 Hello everyone, welcome to the NARC Survivor YouTube channel. In this video I'm going to be talking about how narcissists use black magic to control you, but before I begin please give this video a thumbs up down below. It will help the YouTube algorithm to spread this awareness. The narcissist influences you by using supernatural forces which have power over natural forces. They reduce illusions by the use of deceptive devices with an intention to manipulate you by putting you in a state of fear. They would use certain symbols to destroy your mind and it won't require much effort from them because once they've put you in a state of fear and anticipation the rest of it is you destroying yourself. Which is why it is important to be aware of it without fearing it. The narcissist has studied you, they've learned you and they've identified certain things that you are reactive to so that they're able to control you. Where to an outside observer it may seem as though you're in a trance or under a spell and you may act out of character to where you're not following your usual pattern of behavior and motives because the narcissist understands the impact of your own psychology on you and they know that once they represent certain ideas rather than representing the real world it will affect your state of mind and it may lead to you destroying yourself which is a horrific thing for someone to do it again. But the reason why they do it may be quite surprising. They do it to avoid rejection or in response to rejection to your decision to not accept them because their biggest fear is to be rejected which is why their entire image revolves around being this object of desire as someone who is impressive and imposing. At times they may seem arrogant and cold hearted but deep down they actually want nothing more than to feel loved and accepted. They crave a sense of belonging. We all do, it's an emotional need but for narcissists they want that more than anything else because they felt rejected by their parents in childhood. They felt unloved, unseen and unheared as though no one valued or cared about them which is a very traumatic experience for anyone but for a child it's one of the worst things that can happen because children need to be loved unconditionally. They need to experience a secure attachment to their parents. It's essential to their growth and development but the narcissists emotional needs were never met and a child's desire to be loved unconditionally by their parents is more important than anything else to the point where the child will abandon themselves if it means that they will be loved and this is what the narcissist did as a child. They abandoned their true selves and they created a false character who is everything they believe they're not. Everything they felt that they needed to be loved and accepted by their parents. The problem is that this process is irreversible. There's no going back when a child abandons their identity it can't come back so the only thing that you have left is their false self which requires excessive attention admiration and praise. It needs narcissistic supply in order for them to survive emotionally because they have nothing inside of them it's just a void because their parents were meant to provide them with a sense of self-worth but they didn't so their self-worth was questioned and threatened and then it was lost. If you're finding this video helpful you can give it a thumbs up down below which will help to support our community. The child accepted that who they were was not valuable so they discarded their true selves in place of their false self who they deemed to be omnipotent and now the false self is all that they have. There is nothing else. Nothing else can be created and there is no possible way to reverse this process but this is why they can never be alone and it's why they're so sensitive to rejection. No one wants to be rejected but narcissists have very extreme reactions to rejection to where it will cause a narcissistic injury and they may lash out at you, triangle at you with another person and even start a smear campaign against you because the existence of their false self is dependent on external validation without that it ceases to exist so when you reject a narcissist it will feel like life or death to them as though they're in a fight for their lives and that is why they will often behave rationally if they feel that you are rejecting them and they will resort to black magic as a means to control you or to prevent you from rejecting them and it's because they hate rejection so much that they would rather settle for a simulation of love and acceptance but when I say black magic I'm not referring to witchcraft or spells the narcissist black magic is their manipulation lies future faking gaslighting devaluation and triangulation because that is what puts you in a trance and keeps you under their spell it makes you believe that you want them which then makes it more believable for them because you're sharing this fantasy that they've created inside their heads of them being everything that they need to be in order to elicit attention and duration and praise from you they may often go hot and cold and use the push-pull strategy and they may use intermittent reinforcement which is where they give you rewards for certain behaviors or responses but without any predictable pattern and it's to get you hooked on them and to make you behave in a way that you wouldn't normally behave until you feel like you're eager to get something from them whether it's compliments validation or attention but when you're dealing with a narcissist they will often want to make you desperate for sex even though when you think about it rationally it doesn't make any sense you may not even understand why you're designing them it may be completely out of character for you but it's because you're under a spell they've induced an altered state in you which wasn't there before and it's so that they can get their narcissistic supply to prop up their false character but this may also be your post-traumatic stress response you may be falling which is where you put placate and appease the narcissist in an attempt to reduce their volatility and abusiveness so you're trying to please them and cater to their needs rather than your own to avoid conflict and establish a sense of safety by displaying excessive flattery or affection by praising them too much and giving them a lot of attention to where you're acting submissive and being overattentive because although your mind may not be consciously aware of it your body just wants it to stop so you may often find yourself given into their demands and letting them think that they've got you or you may experience other forms of stress response such as flight fight or freeze and it's because you're dealing with mental and emotional strain and tension from adverse and demanding circumstances from things that are harmful and unfavorable the problem is that even the former response will not improve your situation with a narcissist in fact it will only make the situation worse as they get bored because their power and false sense of self comes from them being oppositional