 How do you avoid carrying bagages or heartings from the previous relationship into your next relationship. Handling breakup. And today we're going to talk about this particular conversation. I am with Johnston Chuma. He is an author, a life coach, and a motivational speaker and also an artist. Karibusala Johnson. Thank you sir. Thank you so much. Tell us a bit more about what you do. Oh yeah. Johnston Chuma is my name, I am an author and I have written 11 books. I do motivational speaking, I'm a life coach, I'm a gospel artist, I'm also a farmer, a very serious farmer. You do farming? What do you plant? Is it kentiko, chicken? They used to have a maxim, they cook about chicken, I admit about trees. I have a very big tree nursery, I propagate seedlings. So you sell also? I do, I sell, and they buy. Is it a good business? It is, there is money in tree propagation. That's what I said, it's interesting farming, singing, motivational speaking. Life coaching. Jack of all trades. Oh my goodness. Thank you for coming. Thank you, I can do all things. How can we find you on social media? On Facebook, Johnston Chumwa. With KYUMWA, Instagram, it is Johnston Chumwa. Twitter, Mutunga official. Alright, thank you so much for coming, my brother, I appreciate it. Looking forward to having a conversation with you. We want to go talk about healing after a break up. What do you need to do? Remember we are coming to you live from the broadcasting house here in Nairobi, Kenya. We are also streaming live on our website www.kbc.co.ke. Y254 is where you can be able to find us, engage with us. The hashtag is power talk show at Ramaguko and Y254 channel is where you can be able to engage with us. Let us know how do you heal after a break up? What do you need to do? Are you married? What did you do to heal from your previous marriage? After divorce, what do you do? Let's engage. This is power talk and power talk starts now. Now, let me start before we get into the news degrees. I believe you said you are married. Married? To one wife. Married to one wife. Yes. That should be clear. You've been dating before. Before you got married to your current wife. I believe so. I don't know how was it for you getting into this marriage with your wife. How is it living behind everyone and everything that happened in the past. And now you want to live happily ever after with your current wife. How do you do it? It's about commitment. It's about choices. They say choices make men and women. You are defined by the choices you are making daily. And the moment you choose to go into marriage, it's a very serious commitment. Ram, life is not a game. It is a serious thing. Don't play games with your life. So once you decide I'm going into marriage, then you know the things you need to do direct. You must understand what you're going into. You must be very clear. You must have a vision. You must be God oriented. You must know how family works. And you must know how to operate as a man, as a wife, as a husband. You must know all that. You must know how to avoid dragging the things of singhuhud into a new status of being married. We were talking about those who are dating, those who are married and those who are divorced. Before you go further, you know for many they believe that you must kiss many frogs till you get married. Did you say frogs? Ya. You have that phrase? That you must kiss many frogs. You must kiss frogs. Until you get the right one. But through that process of kissing many frogs, you're getting hot. You're getting hot, ya. Stop the kissing. You should only kiss one and marry that one only. You see Ram, if you're kissing many frogs, it means you are at the swamp. Frogs are found at the swamp. So leave the swamp alone and you will meet the right person. The reason why many people kiss so many frogs is because they are trying out things. Don't try things, mean business. Set off for one and that one only if it is working well with you. So this idea of trying this one doesn't work, you pick another one. Ladies are not vehicles to be test driven. You just drive this, it malfunctions, you drop it. Powerful one. Ladies are not vehicles to be test driven. Ya, don't test drive people. Don't go breaking hearts. You know, hearting people left, right. I mean, be kind. How did you do it? You are advising us as youths. All the kids are watching today that don't kiss many frogs. Kiss one and go with it. Take that one home. Is that what you did? You never dated anyone? I married my ZP and that one. That is the one I kissed and I took home. Oh my goodness. That one. I am a serious man and I mean business. I hate the idea of hearting people. I hate people hearting people. I hate to see people hearting. The dating arena is a war with hearting people. People are hearting. And they continue to art until they discover how to do things right. I did once and that was it. Is it possible? It is. You only date once and the person you date is on you marry. Yes. It is possible. Hakuna kujoka? You know, love does not get wearing. It doesn't grow wearing. Hakuna kujoka. You keep finding the empas of love. You keep finding them. You keep captivating. Until you should be introducing something new in your love relationship. Every single day. Wow. Atakama. Udikuna nalala pandeyi. Keshu lala. Kita nalapik. Do something