 Dedicated to the strength of the nation, now heard on more than 1,300 radio stations. Proudly, we hail. Starring Marjorie Reynolds in Suzy of the Sardis. The United States Army and United States Air Force presentation. Now here is our producer, the well-known Hollywood showman, C.P. McGregor. Thank you, Wendell, and greetings from Hollywood, ladies and gentlemen. Welcome to your Theatre of Stars, where each week, famous names from film land's capital, step from the screen to our microphone for your entertainment. One of the most glorious and radiant of all motion picture stars steps into the feature role of our bright comedy. Marjorie Reynolds is our leading lady, and our play title is Suzy of the Sardis. Suzy, that's Marjorie, works in an office and has a crush on her boss. She wouldn't like me to call it a crush, for to her it's the real thing. I guess maybe it is too. Anyway, she handles King Cobra's snakes and becomes a target for a night thrower all because of love. I curtain in a moment, but first, Wendell Niles. America is proud of her soldiers and airmen. For good reason, too. Your regular army and U.S. Air Force men are some of the finest in the country, and they're doing important work. They are a symbol of democracy, their free way of life. They're helping maintain the security of America and peace in the world. They represent the people of our country and their desire to lead a happy and tranquil life. Give them your support. Now once again, our producer. The curtain rises on the first act of Suzy of the Sardis starring Marjorie Reynolds as Suzy. All his youth and excitement today for the circuses in town. From a window of the advertising offices of William Gerard Incorporated, three people watch the circus. Bill Gerard, the boss himself, Suzy Drake, his pretty and daffy secretary, and the office boy, Suzy's youthful admirer, Ambrose Grebs. They are watching the parade and getting younger every minute, which may explain the reactions to some of the strange events about to happen to them. Here they come, Suzy, the wild animals. Marcel Amatige and his lions on tiger. Emperor, the royal Bengal tiger and other creatures of his fright. Oh, boy, there's a certain air about a circus. Yeah, but you'll get used to it after a while. Let me run out and buy two tickets for us, huh, Suzy? Hey, will you look at that. Princess Tanagra and her great King Cobra's. I knew Tanagra and Cleveland six years ago. A snake charmer? Oh, how well I remember Tanagra. Is she a princess or is she from Flatbush? East Cleveland, Ohio. Hey, Suzy, find out where Tanagra's staying, will you? Probably some convenient snake pit. Oh, telephone or hotel for me, will you? Yes, Mr. Gerard. And if she's not in a room, I'll have her paged in the chandelier of the main ballroom. Gee, Suzy, I had a hard time promoting two circus tickets yesterday for tonight. And I finally got in touch with Tanagra, the serpent of the Nile. Yeah? Oh, what's she like? I think she likes snakes. She ought to make a lot of friends in town. Well, after five words with a princess, I was all in favor of a republic. What's wrong with Tanagra? She talks with too much muscle. And she likes Bill Gerard. She's coming to see him. When? Tanagra! Now. Gee, Tanagra. Who shall I say is calling? And I do mean calling. And just tell Bill is Tanagra, dearie. Not Tanagra, dearie, of the Beacon Hill, dearie. You're cute, aren't you? I manage never to carry my own tray at the automate. Well, suppose you buzz your boss and say I'm here. Give me Mr. William Gerard, please. Where can I put the suitcase where it'll be safe? I put it right behind that extra desk, Princess. Here, let me handle it for you. Oh, no, no, no. It's valuable. Don't look valuable, all those holes in it. Well, it's the Holes Game Swiss Cheese's reputation. Oh, that's very true. Is it all right here? That's just fine, Princess. It won't be in anybody's way there, I'm sure. Oh, no. Princess, may I have your autograph? In ink or in cobra venom, Ambrose? Listen to me, sister. I'm sorry, Princess, but Mr. Gerard is all tied up. Conference with Mr. Wrapping Twine. Oh, yeah? Yeah. Well, tell you what you can do, dearie. Does that go both ways, dearie? Pick up that telephone and call Rockwood 2311 and ask for Doc. I'll talk to him. I'll bet he'll be surprised that you can. And after you get Doc on the phone, you might call Mr. Gerard on the office phone again. And this time, don't hold down the hook on the telephone. Get it? All is fair and love and war. Well, the war is over. I didn't sign anything. Hello? Doc? One moment, Doc. The Queen Mary is in. Princess Tanagra. Oh, I thought you were due for a promotion. Give me that phone. May I have my left thumb back, please? Hello, Doc. Tanagra. Well, how the heck are