don't know what to say said seral and the others said the same ask for the high priest said the phoenix say that you have a secret to unfold the concerns my worship and he will lead you to the innermost sanctuary so the children went in all four of them although they didn't like it and stood in a large and beautiful hall adorned with dalton tiles like a large and beautiful bath with no water in it and stately pillars supporting the roof an unpleasing representation of the phoenix in brown pottery disfigured one wall there were counters and desks of mahogany and brass and clerks bent over the desks and walked behind the counters there was a great clock over an inner doorway inquire for the high priest whispered the phoenix an attentive clerk and decent black who controlled his mouth but not his eyebrows now came towards them he leaned forward on the counter and the children thought he was going to say what can i have the pleasure of showing you like in a draper's instead of which the young man said and what do you want we want to see the high priest get along with you said the young man an elder man also decent in black coat advanced perhaps it's mr blank not for worlds would i give the name he's a masonic high priest you know a porter was sent away to look for mr axster x i cannot give his name and the children were left there to look on and be looked on by all the gentlemen at the mahogany desks and thea and jane thought they looked kind the boys thought they stared and that it was like their cheek the porter returned with the news that mr dot dash dot i dare not reveal his name was out but that mr here a really delightful gentleman appeared he had a beard and a kind and merry eye and each one of the four knew it once that this was a man who had kitties of his own and could understand what you were talking about yet it was a difficult thing to explain what is it he asked mr he named the name which i will never reveal is out can i do anything inner sanctuary murmured the phoenix i beg your pardon said the nice gentleman who thought it was robert who had spoken we have something to tell you said siro but he glanced at the porter who was lingering much nearer than he need have done this is a very public place the nice gentleman laughed come upstairs then he said and led the way up a wide and beautiful staircase anthea says the stairs were of white marble but i am not sure on the corner post of the stairs at the top was a beautiful image of the phoenix in dark metal and on the wall at each side was a flat sort of image of it the nice gentleman led them into a room where the chairs and even the tables were covered with reddish leather he looked at the children inquiringly don't be frightened he said tell me exactly what you want may i shut the door asked siro the gentleman looked surprised but he shut the door now said siro firmly i know you'll be awfully surprised and you'll think it's not true and we are lunatics but we aren't and it is robert's got something inside his Norfolk that's robert my young brother now don't be upset and have a fit or anything sir of course i know when you called your shop the phoenix you never thought there was one but there is and robert's got it buttoned up against his chest if it's an old curio in the form of a phoenix i dare say the board said the nice gentleman as robert began to fumble with his buttons it's old enough said anthea going by what it says but my goodness gracious said the gentleman as the phoenix with one last wriggle that melted into a flutter got out of its nest in the breast of robert and stood up on the leather covered table what an extraordinarily fine bird he went on i don't think i ever saw one just like it i should think not said the phoenix with pardonable pride and the gentleman jumped oh it's been taught to speak some sort of parrot perhaps i am said the bird simply the head of your house and i have come to my temple to receive your homage i am no parrot it's be curved scornfully i am the one and only phoenix and i demand the homage of my high priest in the absence of our manager the gentleman began exactly as though he were addressing a valued customer in the absence of our manager i might perhaps be able what am i saying he turned pale and passed his hand across his brow my dears he said the weather is unusually warm for the time of year and i don't feel quite myself do you know for a moment i really thought that that remarkable bird of yours had spoken and said it was the phoenix and that what's more that i believed it so it did sir said saral and so did you it really allow me a bell was rung the porter appeared mackenzie said the gentleman you see that golden bird yes sir the other brief desire of relief it is real then yes sir of course sir you take it in your hand sir said the porter sympathetically and reached out his hand to the phoenix who shrank back on toes curved with agitated indignation for bear it cried how dare you seek to lay hands on me the porter saluted big pardon sir he said i thought you was a bird i am a bird the bird the phoenix of course you are sir said the porter i see that the first minute directly i got my breath sir that will do said the gentleman ask mr wilson and mr starey to come up here for a moment please mr starey and mr wilson were in their turnover come by amazement quickly followed by conviction to the surprise of the children everyone in the office took the phoenix at its word and after the first shock of surprise seemed to be perfectly natural to everyone that the phoenix should be alive and that passing through london it should call it its temple we ought to have some sort of ceremony said the nicest gentleman anxiously there isn't time to summon the directors and shareholders we might do that tomorrow perhaps yes the boardroom would be best i shouldn't like it to feel that we hadn't done everything in our power to show our appreciation of its condescension in looking in on us in this friendly way the children could hardly believe their ears for they had never thought that anyone but themselves would believe in the phoenix yet everyone did all the men in the office were brought in by twos and threes and the moment the phoenix opened its beak it convinced the cleverest of them as well as those who were not so clever sarah wondered how the story would look in the papers next day he seemed to see the posters in the streets phoenix fire office the phoenix at its temple meeting to welcome it delight of the manager and everybody excuse our leaving you a moment said the nice gentleman and he went away with the others and through the half-closed door the children could hear the sound of many boots on the stairs the hum of excited voices explaining suggesting arguing the thumpy drag of heavy furniture being moved about the phoenix strutted up and down the leather covered table looking over its shoulder at its pretty back you see what a convincing manner i have it said proudly and now a new gentleman came in and said bowing low everything is prepared we have done our best at so short a notice the meeting the ceremony will be in the boardroom will the honorable phoenix walk it is only a few steps or would it like to be would it like some sort of conveyance my robert will bear me to the boardroom if