 Ladies and gentlemen, Dennis Day. Dennis Day is brought to you by Palm Olive Soap and Luster Cream Shampoo. Palm Olive Soap, your beauty hope. Luster Cream Shampoo for soft, glamorous, dream girl hair. The Dennis Day show with B. Benadera, Dink Trout, George Dooning in the orchestra, and yours truly, Vern Smith, is written by Frank Galen and stars our popular young singer in A Day in the Life of Dennis Day. Here's Dennis to sing, Hair of Gold, Eyes of Blue. I came down from Butte, Montana for a little change of scene and a pay where I met a pretty queen. Oh, hair of gold, eyes of blue, lips like cherry wine. The prettiest gal I ever knew and I'm gonna make her mine. And to leave on Monday, but she held me kinda tight so I held the ground and hung around and I left on Friday night. Oh, hair of gold, eyes of blue, lips like cherry wine. The prettiest gal I ever knew and I'm gonna make her mine. I was kind of blue and lonely, so I took my horse and packed and on Sunday morning was up and gone, heading south and riding back. Oh, hair of gold, eyes of blue, lips like cherry wine. The prettiest gal I ever knew and I'm gonna make her mine. Hair of gold, eyes of blue, lips like cherry wine. The prettiest gal I ever knew and I'm gonna... Ladies, what's your complexion problem? My skin's so dingy, mine's oily. My skin's dull, course-looking. For a lovelier complexion, you must stop improper cleansing. Instead, use palm-olive soap the way doctors advise. Leading skin specialists have now proved the palm-olive plan using nothing but palm-olive soap can bring fresher, brighter complexions. Yes, regardless of age, type of skin, or previous beauty care. Now, here's what these doctors advise. Wash your face with palm-olive soap. Massaging for one minute with palm-olive soap, lovely leather. This cleansing massage brings your skin palm-olive soap full, beautifying effect. Do this three times a day for 14 days. It's that simple. But remember, 36 doctors, leading skin specialists, advise this way for 1,285 women with all types of skin. Dry, oily, normal, young, older, and prove this plan using palm-olive alone, nothing else really works for two out of three. So, for a lovelier complexion, forget all other beauty care. Instead, do as these doctors advise. Use palm-olive for a fresher, brighter complexion. For loveliness all over, use big, frizzy bath sides palm-olive in your tub or shower. Our young hero, Dennis Day, is a lad who learned in his early boyhood to smile in the face of adversity. And judging from the life he's led, he's been smiling constantly ever since. But even he doesn't seem able to muster up a smile tonight. For you see, his girlfriend, Notre, has gone to visit her grandmother for a week, and our young hero is taking her absence mighty hard. We find him now pouring out his woes into the most sympathetic little ear in the Anderson household. Gee, I don't know what to do with myself. Seems like she's been gone two months instead of two days. Now, now, buck up, my boy. And we're going to have some fun tonight. I'm taking you to our club smoker. Oh, thanks a lot, Mr. Anderson, but I don't smoke. Do you might when you see Tassel's Latour, the red-headed ball of fire? Huh? She's a bubble dancer. A bubble dancer? Sure. You know, girl who dances with a bubble. Can't you get a dollar? Of course she can. But there's some men who'd rather watch her dance with a bubble. Gee, well, I guess it takes all kinds to make a world. Yeah. And not that Tassel's is going to do her bubble dance at our club dinner, of course. We just hired her to sing a few songs because she's the only professional entertainer we could get. But is she something to look at all? My quivering soul and body. Well, gosh, how does Mrs. Anderson feel about letting you go to a club smoking when there's a woman like that present? Oh, it makes no difference to cook this. She wouldn't let me go whether Tassel's was there or not. But I thought you just invited me. Well, sure. You see, you're part of my alibi. I am? Yes. I told Cook you that you and I were going over to John Campbell's tonight to see the pictures he took on his fishing trip. Yeah? And John handed his wife the same story that he was coming over here. Boy, you got quite a head on those little shoulders. Ah, sure. You're absolutely safe as long as Pupsy doesn't get together