 Let me, you know, share with you a very interesting, lengthy conversation that one of the companions had with our fourth Imam, Imam Zaynul A'bideen, alaihi salatu wa s-salam. This is actually a psychological advice that Imam is giving to this fellow about how to deal with other people and maintain the relationships and friendship. Although the advice is of a general type, but we can focus and use that same formula and the solution when we talk about relationship between the family. And this is a narration from our fifth Imam, Imam Muhammad al-Baqir, alaihi salatu wa s-salam. He's the Ravi. He's the narrator. He says, one day, a fellow by the name of Muhammad bin Muslim al-Zuhri was known to be someone like a Sufi type those days. And he came. He says, one day he came to my father with a very sad face. And Imam looked at him and Imam said, o Zuhri, what happened to you? Why you look so sad, depressed? And he says, yibna rasulillah, humumun wa gumum, o the son of the Prophet, yes, I have aghaman ham. You know, I'm sad and I have issues and concerns. Tatawwala aliyya. He says, you know, I have been actually tested by Allah subhanu wa ta'ala by those who are jealous of what I have been given by Allah and those who have these eyes on my wealth and even those whom I actually hope to be good to me and even those whom I have been charitable towards them. All these things happen, but at the end, our friendship doesn't, you know, last. And so this is my hum and gam, my, you know, sorrow and concern. So Imam mentions something initially as a very brief statement where he says, ehef is aalaiqa bilisanik. Most of the problems start with lisan. Imam says, control your tongue. Tamlik bihi ikhwanik. Control your tongue. If you are able to control what you say and how you say it, you will be able to maintain your friends. But then Imam says something, this is for us, for everyone in any situation, especially in husband-wife relationship. He says, Ya Zuhri, amma aleykan taj'ala al-muslimin minna kya minna kya be manzilat ya'halibaytik. Imam says, O Zahri, Zuhri, you should consider the people that you interact with as members of your family. Then look at them. Fataj'ala kabiruhum be manzilat ya'halibaytik. If you see somebody who is older than you, then put him in the place of your father, in your mind. Fataj'ala sahiruhum be manzilat ya'halibaytik. If he is younger than you, then put him in the place of your son. Fataj'ala tiraabuka. And if they are of same age as you, then put him in the place of your brother. If you look at people from that perspective, Imam says, fa'iyuha ulaytuhibbu an-tad'ulim, whom among them will you be unjust to? Wa'iyuha ulaytuhibbu an-tad'u aley, who among them would you do baddua for them? Wa'iyuha ulaytuhibbu an-tad'u sitrahu. And who among them is the one who would like to, that you would like to expose them because of their weaknesses? You wouldn't do that. Because now you are treating them like a father, or a son, or a brother. And this is where we come to the beauty of, you know, we don't really have to go here and there. Books on psychology and this and that. This is the psychology coming from the Imam. But then Imam says, if you start doing this, treating people this way, then remember there is another problem. Even when you do good things, there is always bala attached with it. He says, when you start doing this and you have good friends, shaitaan comes to you and says, oh, you are very good. And once you start thinking this way, you might reverse this whole process. And so Imam says, wa in araba alayka iblis, la'naullah bi anna laka fadlan ala ahadin min ahalil qiblah. But if you start becoming good and shaitaan comes to you and plants this idea in your mind that you are better than everyone else, then Imam says, fanzur in order to reform yourself. And then your own attitude, Imam says, then look at those that you interact with. Fa inkana akbar ruminka. If they are older than you, whom you put in the place of the father, and then you compare that person to yourself and you say, fa kulli qad sabaqani bil iman wal amal al-salih. Well, this person is older than me. It means he lived as a mu'min longer than me. It means that he had more opportunity to do good deeds than me. Because I'm younger than him. Fa hua khairun min ni. Therefore, he is better than me. Remember shaitaan comparing himself to Adam, he says, ana khairun min hu. This is where Imam is saying, look at the older person and say, well, he has been a mu'min longer than you, had opportunities to do good more than you. Therefore, he's better than you and this arrogance will go. Wa inkana asgharum minka. But if the fellow is younger than you, Imam says, reverse the psychology here. Say to yourself, sabaqtuhu bil ma'afi wa zunub. I am older than him, I had more opportunity to commit sins. But he is younger than me. Fa hua khairun min ni. Therefore, he is better than me. Wa inkana thirbaq. But if the fellow is of the same age as yours, then Imam says, say to yourself, ana ala yaqeenin min zumbi. I am absolutely sure about my own mistakes and sins that I have committed. Wa fi shakkin min amrihi. But I have doubts about what he does. I'm not sure about him. So why should I, you know, give prevalence to the shak over the yaqeen? And this is where I would say he's better than me. Imam says, when you do this, fa innaka. This is the fourth Imam's guarantee. Fa innaka idha fa'alta dalik. That if you do this, sahalallahu aleyka aishaka. Allah will make your life and your life good. Wa kathur asdiqaoka. Your friends will increase. Wa farihta bima yakoonu min burrihim. You will be pleased with the goodness that comes from them to you. Wa lam taasafa aala ma yakoonu min jafatim. And if they are not good to you, still you will not care about it anymore. Salawat. Take this spiritual prescription, you know, prescription from the Imam about inter-human relationship. And use it in any situation that you find yourself, especially in a family life. You know the new bride, she comes into the family. Well, look at the father-in-law. He doesn't take, replace your father, but he is in considering him to be in the place of your father. The mother-in-law in the same way, the brother-in-law in the same way, the attitudes will change. The husband who is marrying your wife, when he looks at his own in-laws, same situation. Look at the father-in-law, place him in the place of your father. Respect him in that way. Respect the mother-in-law in that way. And this is where we will get this Sukun that Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala has guaranteed in the ayat from Surat Al-Room. Salawat wa maikbaratuh.