it makes them feel like they're in control as they use it to compensate for their insecurities and deficiencies which is why even if you're on your hands and knees and you're begging and pleading for their mercy and forgiveness that just tells them that they've got you wrapped around their thumb and that you're not going anywhere and then they will take the opportunity to reject you so that they can project their feelings of non-acceptance onto you because they may not even realize that it's just a post-traumatic stress response they may believe that it's genuine so they will use it to establish a position of superiority and control over you when in fact despite all of their tools and tricks they're actually just being delusional they can't accept that you don't want them so they will target your self-esteem and break you down mentally and emotionally to create this altered perception of their own self-worth through manipulation lies future faking devaluation gaslighting and triangulation to further exploit your form response to make themselves and yourself believe that you actually want them when in reality the opposite is true they want you which is why they're so sensitive to the threat of rejection and they're acting irrationally but you never wanted them they just figured out a way to trick you into thinking that you want them they manipulated and abused you to the point where you experienced the form response which affected your sense of self because they targeted yourself esteem so they held you ransom to their acceptance of you until you complied with their demands when you were just placating and appeasing a false character that didn't have your best interest in mind because it's not even real it's a shared fantasy which means that you can only resolve it by going into your own mind because there was never anything for you to connect to which is why when you finally emerge from the fog you will realize that you never wanted them and in fact there was never anything for you to want because it was a fabrication it was just these false ideas and beliefs that they implanted in your mind it had no basis in reality but as long as you were willing to go along with it they didn't really care because they were still getting their narcissistic supply but it was all black magic you were in a hypnotic trance you were under a spell it wasn't even you it was who they needed you to be but then it wasn't even them it was just a projection of who they thought you wanted them to be your head was in the clouds you were absent minded so you thought you could fix them you felt like you could accomplish anything with them when this is all in your mind because they can't be saved who they really were died a long time ago they're damaged beyond repair so whatever you thought you wanted or whatever you thought you saw in them doesn't even exist it's not even there it was projected into your mind they induced artificial feelings and beliefs in order to reduce their desired effects where you were like a puppet on a string you were thirsty for them you were at their back and call which was a very gratifying experience for them because their emotional needs and childhood were never met and they really get a kicker of turning a person into the exact opposite of who they really are into turning a positive optimistic and hopeful person into an emotional wreck or by giving you hope even when there's little or no chances of success because that's what makes it so gratifying for them when whatever course of action you take whatever you embark on if they can find the power to make you go in the opposite direction so that you oppose and reject yourself you go back on whatever you've said you stand for because that to them is true power that means they're in control when they've never felt powerful or in control in their entire lives so they're power hungry they're on a power trip and that is why they use black magic to break you down to the point where they feel like they own you because at least then they have something real or they have something that was real before they got their hands on it and even then they will still reject you because they're broken people they're very insecure and they already felt rejected by you which caused a narcissistic injury so now they just want to soothe their bruised ego by devaluing and rejecting you and turning you against yourself because they see it as though you're the one thing that's standing in their way of gaining control and this is just what they do to their targets they have no capacity for self-awareness or identity because they're just full of everyone else they steal our qualities and traits and they leave us as a shell of who we used to be they're occupying mental real estate in your mind which you would otherwise use to hold on to manage and navigate things in your life or to carry out day-to-day responsibilities in the roles that many of us have such as being a leader a partner parent sibling child colleague or friends but now you can't even do that because they're in there they're in your head now to avoid the risk of them being rejected and forgotten which is very important to them because they've already rejected themselves so they're not going to feel any remorse for rejecting you and they actually hope that they can get you to the point where you reject yourself because at least then it's a level playing field but this is why they're so afraid of rejection because they have no true self so they lack self-awareness because there's no self for them to be aware of which is why everything they engage in is externally focused they're always looking for feedback, trains, answers and solutions because they can't find anything within themselves which is why they will mirror you and desperately attempt to reflect your own qualities and virtues back to you to make you want them but even then it's not even them they abandon themselves a long time ago so in that moment neither they or you are real it's a shared fantasy it's shared psychosis which is why anyone who is around a narcissist long enough will begin to feel like they're losing their mind because that's exactly what is happening you have to abandon yourself to even be around them there's no space for anyone else there's only a room for the false character which is why if you try to hold on to any part of your own identity they're going to reject you and then they're going to eject you from a fantasy of their own making where you unknowingly became a participant and then you stayed out of pity guilt or a foreign response and yet they twisted it in their minds as though you can't do without them when they manipulated and abused you they targeted your self-esteem and then they left you to chase after your own sense of self which they held hostage from you as a means to control you thank you all for watching if you found this video helpful please give it a thumbs up share your thoughts in the comment section hit that subscribe button to receive the notifications and if you would like to support the channel you can donate at paypal.me you can book a one-on-one with me on my website it's narksurviva.co.uk thank you for watching and i'll talk to you soon