 Joining us from NIAC New York, he's not from NIAC, NIAC New York, he's in NIAC New York, which is one of the most beautiful spots in the world. He is headlining Levity Live in NIAC New York this Friday and tomorrow Saturday. Alonzo Bowden, hello there Alonzo. What's up David? And you know, you're right about NIAC, it's funny, I grew up in Queens, I'd never been up here and it was like, oh, so this is what happens, you cross the George Washington Bridge and there's a sign that says Palisades and it's beautiful over here. Two lane highways and the whole, yeah. So they say, yeah, it's nice, it's going to be a great weekend. It's going to be a great weekend, it's beautiful this time of year. I would assume the leaves are just poppy. Yeah, just starting to bud, just so it's not green yet, but green is coming. I'll tell you what's unusual right now David, LA is green, California is green. The last few years we've been pretty brown, but we had record setting rain over winter. It's really funny, it's like all the hills are green. Well, you know, you were, you know, that's what's unusual. So yeah, so we're greener than the east coast for now. I don't want to violate your privacy, but as I remember, is it fair to say you live near Calabasas? Not too far, I'm in Studio City, so I'm 10 miles from Calabasas. Was there a time that you lived out there? Because I remember you used to take the motorcycle and from there. Yeah, I ride up there, I ride up through Calabasas and Malibu Canyon and all of that. Yeah, I love riding my motorcycle up there, beautiful. You grew up in Queens, I grew up in Anglewood, New Jersey, and I left early on, moved to California, and I knew that there was a life in New York that was exceptional, even better than in LA, but there was nothing I had to offer the New York metropolitan area to allow me to stay here. And now that I'm back... That's an interesting way to put it. Yeah, I just couldn't make a living, I couldn't make a living in New York. Do you feel like, hmm, maybe I should move back to New York because this would be a better lifestyle than California? It never crosses my mind. Every time I visit New York, you know, my family's still here. I'm like, I love visiting New York, but now I'm a West Coast guy, I love the West. I love the space, I love the weather. Like you said, I'm a motorcycle guy, motorcycle and car culture is big out there. But it's just something about the lifestyle. I like the LA lifestyle versus New York lifestyle. Nothing wrong with New York, it's just not me. I'm glad I grew up here. I think the education of growing up in New York is like nowhere else, but I love living in LA. Where did you start doing stand-up? LA. LA is where I started. You started in 1993. You used to make airplanes, model airplanes, and then you destroyed your brain from the glue, right? That's what I read, so... You know, that's like a Wikipedia version of my story where you look... You ever look on Wikipedia and find out things about yourself, you didn't know, like, hey, I didn't know that. Okay, so I built model airplanes and I sniffed airplane glue. Yeah, why not? I found out I host a podcast. You made airplanes, right? I did. I worked on real airplanes, and it's funny because I learned to do that in New York. I went to Aviation High School in Long Island City, and I was hired by Lockheed Aircraft in Burbank. So I moved to LA and, I mean, I literally got there and just never looked back. And, yeah, for the first, let's see, for 13 years, I spent 10 years building and fixing airplanes and then three years training people and having fun making them laugh before I crossed over. And, you know, back when we built them, we never thought to make the aisle wider so that when you beat a passenger and drag him off the plane, there would be more room like you could comfortably drag him versus having to twist the body to the side to drag it. See, the engineers just don't think of these things. How horrible was that? What do you mean you built airplanes? I know we've talked about this before. I literally built, you know, the main airplane I worked on was the original stealth fighter for your listeners if they want to Google it, just Google F-117. You built a stealth bomber? No, not the bomber, the fighter. The fighter was used in the first Gulf War. No, it was an attack plane, but it wasn't considered a bomber because it only could carry two missiles at a time, or I think they could put four smaller ones, two big ones or four smaller ones. But the big thing about it, it was the first airplane that radar couldn't see. It could fly through a radar area and well, you're old enough to remember. Remember a movie called Firefox with Clint Eastwood? I'm going to pretend that I'm not old enough. Who's Clint Eastwood? Okay, let me refresh. There was a movie. It came out in the early 80s and the plotline was that Russia had invented this top secret airplane that you couldn't see it on radar and it was silent and it would project false images of itself and it had no heat trace or it was basically an invisible airplane and the idea was for Clint Eastwood to steal this airplane from the Russians so that the Americans could make the technology blah, blah, blah, right? Well when that movie came out, we were actually building a plane that could do all of that and it was top secret and we're like, can we tell anyone? Can we tell anyone that we actually know that? Like we make one of those. Wow. And the cool thing, the full circle experience was around 98, 99, I was doing a show in Kuwait and I was at the base where they kept these planes because they used them like I said in the first Iraq-Kuwait war and when we got there and they're showing us the plane and I start talking about it and they're like, hey, wait a minute, how do you know all of this? And I was like, well, I kind of knew it before you did, young man. So you came to work to make a stealth bomber or a stealth