 Alright, good morning. Once again, good morning everyone who's just joined in. Welcome once again. Maybe let's bow our heads and start with a word of prayer. Heavenly Father, we are so thankful to You, Lord, for bringing each one of us here. Thank You, Lord, for the eager hearts that You have bought this morning. Lord, we look to You for Your Word, for an institution, Lord, that You designed. Lord, we pray that You will open our minds, our hearts, You will illuminate it with Your Spirit and, Lord, with the power of the Holy Spirit, give us the ability to change things, Lord, in us, in our relationships, in our marriages. Thank You because You desire us, Lord, to be unblemished, Father. And we pray that in this journey that You will empower us greatly. Thank You, Lord. I pray for each one of us here, Lord, that You will minister to them. You will be with each one of us listening and interacting. Father, that Your Word, Lord, will stay in our hearts and make us alive. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen. All right. Would somebody like to have a quick recap of what we did in the last class? Anybody? Anyone can just unmute themselves and brief, maybe one or two of you, a quick recap about what we worked on the last time. I generally don't like calling out names. I like when people take that initiative. So I leave it to you. Anybody? Maybe one man and one woman. We looked at... Yes, sir. Sorry, Sam. Oh, Sam. Sorry. Sorry, Sam. Go ahead. I remember talking about spending some time on the origin of marriage and how it was instituted by God and it was God's idea. Right. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you, Sam. Thank you. Okay. Anybody would like to take off from what Sam left up with? So he said it was God who designed it. We were looking at, you know, God who brings man and woman together. So what were some of the biblical perspectives that we looked at last week? Maybe two or three points you could bring out. Anybody else? Marriage is sacred. Sorry, Kennedy. I didn't follow that. Marriage... Marriage is something sacred. Marriage is something sacred. It's holy. Okay. Rupa, you had unmuted yourself. Would you like to... Yes, Rupa. Marriage, we discussed that marriage is a good thing and it is finding favor with God and also it's an institution which we have to honor and we also talked about purity in marriage. Okay. Great. Thank you. Wonderful. So yeah, some of the pointers just to reiterate what Kennedy and Rupa said. We said that marriage is a good thing. We spoke about how marriage is a solemn covenant. We discussed how it is an institution to be honored as Rupa said. It is between one man and one woman. It's something that's bought together by God. It is a union of two people and it is a union of a man and a woman, sorry. And it is a journey till death do you part, right? So that's what we looked into the last week. This week is a very interesting one and I really enjoyed this topic, especially when we do counseling, premarital counseling. And so this is a question that I want to bring out to all the married people in this group. So before you got married, what kind of preparation did you follow or what did you do? Did you prepare to yourself personally? Or did you attend maybe a meeting or a seminar or something instituted by your church? What kind of a preparation did you do, right? So it'd be interesting to hear. Maybe people who haven't answered, I'd love to hear from you all too. Yes? Good morning, ma'am. Good morning, Apni. So to be honest, that is something that now when I'm studying about marriage and counseling, I really wonder that we actually were never counseled or it was never taken that way that we actually needed any kind of counseling. Only thing is what we've observed in the families, what we had learned from being in the families. That was the only kind of training we had. And so no one ever sat down and even gave us anything to be prepared about it. So since we were away, we were not even born again. We were not even believers at that time. So the things that we are learning now are actually amazing. And it's something very shocking as well as giving us the perspective to prepare our children for that now. But not really, ma'am. We didn't learn anything. There was nothing that was being given to us. Absolutely. Thank you, Apni. In fact, I was looking for an answer. I was waiting for an answer like that because even I know in the time that I got married, probably because of the education I was in, maybe I had a little bit more of awareness and knew that I had to plan and prepare for certain things. But it's only as we started working through this today. I said there's so much more than what I thought was necessary. Anyone else? How anyone else has a different experience of how you have prepared for marriage? Anybody else? Ma'am, can I add one sentence? Yes, Amni. Yes. Completing 25 years seems to be a miracle for me. Okay. Yes. Anyone else? How did you prepare for marriage? Or maybe you were just pushed into marriage. I don't know if there were some of us who, parents felt that was the right time, the right thing to do and just found somebody. And sometimes that happens in the culture that we live in. So was that, was that something that people have gone through? Maybe one more response by somebody? Ma'am, should I? Yes. Yes. Kennedy. Was that Kennedy? Yeah, Kennedy. Yes, Kennedy. Mine was full of blanders, so they