that be the unlovely name of my temple's innermost court replied the bird so they all followed the gentleman there was a big table in the boardroom but it had been pushed right up under the long windows at one side and the chairs were arranged in rows across the room like those you have at school when there's a magic lantern on our eastern empire or on the way we do in the navy the doors were of carved wood very beautiful with a carved phoenix above and thea noticed the chairs in the front rows were of the kind that her mother so loved to ask the price of in old furniture shops and could never buy because the price was always nearly 20 pounds each on the mantelpiece were some heavy bronze candlesticks and a clock and on the top of the clock was another image of the phoenix remove that effigy said the phoenix to the gentleman who were there and it was hastily taken down then the phoenix fluttered to the middle of the mantelpiece and stood there looking more golden than ever then everyone in the house and the office came in from the cashier to the women who cooked the clerk's dinners in the beautiful kitchen at the top of the stairs and everyone bowed to the phoenix and then sat down in a chair gentlemen said the nicest gentlemen we have met here today the phoenix was turning its golden beak from side to side i don't notice any incense it said with an injured sniff a hurried consultation ended in plates being fetched from the kitchen brown sugar sealing wax and tobacco were placed on these and something from a square bottle was poured over it all then a match was applied it was the only incense that was handy in the phoenix office and it certainly burned very briskly and smoked a great deal we have met here today said the gentleman again on an occasion unparalleled in the annals of this office our respected phoenix head of the house said the phoenix in a hollow voice i was coming to that our respected phoenix the head of this ancient house has at length done us the honor to come among us i think i may say gentlemen that we are not insensible to this honor and that we welcome with no uncertain voice one whom we have so long desired to see in our midst several of the younger clerks thought of saying here here but they feared it might seem disrespectful to the bird i will not take up your time the speaker went on by recapitulating the advantages to be derived from a proper use of our system of fire insurance i know and you know gentlemen that our aim has ever been to be worthy of that eminent bird whose name we bear and who now adorns our mantelpiece with his presence three cheers gentlemen for the winged head of the house the cheers arose deafening when they died away the phoenix was asked to say a few words it expressed in graceful phrases the pleasure it felt in finding itself at last in its own temple and it went on you must not think me wanting an appreciation of your very hearty and cordial reception when i ask that an ode may be recited or a choric song sung it is what i have always been accustomed to the four children dumb witnesses of this wonderful scene glanced a little nervously across the foam of white faces above the sea of black coats it seemed to them that the phoenix was really asking a little too much time presses said the phoenix and the original ode of invocation is long as well as being Greek and besides it's no use invoking me when here i am but is there not a song in your own tongue for a great day such as this absently the manager began to sing and one by one the rest joined absolute security no liability all kinds of property insured against fire terms most favorable expenses reasonable moderate rates for annual insurance that one is not my favorite interrupted the phoenix and i think you've forgotten part of it the manager hastily began another oh golden phoenix ferris bird the whole great world has often heard of all the splendid things we do great phoenix just to honor you that's better said the bird and everyone sang class one for private dwelling house for household goods and shops allows provided these are built of brick or stone and tiled and slated thick try another verse said the phoenix further on and again arose the voices of all the clerks and employees and managers and secretaries and cooks in scotland our insurance yields the price of burnt up stacks in fields skip that verse said the phoenix that's dwellings and their whole contents we deal with also with their rents oh glorious phoenix look and see that these are dealt with in class three the glories of your temple throng too thick to go in any song and we attend oh good and wise two days of grace and merchandise when people's homes are burnt away they never have a cent to pay if they have done as all should do oh phoenix and have honored you so let us raise our voice and sing the praises of the phoenix king in classes one and two and three oh trust to him for kindness he i'm sure you're very kind said the phoenix and now we must be going and thank you very much for a very pleasant time may you all prosper as you deserve to do for i'm sure a nicer pleasenter-spoken lot of temple attendance i have never met and never wished to meet i wish you all good day it fluttered to the wrist of robert and drew the four children from the room the whole of the office staff followed down the wide stairs and filed on to their custom places and the two most important officials stood on the steps bowing till robert had buttoned the golden bird in his Norfolk bosom and it and he and the three other children were lost in the crowd the two most important gentlemen looked at each other earnestly and strangely for a moment and then retreated to those sacred inner rooms where they toil without ceasing for the good of the house and the moment they were all in their places managers secretaries clerks and porters they all started and each looked cautiously round to see if anyone was looking at him for each had thought that he'd fallen asleep for a few minutes and had dreamed a very odd dream about the phoenix in the boardroom and of course no one mentioned it to anyone else because going to sleep at your office is a thing you simply must not do the extraordinary confusion of the boardroom with the remains of the incense in the plates would have shown them at once that the visit of the phoenix had been no dream but a radiant reality but no one went into the boardroom again that day and next day before the office was opened it was all cleaned and put nice and tidy by a lady whose business asking questions was not part of that is why Cyril read the papers in vain on the next day and the day after that because no sensible person thinks his dreams worth putting in the paper and no one will ever own he has been asleep in the daytime the phoenix was very pleased but it decided to write an ode for itself it thought the ones that had heard at its temple had been too hastily composed its own ode began for beauty and for modest worth the phoenix has not its equal on earth and when the children went to bed that night it was still trying to cut down the last line to the proper length without taking out any of what it wanted to say that is what makes poetry so difficult end of chapter five recording by Kay Hindle Ithaca, New York May 2008