 this really bothers the narcissist there are many things that bother the narcissist there are many things that worry, disturb or upset them but there is one main thing that I am going to discuss in this video which bothers them more than most things it's something that really gets under their skin it's something that really gets on their nerves they don't want to ignore it or accept it and they don't want you to realize it but I believe that it is very important that you know about it and that is why I would like to share it with you in this video there is something that really bothers the narcissist something that they won't openly admit but they will do everything they can to try to control it what really bothers the narcissist is your freedom how you have a life outside of them how you talk to other people who are outside of them people who they do not know people who are not their fine monkeys the narcissist does not want you to have a life outside of them they do not want you to have your own life so interest things that they do not like things that they are not interested in if it's something that they are not involved in they don't want you to be involved in it either they see you as an object in their minds you exist to serve them when your time and energy is directed towards something other than them they see it as a waste they get very envious and jealous they believe that someone or something is taking away your time and energy which is meant for them they also see you as an extension of them as a part or component they don't see you as a separate individual with your own wants and needs your own likes and interests they expect you to want and need whatever they want to need and they expect you to like and be interested in whatever they like who are interested in when you do anything that displays your own individuality it reminds the narcissist that you are a separate individual and it makes them want to control you even more it makes them want to stop you from doing what you're doing which is demonstrating your own individuality because it is a reminder to them that you are a separate person with your own wants and needs your own likes and interests this is something that really bothers the narcissist they don't want you to have your own separate existence that doesn't include then they want to be joined at the hip they want you to be inseparable they want to be so close to you that you are considered one person and they hate being alone because it forces them to reflect on how they really feel about themselves they need someone close to them at all times where they can project both their delusional fantasies on to and also their feelings of self-hatred they need someone to support their delusional fantasies someone to validate their false self and the illusion that they are trying to portray and they also need someone who they can use as an emotional punching bag whenever they're feeling bad about themselves for them to do this they have to be able to project their negative or positive traits on to you whenever they decide to do so they have to see you as an extension of them which is difficult for them to do if you keep demonstrating your individuality if you keep having your own wants and needs your own likes and interests and that is why the narcissist hates to see you having any sense of freedom they hate to see you having the power or right to act speak or think however you choose to because then they don't feel free their idea of freedom is to disown their unwanted parts of themselves to refuse to acknowledge or any connection with them and instead project them on to you and force you to identify with them if you refuse to identify with what they're projecting on to you and you focus on your own individuality your freedom they begin to feel trapped they begin to feel imprisoned or enslaved as though they have lost their freedom your freedom your sense of individuality as a separate sovereign individual it's a serious threat to the existence of the narcissist false self as it makes it very difficult for them to project their negative traits on to you and that is why your freedom and your sense of individuality really bothered them your freedom is their confinement thank you for watching I hope this video resonated with you please like comment share and subscribe click the bell icon to receive notifications for my future videos if you would like to donate my PayPal link is in the video description coaching inquiries you can email me at thanks for the coaching at jimu.com thank you for watching and I'll talk to you soon