were to go. Because we did the opposite. We cohabited first, instead of then later we went to see our parents. Okay. Then they went to the church meetings. Then they had the discussion with our counselors. Okay. Then they went to the church meetings, planned for the wedding. Okay. Okay. All right. Thank you. Thank you, Kennedy. Thank you so much for being honest and open. Thank you. Someone else? I'm sorry, I think I missed who that was. There was a lady who was speaking. Ma'am, it was me. Rupa. Yeah. Yes, Rupa. Go on, go on. I was waiting on the Lord before getting married and waiting for the person, God, ordained by God for me. I never mentioned I want this kind of person or that kind of person. But three things I asked of the Lord. I think that prayer also God has given me because I asked him for someone who is born again, who knows the Lord. And secondly, I wanted someone who will not ask me dowry. And third thing, I wanted someone in India, some of the people. They have two certificates in the corporate world or in the government. They have a certificate saying that Hindus and inside the church, they follow the faith. And when I was very young, I had a friend who had that kind of father who worked in the government and they had an Ambedkar photo in their house. And they used to come to the church also. That made me think and I was not happy with what was happening. Then I took a decision in that small age that whomever I'm going to marry should be able to proclaim that he belongs to God, not only in the church but also in the society. So that was the three pointers I asked God. And I had to stand in faith for some time because my father was also not very happy. He said, who will marry you without dowry and all that. But God has honored and he gave me a person with that commitment. And but learning, preparing for the marriage, to be honest, I have learned. I'm still learning. It's a journey. Thank you, ma'am. Thank you. Thank you, Rupa. Thank you so much. Okay, wonderful. And I'm sure, you know, as we go on in this lesson, you'll probably find certain things maybe that you did, maybe you didn't. But I want to encourage you, even as we go through this portion of preparing for marriage and making a choice, you know, it's still not too late to change yourself. Yes, you do not, you do not change your spouse. That's not it. It's you change yourself. It's working on certain things that may not even have occurred to you as being important to deal with within marriage. So for those of you who are married, you know, I think it's a great opportunity to learn about how things can be different. And for those of you who aren't married, I think this is something that's wonderful for you to keep yourself prepared before you enter into this institution. Okay, so when, like we had discussed the last time, we said that marriage is a coming together of two people. And so when these two people come together, what you're saying is when two people come together, there are two different personalities who are coming together, two different experiences, two different individuals, their upbringing, their expectations, their dreams, and even the way that they have journeyed with God, right? So these the union of these two people can either be, you know, something that's beautiful or something that can be like like being in a boxing ring, right? It can be wonderful. It can work together so well, or it can be combative, like two armies together, right? But if these two individuals who are coming into marriage can be more prepared, can be more equipped, they are ensuring that coming together is going to definitely produce something that is beautiful, okay? And because that's what the scripture really talks about, you know, two are better than one. So when two come together, knowing that God has made each person differently, and we need to work together in order to make a good outcome or a good synergy. Now, we need to, I think first of all, understand that there may be very many reasons that we enter into marriage, and a lot of them may be wrong reasons, right? It could be especially maybe in the Indian culture, a lot of times people get into marriage because they are being forced by their family, or that they are pushed to, you know, get into the next phase of their life. So it's maybe an expectation that they are just hoping to fulfill, or it can be, you know, you need probably someone to take care of your elderly parents, or it could be just, you know, wanting to leave your own parental home and starting something else, or it can be other reasons like, you know, wanting to gratify your sexual needs. The very reason for why people get married is something that needs to be thought of, because that in itself can set a marriage, you know, the outcome of the marriage. So being in it for the right reasons, for the reasons that God had ordained, like we spoke about last week, you know, for those reasons is when you can expect that a marriage is in it for the best, okay? Now when we look at, you know, the Bible, we do also find certain Jewish traditions of how marriage is takes place. So, you know, so if you've read a little bit about how Jewish marriage is takes place, it gives you a good analogy of the way, you know, the union between Christ and the churches, and that is the similar custom that is being played out even in a marriage. So in the Jewish marriage, after, you know, the engagement