 Fiery horse with the speed of light, a cloud of dust and a hearty high old silver, the lone ranger. To this day, the masked writer of justice is famous throughout the western United States as the four prime and criminals. He was a fearless ally of the law in those early frontier days when law enforcement operated in the face of almost impossible odds. With his great horse, Silver, and his faithful Indian companion, Tonto, he risked his life again and again to bring peace to a land that knew only the rule of the six gun. And now we return once more to those days of danger and adventure. The lone ranger rides again. Ranger rode by on Silver. He said that he was riding to Dawson. Doc Stubbs traveled throughout the west selling countless cases of a preparation he called snake oil. It was, according to his claim, a sure cure for almost any illness known to man. He arrived at last in the town of Dawson. And when he set up his medicine show, settlers came from miles around to enjoy the entertainment and stayed by his tonic. The lone ranger stood at the edge of the crowd beside his faithful Indian companion, Tonto. He watched the show carefully, observing Doc Stubbs' methods. I'll stand close behind you, Tonto, and if anyone comes this way, I'll be able to conceal the mask. I'll ask him questions. I should have disguised my face so I could take the mask off. Not time for that. I know it. Stubbs will be coming from inside his wagon in just a minute. Isn't that right? As soon as the entertainers finish. Maybe we get him this time. We're going to try. His timing will stop. He's robbed people from here to the Mississippi. I don't have no intent to occupy all of your valuable time with what I got to say. A few well-chosen words won't take long. Then we're going on with the show again. What I speak for at this time is in the nature of a warning. My vast experience in addressing crowds of people between both coasts of our great country shows me that wherever there's a crowd, there's a risk. Among you here tonight, there may be crooks at work. I mean it, folks. There are strangers here, unknown to any of you. Folks who make your living picking the pockets of others who are listening to what I'm saying. Now be careful, folks, and make sure that your pockets ain't picked in the course of my entertainment. My health stock and consultation service that'll follow immediately. Watch your property, folks. And meanwhile, have a good time listening to Doc Stubbs' incomparable entertainers. Let her go, boys! You see the people, Tyler? Mm-hmm. Thank you, Tyler. Elon Pocket. To make sure his money was still there. And that's just what Stubbs wanted them to do. That's right. They're the ones who might be robbed. Ooh, Helton Stubbs. I think he has men scattered through the crowd. As near as I can figure it out, he lets these men see whose pockets are worth picking, and has them picked. Well, Snead, was you where you could watch folks while I made that speech? Yeah. I just got done observing them. I've seen a half a dozen that looked likely, but one that was more likely than the other. Yeah? I asked who he was. It's Jim Campbell, boss at a bar, K Ranch, a few miles north of here. That sounds good. I've seen him fumble with a money belt that looked mighty heavy. And this is the time when the cattlemen get paid. Maybe he's got all his cattle money with him. Stubbs, why don't you let me just lift the belt from him? I'll save a lot of bother. No, sir. That's too risky Snead. Picking pockets ain't safe. Oh, this ain't picking pockets. It's even harder to pick a man's money belt. Not for me. We stick to doing things my way. Picking pockets was all right in the east, but out here they'd lynch us for it. Now set aside them special medicine bottles. Oh. And make sure you hand some to Jim Kendall. You can point him out to me as I start selling. Now we've got to get ready. The music's most done. That ain't all, gents. We've got more. We've got more music, more dancing, and more things to show you. But first, I want to take this opportunity to bring relief to them that suffers, hair to them that's bald, comfort and health to all the alien. Folks, right here in this small bottle is the world's greatest discovery. The secret of my famous snake oil tonic was lost since the earliest Egyptian days. On one of my world tours, I found the secret formula written early Egyptian on the inside of the tomb of Nebuchadnezzar. Yes, sorry, folks. The thing that my snake oil tonic won't cure ain't been discovered. Akes and pains, colds, lameness, rheumatism, dandruff, summer cake, headache, toothache, neuralgia, asthma, gout, and baldness. Snake oil, pepsi up, and it's the thing for whatever algea. How'd Methuselah live to be a thousand years of age? Snake oil! What made Solomon so wise? Snake oil! But men of your intelligence don't need convincing when they see a gnarless man. All I can say is try it, and if it don't do what it's claimed, your cash will be refunded cheerfully. Jim, Kendall, there's times when I wonder if you're in your right mind. Now what's the matter, Marthy? I wouldn't mind it had you fetched home one bottle of that stuff for a dollar, but the idea of toting home a whole case of it. Ten dollars a