to make it enjoyable. Don't be boring. Can't get wearing. Is it possible to be boring in our relationship? It is. Ram, I will say this. Relationship don't work because of love. What makes relationships what? Knowledge. Of what? Your car can bore you the way you drive. But you need to know how to make your car serve you better. I don't know. In marriage, there are things people do and it gets real boring. Real boring. And people get bored with each other. People start emotionally disengaging. When people break up and they are trying to move on, you'd hear them say it started off well. And up at some point it did not work out. So I'm afraid that I might start another relationship and it might not even work out the way the previous one did not. Because when it starts, it's all roses. But as it continues, things change. Yes. People get lazy, people get complacent and they forget that you work on marriage. Marriage does not work until you work on it. And marriages are not made, don't fail. They are made to fail. Repeat that again. Marriages don't fail. They are made to fail. Yes. Because the people in the marriage stop doing those things that they used to do when they were dating. Actually, we should replay the things we used to do during dating. Because those are the things that used to move your partner. Keep the roses coming. Keep the dates coming. Keep taking out. Keep doing those things you used to do that your partner used to like. Keep doing those things. Kativate. It works by knowledge. Now, if someone breaks up from a previous relationship Yes. How can you be able to learn from that so that when you move on to the next one, you're well prepared, you're better off your wiza, you're stronger, you're better. Yet at the same time, you're afraid of making the same mistakes. How do you do it? People need to grow. You need to understand why the previous were never worked. And how to grow the things that made it not work. How to grow. Grow yourself. Men don't marry girls. They marry character. That's what people are looking for, men. Yes. We need to see this confident, composed, wise, settled lady. Wife material. I'm telling you, substance. We need substance. This lady will sweep you off completely. They say men are like kids. Men are like kids. Once you get married, they are told, take care of them like a kid because there are so many things you have to do for them. Because the man is out there making things work for the family. He is out there working to provide for the family. So there are so many things you have to do for this man. So the man needs to be taken care of. That's why in an ideal situation, a woman should not be working. What do you mean working? She should come and find the man is a king. She should find the man owning everything. She should have no need to work. You're saying, Johnson? Yes. I think it is right. How much she should not work? She should not work. When God created a man and formed a woman out of man and at the time God was bringing her to the garden, there was everything. There was everything. So you're saying a woman by the time you are getting into marriage you should find a man who is already having everything. These were men go wrong. A woman should find a man who is working to provide for the family. She should be working. The man should be working. What if you don't have a job? He must get one. So if you don't have a job, don't get into marriage? You are joking. You're going to make your family suffer. You may not have a job but you can establish a business. Do something. What I mean is do something to support your family. We have so many men out there who are doing nothing and they are making their families suffer. Okay, now let's talk about anger. Anger is one particular aspect that normally leads to a lot of chaos in relationships. Somebody is angry. You could be angry at a particular gender. And some people normally say that maybe at Wanawakewa they would give descriptions. I'm a man like this and they generalize. There is this anger that some people have towards men or women because of a previous relationship or deal that they had in the past. How do you handle anger but the time you move into marriage you're good. You don't make your husband or your wife suffer. Mostly it is I heard this from women who are coming from a fair relationship. They are bitter. Men are this. Men are chaos. Men are rabbits. Men are this. No, it is that particular one. We all left that particular one. So don't put us all in one basket. So it is that particular one. That particular one. In fact when you are saying all actually you are running away from reality say that one is that thing. That one is that cow. So it's okay to call the one you dated. Don't call him that. But again it is because of bitterness. Maybe you are mistreated and you have stereotyped things. Marriage works. Relationship work. It is about your input in them. That makes it work. If you don't give life to your relationship it will have no life. If you don't give it life it won't have any life. Marriage works. It does. But then how do you avoid still I need to hear that really. How do you avoid bringing anger to your marriage from past experience? Don't carry previous baggage. You need to work on yourself. You need to seriously work on things which could