or, you know, the families come together and arrange the marriage and decide that there will be an engagement or a betrothal, there is generally a year-long period of wait, okay? And during this wait, they are expected to the bride, to be bride and to be groom, are expected to prepare themselves. So what does a bride do? The bride prepares herself for the groom, so she keeps her chastity, she keeps her purity and her devotion to her groom, right? So that one year, it's a period of testing also. And for the groom, the preparation is that he goes and prepares a place, makes the place, the place and becomes responsible to bring about his bride to, you know, to his home. So although when we're looking at this, remember, we're not advocating that we need to follow this traditional custom, but we understand the depth of the value of it is that, yes, we need to prepare ourselves for marriage. So in or people's church, what we do is we do ensure that young people or people who are going to get married prepare themselves and we lead them through a premarital course, where we take them through a sense of preparation, where there are discussions that happen on practical things of life, on emotional issues, on past related issues that can impact the marriage, what is expected of them. So they go through a three to six month period of intense, you know, counseling and training, so that, you know, there is a sense of being equipped as they enter into marriage. So through this, we are going to be looking at seven important areas that need to be looked into with complete understanding, with complete seriousness, as you're going to be, as you're preparing for marriage. So if you are following along in the PDF, I'm on page 13 of the PDF, right? So we're going to be looking at the two, sorry, initial three areas in our first class and in next class, we'll be looking at the rest, the rest. So one of the most important things area is to understand how we can offer the best of ourselves. So if you look at, if you look into scripture in John chapter 14 verse 2 and 3, if any of you have that PDF opened on page, I think it's page 13, would someone read that verse out? John 14, 2 and 3, becoming the best you, John 14, 2 and 3, would someone kindly read that out please? Shall I read, ma'am? Sure, go ahead. John chapter 14 verse 2 and 3 says, in my father's house are many mansions. If it were not so, I would have told you, I go to prepare a place for you and if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to myself, that where I am and there you may be also a man. Thank you. So if you look into this verse, what it's showing here is how Jesus died to bring back his bride to him and he has gone to prepare a place for his bride. So what, and as he prepares this place, he's left the Holy Spirit with us so that we can be made ready, we can be made pure and unblemished in front of him. So when what we are taking away from this passage is that sense of preparation, that sense of learning to equip ourselves or prepare ourselves to what we are supposed to be before the marriage. So then we look at, what to ask any person, what would you want for your marriage? The first thing, the first response you will get is a list of qualities that you want to see in your partner. But very often we don't think about what is needed within us to actually be the partner for the person you're looking for. And the focus is so much on having mis-right or mis-right. And while you're trying to do that, what is extremely important is to be able to look at yourself, to be able to see that what you are going to be offering in marriage is nothing can match up to that, nothing can change, nothing can substitute for that. So taking time to first of all prepare yourself, you're actually giving a wonderful gift to your spouse, to your future family and to your children. So the focus is a lot on how am I preparing myself, so becoming the best me. Because like we said, when we ask God to work within us, either through his word or by his spirit, we become more efficient and effective in everything in life and so also in marriage. So what is this becoming the best you or best me mean? So I'd like you to look at it as a wheel. Think of it as a wheel and in that wheel, you know the wheel has different spokes. So each portion of the wheel represents you and when you're looking at you as a whole, there are many parts of you. There is a physical part of you, there is the emotional part of you, the intellectual part of you, the social part of you, the spiritual part of you, the financial part of you, what else could be there? Maybe the professional part of you. So if you look at this wheel, if the wheel needs to run in a good balance, you need to have all the spokes in alignment. If there is one spoke that is functioning at 10% or is only 10%, the wheel is going to crack. So when we're looking at becoming us, we're looking holistically, we're looking completely at how we can prepare ourselves. So as an exercise, what I want to maybe encourage you all to do is to draw a wheel and in each portion, maybe label the portion of physical, social, intellectual, mental, financial, spiritual, and see at what optimum are you functioning. When you're looking at a zero to 100%, what optimum are you functioning at? Like for example, physical, maybe you probably need some bit of an exercise or for the fact that you don't sleep enough or maybe you don't