dozen, Marthy. I saved me two dollars. From what the doc said after looking me over, it's just what I've been needing from a rheumatix. Ten dollars. I had to stock up on it, because doc mightn't be back this way at all. He aims to sail for the Orient when he gets to the Gold Coast. Now reckon he better have to swim than everyone in this country. Besides, ain't no risk. He said if it was gnarly claimed, he'd give back the cash. Is that so? Well, let me ask you, Jim, if you can't find him to buy more, how untunker do you're gonna find him to give back the cash? Great ginger, you never thought of that. Ten dollars. Just because you got your cattle money, you go and spend it like a groad on trees. Well, anyhow, if it cures me a rheumatix, it'll be worth it. I'm gonna try some. Have a try of it? No, I don't want none of that stuff. Say, by ginger, that stuff tastes all right. A dollar a bottle, it should. Better have a try at it. I ain't got no rheumatics. Well, you got aching feet. Doc said to cure most anything. All's I need to cure my aching feet. The chances to sit down once or twice between sunup and bedtime. This is good. We reckon I'll have another go at it. Now, don't you take too much of that stuff. The first swig was from a rheumatix. This one is from Aylen Hart. Your heart? Sure. Doc told me my heart weren't so good. I'll maybe have to take the whole bottle before I bid. I've got so many things I'm Aylen with. You look like you enjoyed that stuff. Tastes first rate. Better try some. Well, maybe I'd better. There you are. I'm gonna make him a right arm. Maybe it'll help there. Sure it will. Maybe I should have got a couple dozen bottles while I was at it. I do declare this don't taste like medicine at all. In a prime? First rate. I've got no chance to help mom considerable, but hold on. You got your cash, ain't ya? Sure, here it is. Right here in the money belt. All right then. I hear that there were sometimes pickpockets working in the crowd. They wouldn't get me. No, sirree. That shows how square the dock is. He warned us to see that our cash was safe. Let me have a mite and more of that stuff. Don't believe it's helping my ache. Yeah, huh? I'm down right sleepy. It should be gallivanting to that medicine show town. Here, pour your own snake oil. I'm going to bed. Later that same night while Jim Kendall and his wife slept soundly, dock stubs and Snead approached their home. A masked man in town secretly following the two men saw dock stubs wait outside while his companion entered. Snead was gone for only a short time and when he returned, dock stubs spoke to him. You got it, Snead? Sure, I got it. There's the belt and Kendall never moved a muscle. I tell ya, Snead, that snake oil that we give to one of men sure makes him sleep, don't it? Sure does. He wore the belt to bed with him and I had to take it off, but still he didn't start on it. Good. I told him to be sure and take at least a half a bottle before bedtime. There was a whole bottle drained. I seen it. They sure oversleep in the morning. Stubs, that stuff ain't likely to pies in a misset. Oh, nothing like that. That'd be going too far. Now we got a couple of more places to call on. Let me see. I reckon the next one is Mr. Ralph Jennings. He's got more cash than he knows what to do with. Come on, Snead, on to Mr. Jennings. Wait a minute. Go get him crook. Not yet. Him take money. I know. Steal him from Kendall. Let him go, Kimosabe. We're going to stay right here until morning and catch Jim Kendall just as soon as he awakens. The next morning, the entire town was excited by news of the thefts. When Sheriff Lambert arrived his office, he met Hank Jennings and half of us and other men, impatiently waiting for him. Quiet! I can't hear all of you speaking to one. Let me get into my office and speak one to a time. My cash was stolen. Look here, Sheriff Lamson. We got a thief in town. Boys, have only you been robbed? Took me for $300. Well, hold on. We've got to get some clues to work with. I already got ideas. Who? An engine. How's that? Now, look, I reckon any man here will tell you that there ain't a lighter sleeper alive than what I am. I'll vouch for that. There ain't but two things in coming to my room at night and not wake me up. One is a kitten, the other is an engine. And I seen a strange engine around town all day yesterday. Sheriff Lamson. It's a dog. I must see you, Sheriff. Dog stubs. Oh, say that you've been robbed. I figured this was an honest community, Sheriff. But it ain't. I was robbed of a fortune during the night. Well, I bet they're granted. How many mores are going to be? Well, maybe I'm wrong in judging a local man the thief. It might be one of my own boys. An entertainer, a banjo player, skipped out during the night. Now, it might have been him. Doc, I would just tell the Sheriff here that I seen a strange engine around the town yesterday. Ah, that must be it. That must be it then. I done wrong suspecting my banjo player. He must have just got tired of working and took off. An Indian, you say? That's it. We must locate him. Hi, there's an engine outside. That's him. Catch him. Grab him, boys. Catch him in here. Come on, get him. Good. What matter? Come on, we want you register