affect your future relationship. If you are an angry person you need to deal with your anger. You need to deal with your bitterness. You need to work on yourself. We have so many better ladies around. Some call themselves independent ladies. There is nothing called independent ladies. It's a lie. It's a lie. What do you mean there is nothing called... Independent ladies. This career women. It doesn't exist. It doesn't exist. It's a lie. It is a creation from the depths of hell. And they think that men they can do without men. Fine if you choose that path go that path. But God says it is good. So if God says it is good who are you to say it doesn't work? It is good. Even now it is good. Marriage is good. If it didn't work for you it doesn't mean it can't work for the rest of the people in this planet. It works. It works. It works. All the time. But... Amirik Jonson you're saying that there's nothing... there's no such thing as an independent lady. There's not... So you don't believe women should work? You don't believe women should be independent? They should. Women should... Okay you work because you have to unleash your potential. But I feel that you can run a business I mean a business enterprise. You can further your career. It is okay. As long as you and your partner agree the most important thing in family is to agree. Because the Bible says two cannot work together unless they agree. You have to agree. There's no other place on relationship where people need to agree more than in marriage. You need to be on the same page on everything, finances, career, in everything. I'm telling you. Now there are people who have been hurt in a particular breakup where... Let me give an example. A lady goes through a breakup and the man tells her bad things like... Without me you wouldn't have been who you are today. I took you to this place. I made you who you are. Now this lady decides to say I want to be independent. I want to start working. I want to be my own person till the right time. Now there is this phobia that exists that a woman will say that until I am financially stable I will never allow a man to buy me anything I will do anything for me. I will do everything on my own. Now when they get into marriage they will want to now separate things. They will be like I am on my own. Nime leta hi. Where were leta hi o. Because of how it was in the past. Now she wants to be independent even in marriage. Does it work? Women have been mistreated. Even those who are in marriage those who are in relationships that didn't work may not have been mistreated by their men who want to control everything. They want to control money. They want to control everything. So you find that the woman is working but the husband is taking all the money. So the woman is reduced to a beggar. That's why they want to have financial power so that they won't be begging or asking for from their men. They want money power. But the moment you get an understanding man you will give you everything. You will have access to everything. My item card is in your ear. How much do you need? Go with the draw. So a woman should not feel bad about trying or wanting to work fast and get financially stable. There's nothing wrong with that. There's nothing wrong with that. So what is needed is for the two partners to agree on everything. People assume a lot. Don't assume. Here you are one. No secrets, nothing. It is one. But you are doing this, I don't know. You are doing this, I don't know. She doesn't know. That is bagash. Yes. It doesn't work. It doesn't work. Let's talk about the issue concerning money. Before someone gets into that particular relationship, of course, finances might have been an issue. But apart of that now you've broken up with that person who was sponsoring you. That person was paying bills. He was paying for everything for you. And now you've broken up. Now you don't know what to do. Talk to that lady who is watching you today. How do they pick themselves up from that? Come on. Lady, they need first, you don't need the support of people to thrive. Yes, the source of your livelihood has been cut. So what you need to do is that do stupid things. Don't go looking for these things. They are calling sponsors and such. People to serve. Work hard to sponsor your lifestyle. Work hard to pay your rent. Work hard to buy yourself whatever you need. But the moment you want to get it using illegitimate means it comes with consequences. Charges have consequences. There's nothing for free. What you get things for free there are ladies who make mistakes looking for favours from men. At the end of the day they are going to pay for those favours. They will pay. What do you mean they will pay? It starts as a very harmless thing. Okay, okay. Take this. Okay, a gift here and there. A compliment here and there. What you are doing is you are bonding. You are bonding. There is an emotional bond being created. And at some point you start getting attracted to each other. What this man, this earthly man will do they want to sleep with you. How many lives have been destroyed because of indiscipline. They need to let them find work to do. Let them think of how they can run their lives independent of men if they are not married. Be independent. You need to be independent. I am trying to understand this