eat healthy. So look at that part of you and say, what is it that needs to change? Or look at your maybe your financial self and say, how good a steward am I with the money? Am I able to save? Am I able to invest? Am I a spendthrift? Find that out. In your spiritual self, what is your walk of God with like? What time do you take with God to spend with him? How much do you learn the word? How much do you serve him? So having that, just drawing that wheel and this is what I generally make my young people do to draw that wheel and begin to see because when you actually draw it, you begin to see that there are some areas that really need some work and committing to do that. So the first area is look at yourself holistically and see how is it that you can become the best person for your partner. Any questions here? Because there's so much of silence, I just want to see if everyone's awake, everyone is here, maybe a thumbs up or a question or a smiley or a... It's a thumbs up. It's thumbs up. Okay, great. Thank you. Thank you, Charles. Thank you, Dharvan, for the smiley. All right. Okay, so we'll look into this second area. The second area is our emotional health. Now, I cannot just specify how important this part of it is. When you're looking at emotional health or... So what does emotional health mean? The emotional health is the part of your... Some part of your soul. Now, I'm sure you have learned this in your last year that man is a tripartite being, we are made of body, we are made of a soul and we're made of spirit. So when you look at the soul, the soul has the mind, it has the will and it has the... What? This is just to see if you're... Okay, the soul has the mind, the will and the emotions. Yes, yes. The soul has the mind, the will and the emotion. That's right. Okay. Now, you know, when you're looking at a person, you cannot see very much of what is in their emotions or their attitudes or their perceptions or their thoughts. Right? The only way that you know that is in their behavior or in their speech or in their mannerisms and often that is not something that can be easily seen unless and until of course you spend a little more time with people and then begin to see how do they react? How do they relate to others? What are their specific attitudes? Now, unless and until that happens, you're not very clear of how that is and scripture does show through the verses that you see on page 13, it talks of how the importance of a cheerful disposition, the importance of a cheerful heart that is good for the health of the person that is good for a community or good for relationships. So scripture really brings that about in a great way. Now, a lot of people do get married for the sake or not for the sake because they think that if they do get married, it will cure all their emotional needs and all their emotional problems. Okay? But what they don't realize is that marriage can heighten or aggravate those emotional weaknesses. Okay? And like for example, there may be there may be times emotions that we may not share our emotions with everyone. We think it's either a weakness or we think it's not a good thing to do. So we may not share those emotions and we think, you know, maybe if I get married and I have that special person in my life, maybe I'll start to talking more, I'll start to be able to relate more. But in turn, it can be very detrimental because you've never trusted anyone to be able to share those emotions. And so when you come to a point of marriage, you're not going to be able to do that either. So it is important to identify and come up and face those emotional issues that you may have and begin to deal with it. Okay? Now if you look at the notes, there are on page 14, you will see that there are 17 different kinds of unhealthy emotions or attitudes or behaviors that is very important to to be addressed. Okay? Now we are all human and we will experience one, two or even many of these emotions. And if we are in a position to confront this and work on this, our relationships are going to be much better. So I'm just going to give you 10 seconds, look into that 17 list that's given to you and maybe you can mark it or mentally tell yourself, okay, this is something I know affects my marriage or this is something that affects my general relationships and I need to work on this as I enter into marriage. So quickly, 10 seconds, you know, have a quick look at those 17 pointers that are there and give yourself a mental mark as to what is it that you really want to begin to change by the help of the Holy Spirit. 10 seconds. Okay. Now since you've done that, I think it's also important to state that these emotions that you probably found, if you were to recollect, you will see that these affect your behavior. These affect the way that you decide on things. These affect the way that you problem solve. Okay. So why is it important is is because it has a relation, our emotion impacts our behavior. And these wrong wrong behaviors can disintegrate a marriage. It can bring about further problem. We don't deal with it. Like maybe maybe I'll bring up a bring about an example. Let's say I'll take up the fourth one that says critical and someone who's being critical and judgmental. Okay. If if we see everything to through criticism through and through a very pessimistic through a very fault finding eye through a very judgmental eye, and we don't recognize that that's what it is. When