in. Robbers, will you? We'll show you. He's the one. He must be the one. If he is, he'll hang for it. The curtain falls on the first act of our thrilling Lone Ranger drama. Before the next exciting scenes, please permit us to pause for just a few moments. How to continue our story. When Doc Stubbs entered Dawson with his medicine show, he found out which men had money, sold them, drugged bottles of his tonic, then with his partner robbed his victims while they slept. The Lone Ranger and Tonto had followed Doc Stubbs, hoping to get evidence against him. But in the meantime, Tonto was accused of the thefts and jailed. Our next scene opened in the Sheriff's office. Tonto is facing his accusers. Of course you deny doing it. He done it all right, though, Sheriff. Me not thief. There ain't no white man could get to my bedroom and rob me and not wake me up. You might as well confess, Indian. Me not talk. Look here, Sheriff Lamson. The door to my place squeaks. I just thought of that. That would wake me up if anyone come here. Them boys got back with the engine's horses yet? No. It seems like he'd have the loot on his horse. He's got it hid somewhere. Stubbs, suppose you'll let me question him and you keep your mouth shut. I'm the Sheriff here. Oh, the thanks I get for trying to be helpful. Shut up! You can make things a darn sight easier for yourself if you tell where the cash is hid and return it. Me not talk. He wouldn't confess to Steenlet, not even to save his life. He ought to hang. Will you let me do the talking? My engine. Suppose I told you he'd hang if he didn't bring back the cash and go free if he did. No. You stand there shaking your head, huh? Well, I... Sheriff, I gotta speak with you. Good morning, Mrs. Kendra. Don't tell me Jim's been robbed, too. Oh, Sheriff, it wasn't that. You better come and see the remains. The remains? Oh, you're dreadful. I'm afraid he's been poisoned. He's some critter by the name of Doc Stubbs. Stubbs? What's that? I don't know what the critter looks like, but he's so poor Jim, it doesn't bother to that medicine. Snake oil? Yeah, and Jim took an awful lot of it. More was good for anyone. I bet that's what brought on the end. There's the Doc there! You! You, Doc Stubbs! You kill us! You fake you! You'll swing for this! No, no, wait. My good lady. I ain't your good lady. I'm Jim Kendall's widow. Oh. What about that, Stubbs? Is there anything in that snake oil that's piecing? No, no. I, I told Kendall he, he was in bad shape. His, his heart. You are never sick in his life, not the least seen you. Sheriff, if that's what that snake oil does, oh, my sakes, I'll be dying from it. Will you come with me, Sheriff? Come and see if you don't think Jim's been poisoned. You, Jim, shall have to wait till I get back. But my cash is stolen. What about my money? All of you wait here and watch the prisoners. Stubbs, you're under arrest along with the red skin. Me? You can't arrest me. You poisoned my husband. There's a mistake. There's a mistake somewhere. We're holding you till we investigate. Oh, this is no way to treat a visitor in your town. There ain't nothing you can charge me with. Well, as much as he is to charge the engine with, I'm in favor of keeping suspects where I can lay my hands on them when I want them. Jail them, boys. Come on, Doc. You heard what the Sheriff said. You can't put me in jail. This ain't legal. You can't do this to me. Who says we can't? Come on, Miss Kendall. Go have a look at your husband. We better get the coroner in our way. Well, listen, Sheriff. Sheriff Lamson. Ain't no use you shouting, Stubbs. He's gone. Oh, this ain't right. I got things to tend to at my camp. My things are unprotected there. What's left after the thieving of last night? Now you just sit there and relax. We all been robbed by that Kansan red skin. Where's my partner? Where's Mr. I mean, Dr. Stubbs. Sleed, here I am. Come over here. Oh, gosh, Doc. You're in the caliber. Come here. I maybe better be getting out. Come here, I tell you. Boys, the least you can do for your friend Doc Stubbs is to let me speak to my assistant manager in private. Go on and speak. We're staying here to guard you and the red skin. What I've got to say is of a personal nature. It's pertaining to my business. Would you mind stepping back from the door a little? Leave him talk, boys. After all, the Doc gave us a whale of a good show last night. Doc, is there any danger? This is neat. The main trouble would be improving the red skin in here with me stowa things last night. Yeah? What are you inside that cell for? Kendall's heart got him. His wife has an idea. It's my snake oil that flies in there. Oh, gosh. I can get out of that all right by proving this red skin a thief. I savvy. Folks all suspect him. Now, if only some of the stolen things could be found in his belongings, that'd clinch it. Maybe you could find some evidence while the sheriff's at Kendall's place. Reckon, maybe I could. I'll go try. The sheriff had left with Mrs. Kendall, but returned in an hour. He was stirring as men gathered around him with countless questions. What about Kendall? What killed him? How did it happen? Now, get to fighting, Arkesh. When will we get our money back? Oh, quiet down, you