particular angle here. When somebody keeps on accepting gifts the point that you guys will break up what do you need to do? Do you return those gifts? There are some because you don't need to see evidence of the former things. There are things you need to clear. Actually that leads me to healing. How do you heal from a broken relationship? There are things you need to completely clear from your life. There are things you can keep and there are things you can find a way to clear everything. Clear what is clearable if that is English. Clearing and forwarding. Seriously. So return them. Return those phones. I mean return them. But if it's a chair like this it's okay. If it doesn't want it back it's okay. If it's a chair you can keep it. If it doesn't want it. Don't need it. Take it back. Rulisha. Because it keeps speaking. Oh he gave me a car. Inasmuch as we are no longer together but he must be a good guy. And these feelings keep on visiting you. And revisiting you. So there are some things you need to return. There are some things you can't. There are things you need to return. He could have given you some money he may not want it back. You used the money that is closed. There are many marriages nowadays that are going through divorce. And it's quite interesting that divorce cases have reason. I don't know what you think about that. But there are many marriages that are going through that particular process. Troubling marriage. How do you move on to a new marriage after divorce? And what duration or timeline do you give yourself from one particular marriage? And till divorce now you move on to the next marriage what do you do? Ram, as a Christian divorce is not allowed until they say because of unfaithfulness but I don't want to go into that. But in the event you have divorced in the event you have divorced you know divorce comes from towards divided divorce you are divided both of you cause two visions parallel visions and you went to different directions just like disease disease you are diseased so once you are divorced and you would like to get remarried then you need to thoroughly work on yourself. What do you mean working on? Could you have been the problem for your divorce? Do soul searching. Ask yourself tough questions. Was I the problem or was it the problem? Was she the problem? Who was the problem? What was the problem here? You can't run away from your conscience. You know what was happening. If you are the problem you know you were the problem. If she was the problem you know very clearly and if you really want marriage then get serious about understanding how marriage works and leave the former garbage. Because if you carry it if you carry it into this other relationship you are going to experience the same problems Is that why some people marry divorce remarry divorce and that cycle Continuously because they never outgrow their vices they never outgrow their bad behaviors they never outgrow their bad habits they never work on themselves they are still behaving the same way Ram I am so mad about men many men I see when I go to hotels and restaurants even in cars they are so casual careless, reckless they behave like they are not married even women a whole gone man and the way they are contacting themselves is this Babanani that sense of pride what happened there is how you should behave when you are married with that dignity of a family man of somebody's wife that dignity has gone through the window in many families Is that why people break up now so easily someone is married they are just talking to girls they are inboxing girls someone is a wife what kind of life is this you are somebody's wife you are somebody's wife, behave like one come on, you are a husband you are somebody's husband throw the line stop behaving like some we have so many kumashio kumashio men sex worker who are men in fact they are outnumbering the women men I am telling you some statistics we need some seriousness in the marriage arena there are so many kumashio and marriage is about life business partnership and you know that's why I love what you said marriage is not a business partnership it is life it is a thing of the heart that's why we can start a business it goes south no hard feelings it is good but this one is a matter of the heart this is life now because of so many divorce cases that we are seeing in the country many young people are saying you know what I don't think I will marry I don't think I will go through it because if so and so can marry nabado wa chane they are like who am I who am I it is that phobia they are watching things people of I standing in the Sayuri are having their unions go south and so many problems others are posted online and young people are afraid to go into that arena because they are afraid of facing the same challenges life is private people go through different challenges so it is not about what they are going through are you ready to make yours work because it is so personal I love that are you ready to make yours work and if you broke up before it doesn't mean you can have a bad marriage now or a bad relationship because are you ready to make it work are you ready to do the work of marriage I want to take a job break and then we will be back and then you will tell me about this the aspects of people living in each