we are in a close marriage or close relationship, everything that you see that does not sit well with you is bought about as a criticism. Right. So you could maybe something about the way they look or something about the way they do do things or something about the way that they are or some the way that they speak the language they use. You know, a sense of negativity that's there around. Right. Or let's say if there is jealousy, you know, you tend to become over possessive about your spouse, do not want them to talk to anybody that you want them all for yourself. You know, they shouldn't go to their to their parents house. They shouldn't meet a friend. So that affects the way that you know, affects the behavior and that definitely brings about issues within the marriage. So you know, one of the examples that scripture talks about is, you know, a nagging a nagging spouse. So if you look at Proverbs 2715, it talks of how a nagging spouse is like the drip of a leaky faucet. Right. So it's so annoying. Right. You keep hearing that, you know, I don't know if you kept hearing, you know, one drop in your bathroom that keeps going on. And it's very, very annoying. Right. And that it talks about how about emotional issues. Now it just doesn't mean just a nagging wife, you know, it can be a nagging spouse. So it can be, it can be any other behavior that can can deter the couple from coming in together. Okay. So negative emotions or a negative attitude is something that needs to be dealt with. And we will be looking at this greater as we as we move ahead in in another chapter where it talks about having about our attitudes and our temperament and our behavior. So we're going to be dwelling a little more into what can be done. Okay. So part of becoming one is recognizing these emotions and these attitudes and these behaviors and know that some of them are are not going to help you in in your marriage. Also, it is to understand the way that I may I am I react emotionally may not be the way that my spouse reacts emotionally. And the more that I'm able to understand that the more I'm able to accept certain things or the more that I'm able to understand that, you know, my spouse works certain things this way, the more that I'm able to respect that and to understand how we can work together and respond in situations. Okay. So so emotional health is is a very important part in in marriage because that's that's what you are you're actually relating to the soul of another not just bodily and not just in the spirit but also relating in the soul. Is there any question here before I move on to the third area? Any quick questions before I move on to the third area? Yes. Good morning, madam. Good morning, Abraham. Yes. So I want to know so in case you have a spouse who has this most of these things you are talking about, is it a mass that we accept them the way they are or we look for strategies on how to help them out because probably we might also need help for us to overcome this challenges on our own. So do we have to support each other to overcome or we just accept that because you are jealous, I just accept you the way you are and then I try to leave to please you? Is that something we can adjust or get better from each other? Okay, so you know there is a verse it says in the Bible where it talks about eye and sharpens eye, right? So when you are in a relationship, the way that you learn from each other is because of, you know, your love, your love, your face each other and we're living together. So I and I think it's so true that your spouse is the one who knows you the best, right? Or the people within your family are those who know you the best and if you need to grow, grow in the Lord, you need to grow as the person what resources God has given you, you need the help of somebody else. So as a spouse, if you have noticed something in your partner that definitely requires a change, I think it's important to lovingly address that and let them know that this is something that needs a dresser because we are also like mirrors, you know, we reflect things so to be able to do that is good because it is for the greater cause of your relationship, greater cause of the marriage and the family. So it is important for you to do that, whether your spouse does it or not of course is an individual response but I recommend that you know if you're in a marriage and you do find something, you know, gently, lovingly, encourage them to work on it or to get the help that they want or work on it together. So I would encourage that you help one another. Thank you, Mada. Thank you so much. Charles, you had a question. Yes. I am looking at when Jesus was talking about the speckle and logs in people's eyes that it is easier for you to see the speckle in your spouse's eye, however you have logs. Now in the beginning, when you are beginning the lecture, you said that it is not yet too late for you to change yourself because you can't change your spouse. You change yourself. Now I'm looking at the human tenderness, the human character of looking at speckles in people's eyes, in the spouse's eyes. So now, how do you equitably balance and identify now the logs that you have in yourself? Do you ask your spouse to tell you the speckles they are seeing in you, which are now your logs, and then you are able to tell them the speckles you are seeing, which are their logs. I am wondering on how to handle this, especially