fighter, could you find it every day? I mean, was it easy to spot? I'm sorry, that's a quote. No, it's an easy joke. It's an easy joke. It's right there. Yes, we did find it. I will tell you, this is how secret that job was. Again, you're too young to remember this but your older listeners will remember. Big scandal about the $600 toilet seats and the $1,000 hammers and all of that. I remember that. What that was, that's how they, and I learned this later, that's how they financed secret projects, right? So you have this, we were in like an assembly line in a building that is full. That's amazing. That's amazing. It's all sealed up. Like once we went to work, like you went into work and they closed the door and you couldn't leave until the end of the day. It wasn't like you could go in or out or anything like that. So what they did was they had an assembly line of a plane that the government knows about, that people know about and you do a bunch of overcharges on that one to pay for the secret one that people don't know about. And that's how they financed these projects. Well, that's how they used to finance these projects. Who knows what's going on now? So when they talked about a $600 toilet seat, it was like, well, actually it's an $8 toilet seat and $592 is going to finance the secret military project. You know, I just remembered a joke from my act. I apologize for bringing this up, but Reagan was president, and I remember there was like a $700 coffee maker. And this was like, I just started doing comedy and I said, you know, for $700, I want that coffee maker to brew it and blow me. And it worked at the time because I was starting, but you know, they can't audit the Pentagon and I guess that's why. Right, and that's how they do it. And you know, when that plane, when it was declassified, the person who gave up the secret was a congressman. Some congressman wanted to prove like this is what we, you know, this is what we do, this is what we authorize and he was like, look at this badass plane we've been building. And everybody was like, you weren't supposed to mention it, you know. So you had top secret clearance. What's that like? Do they investigate it? Well, for me, it was actually very easy because they check back to when you're 18 and I started at Lock Teed when I was like 18 and three weeks. So the funniest thing about that was I moved to California and then two weeks later I got friends in New York calling me like, hey man, what'd you do out there? The FBI was asking about you. Yeah, so they do the background check and the FBI, you know, I mean, again, I'm a kid just out of high school so there wasn't much to investigate. There wasn't much trouble I could have gotten into at that point but yeah, they did the background check and the whole thing and I had the secret and then the top secret clearance. By the time you were 18, you were making airplanes. Yeah, yeah, it's an amazing, when I look back on it, I mean it was, it's what I did and I had a bunch of friends from high school and we all did it. We just had sort of a reunion out in LA of the guys who stayed in California or make it. But yeah, when you look back on it, it was ridiculous like we had just learned to build planes in high school and now we're building the most advanced top secret plane, you know, in the world at the time. And to us it was like, okay, just another airplane, you know. What year again was this? This was 80 to 84, I worked there. 80 to 84. Okay, and then I see, how does your mind work? In that sense, in the mechanical sense, I have a great appreciation of mechanical things and I can just kind of see how things go together and how things are supposed to work. That would probably explain why I never got married because I'd look at a woman and be like, this thing just doesn't, it doesn't work right. It doesn't know what the hell. It's like marriage, marriage is like the bumblebee. If you show a bumblebee to people like you who know how things fly, they cannot explain how a bumblebee flies. Well, there are actually, there are two theories of flight. Okay, there's what's known as the Bernoulli principle. And the Bernoulli principle is that as air moves faster, pressure drops, which creates lift. And that's the theory that the air rushing over the wing creates a low pressure area above the wing, which lifts the plane. But the other theory is, if you put power behind it, it'll fly. That's the theory that says if you throw a brick, it will fly. So those are the two theories that come together. But yeah, the bumblebee thing was a poster in the hangar where we were building because that plane was also the first one that it couldn't fly without the computers. The computers had to account for the aerodynamics of the airplane. So it literally was like a bumblebee and like that without the computers, this thing can't fly. But getting back to women, not air beyond bumblebees. Yeah, well, marriage is like the bumblebee. You just have to believe in the honey. Did they ever figure out why a bumblebee flies? I think it has to do with the speed of the wings, if I remember correctly. But mathematically, it shouldn't work, but it does. But I think it had to do with the speed that they can vibrate their wings. Is that how a helicopter flies? No. You know what a helicopter is? What you think is the propeller on top of a helicopter is actually a wing. It's a wing that rotates. So it's built like the airplane wings. If you could imagine airplane wings spinning fast enough to create lift. That's how a helicopter flies. You flew today, correct? Yeah. What airline? United. Seriously. I talked about this on my podcast. I'm one of these people that's very torn because I'm a platinum level flyer with a million miles on United. But when you say that, you know, I'm going to walk away and I'll never fly this airline again. I'm kind of vested in flying on this airline. And the other thing, and you notice, David, you