other because of in-laws in-laws a mother in law her father in law just came in he came in wachane now this person is afraid of remarrying again he will say ah what? because somebody interfered with your relationship you will tell us more about that in-laws interfered with marriages mother in law her father in law where? where? that's a long ago zone let's take a short break the hashtag is a power talk show at Ram Maguko at Y254 channel is where you can be able to engage with us keep learning us no way watching us from give what you take in regards to this particular conversation power talk takes a break we will be back in a bit imagine a pleasure being with you this is power talk my name is Ram Maguko if at all you are just joining us you are just in time for the last part of this particular conversation how do you handle a breakup healing after a breakup how do you move on to the next relationship after your previous one and at the end of the day this particular conversation is under the notion that you are thinking of marriage you see how it is we are not talking about jokers here this is not kid play this is child's play keep talking to us the hashtag is power talk show at Ram Maguko at Y254 channel is where you can be able to engage with us let us know where you are watching us from and I shall sample your feedback a bit later on but for now let's keep the show going so I am with Jenson Chuma here he is you know he is and I do not know he is telling us things as they are challenging the men and the women out there that if you are a married man don't talk around as if you are not married if you are married do man you are somebody's wife behave like somebody's wife now I want to ask you this question how does somebody's husband or wife behave there is a code of conduct what is this particular code of conduct you are talking about here rules of engagement in the family that is very important there is a way I have never had a goat roaring a goat blitz a lion rose an elephant trumpets so when you get to family then there are rules of conduct how to conduct yourself how you should behave you should be intentional with your behavior you should be conscious of your status as a husband as a wife always be conscious so don't behave like someone who is not married for example talk about this married wife how should a married man behave talk about a married man this husband I see a lot of garbage out there this man is married he has eyes on other girls he is talking to them it is not bad to talk to them suggestively sending them romantic messages taking them out for dinas and appointments how do you do that sending them money how do you do that there are women out there who are just going out on dates and they are married how do you even do that stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it just know that I am married things I should stop doing we are at a festive time people are celebrating yes Christmas the new year and there is a weekend that is coming interestingly these weekends are interesting because 24th Friday 31st also Friday sherehe jamana na kupote ya nyumbani thasdi arodi nyumbani mandi no communication ya ametoka sherehe sheregani you know what women are saying they say you are a fake woman you are fake you should make your man stay at home you should make your man you should also be so admirable to your man ya you should make your man stay home so if your man wants to leave you it is you who is a problem you are causing him to leave you by your behavior what if it is a woman wants to leave the man should also search himself so if you should keep each other if the woman wants to leave it is a problem of the man and if the man wants to leave it is a problem of the woman ya and they are not working on their own problems you could be having a good man and you have your own issues and you are not working on them you could be having a good wife you have your issues and your issues affecting her and she has to leave unfutnitly for example so this particular notion and I know it is there many women have said it I have seen it let him sleep out let him sleep out as long as he comes back home I am okay now you are stooping so low where is he what is he doing you are like he has not sent me parking as long as I am here you are acting desperate keep your man fight for your marriage fight for him to be in the house be a fighter and if your spouse wants a divorce kata if he wants a divorce you cannot keep them by force if they want a divorce if she wants to go let them go because you cannot keep them against their will now I want us to handle the past somebody has gone through something and right now they are in a new relationship but now they have not shared or deal with their current spouse maybe they are married or looking forward to getting married but they have not shared their past experience with these particular spouse and it is something that they went through in the past it may be rape it may be an emotional trauma they may have gone through something in their previous relationship do you tell your spouse everything about you and your past as you move on to a new relationship if the past may affect your marriage or your current relationship it is important but if you think it won't affect you cannot share everything share what is