with Mrs. Campbell. Yes, and that's hardly likely. I hate to lie to Pupsy, but, well, gee, a fella's got to enjoy himself once in a while. My home's the happiest in the whole world, but, you know what, I do get a little well, uh. Start crazy? Certainly not. You don't imagine I think that my home is a prison building. Well, that's thought has never happened. Yes, Gordon. I mean, yes, Pupsy. What's the Campbell's phone number? The Campbell's number? Why? What do you want that for, passion girl? Well, since you and Dennis are going over there tonight, I thought I'd ask Mrs. Campbell to come over here. Oh, no, no, that's, I mean, well, they haven't got a phone, Pupsy. They have the dinner. You know, the telephone company took it out, Mrs. Anderson. Took it out? What for? Unnecessary jiggling. Oh, it's the truth, Mrs. Anderson. I happened to call up Mr. Campbell about an hour after their phone was removed, and he told me all about it. He said that. Dennis. Yeah, I see the hole in it now. There's one just like it in your head. Now, step aside. Operator, I want Mrs. J.H. Campbell on Wilkin Boulevard, please. Oh, I'm dead. What did you say? He said she's dead. Who's dead? Oh, Mrs. Campbell. They're holding the wait tonight for men only. Character on the streets this afternoon. Did she wait? Oh. See? Mrs. Anderson. Oh, she'll be back in an hour. No, don't bother. I'll call her then. Goodbye. So Mrs. Campbell is dead, is she? Oh, I made a mistake. I'll make them now and then. Well, you'll never top the one your mother and father made. Well, at least you got a little recreative, Mr. Anderson. Oh, but what good is it? In an hour, she'll talk to Mrs. Campbell and then. I remember once before she taught me in alive. She bowed me out for two days solid. You must have been awful. Yeah, of course. I was only able to hear her the second day. Jane, what are we going to do? Dennis, I have it. Well, enjoy it. You have much time left. I mean, I have an idea. Listen, if we could get some woman to call up Pooksy and say that she's Mrs. Campbell, all our troubles would be over. We'd have her tell Pooksy that she was busy. Yeah, then neither of them would ever know the truth. And I know just who we can get to do it to. That's Spencer around the corner who has such a crush on you, Miss Baker. But we asked her, Dennis. Gosh, I'm scared to go near that woman. Why? You can handle her? She always handles me and I'm ticklish. Nonsense. She's old enough to be your mother. Sure, and she looks like my father, but that doesn't stop her. Oh, well, I'll do it for you, Mr. Anderson. Oh, you darling little bundle of old fuel. What brings you here all of a sudden, and who cares? Honest, Baker. Don't stand out there in the cold, dark street, dear boy. Come into my warm, dark living room. Sit down, you're gorgeous in here. You're on the couch beside me. Well, OK, but you sit down first. No, you first. Oh, no, last time I sat down first, you quick as a flash, you were under me and I was sitting on your lap. Yes, I know. And let's see if I've lost any speed, huh? Oh, gee whiz, you're getting so embarrassed. Oh, you goose, you whiz. And tell me, does that little girlfriend of yours, Mildred Anderson, know you will? Oh, no, ma'am, she's out of town. Uh-huh, when the cat's away, the mouse will play. Well, I want you to think of me as something any little mouse would just adore. I always have. Oh, thank you. Now, what seems to be on your mind? I guess I've made mine for you, obviously. Well, Mr. Anderson and I are in trouble, Miss Baker. You see, we told Mrs. Anderson we were going over to the Campbell tonight, but actually we were going to the club smoker. Why, you don't. Well, anyway, we just wanted to call Mrs. Anderson and say you're Mrs. Campbell, and then tell her you can't be with her tonight. Would you? Well, if I do this to you, then what will you do for me? I knew you were going to ask me that question and I want you to know I'm totally unprepared for it. Would you take me out on a date sometime? It's a deal. Oh, you dreamed, are you? Oh, I'm going to. Now, you're sure you know what to do? Yes. I called Mrs. Anderson, say I'm Mrs. Campbell, and that my husband, oh, Mrs. Baker, what's the matter? Just saying I had one made me all goose-template. Please, we have to hurry. Well, all right. I'm going to see what you do to me. The