travel too, they all suck. You know, it's like, it's United's turn in the barrel. United didn't do anything that Delta or American wouldn't have done in the same position. They just happen to do it. Like, they all suck. There's no airline that doesn't treat you like shit. You know? So, yeah, obviously I'm not happy with them. The CEO did say that they promised they will no longer physically drag passengers off the plane. So we got that going for us, you know? So far, Delta and American haven't made that promise. They still have one free drag to get away with. Well, there'd be no flight. Bernali's principle is all about drag, isn't it? Why does it like to have a million miles? You know, it's cool. This is the benefit they give you for having a million miles. I'll be a gold level flyer for life. So in other words, if I stop flying so much, I maintain gold level. Now, the problem with that is that was great when there were numerous airlines. As they merge, what they don't tell you is like, when United merges with Continental, now you've got, you know, the 10,000 gold members of Continental and the 10,000 gold members. So your chance of getting an upgrade or any benefit was just cut in half, because twice as many people are in it. But it's good. I'll tell you what, I don't know, because let me tell you something. They don't treat me that special, and I'm platinum with a million miles. So I don't know how they're treating you in group four. I think in group four they might just beat you with a stick and tie you in a chair. I don't know. You know, it's like, look, I'm platinum and they ain't too happy with me. What are you doing with you? How tall are you? 6'3". How do you sit and coach? And why isn't there a class action suit? One of the benefits is I get the, I forget what they call it, but the coach seats with the extra leg room. So I sit in that section of the plane where you get a coach seat, but you have business class leg room. But if you can't afford, let's say you're just a normal person without a million miles. Don't you have a lawsuit again? No, no, you just, you know, you just suffer. And as a matter of fact, that's being tall if you're overweight, right? If you're over a certain weight, you have to buy two seats. Seriously, I'm not making that up. I don't know what the weight is, but there's like over a certain size, you know, you got to buy two seats. Wow. So you talk about having some money, you know, then it becomes, well, for the price of two seats, you could just buy one seat in business, you know? Right. So, yeah, it's uncomfortable at times and for, if you are, it's not even a matter of being six foot three. I think if you're six feet tall and you're in the regular airplane seat, you're going to be cramped, right? Because they've shortened the pitch, like they've shortened the leg room to fit that extra row of seats in and sell those extra seats. And this is why you have this air rage where people are like, you recline your seat that two inches and you bang the knee at a person behind you, then they hit the seat and blah, blah, blah. And they've definitely been cases of, you know, people getting into fights or coming close to fighting over that two inch recline of the seat. And that's where the flight attendants, they catch hell, right? Because some guy in an office, you know, makes this policy and then some engineer designs it, oh, well, we can make the seat this much smaller, blah, blah, blah. But then when two people are on a red eye, tired and pissed off, it's the flight attendant who has to try to get between them when they're about to kill each other. What's the best flight you ever had? Virgin Atlantic business class. There's two flights I did that were incredible. I did the Virgin business class from London to LA. And they literally, like, you have to tell the flight attendant leave me alone. Like they're just, would you like a blanket? What would you like to eat? They'll cook you in the lounge before you get on the plane. They, like, have a chef in the lounge. Anything you'd like will make for you, blah, blah, blah, blah. That one was incredible. And back rubs, right? Don't think of back rubs. They have massages and they also have a barber. They have the whole thing. I'm not kidding. I'm not, I'm not exaggerating or making this up. No, they have massages, a barber, you know, you can get a pedicure while you're waiting for the lounge and all of that. That's all there. A spa. Basically, they have a spa in the lounge. And then the other one I flew that was incredible was Singapore Air. I was doing this gig in Indonesia and they flew me business class on Singapore. And that's the one where your seat folds down into a bed and they put a curtain around you so you have your own little private room to fly in. And they have, I think they have, like, one flight attendant for every four people or something like that. Some crazy, you know, ratio of, yeah, we're here to take care of, you know. Those are the flights that are amazing. You don't want them to end. No, then you're comfortable. You're like, yeah, if I flew like this, but then you see the cost of the ticket and, like, when we did the Virgin America thing, that was part of a military gig, part of a USO thing. So they donate the seats, you know, as a donation to the USO. But we saw the price of the tickets and the tickets cost more than we were getting paid to do the gig. Wow. Yeah. Do you think, because I, you know, I always think about how the environment affects my mood. I often think, you know, if I didn't live in America, I'd be a lot happier. If I, you know, when I go to Canada or Italy, I'm happy. When I come back to America, I'm tense. I'm afraid I'm going to get shot. When I'm on a train, it is impossible for me to be anxious or depressed. I think I could, I mean, I think heaven to me would be first class accommodations on a train, just a permanent train ride. I also think the few