critical are you saying it's okay for spouses to keep secrets no let me give an example someone was raped if they were raped there is some kind of fear they may have on man even when they are married they may be bit reluctant because of what they went through and the man may be wondering why so to save him tell him what you went through that he can help you to heal from that that's important tell him you are raped it will be so sympathetic empathetic with you and you know there are people who have broken up because somebody tried to rape this particular lady it has happened broke up with the man because the man tried to rape her now she cannot be in that relationship because she says I don't want to be with you till marriage but now he forces himself on her now she wants to live that's okay how does a lady move on from that you need to forgive yourself you need to know first the guy has revealed his true colors he is a bully he doesn't value you he is after sex you are telling him wait until we get married and if he behaves forcefully on you then he may do worse things forgive yourself do you tell your current husband that I was in a previous relationship and I almost got raped do you tell him that it is very much in order because they will judge you they will appreciate you for not giving him a chance to rape you for running away it shows that you are bold you may not reveal everything like you used to you used to be a party party girl that's not very important that's not very important what's important is you are here you are okay if you have a baby let's do wide kids you have a kid and she is staying with your parents and you don't disclose it will bring problems that will bring you problems you will leave you if you don't disclose such kind of information is important so you should be free be free if someone loves you and they will be very they will love you more because they see you are open you reveal your skeletons to them you've shown them who you are they show that you are honest and you are someone who can be trusted people like that people like that you are honest I'm looking at a particular scenario of Bonachumon and I know very well that this is happening and it is a cause of worry in many relationships and particularly married men married women somebody says I want to leave my husband or I want to leave my wife why they don't satisfy me how what do you mean financially sexually they are not meeting your needs needs can be physical emotional psychological financial actually the moment you get into marriage the man should understand this I'm coming here and I need to be met you must be conscious of meeting it is no longer about you but about the other person I must be conscious about meeting if it's a man meeting our needs all of them the woman must be conscious about meeting his needs because it's no longer about her it's about him making him so try your best to satisfy their mother is financial satisfaction emotional physical or sexual yes and this is the true thing it is now what happens in the case whereby and this is where I was heading to that the reason why you broke up in the previous marriage your previous relationship is because your partner told you that you did not satisfy them when it comes to constitutional matters of course now you're worried how do I move on to the next one you lie deliver that's a very big challenge to many marriages the word was in bedrooms code was and what both of them need is to agree don't be silent there's nothing to be silent about tell them this is what I want you to do do you tell them I asked I had someone call me I had a man call me and tell me the man really opened up seriously a man called you and she was like this one comes to sleep and goes to the moon she's going to the moon she's dressed like an astronaut I'm a valve there's a girl she's like she's a girl she's a girl and the man was told the guy told me she told me once a week he asked why and I think it's because this man did not have money and he was not providing as he should and the woman was like she was using it as a weapon to punish the guy it is so sad woman is punishing a guy because he doesn't have financial muscle you know she's using it as a weapon to fight the man how do you move forward because can't that break up a marriage it can very easily because as a woman you're not satisfying your man contugally and you're not talking about it it can bring issues if you are a man and you're not satisfying our contugally what you need to do is talk about matters talk about them it is a very important conversation to have how do you want us to go about that thing be open talk you're married there's nothing you can hide from each other hadam and he used to work in the garden of Eren they were naked and they didn't realize they were naked until they seen there's nothing to hide there's nothing to hide express your peace tell them this is what I want this is what I don't want and move forward drive the car this way ya this is what I want talk don't be silent about it otherwise it is a very serious issue it is a very serious issue actually they say what consumates marriage is sex you can be married on paper but until you you have you meet technically you have not consumated that marriage it is a very serious thing I have heard so many