blood is just racing through every inch of my body. Oh, it's probably just trying to get the trip over with. Oh, Mrs. Baker, go to work. We'll continue our day and the life of Dennis Day in just a moment. Meanwhile, here's Dennis to sing, I'm sorry, but I'm glad. Sorry, but I'm glad you're low, because if you weren't, you really wouldn't care. I'm so glad you haven't any peace of mind or another heart to share. Sorry, but I'm glad you're crying because you're dream, but if it makes you feel a little better. Well, Mr. Anderson's story to his wife that he was visiting Mr. Campbell's house tonight seems to have been a highly successful fabrication, thanks to a phone call from Dennis' friend, Mrs. Baker. We find him now with Dennis and Mr. Campbell at the club smoker, which seems to be in full swing. So the farmer looks at this brother and he says, no, by cracky, not till the place of corn goes up. That's the best I've heard all night. Dennis, didn't you like that story? Oh, sure. When I figured it out, were you here laughing? You had to bring him, I suppose, Anderson. Well, he's a good boy. Besides, it makes my wife less suspicious. Yeah. We sure fooled him with that story of being at each other's house, didn't we? Ah! We sure did. Hey, you know, sometimes I think women are pretty stupid. Oh, sure. No question about it. Men are much smarter than women on the average. Not till the price of corn goes up. Of course, now and then you run across a case that drives the average way down. Hey, look who's coming over to our table. Wow, Tassel Latour. Must have heard me whistling at her while she was there. Having a good time? You bet, Miss Latour. I'll say. Oh, yes, ma'am. Your singing was just wonderful. You wouldn't kid a young girl, would you? Oh, no, ma'am. Or you either. Hey, no attention to him, Miss Latour. He isn't half like us. Yeah. Hey, you're Jay H. Camelobanker, aren't you? That's me. Nobody draws interest like I do. Ah! I had you spotted. Mind if I sit down? Park it right on my lap, lady. I love my wife, but oh, you kid. Gee, how smooth can you get? There we are, baby. Comfy. Perfect. OK, Dave, snap it. Right, hold it. Perfect shot. Thank you. Hey, did that fire? Oh, sure thing, Cuddles. My press agent needed a shot of me sitting on the town's most prominent lap. Well, publicity, huh? Publicity? Why, you, you, you. Oh, see you tomorrow morning on the front page, Jay H. So long. Oh, no. No. Dave, that's a good one on you, Camelobanker. All she wanted on your lap was a picture. Oh, yeah? Have you forgotten you were sitting right next to me? Well, your wife's there when she sees me. Oh, my sacred Aunt Sally's polka dot animal castle. What are we going to do? My wife will leave me. Mine will leave me lying there. Think of something for heaven's sake. Yeah, anything. Well, we told Mrs. Anderson we were going to look at pictures of Mr. Campbell's fishing trip. Let's tell her that this was just one of the pictures he took on the trip. On a fishing trip? How do they explain Tassel's Latour? Live bait? Wait a minute. By George, I think I've got it. That photographer is a Newspaper man, right? Well? And a Newspaper man can't resist a story, right? Well, what of it? Well, in five minutes, there's going to be the biggest fight in the riot in history right across the street in Clancy's Tavern. Oh, boy, can we see it? You're going to be in it. What? Don't you get it? We go over and take a fight with a couple of guys. John stays here, and in five minutes, he starts yelling, riot, murder, big fight across the street. Yeah? Sure. The photographer runs over to take pictures, and we grab his camera and smash it into an unrecognizable pulp. By that time, we'll be kind of hard to identify ourselves. It's our only chance. Don't you see, they? Come on, Dennis. Now, remember John, five minutes. Oh, boy, all the trouble I'm getting into over this thing. I might just as well be in the same position as you fellas. Don't be silly, Dennis. Tomorrow, you will be single, but our trouble never stops. You see anybody we could pick a fight with? Hey, how about those two over there? Where? In the corner, see? One of them's putting on her lipstick. Don't be silly. This has to be a real struggle. Yeah, I guess they do outweigh us. Hey, look. Those two big Marines over there. Now, that's more like it. They look like