bunch of galutes. Quiet down there. Quiet. Oh, handle things as I get to them. Sheriff. Sheriff Langston. You can't pay no gullible. You can't pay no gullible. Sheriff Langston, you can't pay no guilt on me. Who says I can't? What right you got to sell such stuff as that snake oil of yours? Sheriff. Hey, Sheriff. Look what I found. He's got my buckskin money bag. There's my purse. Sleep. Why'd you find that evidence? Quiet, now. Quiet, quiet here. What's this stuff you got here? Evidence. Ain't it, Sheriff? I found it all together by that engine's camp. Hmm. You did, huh? What about it, red skin? That's not true. You can't lie out of it now, red skin. Keep your trap shut, stubs. I'm Sheriff here, and I'll handle things. And, Snead, you sure that's all stolen goods? Sure it is. How'd you know? Huh? I says, how'd you know it was the engine's own property? Well, I just... I heard Jennings and a couple of the others claim their money bags. But you didn't know they belonged to them before you come here, did you? Sure it is. He's seen them take cash from them money bags last night at my meeting. Didn't he see? Yeah, sure. Sure thing. Well, where's the cash? I don't care about the bag. I want what was in it. I reckon you'll have to make the engine tell you about that. Well, make him talk, Sheriff. Just let him out of that cell long enough for me to get my hands on him. Let me at him. We'll choke the truth out of him. He's guilty. You can see by the grin on his face. I ain't so sure about that. First of all, though, he got something else to tend to. Stubbs, I told you. I'd seen the remains of Jim Kendall. Yeah, but... Do you claim this snake or yours won't hurt a man? Of course it won't. Not even if a man took a whole bottle of it? I don't care how much he took. Well, you'll have to prove that. Where's the bottle of it? Drink it. What? Take it in here. Make the quitter drink it. Let me make him drink. Me? Take your own medicine for a change. Let's see how it affects you. But I ain't dealing. You will be if you don't drink it. You take him. Now listen here, gents. Make him stop. You take him. Look at the doc taking his own medicine. That's the ticket, Stubbs. Drink it down. Show him that you ain't a fear of it. Maybe we better give his partner a bottle of it, too. I won't take that stuff. Look at him travel. But this ain't getting back our money. Well, get around to that. When I get done finding out if Doc Stubbs has been selling poison. Make him drink it, engine. Ain't all gone now. Stubbs drank it all right. There's the empty bottle. This ain't right. It ain't legal. It ain't just. I'll have the law on you. I'm the law here, Stubbs. How do you feel? Oh, I'm ill. I'm a sick man. I'm dying. You shouldn't. You shouldn't have done it. Have you taken his medicine? You bet he has. Who's the best man? Who's that? Help me, help me. No, no, no, no, no. I'm falling asleep. Take it easy, boys. This masked man's a friend of ours. How is he, tell her? Him be sleep plenty quick. Oh, I can't keep awake. You, you can't do this to me. All right, men. If you want your stolen money back, come with me. I'll show you the way. Our money back? Do what he says, boys. Need to take orders from him just as if to come from me. Come on, boys. The sheriff and the group of angry ranchers left the office to follow the masked man. They rode towards Doc Stubbs' medicine show, but before they'd covered more than half the distance, they saw a rider approaching them. Hey, that looks like Jim Kindle. It is Jim Kindle, but you said he was dead. That senior's remains? Well, I didn't tell you that the room... It's danger. Where's Snead? Packin' things at Doc Stubbs' wagon. Packin' things? Get him to set the full stakes. You better hurry if you want to catch him. But Kindle, how's it that you're alive? Come on and ride. I'll tell you why we're going after Snead. Get up, man. Come on. Yep. Then Kindle's wife came for me when I got this place. The masked man told me what was what. We made Snead think the medicine was really poison. He took a whole bottle of it. Bigger than he'd take the loot in the high tail. And that's just what the coyote's doing. There he goes now, wagon and all. Come on, Silver. Get some before he gets very far. There comes a sheriff and the men you help rob Snead. He'll run for a rest. Kill me like what you done with the doc. You! But the medicine needs surprise to see me livin'. Kindle! That medicine ain't poison, but it's sure a sleek producer. Hand over the stolen cash, Snead. I ain't got it! Hand it over. It's somewhere in that wagon and we're here to get it. If you don't want to go back and get lynched with the doc, let's have the stolen cash. Lynch! No, no, don't take me back. Listen, listen to me, Sheriff. The cash is all inside the wagon. It's all there. And all the dockstone from every other town is there too. Take it and let me go. It's in the trunk. That's all we wanted to know, Snead. We won't take you back to get lynched. Yeah. Here, let me go. Got a chance on it. We won't take you back to hang. But we'll sure take you back to keep Stubbs Company in jail after we let Tato go free. Sorry you have just heard is a copyrighted feature of the Lone Ranger Incorporated. Thank you.