you? Left by now. Sure on them town, didn't you hear? I did before she got on the phone. Here's my problem. Baby is teething. Baby? And when can I bring her in? Oh, hello, Bill. There's a Princess Tanagra to see you. Well, come on. I have to be all right, Doc. I'll tell her, Bill. Yeah, Doc, you said it. Well, see you tomorrow then. Yeah. Yeah, bye. Mr. Gerard will be right out. Well done. Well, if he is, he will be soon. I don't like that crack. That's what the thin man said as he slipped through the sidewalk. Tanagra! Oh, Billy Willey. I think I'm going to... Relax, Susie. Tanagra, you look the same as ever. That's a compliment. Now, Susie, this is Tanagra, a very old friend of mine. Well, she certainly is. But she doesn't look 50, does she? That is absolutely the limit. You're way over the limit. Why? You don't want to live forever? Oh, come on, girls, girls. Why, you let me at her, Billy. Let me at her. Now there, you ladies. Break it up. Break it up. Bill, I have news for you. She is broken up. Oh, let me get a pistol of that bleach hair. Oh, Tanagra. Come on. Come along with me. Come on. Oh, well, all right. We'll step into my office. Come along, Princess. Yeah, I want to talk to you, Bill. I've been thinking about retiring from circus life. I like you, and I'd like to work for you. Maybe a nice sex job like that. Well, come into my office. Maybe there's something I can do for you. Susie, did you hear that? I heard it, and this I know. There isn't room for Tanagra and me in this office. Oh, Bill, it never fire you. Well, I'd quit first. Good morning. Now what? And good morning. Who's he? And good morning. And did a certain lady named Princess Tanagra happen to? Well, good morning. Your mother is inside, sunny boy. Ho-ho. Do I look that young? There's another way to look at it. You haven't had a tiff with Aunt Tanagra? Catch as catch can, and I caught it. Aunt Tanagra's a tough customer, girly. By now, she ought to be. Are you an arrack, mister? Son, I am the act, from start to finish. I'm the sparkling brains of the whole performance. Well, I think your aunt wants to get out of the act. Fine. Well, not with me it isn't. She wants my job, and I like my job, and I like her admire. Well, I like to work for Mr. Girard, and I don't care for your aunt to come in here, and, well, I just don't like it. Oh, you mean she wants to work here? Yes. Well, this is serious. By the way, when do you go to lunch? Whenever anybody asks me, and thank you very much. So, let's get out of here. Gee, Royal, I'd do anything for Bill Girard, but if he doesn't want me to work for him any more, I'll go to work for another advertising company, like Gwyn and Baradot. Oh, I wouldn't do that, Susie. Well, I want to save Bill from Tanagra, even if she is your aunt. Oh, no, let him have Tanagra. Well, what about your act? Listen, I've just been waiting for Tanagra to walk out in the act. She's been getting hisses from the Cobras? Tanagra doesn't understand that our act's a business as well as a fine art. Even snake charming needs bookkeeping, a little basic arithmetic. Why don't you use adders instead of Cobras, then? The real answer is to have a real businesswoman with business experience in the act. Um, like you. Me? For example, I've been trying for weeks to get off a letter to the man who supplies us with our snakes. Someone with chronic delirium tremens, no doubt. Now, with you around, I could simply say, Susie, take a letter. All ready, sir. Uh, Mr. Jones and Jones, sideshow supplies, poisonous and non-poisonous snakes. Uh, Wrigley Building, Chicago. Go on. Now, you see, you've got it already. With you around, that letter would have been written long ago, and we'd have our new snakes. You couldn't have the old ones retreaded. We need snakes desperately. Look under any rock or behind any steering wheel. Mostly convertible. The rather unsettled conditions in East India are making it almost impossible to obtain our King Cobras when they need them. That's what's worrying Tanagra. She's looking for security and a new job. Well, I can see where she'd have her doubts about a future that's full of poisonous snakes. Cobras, especially. For the right girl, there's more to the future than just that. Much more. You mean you're thinking of getting rattlers, too? Listen, I know the entire circus and sideshow business topped the bottom. Inside out, I've got plenty of angles. Do me this favor, will you? Come to the show tonight. Well... I want you to catch me in my act. Catch you in your act? Then we can talk further in my tent. Catch you in your act? Please. All right. Shall I bring a net or a basket? What's up, Ambrose? I've built your artist having dinner with Tanagra after the show tonight. I heard him tell her on the phone today. Let