murderers. Are we in luck? Yeah, someday, everything goes just right. Oh, they're perfect. And, you know, if one fights, they're both fights. Men in uniform always stick together. Yeah, but couldn't we wait for a couple of Western Union boys? Oh, no, this is it, then. Now go ahead. I'll be right behind you. Gosh, I don't know how a fight starts. I've always been single. Well, here goes. Good evening, sir. Good evening. Oh, yeah, you and who else? Yes, that's all. Oh, mister. Come outside and call me that. What are you talking about anyway? Put your hands in front of your face and keep them there, pal. I'm going to hit you right in the stomach. What is it? Come on, fight. I don't want to fight. I thought so, Marines. See going bellhop. What a crummy branch of the server. I've been trying to transmit to the Navy for years. The Army and the Navy got it all over us, Marines. Oh, yeah? Well, I think the Marines are the best outfit in the world. And I'll lick anybody who says they aren't. Well, now you mention it, I have met some pretty nice ones. Hey, keep off my side, will you? Look, uh, getting kind of late, Sonny. I'm due back at the base. See you, huh? Hey, wait, please. Couldn't you throw a chair out or slug us with a bottle or something? Couldn't you, huh? Couldn't you, huh? Look, kid, take a kit. Hereafter, lay off the torpedo juice and it'll shrink your brain. Even yours. Come on. Gee, I'm sorry, Mr. Anderson. Well, it wasn't your fault, Dennis. Well, it's all over now. Yeah, it looks like that picture will be in the paper tomorrow, all right? Yes. And when poopsie sees it. There's a point, as I could hold you. What a mess. Guns, knives, nice furniture, but look, it's, it's, it's murder. Yeah, yours and mine, first thing in the morning. Good morning, Dennis. Good morning, Mr. Anderson. Well, has she, has she seen it yet? No, but she'll be down any minute. And then our marriage will be over forever. And it was such a beautiful relationship, Dennis. We were Tristan and a soulie, Romeo and Juliet, all over again. Yeah, when you weren't Louis and Walcott. Well, we had our little differences, but we always patched them up until this. This is the end. If we could only keep her from seeing the paper. It's no use. She'll ask for it first thing. She always does. Yeah, but maybe we could tell her that, shh, I hear her coming. Good morning, Herbert. Dennis. Good morning, Mrs. Anderson. Good morning, my dear kind wife who is merciful and sweet and kind and smiles no matter what happens when it snows around. What's this nonsense now? Have you the morning paper, Herbert? Oh, there is no morning paper this morning, Mrs. Anderson. No morning paper? Why not? A big paper shortage sprang up last night. Well, what could cause such a sudden paper shortage? Too many people rubbing instead of blotting. It's funny. Now let's have the paper. You wouldn't want to see it, dear. Yeah, the news is awful. Oh, there was a big flood down south, a terrible flood. Florida is now located off Boston. We just couldn't stand the news, Pupsy. Hurricane kills millions on West Coast. Fire destroys Canada. Earthquake levels are whole far east. Little lab in a flood dog patch which moves. Now you can stop this silliness right now. I want that paper. But Pupsy. It's no use, Mr. Anderson. We've lied enough. Time now to tell the truth. What? Mrs. Anderson lies in trickery and deceit are far into my nature when I see they won't work. Your husband wasn't at the Campbell's last night. He was at the club smoker. The club smoker? Yes, the picture in the paper tells all. In the paper? Give it to me. Now, dear. Yes, sir. Yes, sir. Fine. The only picture here is of someone named Dave Collins, Tassel, a tourist press agent. It says his taxi was in an accident late last night, and all his camera equipment and pictures were destroyed. What? What? You mean if this fool had opened his mouth, you never would have known? Oh, no. Herbert Anderson. You have to wait for your turn. Dennis, Dave. Wait. No, Mr. Anderson, please. This isn't like you. Wait, you're not your daughter or your wife, you know. You, I can lick. Wait, stand back. Help, don't do that. Dennis Day will be back in just one minute to sing in the still of the night. But first, dream girl, dream girl, beautiful luster cream girl. 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