times that I've flown first class, I think I could just sit on a plane forever and just keep flying around the world. There was a time when you could buy, the rich people were doing this in the 70s and the 80s. I think it was like $250,000. You could buy a lifetime first class seat on American Airlines, which means you could pretty much just live in the air. Yeah, I don't, I don't know if they still do that. I know they do have some of these, like around the world tickets. Like you can get on and off planes and go around the world over a period of time. Maybe it's a year or something like that. I will tell you this, that if I'm going across the country, business class is worth it. You know, like if you're flying a two-hour flight or whatever, it's not that big a difference. It's nice and depending on the price, I may or may not do it. But if I'm going, like this trip, coming from LA here, I would rather, I did a flight where I had to stop and change planes, but I'd rather do that and get business class than go direct and coach. Yeah, I'm all about the suffering. I always think, you know, what's my, you know, if I could save $300, $500 bucks, $6 hours, that's, what is that, $50 bucks an hour? That's how I figure, I'm making $50 bucks an hour by not paying extra for, you know. You know, it's funny, my business manager was the opposite because I used to do that and she was like, look, your travel is business. Just spend the money. She was like, if you, you know, you got it, like so you'll be comfortable on a five hour flight. Just spend the money. So then I started doing it. And you accumulate perks faster. You accumulate miles and all of that stuff faster. So there are advantages to doing it, but flying, it's, it's the work. You know, when people ask what I do, I'm like, look, they pay me to travel. I tell jokes for free. Wow. That's the gig. You know, everybody who travels on business on a more or less weekly basis, you know, I'm probably in an airport 40 weeks out of the year. And yeah, it's a job. Are you on the road that much? You know, by the way, John Fugels saying, and I thought I was going to see you on Fugels saying's series XM show today, but you were on it too and I was on it for and people were calling in to ask to speak and he's been gone for two hours. I love John's show. As you know, John's show is intelligent and he lets you be you and it's just phenomenal. But you told him that you're on the road most of the time. Is that true? 40 weeks out of the year? I'm a comic, you know, and I was telling him in the past few years, I've really like I've always been a comic but it's been more like embracing it like yeah, this is what I do. I love when I get a TV spot you get the occasional acting job or voice over job. But this is what I do, man. I'm a comic. So I'm not in clubs all the time. I do some clubs. It's a combination. I do clubs. I do corporate. My favorite thing that I get to work with are a lot of jazz artists. I open for some jazz artists. I host some jazz festivals and I love that because I love the music and I love that synergy between music and comedy, you know, on a creative level. But yeah, this is what I do. So, you know, I got to travel. It's part of the job. So when I say I'm in the airport 40 weeks a year, sometimes it's just for one night. Like I don't even, I was telling a friend I don't even consider that travel. If I fly out Thursday, work Thursday night and come home Friday as far as I'm concerned, I didn't even count. You know, but club weeks are three or four days. There are two American art forms that I believe are purely American and that would be jazz and stand-up comedy. Is that a fair statement? Yeah, I'd say that's pretty accurate. I'd say that is a pretty pretty accurate statement. When I was starting out, they used to play rock and roll in the clubs and I remembered Mort Saul, who started in San Francisco opening for jazz musicians, Dave Brubeck and I would say shouldn't you be playing jazz? Because jazz is what gets the audience in the mood to think and you know, with jazz you get a premise and then variations on the theme and then you come back to the premise and then you go away and come back and the musicians will test how far away they can go from the theme and then bring you back. That's what stand-up is and they would say to me no, no, no, we got to rev up the crowd. Comedy is the new rock and roll. And I maintained that had they kept the jazz roots I never would have had to do a joke about a coffee machine blowing me. Well, that is the beauty of it. You know, you talk about San Francisco and that was a place where it took place on that level. Yeah, on the creative level they are the same thing and what you said is exactly true. Like it would be great if you have an audience if you have an audience that gets jazz they're going to love comedy you know, creative comedy. I mean, one of the best compliments I got was when I'm just doing crowd work, right? And to comics it's just fun doing crowd work and sometimes I test myself like how can I tie these things in or doing whatever and there were a bunch of musicians at the show and they were like, man, that's jazz that's just straight improvisation we love that, you know and coming from guys whose whole musical world is improvisation that's a high compliment but you're right if you know I get the rock and roll aspect of it I've always understood that aspect of comedy I've always understood the money making aspect of comedy you know, put asses in seats sell drinks, blah, blah, blah but when you get those rooms and you know what I'm talking about where it's just creativity and the audience appreciates the creativity of comedy there used to be a room on Vancouver Island and it was a jazz club during the week and comedy on Friday and Saturday John Fox book then I did it with Pat Wilson Pat Wilson was booking it when I did it but you could feel it like in the room, like it