him. But I think he's planned a big night. He won't be in the office until noon. He says for you not to come in until noon, either. Having dinner with her, huh? Well, bone appetite. What's that? Bone appetite. French for maybe a bone will stick in her throat. Is that all Royal does? Play the flute for his aunt? That's a pretty big snake coming out of that hamper. That's a fake. That ain't spaghetti, son. Probably harmless black snakes. Um, look, Susie, why don't you and me go to dinner after the show? I can't afford it. And besides, I've got to talk business to Royal. Do you just talk to him or do you hiss at him in Morris' coat? A job is a job, Ambrose. If Tanagra takes my job, I'll take hers. She's taking a powder on Royal? She can't have her snake and beat it, too. Briefly from our story, Susie of the Sawdust, starring Marjorie Reynolds as Susie to bring you an important message from your government. If flying's in your blood, young man, this is for you. And if you want an exciting career that pays well, this is also for you. By this, I mean the U.S. Air Force Aviation Cadets. Uncle Sam is now training more Air Force Cadet Pilots than ever. And that means if you're qualified, a great career is open to you. If accepted, you'll receive one of the finest aviation trainings in the world. Upon successful completion, in one year's time, you'll win those coveted pilot's wings. And you'll be commissioned an officer in the U.S. Air Force Reserve. Your pay will range up to $336 a month. And here's a special point. If you're an outstanding cadet, you have a very good chance of receiving a commission in the regular Air Force. Yes, men, as an Air Force pilot, you'll be one of America's outstanding citizens. Ask at your nearest Air Force base or recruiting station about the qualifications for cadet pilot training. Let's do it now. The curtain rises on the final act of Suzy of the Sawdust, starring Margie Reynolds as Suzy. The circus came to town, and with it came glamorous but heightened Princess Tanagra, the snake charmer who complicated Suzy Drake's life by imperiling Suzy's secretarial job with her beloved boss, Bill Gerard. Royal, Tanagra's nephew would welcome her leaving the show so that he could have Suzy in the act with him. He's invited Suzy to see the show tonight. Object, business, strictly business. Well, Suzy, how'd you like our act out there? Well, you know that third Cobra from the left with the snake hips? Terrific. I thought you had more to do, though. Listen, Suzy, in six months I'll have a piece of every side showing a lot. Five years and I'll own the whole circus. But we've got to start small, you and me. With those there snakes? Me? They don't fight? No. They live, drink milkshakes? This is a trade secret. Every snake we worked with has had his poison fangs removed. No teeth? Of course not. Oh, they grow back again in a few months, but then we just haven't removed again. Well, how long since Joe Squirm and his friends have had their dental work done? Three weeks ago, they're safe. And I'm going to let you pick one of them up. Oh, no. Why not? Oh, I'm a nice girl. I don't pick up strange reptiles. Nonsense. Besides, I hear they bruise easy. They open the hamper. Do not tamper with the hamper. So? So long. I'll play him a flute and as soon as one comes out, just grab him behind the hood. Here goes. No, no. Oh, go ahead. You want Tanagra's job, don't you? She's taking your job. Besides, this is fun. Let's go now, huh? Good girl. Here's Snaky, Snaky, Snaky, Snaky. Oh dear, here comes one out of the basket. Here's Snaky. Oh, um, got a saucer of milk for you. That big fella's Rangoon. He's the dean of our staff. Oh, what a kisser on that, Hisser. Keep it up, Susie. Keep it going. Nice Rangoon. Good old fellow. Come, let Susie scratch your ears for you. Nice, nay. Now, Royal. Nice Rangoon. Gotcha. What do I do now? What do I do now? What do I do with him? Put him back. Put him back in the hamper. Don't just drop him. Push him away from him. Oh, beat it, Snake. Oh, that's it. Now, now. And that's all there is to it. Now, was that so difficult? Well, come to think of it, no. Let's do it once more. Oh, no, no, thanks. You get them used to being picked up and then they always want to be picked up. Spiles them. Well, frankly, I have bigger plans for you. Oh, you're going to play a clarinet instead of a flute so I can handle a boa constrictor. Oh, thanks, John. No, no, no, Susie. Let's forget the snake-act for a while. I want you to look at what I have in this case. There. Knives. 