 When you go through something really terrible in your life, or ironically, when you go through something really, really amazing, it's really difficult to remember that both the really awesome things like falling in love or some huge career success are cyclical, as well as the most awful things like friends dying or getting sick or falling out of love or getting broken up with. Those are also cyclical too, because the thing is that these experiences usually don't just happen once. Now in this video, I thought I would share a story and some realizations I had that I think can help you during this time. What's up, you guys? Alex Hein. Now, down below this video, I've included a free download, which is for a free journaling worksheet. If you're struggling to figure out what the next step is in your life and you're trying to get your life together, check out that link right below the video. You'll also get a free email journaling series. Most great things and most awful things are cyclical, not one time events. The author, Kamal Ravikant, who was the writer behind the book, Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It, talks about, you know, in one other experience besides the experience of being suicidal after his business failed and then reinventing his life to save his life. But he told the experience of this one time where he had been on a trip and he was really in love with this girl he had been dating, was really excited to see her. And he got back from this trip and he showed up at her door because he wanted to see her and he was super excited after a while of not seeing her. But to his surprise, this girl that he was in love with, that he just flew to her house to see, actually broke up with him on the doorstep as if it were a movie scene. And he said that it really, really devastated him. But as he got to, you know, crying about it to his friends, so to speak, as we all do, he said, one of his friends or one of his siblings said to him, you know, you remember that girl you used to date, who you were really in love with and when that ended, you were really crushed. And then do you remember that other relationship five years ago? You were really in love with her too. And then with that ended, you were crushed. Well, maybe it's just a cycle. And in five years, you're going to meet another great person and then the highs will repeat themselves again and things will be great. And it got me thinking about how so many experiences, especially the awful ones, we think are catastrophic. The end of the world. Maybe it is something health related like severe depression or anxiety. And you don't know if you're ever going to get out of that hole. Maybe it is the breakup of all breakups where that was your person. You're certain of it. And you didn't see it coming. I mean, it was the definition of being blindsided. You thought you were going to spend your whole life with this person and they just broke up with you because they weren't feeling it. I mean, that is a hard experience to go through. But these experiences are often cyclical. So even though health problems, financial problems, love are often cyclical. So are the great things, you know, sleeping really well, having a lot of fun, doing amazing financially and saving a lot of money, traveling, being in love. These experiences are cyclical, which is so important to remember. But here's why I bring all of this up. There's a great book I recommend here a lot called Finding Your Own North Star by Martha Beck. And because these experiences are cyclical, if you are going through the depths of hell right now, you can remind yourself this is a necessary part of the cycle. And if things are amazing right now, you don't have to be afraid when they're going to end because things are always changing and transforming. So Martha Beck talks about these four stages or phases. It's kind of like the hero's journey of your life. She says square one is called death and rebirth. Square two is called dreaming and scheming. Square three is the hero's saga and square four is the promised land. Just realizing when you are in square one, where the mantra is, I don't have a goddamn clue what's going on, but that's OK. As Martha Beck calls it, just knowing you are there right now because you just graduated and now you have to rebuild your life somewhere new or you just moved and you have no friends for a year. Or you went through a breakup, that person was your whole life or a divorce. You have to rebuild everything, recognizing square one is death and rebirth. That's what you're supposed to feel like rebuilding. Nothing is wrong. You don't have to scramble back the last scrap of stability on the cliff's edge. You don't have to future pace to try to live in the future when you're happy again, recognizing that's what it should feel like. That's what it's supposed to feel like for everybody because you're building from zero. And then in the other phases, as you rebuild, as you learn to dream again, as years go by, things are stable and happy and going well, understanding that there will probably be another phase square one where even though life is great, guess what? Maybe you get sick. You lose your job, somebody dies, your inner new relationship or your long term relationship or marriage ends or you have to move. All of those bring us back into square one of rebuilding and you're supposed to feel scared as hell and uncertain as hell and fish out of water as hell. That's what it's supposed to feel like. So just recognizing that there's no end point until you die. It's instead cyclical and the longer you live, people have told me the more you experience these and where you could understand it's a cycle that you will keep going through and not just, you know, I conquered this for once. Now I'm good for the rest of my life. It's probably not going to go that way. So I think these two things can give you peace. Recognizing that things are cyclical and that the cycle has a progression that you can predict where you are. All right, guys, I hope that helps. I know this is a weird time for everybody, definitely myself included. But again, if you want to figure out some of those pieces where you are in that death and rebirth cycle, check out the free journaling worksheet below this video because it'll help give you exercises for rebuilding and redesigning your life. All right. And before you go, I have two related videos on this topic right over here.