had that smoky velvet room feel like you'd never have to raise your voice you know, that kind of room and I loved it, it was just so creative and that's a beautiful thing, yeah it's great when those two come together and a jazz audience is a great comedy audience because you have people who want to go past loud noises people who appreciate nuance and so on and again, I definitely get the rock and roll aspect of comedy and you know any of us would want to be a rock star right, it's nice to make a few million dollars a year let's not kid ourselves you know, I know a few millionaires and it looks like a nice life but from a creative standpoint if I can find a good living and I can do the creative stuff and do the stuff that I love then that's cool too who are some of the best jazz musicians around these days? a friend of mine I'm biased but I think he's brilliant a guy named Marcus Miller what does he play? he plays the bass but that's putting it mildly just to give you an idea this guy at 19 Miles Davis put him in his band okay now think about what you were doing at 19, I think about what I was doing at 19 there was no danger of Miles Davis hiring me unless he needed a stealth fighter but yeah, Marcus played with Miles and then he was Lovavandrov's music director for all of those hits through the 80s so he did the R&B thing but he has his own jazz vibe, I'm a big fan and friend of his there's a guy named Robert Glasper a brilliant pianist who he has two different bands he has a jazz trio and then he has a R&B band called the Robert Glasper experiment and he's won Grammys on both sides you know so that's kind of brilliant and then the masters like Herbie Hancock and you know Miles people like that, shit Korea I've always loved them and yeah there are some young guys there's a guy named Christian Scott who's an incredible trumpet player that I listened to there are some younger guys guys in their 30s and 40s who are making some incredible jazz and it's very cool because they're using all influences now like there's the hip hop has become an influence in jazz and vice versa and that's really cool what some people are doing with that so do you listen to jazz at home and when do you listen to it yeah I listen to it probably more than anything else probably more than anything else I listen to jazz at home I listen to it in the car and yeah that's that's my music that's my sound track L.A.K. jazz yeah you know the problem with radio radio doesn't give jazz enough to play or play meaning that like when you listen to a K jazz they do a lot of the old traditional jazz what's what they call straight ahead jazz but you won't hear a lot of the fusion or the the newer the more contemporary stuff being done I've been told to you know I don't know anything about this stuff but purists look down on that stuff right yeah they do and then they don't you know and this is what I mean like a guy like Robert Glasper right who has this electronic R&B band and does covers of like smells like teen spirit you know people like oh well what is he blah blah blah and then he does a duet with Herbie Hancock where him and Herbie are both on you know traditional acoustic pianos and you're like oh yeah so tell Herbie this kid doesn't know anything about jazz because what the hell does Herbie know you know what I mean so so yeah that's what that's what proves the snobs wrong when these guys who you know like I say like like Marcus Marcus plays an electric bass right so you do oh well you know if you're not playing that a big acoustic bass or this or that and it's like yeah he wrote the song Tutu for Miles Davis so you know so he's got that going for him you know what I mean so yeah so the jazz snobs sorry but you know and the thing about that is jazz was always about improvisation and change right I mean back in the 50s when they were first starting rock and roll those musicians learned how to play from jazz musicians you know and that's what they talk about like that's what they used to listen to right jazz and blues musicians and they transitioned and made it into rock and roll so there's always going to be a fight for that traditional thing and the traditional thing is cool but the music is about creativity and about pushing it to the next whatever the next level is going to be I mean in hip hop you look at you know it's funny you got a guy like a Bob James who's a jazz pianist ask Bob if he loves hip hop he loves hip hop because because rappers have been sampling his jazz and his funk and he's made you know probably a couple million dollars on the side from me you know from rappers sampling his music he's like oh yeah big fan of hip hop love the hip hop love the hip hop are you a fan of comedy yes can you watch can you enjoy stand up yeah I like watching people who do things different than I do and then I just like watching just great stand ups I don't have you seen Chappelle's new stuff on Netflix not yet I'm backed up yeah it's great I mean to watch Dave Chappelle do an hour is like oh that's how this is supposed to be done how do you watch stand up I was talking to this professor Corey Brett Schneider who's a regular on the show he's a constitutional law professor and he was teaching me how to read a supreme court decision and we've talked about how do you watch Shakespeare and I always say well you got to know the story first so you can appreciate the language and the acting if you're trying to ferret out the plot you're going to be lost how do you approach stand up when you watch it I think it depends on who's doing it if I'm watching Chappelle it's almost like I'm a student you know I'm wide like wow look what he can do look how he did this look where he went with that you know and then he's got I don't want to ruin it for you because you haven't seen it but if you see the special he does a couple of things where and you know the highest compliment we comics can give is like man I wish