18 perfectly balanced steel throwing knives. Well, what did you have to do to get them? Well, you see that board there with a human figure outlined on it? Yes. So? That's my target. You mean you throw knives? That's my eye. And you want to cut me on that, too? Cut me in. What am I saying? Susie, you've a beautiful figure. Let's keep it that way. An audience would be all for you. And all we need is new blood in the act. What happened to all the old blood? Are you afraid? Afraid. You amuse me. Old Tanagra stealing your job. Have you the courage to take hers? Not only my job, my dream man. You see? And I never miss. What I want to know is, do you ever hit? Never. Let's try it. You go over and stand against the board. Goodie, goodie, gun pop. Go ahead. That's it. Now turn around. Now I lay me down to sleep. Now stand still. Don't move. Smile. Steady now. And a one. And a two. And a three. Good shot. That went right between your right arm and your body. Steady now. And a one. And a two. And a three. Oh, you got me. I'm here. Oh, you are. Oh, I am. My ear. Where's my ear? Help, plastic surgeon, plasma, bursate, help. You're perfectly all right. Well, then what happened to my ear? Where's my left ear? It's under your hair, not on top of it. What? Oh. The handle just touched your ear in passing. That's all. Oh. After all, it's harder on a live target. It was hard on me, all right. Why I... What do you mean, harder on a live target? Especially the first time. Do you mean to say that this is the first time you've ever thrown a knife at a live person? Did fine, too, didn't I? You could have killed me. The odds were against it. That's murder. Man slaughter. I looked it up before I tried it. Well, that's what I mean by being business-like about my profession. Could I have a look at one of those knives, sunny boy? Sure. Best you can buy. Here. You now have two shoulder blades, right? Yes, yes. That's normal. Would you like to try for three? What do you mean? Start running, Royal. And if I can put this knife between your shoulder blades... Susie. Start running, sunny boy. Start running. Susie. Susie. Anyone in the office? Mr. Gerard. Bill. Boss. Susie. Fine thing. 12.15 and no one in the office. Oh, there's a note on Susie's desk. Dear Mr. Gerard. The three-minute noon, as per your instructions, have gone out to lunch. Susie. Hm? William Gerard, Inc. advertising. Are you the office boy? I am Ambrose Greps, office manager. Uh, third assistant. This is Princess Tanagra. Bewitched. Do me a big favor. Bring that empty suitcase behind the spare desk down to the side show in a taxi, will you? I need it right away. I'm sorry, Princess. I'm all booked up. She thinks she is that phony princess. Empty suitcase. Doesn't feel empty. Yeah, but it was empty when Tanagra brought it in. I didn't put nothing in it. And Mr. Gerard ain't leaving, and besides, he has his own luggage. Who could? Susie. Oh, no, she don't. She ain't running off with that character royal. She's not joining any circus. I'll fix that. Who do they think they are? They're snakes. Oh, snakes. Cobra. Help. Never. Hey, boss, look out. Oh, Ambrose, for Pete's sake, what are you doing up on that filing cabinet? Boss, don't move. Look at the floor. Huh? Oh! Get the police. Get the fire department. Get somebody. No, no, don't get excited. Let's get to work now. Get to work. Mr. Gerard, don't go to your desk. You'll cut yourself off from the door like happened to me. It's a snake. I know. I know now. Let's get some work done. Cobra. A genuine King Cobra. Yeah, yeah, it's a real beaut this time. This time? The biggest snake I've seen since the old bootleg days. Boss, I'm telling you. I never had the morning after so bad that other people saw them, too. Must be getting old. Oh, well. Get up on your desk. He's coming for you. Cobra. Great snakes. This isn't a hangover. Can't you make a few telephone calls while you're up on your desk? Yeah, yeah, sure. Hello, operator. Give me a snake. I mean, connect me with a Cobra. Operator. Hello, boss. Thanks, Susie. Look out. Well, for goodness' sake. Snake. Cobra. Oh, that. It's a Cobra. Yeah, I know. That's Rangoon. It's deadly poison. Susie, you back out and get the police. I'll go looking for a cane. Won't you, Ambrose? No. You're fired. Oh, don't get worked up, boys. I'll handle a situation. Now, all you do is walk up to the friendly little fellows. Susie darling, don't. I beg of you. Susie, what did you say? I don't want to be a widow or before I'm a groom, that's all. Bill. All right, now get away from that animated rope. Oh, William, dear. For you. Anything. No, no. Don't spy on me. Here, Snakey. Oh, there's a good fellow. No. Stop it. I can't. There, now, Snakey. So there, so I grab him. The end of the suitcase. I came for that suitcase of mine I just telephoned about. Jerusalem. What's wrong? You tell me what's wrong. Why is everybody pale green? Oh, the snake got out. That's all. What are you doing with that suitcase? You mean baby? Baby got out? Luckily, I