on these vices that we have seen that might be negative in your spouse, when you yourself are not identifying them, especially on areas where you find people are not ready to be corrected or rebuked. What do you do? Okay. So that's a very good question, Janice. So when the issue, what I think what you're saying is how do we correct someone when there is a log in my eye, when there is a speck in the other. Now when we're looking at marriage, we're looking at a situation where one learns from another, and we're looking at a union which is willing to be vulnerable to the other, so much so that I can actually show all of who I am to my husband or to my spouse, and have him correct me. Now that is the best place, the ideal place for it to be in. However, not all of those relationships are in those ideal spaces. Yet it is our responsibility to be able to one, I think okay, so maybe I'll give you an example, like let's say being short tempered. So I may be just as short tempered as my spouse is, and maybe I have noticed that earlier on, maybe in my marriage, I've been really short tempered and over time, I've worked on it and it's getting better, but probably I'm not seeing the same in my husband or my spouse. So it is important to first of all own up and say that this has been an issue with me or an emotional concern problem with me, but I've begun to see that this is the way that I've worked on it and I think it's helping me. Would you want to work in that journey, walk in that journey alongside with me, or find someone who can lead you through with that. So it is important to do that, even though you may not be perfect, when you do see something that affects your marriage, it is important to bring it out because remember YOLA 1, what your spouse does affects you, what you do affects your spouse. Yes, bring it up together and at best see how this can be worked and we're also going to be looking at conflicts and problem resolutions later, but to be able to bring it up. Like we said, if they are not willing or if they are not receptive, bring it to the Lord in prayer, bring it to God and ask that He brings about a change for His glory, for the glory that He would want to see within the marriage. Okay, I hope I answered that. I know I have two more questions. May I request that YOLA could wait for probably to the end of the class and then I can take up those questions. Christopher and Charles and I think even Samuel had lifted his hand. So I will come back to this or probably at the end of next session, we will spend a little more time for questions. The third area is on personal management. How is it that I am able to work or do things for myself to keep my life in order? So a very important part of this preparation is your personal management. So if you look at Proverbs 25-28, it says whoever has no rule over his own spirit is like a city broken down without walls. Okay, now what does this mean? Is if we do not know how to manage us ourselves and the responsibilities around us and we do not have the skills for that now, that can give rise to a lot of challenges in marriage. Like, you know, certain things are managing your time, being able to be being punctual to a place, knowing how to schedule or structure your day, balancing maybe a couple of things that there are together, work, ministry, home, how is it that you balance it? What have been your skills like your household skills? I mean, do you know how to cook? Do you know how to clean? Do you know how to make a bread sandwich? You know, are the beds needed? Is the laundry done? So all of this, it is important to personally build up in those responsibilities. And there are four key areas or pointers that we've spoken up. There are a lot more, but generally I think a lot of this can fit into these four areas. One is the career, the other is your finances. The third is your time and the fourth are your skills, skills of household skills. So when we look at career, you know, it's a good practice to check to see where is it that you, what is it that you want to do in your career? What is it that you want to do professionally? Find out to see, is there something that, do you have problems in just maintaining a job? Do you have problems in the way that you relate to people in the job? Also checking to see as to, you know, what kind of skills do you need to improve your current career or the current position that you are in? Is there something that you will need to do? Is there a necessity to change the job? Is your potential coming out in the best way possible? Because these plans will definitely affect your marriage. And it is important to discuss these things with the partner, with the spouse or your fiance so that things are well known. You know, if you do have career plans in your head and do not share it out with your spouse, with your partner, it can cause into trouble because they may be entering into marriage thinking that you're going to be staying in this high paying job all the rest of your life. But maybe in your mind you've decided that, okay, give it two years and then I'm going to move into something else or I'm going to change my career path or I'm going to be getting into full-time ministry. So it is important to open up and discuss these things. So career is one. The second that we're looking at is finances. Finances is a very important part of our marriage, right? One is, as a person, do you have a good