I thought of that you know and he came up with this thread that he ran through one of the specials that was like oh my god that is so funny to where by the third time he did it like all he said was the premise and the crowd just lost it because it's such a it was an unusual yet brilliant thread to run through a comedy special you know then then sometimes I watch people like Ali Long she just makes me laugh you know I like somebody young comic some of them are I don't know I don't know how to describe it there's some of it that I think is fake and I think it's like the emperor has no clothes you know what I mean like like people are acting like this is hip and different but just for the sake of saying it's hip and different and then some of them I think are really onto something that is really funny and unique Jared Carmichael is another one I can watch Jared I I watch him for his premises because he comes up with ideas and the way he states the premise is funny and it makes you think before he starts doing the jokes you know so I admire that and then like I say the masters you know to watch Louis Black do an hour like I can't watch Lou too much because I'll start doing Lou you know because it's just I love it so much and it's like I don't know how to explain it so sometimes I watch as a fan and sometimes I watch as a student let me get back to Chappelle and freedom on stage if you're free on stage and that comes with celebrity or a really kind audience you can go into areas that you never thought possible the audience will almost take you there it's almost like a plane taking off right if you have a great audience is it Bernalies principle I mean they'll go they'll go anywhere with Dave because you know he's gonna make it funny you know Dave is one of the few people that I would pay to watch think out loud he thinks out loud and he would do like six hour sets at the laugh factory can you get there are you ever in a city are you ever obviously you are but I mean can you just throw out your act and do an hour and just fly I do that in a jazz world I do that in a jazz world because I do these jazz cruises and you know there's 40 jazz musicians and I'm the only comic so the first show I do I do material but the second show okay you guys have seen my material it's the same audience I'm not doing the same hour and that's where I'll just start playing around and I'm surprised at how much they'll come along with me for the ride and I'm just looking for things and then yeah sometimes you know it's the other times I love doing that is an empty night at the laugh factory some of my best sets because that stage is so home to me and when it's you know 30 people it's like alright look I'm not going to jump around and shout and we're not doing the set let's talk for a while let's see where this goes and I love doing it there and Dave does the same thing with you know 400 people in a club or 2,000 people in a theater because they know him and they know what he does and and you know part of that is just something you could do it anyway you know what I mean like I don't think he's ever been one limited by the desire to make the crowd laugh you know I'm fascinated by this because you're really doing it and you're you're out on the road 40 weeks and you're the jazz audience is would you say that the audience is kind of like another instrument so that you're working with them it's almost when you're working on new material you're kind of playing your tune and then you listen to them and it's back and forth it's this great combination yes and no I think it's more you're there I'm sorry I just had to look at something something I got to take care of but anyway no I think I don't know if I'd say they're an instrument as much as it is they will just they appreciate it I think that's more I think it's more their appreciation so they appreciate you experimenting with stuff and they're like oh yeah that works oh yeah that's you know or maybe there's something funny there but I haven't found it yet but so I don't think I'm not trying to play them I'm not trying to to make them laugh I'm just you know what I mean I'm just are you dancing with them or boxing with them I like boxing better than dancing yeah I like throwing jabs I like throwing jabs and I like throwing the hook that they don't see coming right and knocking them on their ass you know and they appreciate that they appreciate the hook that they didn't see coming the marquee to Queensbury there are rules to boxing aren't isn't that the marquee to Queensbury yeah this is what I remember about you we did the gala in Montreal it was a political show and you were incredibly clean and I wasn't this was like three or four maybe five years ago and your act was immaculate and I watched it thinking wow you have high standards do you get pissed off if the person in front of you is doing jokes about their coffee maker blowing them not really I think you know what bothers me more when someone takes a premise and does nothing with it then then they destroy the premise you know like like take a Ben Carson because lately I just have fun with this idiot he annoys me so it's fun making but then you have somebody oh that Ben Carson stupid Ben Carson slaves or immigrants and then they don't and now it's like okay so now that premise has been trashed with no punchline or no joke or Trump's an idiot well why like give me a reason say something go beyond stating the obvious even though the obvious can get a laugh take it to it you know what I mean take it to or don't touch it it's like if your whole act is you know jokes about sex jokes or jokes about whatever you know and then you go into politics but you don't do politics so now you're just stating a bunch of premises or words that you've heard before and trashing them I would rather you do coffee make or blow job jokes you know not to say that no one should ever do politics or whatever you know do