people calling me on that issue it is a serious issue I was on another radio and the men were like anytime I need to go that route I dictate the terms she has no say she has no say am I saying that she has no say should that be the case we have so many stupid people around me it is like the woman has no say over what the man does I want to ask you this particular question now for people who are getting into marriage and they have recently broken up and after a few months give or take or weeks depends on how it is somebody proposes marriage to you but you have just come from a previous relationship how long do you give it until you accept that proposal these are rebounds you should give yourself enough time to fast heal and while you are healing be careful because you have rebounds try as much as you can to keep up from the opposite sex they say they give you a shoulder to lean on but essentially you are investing in each other emotionally this guy is so good he was there when I was hurting and you think it is time to pay back you are making another mistake too soon so avoid rebounds avoid as much as possible avoid avoid main shoulders until you heal how long do you give yourself to heal you have heard people say that person moved on so fast so the question is how fast is so fast makes you fast healing takes time I don't want to give a definite time frame but healing takes time it depends on individuals take time to heal fast from the past heal completely and make a conscious decision tell yourself I am ready I have learned from my mistakes and now I am consciously ready to get into a relationship nothing is pushing me you are under no pressure when you are under no pressure people think they marry because of sex sex is just a small aspect in marriage it is very critical are you saying it doesn't matter okay it is an aspect so it doesn't matter but you just said it I said that those who marry because of sex and they go there they do it, it gets boring and they are like oh kumeta can get boring and they exit if there is your motivation then you will be surprised it is a fraction if you don't work on it it will get boring if you don't work on it it will get so how can a man come home and you are calling everybody come home when party apple slappa with a rose slappa with a rose or with one million slappa slappa with money slappa with money I have a very special person who is watching today and I want to ask you because initially you said that partners need to share yes they do now somebody is asking this what about partners who use what you tell them against you that is being insensitive covers a multitude of sins love covers it so if you love this person you will help them to outgrow their weakness someone who is using your weakness to fight you is not your partner and you know that's why people when they move to another relationship they won't share much because in the previous relationship when they share it came back to haunt them so they won't share in the next relationship now if you think it won't affect your marriage don't share it if it won't affect if it's not affecting you and it won't affect your marriage don't share Johnson I am told time is we have to but I have so many questions I want to ask you to be continued Ram we need to do this again we need to I just want to give you 30 seconds to have a final word I advise every person watching you today about what they need 30 seconds have a final word and that is it you need to heal coming from a broken relationship it is very important that you learn your mistakes and make conscious efforts to heal and grow out of the pain of the past be self aware of what happened and seek to heal and until you have healed don't get into another relationship so go through the healing journey until you reach the end and then you can say now I have conquered my past and then I can I can I can take on the next challenge I have conquered the past the demons of the past and now you can you can move on to the next mountain and conquer the next mountain yeah so be careful not to repeat the same mistakes in the next relationship wa wana johnson chuma it's a pleasure my brother thank you sir do you know this guy sings by the way the next time you come the next time you come we will play your music but that time the video will be ready I have a song called I can do all things it's coming on YouTube very soon alright watch this space thank you my brother that is johnson chuma a life coach a mentor motivational speaker an artist and a farmer oh yes a farmer but let's end that chuma brother before we bring it to a close I want to end with a quote as always you know how we do it and this you will tell me whether you agree with this or not before healing a wound before healing a wound you must first of all admit that you are bleeding before healing a wound you must first of all admit that you are bleeding you agree you must accept and that's how you can move on to the next relationship my name is Ram Maguko as always it's a pleasure being with you this is power talk see you again next Thursday right here on Y254 keep engaging with us the hashtag is power talk short Ram Maguko at Y254 channel a big thanks to everyone who ensured this show was a success a repeat of this show again comes tonight at 10 pm this is power talk