understanding of how to manage your money? What is your thoughts about money? And practically, a lot more practically, are you able to live within the means of your marriage? Do you have a plan? Are there budgets that you have? Do you save money? Do you invest money? Are there specific goals that you have over a period of time on how much of money you would like to accumulate? Are you in debt? Is that something that has become a pattern? Also, as a person who's earning, do you have in your mind to support and contribute financially maybe to your family or to significant other people? What have your tithing practices been? What is your attitude about money when it comes in a marriage? I've seen a lot of people who come in for counseling, come in with this issue. This is my bank account, this is my money, and that is his or that is hers. And we don't touch each other and we don't even know what it is. So what are those thoughts? What are some of those principles that you have when it comes to finances? So that's something that is and needs to be discussed about. The third is, of course, time management. How do you manage your time? Are you able to keep specific schedules? Do you work on a time plan? Do you portion parts of the day for important things in your life, for your devotion and your time with God, for your work, for building up maybe certain relationships, for your health, for ministry, for building up your skills? So how do you apportion that specific time? Are you a person who is able to set goals? Do you keep commitments? Do you ensure that whatever you have said, you have committed to is something that you would do? And so these are certain goals, again, that needs to be looked into. So career, finances, and time management, and lastly, of course, the household skills. Now, it is absolute necessity in our day and time to be able to know how to manage a home or how to manage the general working of the home, especially since now both men and women do work. It is important to work hand in hand together. And it is important for both the man and the woman to build themselves in those skills. So if you are a young man or a young woman, you know, get going. Ask the help of your mom, your dad, your aunts, whoever to help you to cook, to laundry, to clean, to grocery shop, to making the bed, to whatever. There are so many things to cleaning the refrigerator. There are so many things, but get to that. And this is important to discuss because I see, again, so many couples coming with this issue that their spouse does not help them with in-household skills, in-household work or chores. And that becomes a huge sense of a conflict between them. So being able to understand and preparing yourself so that you get ready for entering into marriage really helps you maintain a stable and a happier home. Okay. Now quickly, we have, we have quickly going to get into our break, but I'll take one question. And I think it was Christopher who raised a question last time. Christopher, would you like to bring up your question? Yes. So my, I just wanted to add when it comes to, you know, emotional conflicts and emotional outbursts, I think one of the key things to be aware of is that they can be emotional triggers, you know, certain, certain areas which are sensitive on both, on both, you know, both spouses and one, you know, both husband and wife. And, you know, be aware of those. And you're also aware that those need to be managed somewhere. I mean, I'm not going into the solution part because I'm sure you'll be able to cover that much more, much better. But I'm more, I mean, I think communication is very important. And sometimes, you know, we are aware of them, but we still go, you know, we still, you know, go down the path of, you know, actually activating those emotional triggers and then that, you know, that can be, that can be quite emotional, quite stressful. Yeah. So just something I just wanted to add. Absolutely. Thank you. Thank you, Christopher. Yes. He said emotional triggers. Yes. There can be times. Maybe I'll give you one or two examples just to highlight maybe what he said, what Christopher said is, let's say there is a person who has severe anxiety and, you know, is, has been having anxiety, which has not been managed or not been dealt with, that can sometimes become a trigger for very many things or, you know, just, just, and it kind of spirals the anxiety probably becomes larger when there are certain, certain things like maybe, you know, a person who's very anxious and the spouse does not give their whereabouts when they're going on an outstation trip for maybe 10 days, that can, that can cause a sense of conflict because there is one person who seems so anxious here about the whereabouts, whereas, whereas the spouse is very, you know, says, okay, you need to trust, you need to know that when I'm out, I'll be okay. So like Christopher said, communication is very, very important to, to tide through some of these, some of these triggers. And I'd say it is good to spend more time in understanding the emotional realm of a person. You're getting just before you're getting married because that's how you, you do know. So the more the conversation takes place, the more there are exchanges, the better you're able to see what could be some emotional problems that are there, right? Okay, we'll, we'll, we'll end the, this class right now. And I'm, can you just give me a minute?