whatever you want but yeah that bothers me more I don't if you work dirty then work dirty but don't ruin a good premise joke that annoys me well I know you've had a long day and you've been longer once more I just want to ask you about the Texas military bases and your podcast who's paying attention and I also just want to know if you had any thoughts on Don Rickles oh three great topics I'll start with Don Rickles and you know you mentioned the Gallas in Montreal a few years ago I did a Gallas hosted by Don Rickles and truly one of the great moments in my comedic life if not in my life period was getting roasted backstage by Don Rickles you know it's on my Facebook page if you go to Facebook slash Alonzo Bowden it's on there and Rickles just rips into me starting with uh names Alonzo that's good you took a white man's name so the cops won't think you did it and you know David I mean is there a more legendary moment in comedy than Don Rickles just ripping on you you know with Rickles humor I loved it that was great um you know he's one of those old masters I mean we're losing those guys these guys had one liners and they were quick you know I was reading like they were just all kind of things about Rickles online and everywhere else they were talking about I don't know where he was but Barack Obama was there it was some presidential oh yeah Obama he was at my house last week yeah you forgot the mop you know and Don said that to Barack Obama you know Obama just falls out laughing because it was Don Rickles like nobody else can say to him you forgot the mop but Rickles bam yeah well actually I remember I remember people saying he crossed the line on that joke I don't think he did and I don't think Barack Obama thought he did okay because the thing about Don Rickles yeah Don Rickles listen Don Rickles said things that especially today you know that that might have been funny in 72 that were horrible today but it was Don Rickles saying and if there's one thing about Don Rickles that you knew there was never any hatred behind his jokes right you just you knew there was never now there are some other insult comedians that and you could tell when they mean it you know what I mean and that's when it's not funny that's when it's awkward and blah blah blah Rickles if he hated anyone he hated everyone equally including himself I saw him do this thing he was like making fun of these Hawaiians doing some weird Polynesian noises now who does he mean of course it was cheap and racist but it was hilarious and the thing about Rickles you always saw the person he was making fun of laughing about it I never saw the person that he was making fun of not laugh about it I mean he made fun of Sinatra and didn't get killed you know and he was free I mean I've been watching I've been watching him on YouTube for years now and he was free I mean he would go on Carson and I think how does he fly this way without and he would crash and get right back up and keep a lot like Jonathan Winters the growing up were your parents offended by him no no my mother has a great sense of humor she might be the funniest person I know my mom always made me laugh so she would laugh at good humor if something was funny she'd laugh at it and again with Don Rickles there was something about him you can tell the opposite would be Michael Richards right Kramer when Kramer went off at the laugh factory the crowd so you were talking about the crowd earlier as a musical instrument I've always seen the crowd as like the crowd senses things like you know how they say a dog can sense something a dog can sense fear or aggression or whatever I've always felt the crowd is the same way the crowd knows the truth and if you crack a racist remark or some kind of remark like that if you mean it the crowd knows you mean it right and that was what happened with Kramer so you're saying when a man stands in front of an audience and screams the N word a hundred times he means it well I have a serious no but I mean then you see like a Don Rickles right and when Don Rickles makes a joke about me going to San Quentin like you know it's come on that shit is funny you know that he's not Jeff Sessions who really means he wants to send me to San Quentin you know you can always tell and the crowd can tell same thing with jokes about about women you know women know when it's a joke about women and they know when it's a misogynist hating women and so on or vice versa when a woman makes a joke about a man you know and things like that I've always felt the audience kind of the audience knows the truth and with Don Rickles and you know I could be dead wrong right maybe they you know they know the secret but I just never felt any animosity toward anyone Don Rickles ever made fun of I just never felt it never saw it never saw anything never saw him make fun of one group any more than any other group I think 20 years from now 50 years from now he'll be remembered I do I think he will be like a time capsule that holds up and is fascinating he is and truly dangerous truly I I know you got to go and I apologize no I'm fine I'm fine I remember growing up my mother watched him on a Dean Martin roast and he said oh Nipsey Russell is here let me make you feel at home all aboard and my mother said turn him off turn him off 10 years later I hear this maniacal laughing coming from her bedroom and she's watching Don Rickles and just I think and that's kind of like the politically correct movement my mother was being overly protective but didn't consult the people who she thought she was protecting as to whether or not it was offensive right well another great example of that was Archie Bunker mm-hmm right because they always say that all in the family like they wouldn't it couldn't be on TV today like Archie couldn't say the things that he said but the thing was when Archie said it it was so genuinely ignorant that you didn't hate him for it that's what made