remembered some of my childhood snake lore. That along with a smattering of Hindustani, which I happened to possess. What I want to know is, was anybody bitten? Oh, dear, no. That's a relief. You might have all been dead in five minutes. Huh? I was going to take Baby to the vet to have her poison fangs removed, but he kept stalling me off. You mean that isn't Rangoon? No, this is Baby. Baby has teeth? It ain't bridge work, dearie. Why? Oh, nothing. Nothing. Susie! Susie! Are you all right now, Susie? Oh, where's Tanagra? I sent her packing with her king-size fishworm, darling. I'm all right. What did you say? I said, darling. Oh, better send for Tanagra to come back. Why? Well, you're going to need a secretary, aren't you? I'll be busy with the house and babies. The curtain falls in the final act of Susie of the Saga. Our star Marjorie Reynolds will return for a curtain call after this timely message from Wendell Niles. Man, here's an outfit that's known and respected throughout the world. Yes, just about everybody has heard of the constabulary of the U.S. Army. Now, you young men have the opportunity to join this colorful outfit during occupation duty in Germany. If qualified, you can enlist in the Army for direct assignment to these yellow scarf troopers. And here's another great opportunity. The Army's famous first division is also looking for top-flight men. The first every vet has distinguished the constabulary is also carrying out interesting occupation tasks in Europe. So there you have it, men. Your chance to make your career in either one of two honored Army units. The constabulary and the first division. You'll be doing some of the most interesting work open to a young man today. Ask at your local recruiting station right away all about this new enlistment opportunity. Now back at the microphone, our star Marjorie Reynolds and our producer. Well, Marjorie, it's good to see you back again in Hollywood after you're long, and I understand quite successful tour in England. It's good to be back, CP. Let's see. You were over there in... Oh, in a stage play, burlesque. The British edition of the Broadway hit. You were away more than six months, weren't you? Yes, it was a long tour. I guess we covered most of England. Manchester brightened among the cities and finished up in London. At the Garrick or the Princess? Both of the theaters, CP. How are the audiences? Oh, really very good. Everywhere. And their reactions are all very enthusiastic. You know, Marjorie, I fully expected you to return with an accent very British, Oxfordian. Well, that's just the point. When I started thinking about accent before I went over, I was concerned. And then I realized that our Hollywood English, you know, like Clark Gable, Robert Taylor, Robert Montgomery, George Murphy speak, well, it's really international. And if I used ordinary colloquial speaking rather than, say, some of our regional accents, then I shouldn't have any trouble. And you were received there the same as our audiences, except any of the better British actors here. No trouble at all. The only trouble I had was with their slanting stages. Oh, the rake. That's some of their customary engineering. They think the slanting stage gives the audience a better view. Well, you should have seen my first dance. I accented to Leeward like an automobile with a sprung frame, but managed to keep out of the footlights and the audiences' lap. And now you can laugh about it, but it was serious then. I'll bet your ad-lib ability was improved, too. How was it? And you should have been watching one scene. I was to make a brilliant exit through the doorway, and the doorknob fell off in my hand. Yes, I learned ad-lib, but I loved it. And I want to go back over there again. Before you do, be sure to come back for another visit here with us, will you? Oh, thank you, I will. Now, who's playing next week, CP? Well, next week, Marjorie and ladies and gentlemen, we present a period play, Paul Revere wrote A White Horse. It seems that the silversmith, Revere, has an assistant who departs from the alloy formula for sterling by adding elements of romance. Richard May portrays the handsome Revere assistant. Grand. I'll be listening. Goodbye. Goodbye, Marjorie. We should have joined us next week, ladies and gentlemen, when we present Richard May in Paul Revere wrote A White Horse. Until then, this is CP McGregor saying thanks for listening and cheerio from Hollywood. Gregory Reynolds appears with the courtesy of the Hollywood morning of the media with the arrangements for the appearance of all stars on this program. Script was by Milton Geiger, a music under the direction of Eddie Skravanik. This program was transcribed in Hollywood for release at this time. Wendell Niles speaking.