it funny but now when when what's his name the fat radio guy Limbaugh the fat radio guy suffices yeah when Limbaugh says the same thing that Archie Bunker said you know that Rush Limbaugh means it and that's what that's why it's a hateful thing and you know so and again this is where the audience you got to give the audience some credit for intelligence and for the ability to discern what's being said so the audience that watches the same audience that sees Archie Bunker and sees Rush Limbaugh they're like oh this guy's an actor being funny this guy is absolutely dangerous or this guy is saying exactly what I think and you know let me go put my hood on and let's have a party very quickly who's paying attention I love doing it it started with my look at the the media I think the most guilty party in what's crumbling now in our society which is intelligence and truth it's a media's fault because it's always been their job to hold the politicians to a standard when Donald Trump says you know a few years ago Syria is a mistake we should never bomb Syria the president can't drop a bomb without congress blah blah blah and then he does it there's no one in the media who holds the beat to the fire who stands up in the press conference and says now wait a minute so who's paying attention stems from my frustration with the media and the fact that comedians we're the only ones left telling the truth you know as Lewis Black once said look we didn't want this job but no one else will fucking do it we'd much rather tell dick jokes but since no one else can tell the truth and you know fortunately you have people like Lewis and John Oliver and the Daily Show and stuff like that and you know so yeah that's where that came from and you're going off to Texas to entertain our troops I love I love entertaining the troops the military I've been fortunate enough to entertain them overseas and here in the US and it is a mutual admiration they love the fact that when they're overseas we bring them a taste of home you know and we get to see what they do and actually appreciate what they do you know the interesting thing with like Iraq the people who are saying you know support the troops support the troops well we're going to raise your taxes a dollar to help no we can't raise taxes to help the veterans you know so to actually get out there and give them a break from their reality for an hour and every comic who's done it or who does it we all love doing it and then the other thing is we get to make fun of people they can't make fun of like their officers or their sergeants or stuff like that and it's been my experience those guys have a great sense of humor about it those guys and women you know I mean not disrespecting them but just making fun of the hierarchy of the military you know and yeah I love entertaining the troops and it's always been a good experience and every now and then they let you you know play with one of their toys drive a home beer so they haven't let me blow up anything I've asked I've asked like can't we just say it was an accident and blow this fishing boat out of the water but so far they haven't let me do that Mike too before you go and thank you and we're talking we've been talking with Alonzo Bowden he's live in nyak new york friday tonight and saturday two shows each night correct right and what time do they start seven thirty and nine forty five please go see him and go download his podcast on itunes who's paying attention I have two core values when it comes to politics medicare for all that is if there's you cannot argue with me on medicare for all if you don't believe in medicare for all there's nothing to talk about it's you're another animal as far as I'm concerned medicare for all and the other issue that I'm kind of becoming almost axiomatic about is a draft I think that we need to have a draft and I get that I get that because it levels the playing field that that's something they said that when everybody served in the military we all cared a lot more about it so I understand that that makes sense and I think it makes us better citizens we pay more attention we learn to work together we also learn to respect and loathe authority simultaneously yeah yeah well and what's even you know loaded or at the very least question it at the very least question though that's a good thing I think values wise how great would it be if we you know since we're always claiming to be a quote Christian nation like what if we actually did stuff Jesus would do you know like help poor people help sick people you know not hate someone because they're different like like if Jesus came back now he'd last what 15 minutes especially where you're heading Texas the right the right wing would be like wait listen Jesus and we know you snuck in here with your peace and love and all of that but we're gonna have to shut you down you know I mean it would so wouldn't it be great if we if we actually adopted since we claim to and all that like like if we actually adopted those principles like like honestly I would hate to be a Christian leader if Jesus shows up you know if Jesus shows up tomorrow I'll be like hey Jesus I wasn't with them I tried to tell them I would I know I'm with you they I don't know what they're doing I don't think Jesus was building a wall or checking Jesus never asked a leper if he had coverage wait wait before I lay hands let me see you you got coverage alright put your legs in the basket and get the hell out of here not once not once did Jesus not once did Jesus Jesus didn't check how much money you had before he turned the water into wine you want wine what kind of money you got I Alonzo Bowden will be at Leavity live in NIAC tonight and tomorrow two shows go to AlonzoBowden.com for more information thank you Alonzo David this was really fun I appreciate it I love the long form interview and you allowing me to talk and to catch up with my friend and be funny